How do I be a better client?

[KJJ]

So only being a member for the past few weeks I have read a great deal of the threads. I have found so many of them to be very informative to the point I now wonder if I may have left some of the escorts I have reached out to inadvertently thinking I may be one those "flakes" or at a minimum aloof. So first of all let me begin by apologizing to any of you whom I may have left that impression, being fairly new to hiring masseurs and escorts in the last year I'm still learning how to reach out and sometimes I feel I may not be giving you the information you truly are looking for. It really is not my intention to do that.

 

This may be a subject that has been discussed before but I just have not found it yet. So in general the question's are how do I/we become a better client's? How much information do you want / need in the first few emails? What can I/we do to make you feel more comfortable with me/us as a client? I am thinking there are other newbies with these and probably more questions. I look forward to everyone's thoughts, escorts and other clients.

[seaboy4hire]

For me, when I was working I appreciated guys who were up front maybeeven blunt with what they wanted. Pics were absolutely never required to set up an appointment nor were stats. If you have a particular fetishbyou enjoy it might be best to being it up before meeting. That's all I can think of for now.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[+ Rickee]

So in general the question's are how do I/we become a better client's? How much information do you want / need in the first few emails? What can I/we do to make you feel more comfortable with me/us as a client? I am thinking there are other newbies with these and probably more questions.

You are correct -- there ARE other relative newbies (e.g., me) with similar questions. Thanks for throwing this out there.

[Mikegaite]

Client forum screen name(s) are helpful to me. Obviously you don't have to disclose this if you don't want to, but it's helpful for me in connecting the dots.

 

I don't really need some elaborate description of everything you are into. Just let me know what you want me to do with the ice cubes and honey...

[MikeyGMin]

If you don't want to come off as flaky client or time waster, approach them right away with a proposed time to meet. You will have time after that to talk about what you are looking for in the meeting. If you aren't a good match, you just mutually agree to cancel the proposed date.

 

Also try to separate any texts or emails that talk about what you want from the texts and emails that talk about rates.

 

A good rule of thumb is to try to get the meeting arranged with as few communications as possible. Let them know what is really important to you, and will make or break a session, but don't try to cover every detail.

 

I recently had a great session where we didn't discuss anything about the meeting other than the time and fee for an extended appointment. I knew the escort's reputation and just went with it. Turned out to be a great time and surprised me because I didn't limit it to my usual stuff.

[+ bashful]

As a client, I just try to be honest, polite, and respectful. Seems to have worked for me so far.

[+ purplekow]

Client forum screen name(s) are helpful to me. Obviously you don't have to disclose this if you don't want to, but it's helpful for me in connecting the dots.

 

I don't really need some elaborate description of everything you are into. Just let me know what you want me to do with the ice cubes and honey...

When an escort takes out the honey I know he is into attracting bears and I know I yell out "Honey....I'm home". Though ice leaves some people cold, I have found it to be an icebreaker of sorts.

[KJJ]

Thanks gentlemen I appreciate the advice, that's why I like this forum everyone is willing help each other out.

[+ Truereview]

Oops, sorry to join the party late! @KJJ - you are already thinking and acting like a great client merely by asking for feedback. I agree with most of the thoughts above. Would add:

• Be authentic. Escorts, of all service providers, can probably detect bullshit a mile away. They are in the people business, and the good ones will embrace you for any personality quirks you may have ( as long as you are not transgressing). Unless your meeting is a fantasy, this is your opportunity to shed any personal pretenses, particularly sexual pretenses, inhibitions, and barriers. Do so thoughtfully, but shed away!
  
• Have fun. This is a hobby, you should be having a good time and not coming away with deep psychological revelations or dilemmas. If a client wants/needs a sex therapist, he/she should go hire an accredited pro. Relieve yourself and your escort from therapeutic expectations. Actually relieve yourselves from any kind of high expectation and just live the moment.
  
• Keep it classy. "Classy" is not about the content of your engagement , but how you handle said engagement . Give your escort the best you can offer in terms of treatment: smile, speak clearly and openly, look them in the eye often, tell them what you enjoy and like about them, treat them as you would a guest at your home (even if you are at their home). Speak up when things are not going the way you hoped. Do not judge your escort too quickly when shit happens, instead be calm and work thru it open and honestly.
  
• Consider writing a quality review. Enough said
  

Your brand as client is just as important as the escort's brand. Three out my 4 new hires last year were referrals by one escort to another - a couple of these escorts don't actively advertise. I choose to think that this means the escort trusts me as a client and values my business enough to share with those who he trusts.

[jgoo]

I think MickeyGMN and Truereview are spot on. I will say that from my experience I try to keep it short and simple and to the point. There are so many different flavors of communications and requirements from escorts as there are escorts that you have to kind of go with the flow and see what kind, depth and frequency of communication that they feel comfortable with. I also leave it open ended and invite them to ask any questions they may have after I try to spell out my general ideas (requirements) for a successful get-together. Some want to know more about my expectations, some want to know more about me, etc etc. If you let them take the lead and answer them promptly and actually answer their questions then I think that will make it less likely for them to think you are a flake.

[KJJ]

Client forum screen name(s) are helpful to me. Obviously you don't have to disclose this if you don't want to, but it's helpful for me in connecting the dots.

 

I don't really need some elaborate description of everything you are into. Just let me know what you want me to do with the ice cubes and honey...

 

@Mikegaite thanks for pointing out providing you with our screen name, I sometimes forget that my screenname here is different than my other sites because it was already being used by someone else. Now where did I put that honey ...

[+ glennnn]

If you do your research in the reviews carefully, you are half way there. Most escorts give enough info to indicate whether you will be a good match or not. I'm still rather inexperienced, too, but I choose escorts who specifically encourage inquiries from clients in my more mature age group. Then I follow the excellent advice given above. I have been very, very happy with the results. I wish you the same success.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

you should be having a good time and not coming away with deep psychological revelations or dilemmas. If a client wants/needs a sex therapist, he/she should go hire an accredited pro. Relieve yourself and your escort from therapeutic expectations.

 

I agree with most of what you said and keeping perspective and expectations realistic is important, but I think some of us can act as a sex therapist for our clients. Accredited sexual surrogates are few and far between and a conversation with a sex/relationship therapist/psychiatrist can only do so much. I've worked with several guys in a very therapeutic and intent motivated capacity, even had a Psychiatrist at Stanford refer his client to come see me.

[mike carey]

I would absolutely agree that a session with a guy like Lance would be therapeutic.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

I would absolutely agree that a session with a guy like Lance would be therapeutic.

Ahhhhh! Thanks for saying that Mike.

[+ Truereview]

I agree with most of what you said and keeping perspective and expectations realistic is important, but I think some of us can act as a sex therapist for our clients. Accredited sexual surrogates are few and far between and a conversation with a sex/relationship therapist/psychiatrist can only do so much. I've worked with several guys in a very therapeutic and intent motivated capacity, even had a Psychiatrist at Stanford refer his client to come see me.

Good points & I agree, Lance. I do have a question for you: In order for us to be better clients and not unfairly expect a therapeutic session of just any escort, what should a savvy client look for/ask?

[ChrisWydeman]

Show up with a cleaned out butt

[+ Lance_Navarro]

Good points & I agree, Lance. I do have a question for you: In order for us to be better clients and not unfairly expect a therapeutic session of just any escort, what should a savvy client look for/ask?

 

I would say that escorts who are gonna be good at providing a guided and therapeutic session are likely gonna talk about "growth" and "learning" in their ads. Also, guys that describe themselves as SI's or Sacred Intimates are gonna take that kind of approach to their work. I do find that it tends to be older guys (at least 30, if not in their 40's or 50's) that tend to have the life experiences necessary to provide such an experience.

 

I try to approach each session with the idea that I want to give my client what they want, but I also want to give them what I feel they need. In the same way that when you go to a doctor, you aren't going to tell them how to treat you, I hope that my clients will trust me to impart my experience and wisdom into our session. Often it takes several sessions to build that trust, though sometimes in can happen in the very first. An example would be a client with control issues (don't we all have them), whom I might encourage to allow me to use some bondage and/or sensory deprivation to help them surrender. It may not be what they came to me for and it may be something they have never experienced, but I know the value of it.

 

Thanks for asking and I hope this helps those that are looking for such a session.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

Show up with a cleaned out butt

Yes, please!!! And if you don't know how, just ask.

[+ Truereview]

Show up with a cleaned out butt

Preferably both client and escort are adhering to this sage advice

[+ WmClarke]

Yes, please!!! And if you don't know how, just ask.

Or start a thread in these forums. It's probably never been asked here.

[ChrisWydeman]

Preferably both client and escort are adhering to this sage advice

One would hope lol

[LADoug1]

Or start a thread in these forums. It's probably never been asked here.

There was a thread on this topic very recently:

 

http://www.companyofmen.org/threads/cleaning-out.111314/

[+ WmClarke]

There was a thread on this topic very recently:

 

http://www.companyofmen.org/threads/cleaning-out.111314/

Yeah, I know. Sometimes I like to be sarcastic, without emojis to signal the sarcasm.

[geminibear]

Yeah, I know. Sometimes I like to be sarcastic, without emojis to signal the sarcasm.

What?!?! So what else do you like to without signaling?