Not Gay Men: New Sexual Identity?

[+ poolboy48220]

You say slut like it's a bad thing. :-)

[AdamSmith]

You say slut like it's a bad thing.

 

A close friend whom I originally met by hiring him has a boyfriend (who also fucks me) whose name for me is The Cockslut.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Just to avoid misunderstandings, I am a proud slut. Or I used to be, the years have calmed me down.

[BabyBoomer]

Just to avoid misunderstandings, I am a proud slut. Or I used to be, the years have calmed me down.

 

I'd say the meniscus surgery "slowed you down".

 

~ Boomer ~

[+ José Soplanucas]

I'd say the meniscus surgery "slowed you down".

 

~ Boomer ~

LOL. No, seriously, I am having very little sex the last 6 years. I think something may have changed in my metabolism, but I am indeed not as horny and obsessed with sex as I used to be.

[Samai139]

My nephew, a college senior, has told me his friends don't like labels for sexual identity. The only terms they use are "virgin," "non-virgin," and "slut."

Love this and hope it's true and not just "wishful thinking." Also wish this attitude prevailed when I was in college.

[Irish69]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjnzddPjhCE

[+ Gar1eth]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjnzddPjhCE

 

I've loved that for years!! It's almost as good as their Abercrombie ads.

 

Gman

[+ Tom Isern]

heterosexual and homosexual identities are actually very recent developments in western history. for an incredibly fascinating (and brief! everyone should read it! FDR makes an appearance.) discussion of how "straight" working-class men of the navy (@early 20th century) had sex with other men without it implicating how they thought of themselves or how others thought about them see Geo. Chauncey's “Christian Brotherhood or Sexual Perversion? Homosexual Identities and the Construction of Sexual Boundaries in the World War I Era.” Hidden from History: Reclaiming the Gay and Lesbian Past. Ed. Martin Duberman, Martha Vicinus, and George Chauncey, Jr. New York: Penguin, 1989.

 

for more in-depth analysis, see also his Gay New York: Gender, Urban Culture, and the Making of the Gay Male World 1890-1940. New York: Basic Books. 1994.

 

Kevin White takes on the evolution of heterosexuality in The First Sexual Revolution: The Emergence of Male Heterosexuality in Modern America. New York: New York University Press. 1993.

 

B. R. Burg's 1994 An American Seafarer in the Age of Sail: The Erotic Diaries of Philip C. Van Buskirk 1851-1870. New Haven: Yale Univ. Press. is a likewise fascinating explication of the diaries of Philip Van Buskirk, which reveal how easy it was for working-class men of the navy to have sex with other men, quite openly, without being thought queer, feminine, weak, different, inferior, or stigmatized in any way.

 

the belgians have a saying—"a hole is a hole, and a pole has no eyes." that seems, at least to my way of thinking, to summarize the larger history of male sexuality in the west. in many mediterranean and latin cultures there is still no stigma attached to penetrating; only to being penetrated. that IS the ancient tradition, in cultures before the end of the 19th century, which had never heard the words or heard of the identities "straight," "heterosexual," "gay," or "homosexual." those words/phrases/constructs would be gibberish to anyone living before the end of the nineteenth century.

[+ friendofsheila]

Dan Savage on "Not Gay Men Who Have Not Gay Sex With Other Not Gay Men."

 

But the idea of straight men actively hunting for butt sex with other straight men but they're not Gay or even Bi? So you're not gay unless your fuck buddy is gay?

 

 

This idea has been around a really, really long time. Guys who think they're inventing this now are doing the same "circumvention tango around The Gay Identify" that men were doing ages ago.

[+ friendofsheila]

This idea has been around a really, really long time. Guys who think they're inventing this now are doing the same "circumvention tango around The Gay Identify" that men were doing ages ago.

 

This reminds me of a really good play I saw in LA about a strip joint that was a front for a gay bar. One male character said, "There's nothing gay about two straight guys gettin' it on."

 

It also brings up the goofy conundrum: "What if they man you're having sex with SAYS he's not gay, but actually IS gay and doesn't tell you? Does that mean you're only not gay when you're having gay sex with him?"

[Mocha]

This idea has been around a really, really long time. Guys who think they're inventing this now are doing the same "circumvention tango around The Gay Identify" that men were doing ages ago.

 

There so much gay identity crisis out there, even among gays themselves. I get so tired of the conversations my gay friends have about sex, that I don't even want to hear it no more. Especially are the ones who sit around and deny they've had sex with a person who maintains they did have sex.

 

One guy I know, lusts after straight men and men with kids. He even puts down gay tops who suck dick, yet he's the one who talks about how much he sucks dick himself. He just can't get it thru his head as to why that's wrong, a waste of time, and how it furthers the stereotype of gay men. I should have know that going to the local amusement park last week would just arouse and feed into this guy's fantasy to death. He drove me fucking crazy, until the end of the night I told him around a group of straight people....STOP TRYING TO FIND A FATHER BETWEEN THE LEGS OF THESE STRAIGHT MEN. YOURE NEVER GOING TO FIND HIM THERE.

 

So I understand why he's so obsessed, but it's no excuse. Sexually confused people can be some of the most difficult to be around. If there was a passages Malibu for that.