Time to keep kosher and not eat pork

[+ bigjoey]

http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/

[maninsoma]

Wow. You really should have put a warning label above that link! I didn't even read the article but think I will have difficulty forgetting the photo of the woman and the headline. Not a pretty picture.

[gallahadesquire]

OMIGOD! Did they arrest the Sausage for Rape?

[whipped guy]

Well I would guess Shaniqua's new nickname is Big Bad Johnson!

 

 

Scary!!!!

[+ Keith30309]

OMIGOD! Did they arrest the Sausage for Rape?

 

The 'expire date' ink on the packaging was inexplicably blurred <cough> so the sausage may either be a minor (and his name, Jimmy Dean, redacted) or alternately named as an unindicted co-consporkitor.

 

The more important question is did Walmart put the sausage back on the shelf?

[AdamSmith]

The other currently hot story of this ilk...

 

Woman Arrested In Walmart For Trying On Tampons In the Feminine Care Aisle

See more at: http://now8news.com/woman-arrested-in-walmart-for-trying-on-tampons-in-the-feminine-care-aisle/#sthash.1fXxuNNV.dpuf

[+ sync]

Amateurs! She couldn’t take the time to find the Kielbasas?

[oz_carter]

I need to wash my eyes.

[bigvalboy]

Well I would guess Shaniqua's new nickname is Big Bad Johnson!

 

 

Scary!!!!

 

I don't know about scary WG...Hmmm...

"He stood six foot six and weighed 245, kinda broad at the shoulders and narrow at the hips, and every body knew you didn't give no lip to Big John"

 

Nobody seemed to know where John called home

He just drifted into town and stayed all alone

He didn't say much, kinda quiet and shy

And if you spoke at all, you just said "Hi" to Big John.

Somebody said he came from New Orleans

Where he got in a fight over a Cajun Queen

And a crashin' blow from a huge right hand

Sent a Louisiana fellow to the Promised Land-Big John

(Big John, Big John) Big Bad John (Big John)

Then came the day at the bottom of the mine

When a timber cracked and men started cryin'

Miners were prayin' and hearts beat fast

And everybody thought that they'd breathed their last-'cept John

Through the dust and the smoke of this man-made hell

Walked a giant of a man that the miners knew well

Grabbed a saggin' timber, gave out with a groan

And like a giant oak tree he just stood there alone-Big John

(Big John, Big John) Big Bad John (Big John)

And with all of his strength he gave a mighty shove

Then a miner yelled out "There's a light up above!"

And twenty men scrambled from a would-be grave

Now there's only one left down there to save-Big John

With jacks and timbers they started back down

Then came that rumble way down in the ground

And then smoke and gas belched out of that mine

Everybody knew it was the end of the line for Big John

(Big John, Big John) Big Bad John (Big John)

Now they never reopened that worthless pit

They just placed a marble stand in front of it

These few words are written on that stand

At the bottom of this mine lies a big, big man.

 

 

Sounds like my kinda man... specially that part bout bein from New Orleans

[whipped guy]

I don't know about scary WG...Hmmm...

"He stood six foot six and weighed 245, kinda broad at the shoulders and narrow at the hips, and every body knew you didn't give no lip to Big John"

 

Sounds like my kinda man... specially that part bout bein from New Orleans

The "scary" referred to Shaniqua!

 

Regarding the original Big Bad John he sounds like my kinda guy as well, and as such I definitely would wanna give him some lip.

 

Incidentally I met Jimmy Dean years ago at Montauk on Long Island during my boating days. He had about a 50+ foot vessel that was aptly named Big Bad John.

[+ glennnn]

The 'expire date' ink on the packaging was inexplicably blurred <cough> so the sausage may either be a minor (and his name, Jimmy Dean, redacted) or alternately named as an unindicted co-consporkitor.

 

The more important question is did Walmart put the sausage back on the shelf?

 

 

 

Yes, but they agreed to mark it down a little. Waste not.....

[tyro]

This is why all y'all need to avoid the Evil Empire of Wally World...

T

[Kenny]

The other currently hot story of this ilk...

 

Woman Arrested In Walmart For Trying On Tampons In the Feminine Care Aisle

See more at: http://now8news.com/woman-arrested-in-walmart-for-trying-on-tampons-in-the-feminine-care-aisle/#sthash.1fXxuNNV.dpuf

One size doesn't fit all, apparently. (I'm guessing BJ thinks this is an authentic news site. Just because...)

[+ bigjoey]

One size doesn't fit all, apparently. (I'm guessing BJ thinks this is an authentic news site. Just because...)

 

 

Like "The Onion", fiction can be stranger than the truth. The side bar to the story should have been the big give away.

[+ Italiano]

If you read the other stories of that website, it's better than The Onion