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Aging and Flipping


purplekow
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I did not begin seeing men until I was an older man. I have always preferred to top and the few forays into bottoming have been mostly difficult and only minimally enjoyable. I do find myself still intrigued with the idea of being able to enjoy being a bottom, so I have not totally given up on it. Old habits die hard but old men rarely do.

In a thread concerning a twinkish Spanish porn star, someone posted that the beautiful older black bodybuilder with whom he was posing, was going to do severe damage to the young man's ass.

That led me to thinking about whether most of the men here who started out loving men at an early age have flipped or expanded the role they play sexually.

If you started out as a bottom have you stayed a bottom?

If you started out as a top have you changed that with age?

Versatile guys, have you slid into one role more than the other?

I expect that most of you have at least given the other role a try, but has anyone here gone from exclusively one way to exclusively the other?

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I started out as a pure top. Curiosity soon moved me to try "the other role", and I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed bottoming for the right guy (one of the best tops I had was Anton from Amsterdam, now retired). I was therefore really versatile for quite some time.

 

After I met my boyfriend, I returned to my "more top" role, since he prefers to bottom. I didn't quite abandon my versatility, though, and now, when I engage in anal activity with escorts, I top or bottom with equal pleasure, depending on the chemistry and the curcumstances. With my boyfriend, I am always a top.

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Im still so new to m/m sex that I don't know what I am. I have bottomed three times now, and each time was better, but no "bull's eye" yet. The idea of taking a cock up the ass REALLY turns me on ..(I live to serve!), but the reality still needs work. This is not a reflection on my escorts. They have been wonderful. I am still learning to relax, breath, and find my best position. Practice, practice, practice!

 

I have never topped. When I was young and hard, I never had the chance. Now, with ED and BPH, I'm not sure I can. I plan to try soon and work on it, but I'm more focused on bottoming, .......and lots of sucking, kissing, stroking, rimming, hugging, etc for now.

 

As a side note, I love how the virginal guys in gay fiction find Nirvana the first time they ride a ten incher. (As if!)

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For me, when I bottom, I usually REALLY enjoy it. On the times when the sparks are not flying, I'm not uncomfortable and I do like the knowing that my partner is (hopefully) enjoying the action.

 

I love the thought of topping and have a couple of very memorable times as the top. That said, I'm not confident as a top and don't do it often.

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I started out at 17 being a bottom not know what the hell I was doing. It took some practice butI think I got very good over the years taking everything from 3 inches to 10 plus with no issues. But as the years have gone by I've tried very hard to become more vers. But for whatever reason most of the time I am put in the bottom peg and rarely get to top when I would like too. Nothing drives me more batty than when someone who loves his ass eaten and fingered a bit but cries when I try to top them. I would love to top more but like I said rarely get the opportunity.

 

Hugs,

Greg

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Until I got middle aged I was a top. Then I thought I would try bottoming and mostly it just became working at taking a guy. I enjoyed it but I realized that what I liked was making the top happy. So I became a power bottom in the sense that I made the top really work at it. But I never really had a "power orgasm." I've always been jealous. :(

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I always knew I wanted to bottom. I started out trying to top because among my friends and family being gay was viewed as shameful, and taking it up the ass was the most shameful part of it. I had this idea that being a top wasn't as bad as being a bottom. I did not enjoy topping, and didn't try again much after the first couple of times. The first time I bottomed I loved it, and I hadn't changed that role much. I've tried to top a few times in the past thirty years, but it's never been an experience worth repeating; I think I just try from time to time to remind myself of why I shouldn't. One thing that has changed in the past five years or so is that I've become more turned on by providing oral service. I've become better at it over time, and I get praise, affirmation, and requests for repeats from casual partners. I find that I'm less obsessed with finding my next great top.

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You all know my story, but its funny, whenever I get cruised and have the possibility of a free hookup, the guy wants me to TOP. I must be doing something wrong giving off that impression ? I have to decline as the idea does not appeal to me ( I've tried, don't like it) , but I don't like to bottom either. When I tell them I am basically , some like the idea, but many don't... They want cock up their ass, but sadly it aint gonna be mine...

 

When I go to the sex club now, I wear a tag that says "ORAL ONLY".... it gets giggles and snickers, but at least the ones that want their cocks sucked or asses eaten KNOW where to find it.

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For me flipping, topping, bottoming has always been about chemistry, not my age or my partner's.

 

 

OH I agree that chemistry is most important, but Age affects male performance, and unless you are BLESSED, the greatest chemistry still wont allow many to perform without those little blue miracle candies, which I try to avoid cause I hate the after effects. .

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When I go to the sex club now, I wear a tag that says "ORAL ONLY".... it gets giggles and snickers, but at least the ones that want their cocks sucked or asses eaten KNOW where to find it.

My tag says "Have whip will flog"! I also have a tag for the nipple thing as well...;)

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OH I agree that chemistry is most important, but Age affects male performance, and unless you are BLESSED, the greatest chemistry still wont allow many to perform without those little blue miracle candies, which I try to avoid cause I hate the after effects. .

 

The running joke about Gay male sexuality is that when your cock gets too soft too often to Top, you just become a Big Ole bottom because your asshole will never let you down.

Well, I hate to break it to ya, JJK, but even our holes can let us down. Regardless of erectability (my word ;)) or accessibility, I hope folks don't fall for the notion that satisfying sex is all about insertion. The older I get, the more I want to discover different ways of pleasuring myself and partners. Try, try, try I shall!

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OH whippy, you so funny.... don't ya think carrying around that cat-o-niners will tip em off ????

Yeah! Ya got me! Actually I have a contraption oh my belt where I have multiple floggers hanging so that they are constantly at my fingertips. (A trick that I learned from a certain Sir Kirk.) That's why I usually wear the nipple tag as I usually keep the nipple clamps in my pocket. Though I do also have a certain reputation regarding using my bare hands as well in that regard!

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Yeah! Ya got me! Actually I have a contraption oh my belt where I have multiple floggers hanging so that they are constantly at my fingertips. (A trick that I learned from a certain Sir Kirk.) That's why I usually wear the nipple tag as I usually keep the nipple clamps in my pocket. Though I do also have a certain reputation regarding using my bare hands as well in that regard!

 

Which you no doubt must have learned from Mr Axiom, the King of open handed spanking..... ?

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Well, I hate to break it to ya, JJK, but even our holes can let us down. Regardless of erectability (my word ;)) or accessibility, I hope folks don't fall for the notion that satisfying sex is all about insertion. The older I get, the more I want to discover different ways of pleasuring myself and partners. Try, try, try I shall!

 

Do what I do, Try Hand puppets..... And now the floor is open to Mr Smith to tell us what the fetish of hand-puppets is called ?

 

0ac814663a52368068a9cf248b840073.jpg

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Which you no doubt must have learned from Mr Axiom, the King of open handed spanking..... ?

Actually I have a nice flexible leather slap paddle for that. I was actually referencing how I have been known to make guys cum in buckets simply by manipulating their nips with my bare hands. :)

 

For some reason I don't like using my open hand to spank guys as it induces a type of pain in my hands that is aggravating to me. And this from a person who has been known to like pain. ;)

 

Of course that reminds me of the time I got rug burn on my knees from being told to crawl on the floor. That really irritated me while the flogging and other stuff gave pleasure.

 

I guess we all have our strange limits...

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Guest countryboywny

For me, topping or bottoming has EVERYTHING to do with chemistry..

 

If the chemistry is there AND I'm relaxed and into it, bottoming is very pleasurable for me. My body certainly lets me know when any of these things are missing because it is very painful.

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I am totally versatile and enjoy both roles thoroughly. With clients I tend to be topping at least 80% of the time, and with my partner, probably 60% of the time. Because I top so much, I LOVE when I get the opportunity to bottom. I had a client a couple days ago who, after fucking for a little while, I put him in restraints, covered his eyes and did some electro play on him which made him rock hard. I couldn't resist the urge to climb on top and I road him until he was "finished", needless to say, he wasn't expecting it, but we both thoroughly enjoyed it.

 

For guys who want to experience bottoming or want to get better at it, but feel like it takes too much work, I share this story. 2 years ago I had a client in his 70's with whom I spent 4 days. He let me know that he really wanted to experience bottoming during our time together. He also made me aware that he is in a wheelchair and therefore would need a little assistance at times, getting in and out of bed and also the sling which he had already bought in preparation for what would be his first time with a man. I expected that it would take some time to fully penetrate him, as I'm not small, however to my astonishment and delight he already had a shower shot hooked up, which he was skilled at using and had toys of varying sizes that he had practiced with. It ended up taking far less time than I expected and we both enjoyed it thoroughly. So, when I hear a healthy and capable person say that they want to bottom but just don't have the patience, energy or time, I have a hard time being sympathetic.

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Do what I do, Try Hand puppets..... And now the floor is open to Mr Smith to tell us what the fetish of hand-puppets is called ?

 

0ac814663a52368068a9cf248b840073.jpg

My opening line for puppetry of the penis:

 

http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2012/250/7/a/sock_puppet_joke_by_ricken4003-d5dwlhc.jpg

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I am totally versatile and enjoy both roles thoroughly. With clients I tend to be topping at least 80% of the time, and with my partner, probably 60% of the time. Because I top so much, I LOVE when I get the opportunity to bottom. I had a client a couple days ago who, after fucking for a little while, I put him in restraints, covered his eyes and did some electro play on him which made him rock hard. I couldn't resist the urge to climb on top and I road him until he was "finished", needless to say, he wasn't expecting it, but we both thoroughly enjoyed it.

 

For guys who want to experience bottoming or want to get better at it, but feel like it takes too much work, I share this story. 2 years ago I had a client in his 70's with whom I spent 4 days. He let me know that he really wanted to experience bottoming during our time together. He also made me aware that he is in a wheelchair and therefore would need a little assistance at times, getting in and out of bed and also the sling which he had already bought in preparation for what would be his first time with a man. I expected that it would take some time to fully penetrate him, as I'm not small, however to my astonishment and delight he already had a shower shot hooked up, which he was skilled at using and had toys of varying sizes that he had practiced with. It ended up taking far less time than I expected and we both enjoyed it thoroughly. So, when I hear a healthy and capable person say that they want to bottom but just don't have the patience, energy or time, I have a hard time being sympathetic.

 

 

Encouraging words, Lance! I so very much want to be a power bottom who cums hands free. I know this is a lofty goal and I have soooooooo far to go. Right now I will settle for a comfortable fuck and maintaining enough of a boner to get myself off while being fucked. Practice is bound to make good, if not perfect. Right?

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Encouraging words, Lance! I so very much want to be a power bottom who cums hands free. I know this is a lofty goal and I have soooooooo far to go. Right now I will settle for a comfortable fuck and maintaining enough of a boner to get myself off while being fucked. Practice is bound to make good, if not perfect. Right?

I'd like to point out that both @glennnn & @Lance_Navarro will both be at the PS weekend...(ahem)

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