Encounters With Escorts as Fantasy

[+ quoththeraven]

Whenever there are threads about clients falling in love with (or saying "I love you" to an escort) or other aspects of the client/escort relationship, I continually see statements that an encounter with an escort is a fantasy.

 

This puzzles me. Leaving aside role play, the theatrical/fantasy elements of BDSM, and that a boyfriend experience doesn't mean the escort is your boyfriend, in what way is the experience a fantasy and not a paid hookup?

[loverboy95]

I think they mean "fantasy" as in the escort is not an actual boyfriend.

[Rudynate]

I would say that realizing a fantasy could be an object of the paid hookup. For me, escort encounters are about hot sex with a professional lover.

[+ quoththeraven]

For me, escort encounters are about hot sex with a professional lover.

 

That's actually a better way of describing what I was trying to get at than "paid hookup." But since you seem to be differentiating, what fantasy might be realized through a paid hookup? A position not otherwise attainable? An act others might not want to engage in?

 

I'd call that wish-fulfillment, not fantasy. It's not as though it's not obtainable from others, just maybe not of similar quality.

[Rudynate]

That's actually a better way of describing what I was trying to get at than "paid hookup." But since you seem to be differentiating, what fantasy might be realized through a paid hookup? A position not otherwise attainable? An act others might not want to engage in?

 

I'd call that wish-fulfillment, not fantasy. It's not as though it's not obtainable from others, just maybe not of similar quality.

 

 

Fantasy and wish fulfillment may not be exactly the same, but aren't they very closely related? For many people, hiring is about being able to have partners who would normally be completely out of one's league. Is that wish fulfillment? Sure. Is that fantasy? I think so.

 

Also, some of those elaborate scenarios that people request of escorts - hot baths with rose petals, candles, etc., to me are sort of in the fantasy realm.

[+ glennnn]

Rejection is tough, and sexual rejection the toughest. I think in setting up any spontaneous, first-time sexual encounter there is an element of anxiety... will he/she be responsive? Am I fit, big, handsome enough? Will I be able to perform adequately? Are any sex acts off limits? What future expectations will be raised?

 

With paid sex I can relax and just exalt in the moment The fantasy is that none of the anxieties applies. I am handsome, big, potent, fit enough to be desirable, and the sexual boundaries are clear. Not sure this is on point. Just my thoughts.

[Wolfer]

The fantasy is that none of the anxieties applies.

Exactly that.

[+ Charlie]

The only fantasy I am into is that he would enjoy having sex with me just as much if he weren't being paid.

[Juan Vancouver]

When it comes to this, I think there are two main camps.

 

Camp one is certain that it is impossible man A would ever enjoy spending time with man B. Camp one states that the real job of man A is to act and pretend so masterfully that man B is convinced he is better than he actually is. Camp one thinks that by lying and pretending, Man A can make man B feel confident and hot. This is, of course, all make believe. This is a fantasy and would never happen in real life. One pays to be lied to, but be lied to in such a masterful way that I forget I am being lied.

 

Camp two is certain that regardless the apparent differences between man A and man B, real intimacy, pleasure, fun and enjoyment can be had by both parties. If it is true that it is unlikely both men might meet and connect outside this specific situation, (Given they live in different worlds, have no friends or activities in common, sometimes because of age or financial differences to name a few) when they come together, if they are both respectful, eager, kind and honest they might actually touch one another in a genuine, fulfilling and life affirming way. No one has to convince anyone else they are sexy... because when you are vulnerable and present, you ARE sexy and confident. There's no acting, no subterfuge, no convincing anything, no fantasy. This is a real, honest, personal experience with a professional that specializes in facilitating this kind of experience in a safe setting.

 

I believe there are escorts and clients in both camps. I believe each of us has a right to choose which one we prefer and it would be advisable to try to find partners who see this in a way similar to us, otherwise we will be left unfulfilled by our interactions.

 

When it comes to my work, I am not willing to lie or create flights of fancy. True intimacy and honesty are fantastic enough and damn fulfilling for me. The type of clients with whom I meet tend to value the same approach, so more often than not we have amazing experiences. But of course, there is something for everybody.

[mattr]

When it comes to this, I think there are two main camps.

 

Camp one is certain that it is impossible man A would ever enjoy spending time with man B. Camp one states that the real job of man A is to act and pretend so masterfully that man B is convinced he is better than he actually is. Camp one thinks that by lying and pretending, Man A can make man B feel confident and hot. This is, of course, all make believe. This is a fantasy and would never happen in real life. One pays to be lied to, but be lied to in such a masterful way that I forget I am being lied.

 

Camp two is certain that regardless the apparent differences between man A and man B, real intimacy, pleasure, fun and enjoyment can be had by both parties. If it is true that it is unlikely both men might meet and connect outside this specific situation, (Given they live in different worlds, have no friends or activities in common, sometimes because of age or financial differences to name a few) when they come together, if they are both respectful, eager, kind and honest they might actually touch one another in a genuine, fulfilling and life affirming way. No one has to convince anyone else they are sexy... because when you are vulnerable and present, you ARE sexy and confident. There's no acting, no subterfuge, no convincing anything, no fantasy. This is a real, honest, personal experience with a professional that specializes in facilitating this kind of experience in a safe setting.

 

I believe there are escorts and clients in both camps. I believe each of us has a right to choose which one we prefer and it would be advisable to try to find partners who see this in a way similar to us, otherwise we will be left unfulfilled by our interactions.

 

When it comes to my work, I am not willing to lie or create flights of fancy. True intimacy and honesty are fantastic enough and damn fulfilling for me. The type of clients with whom I meet tend to value the same approach, so more often than not we have amazing experiences. But of course, there is something for everybody.

 

 

Swoon.......

[+ DickyF]

The danger of the BFE is the client starts to believe they are really boyfriends. That's the fantasy.

It's not an orchestrated fantasy like role-play though frankly the BFE is a form of role-play. So it's more than a sex act.

[+ Truereview]

When it comes to this, I think there are two main camps.

 

Camp one is certain that it is impossible man A would ever enjoy spending time with man B. Camp one states that the real job of man A is to act and pretend so masterfully that man B is convinced he is better than he actually is. Camp one thinks that by lying and pretending, Man A can make man B feel confident and hot. This is, of course, all make believe. This is a fantasy and would never happen in real life. One pays to be lied to, but be lied to in such a masterful way that I forget I am being lied.

 

Camp two is certain that regardless the apparent differences between man A and man B, real intimacy, pleasure, fun and enjoyment can be had by both parties. If it is true that it is unlikely both men might meet and connect outside this specific situation, (Given they live in different worlds, have no friends or activities in common, sometimes because of age or financial differences to name a few) when they come together, if they are both respectful, eager, kind and honest they might actually touch one another in a genuine, fulfilling and life affirming way. No one has to convince anyone else they are sexy... because when you are vulnerable and present, you ARE sexy and confident. There's no acting, no subterfuge, no convincing anything, no fantasy. This is a real, honest, personal experience with a professional that specializes in facilitating this kind of experience in a safe setting.

 

I believe there are escorts and clients in both camps. I believe each of us has a right to choose which one we prefer and it would be advisable to try to find partners who see this in a way similar to us, otherwise we will be left unfulfilled by our interactions.

 

When it comes to my work, I am not willing to lie or create flights of fancy. True intimacy and honesty are fantastic enough and damn fulfilling for me. The type of clients with whom I meet tend to value the same approach, so more often than not we have amazing experiences. But of course, there is something for everybody.

I love this description. Thank you, Juan.

 

I would just add that to me, the world is not so absolute to neatly fall into one camp or other. Life would be sooooo boring if it was so. I'm in camp 3 - I enjoy fantasies even if they are based on a lie, but I'm also able to connect with my partners in unique intimate ways and build hot relationships with them. I'm also confident in my looks and ability to land man A, B, or C - even better if I can land them all at once. I just choose to pay because I can and, frankly, I'm lazy and uninterested in games - unless I'm intrigued enough to play. I will fuck who I want and I will love them as well. I've been hurt, I've been weak, I'm strong, I'm courageous and I will probably lie and be lied to. The one thing I know for certain is that I refuse to be boxed in.

 

PS- I'm interested in men who think outside the "camp!" Say "hi"if you are.