Hiring a porno actor who BBs

[winston]

I want to hire a porno actor who, in his movies, barebacks as a top and as a bottom. This escort is my fantasy man and has one excellent review on this site. Here is why I think it's ok:

 

1) There will be no barebacking when I'm with him. Any anal sex will be with a condom.

2) I like giving blowjobs and will definitely service his dick, but oral sex is not high risk.

3) Although the perception is that someone who barebacks in movies is more likely to be HIV+, the reality is, anyone you just meet could have HIV or another STI and you need to behalf accordingly.

 

Do I have valid points or is this my little head trying to convince my big head to do something stupid?

[Guest]

Always assume anyone you have sex with has HIV and is contagious, unless there is a long-term partner with whom you are monogamous. This is especially true for escorts, and unbelievably true for those who admit to barebacking, who will have HIV in most cases.

[MiamiLooker]

Although the perception is that someone who barebacks in movies is more likely to be HIV+, the reality is, anyone you just meet could have HIV or another STI and you need to behalf accordingly.

 

Or, he could be exceptionally stupid and cares nothing about his health (or those he has sex with). What do you find attractive about him?

[marylander1940]

Always assume anyone you have sex with has HIV and is contagious, unless there is a long-term partner with whom you are monogamous. This is especially true for escorts, and unbelievably true for those who admit to barebacking, who will have HIV in most cases.

 

Smart!

[LookingAround]

Your logic makes sense OP.

[winston]

Always assume anyone you have sex with has HIV and is contagious, unless there is a long-term partner with whom you are monogamous. This is especially true for escorts, and unbelievably true for those who admit to barebacking, who will have HIV in most cases.

 

I couldn't agree more. I'm also curious to hear opinions about my question, which more succinctly stated is "is it stupid or reasonable to hire an escort/porno actor who barebacks in movies?" Thanks!

[Guest]

It's reasonable to hire an HIV positive person. If you've hired escorts, you've probably already hired an HIV positive man whether you know it or not. That being said, all else being equal, I'm less likely to hire someone I know barebacks (either because they do it in public/movies, or because they advertise as doing safe sex "sometimes"), because someone that stupid is also more likely to do other stupid things, namely not take his medication, for example, which would put me at a somewhat greater risk.

[marylander1940]

It's reasonable to hire an HIV positive person. If you've hired escorts, you've probably already hired an HIV positive man whether you know it or not. That being said, all else being equal, I'm less likely to hire someone I know barebacks (either because they do it in public/movies, or because they advertise as doing safe sex "sometimes"), because someone that stupid is also more likely to do other stupid things, namely not take his medication, for example, which would put me at a somewhat greater risk.

 

I couldn't agree with you more.

Let's see if you get called "condom-Nazi" as I've been named a couple of times.

[Strafe13]

I couldn't agree more. I'm also curious to hear opinions about my question, which more succinctly stated is "is it stupid or reasonable to hire an escort/porno actor who barebacks in movies?" Thanks!

 

I think your seeking of answers on this site will not be particularly useful, since you already seem to have a good head on your shoulders, and know how to mitigate your HIV risk accordingly. The opinions of others aren't really relevant, but to the extent you want them anyway, you're likely to get two polar opposites. The first is the opinion you've already received (and apparently share), which is that your hiring of an escort who barebacks should be of no moment since consistent traditional safer sex practices and philosophy (meaning condom usage) presumes that all partners are potentially HIV positive and infectious (not always the same thing, BTW), such that one should use condoms with every sex partner. The other, also expressed often on this forum, is that any escort who barebacks, either in private, in porn, or with other clients, should never be hired, and should be avoided at all costs.

 

You just have to make the decision that's best for you, while also trying to be as informed as possible of the risks and present state of the science concerning HIV transmission, including PREP, and medication-compliant positive individuals, who are undetectable. Best of luck to you, but as I mentioned earlier, you seem to have a good head on your shoulders. Good luck, have fun, and report back. Can't wait to hear how everything worked out, either in a private message, or by formal review. Take care.

[+ quoththeraven]

I don't see how an HIV+ escort not taking medication puts a client at higher risk other than with respect to unprotected oral sex. Or unless a condom breaks, but (a) that can be monitored and (b) I suspect the likelihood of that happening is a lot less than many people think it is. As in I don't buy the effective rates in the low 80s as anything but tossing in all the real-life slackers who say they use or rely on condoms but don't always. If you're making an effort to use condoms carefully and consistently, the effective rate is closer to the low 90s I've seen as condom's effectiveness in preventing pregnancy.

 

This is what I don't get about avoiding escorts who bareback in film or admit to not always playing safe. Assuming they'll agree to using a condom with a client who wants it (or to the client using a condom, if the client's topping) -- and if they don't agree, their idea of client service is offbase and they should get out of the biz -- the risk is minimal if at all. So avoiding them seems more like a way of expressing moral outrage or an economic boycott. In either case, I don't see it as being very effective at anything other than making the client feel righteous.

 

To answer your question: With the possible exception of your plans re: oral, I don't see what you plan on doing as risky, let alone high-risk, with respect to HIV. There are still risks with respect to other STIs that a condom won't protect you against.

[Rudynate]

I wouldn't let it stop me.

 

Ignore the hysteria, look at the science.

 

23 years ago, I met the love of my life. He had a T-cell count of 200, he got thrush and shingles occasionally and was fully expecting to be dead within a few years. At that time, the most advanced antiviral available was DDC. I ignored the hysteria and looked at the science and took the plunge.

 

I've been having safe sex with him for all of those 23 years and remain HIV-free.

[MiamiLooker]

Do you trust that someone who you know regularly barebacks will think that a condom breaking while he’s f*cking you is a big deal?

[Rudynate]

Do you trust that someone who you know regularly barebacks will think that a condom breaking while he’s f*cking you is a big deal?

 

 

The OP didn't say he was going to bottom.

 

I'm also suspicious of the frequent reports of condoms breaking. In the 30+ years of the epidemic, I have had one broken condom incident, and that was back in the early days when we were all just coming to terms with the necessity of safe sex and just getting used to sex with condoms.

 

Not saying it doesn't happen, but I think condoms breaking is overreported. I just checked and the incidence of breakage is about 2%.

 

Of course, it's best not to bottom, which works fine for me because I much prefer to top. I do acknowledge that someone who bottoms is at a somewhat increased risk of infection from accidents.

 

On the occasion that I bottom, I don't let the top come inside of me.

 

Also, when discussing people who bareback in this forum, there is often a subtext that people who bareback are deviant or amoral, and that it would be foolish to trust them. In fact, people who bareback, other than the fact that they bareback, are pretty much like you and I. Of course you can't trust somebody who barebacks...we already know that the most reliable risk mitigation is not to trust anybody anyway.

[winston]

I think your seeking of answers on this site will not be particularly useful, since you already seem to have a good head on your shoulders, and know how to mitigate your HIV risk accordingly....

 

It's probably true that I have a good head on my shoulders, but it's also true that my libido sometimes leads me to bad decisions. I'm hoping for a reality check from people who have thought about this question and have had to deal with it. Unfortunately I can't call my mom and ask what she thinks. You all on this forum are who I have for this reality check.

 

The OP didn't say he was going to bottom.

 

I actually would like to bottom for this escort although he's very well endowed so it may not work. Doesn't mean I won't try.

 

Regarding the speculation that he could be HIV positive, is it true that most gay porno studios require their actors to be tested frequently? If so, wouldn't it be less likely that my actor/escort is HIV positive than another escort who might lie about never barebacking?

[Strafe13]

It's probably true that I have a good head on my shoulders, but it's also true that my libido sometimes leads me to bad decisions. I'm hoping for a reality check from people who have thought about this question and have had to deal with it. Unfortunately I can't call my mom and ask what she thinks. You all on this forum are who I have for this reality check.

 

 

 

I actually would like to bottom for this escort although he's very well endowed so it may not work. Doesn't mean I won't try.

 

Regarding the speculation that he could be HIV positive, is it true that most gay porno studios require their actors to be tested frequently? If so, wouldn't it be less likely that my actor/escort is HIV positive than another escort who might lie about never barebacking?

 

Winston, you'll never be in a position to know for certain whether the escort (or other sex partner) you're with is actually HIV-positive at the exact moment you're with him, or to know whether he is infectious, and to what extent. That he may have done BB porn does nothing to change that limitation on your base of knowledge. And despite the good intentions of some of us here on this forum, as a general matter, it would behoove you not to depend on anonymous internet posters as your reality check. Instead, take the time to do the research, learn the most recent science on HIV transmission risks and safer sex practices, and then make your decision. The reason that I, and others, have said you have a good head on your shoulders is that your insistence on using condoms with this escort would seem to demonstrate that you have at least a good, rudimentary understanding of the issues, in that you seem to be treating this escort the way you should any sex partner -- as potentially positive and infectious. That shouldn't change based on his porn history.

 

I'd also encourage you to research PREP, and discuss with your healthcare provider whether it would make sense for you to be on it, as its HIV prevention efficacy rate (when consistently taken) is extremely high, even exceeding condom usage in some of the most recent research. That's a decision that you should make after researching and discussing it with your doctor. Let that, not anonymous internet posters, be your reality check.

[marylander1940]

Do you trust that someone who you know regularly barebacks will think that a condom breaking while he’s f*cking you is a big deal?

 

No, I wouldn't trust him, I would stick to condoms I would minimize the risk hiring guys who to my knowledge don't BB in front of the camera.

 

One more thing I've only had 2 condoms breaking in my life and I've noticed it right away.

[+ Gar1eth]

 

 

Regarding the speculation that he could be HIV positive, is it true that most gay porno studios require their actors to be tested frequently? If so, wouldn't it be less likely that my actor/escort is HIV positive than another escort who might lie about never barebacking?

 

To some extent it depends on what tests the studios perform. And I'm not sure which ones they use. Different tests have different window periods where you can be positive but the test won't show it.

 

Also some studios will pair HIV positive guys with other HIV positive guys.

 

But just because anyone has a negative rest today-doesn't mean that 24 to 48 hours later they couldn't turn positive.

 

Your best bet-especially if you are going to try to bottom for a guy who routinely barebacks and perform oral on him would be for condoms when he is topping you, condoms when you perform oral (I realize that's a long shot), and for you to go on Truvada.

 

Gman

[marylander1940]

To some extent it depends on what tests the studios perform. And I'm not sure which ones they use. Different tests have different window periods where you can be positive but the test won't show it.

 

Also some studios will pair HIV positive guys with other HIV positive guys.

 

But just because anyone has a negative rest today-doesn't mean that 24 to 48 hours later they couldn't turn positive.

 

Your best bet-especially if you are going to try to bottom for a guy who routinely barebacks and perform oral on him would be for condoms when he is topping you, condoms when you perform oral (I realize that's a long shot), and for you to go on Truvada.

 

Gman

 

I would go like this too... if he BBs on camera, I'm sure he BBs up and down the city.

 

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs1/1921124_o.gif

[MiamiLooker]

On the occasion that I bottom, I don't let the top come inside of me.

 

Do you do that by pressing your ass-cheeks together?

[rvwnsd]

I want to hire a porno actor who, in his movies, barebacks as a top and as a bottom. This escort is my fantasy man and has one excellent review on this site. Here is why I think it's ok:

 

1) There will be no barebacking when I'm with him. Any anal sex will be with a condom.

2) I like giving blowjobs and will definitely service his dick, but oral sex is not high risk.

3) Although the perception is that someone who barebacks in movies is more likely to be HIV+, the reality is, anyone you just meet could have HIV or another STI and you need to behalf accordingly.

 

Do I have valid points or is this my little head trying to convince my big head to do something stupid?

 

I think you have very valid points and have reached a rational conclusion.

 

Regarding the posts advising you to use Truvada in conjunction with hiring an escort who barebacks on film, I don't see why Truvada is advised with this guy versus escorts who don't perform in bareback films. You know this guy barebacks. No guessing, no wondering. He barebacks. You don't know whether an escort (or anyone else) who doesn't perform in bareback films or doesn't state he barebacks actually doesn't bareback. Moreover, you don't know whether the guy who barebacks in videos is HIV+, much like you don't know whether the guy who states "safe only" is HIV -.

[Steven_Draker]

Someone who barebacks (in porn or in real life) is by definition more EXPOSED to all kinds of venereal diseases (not only HIV). Please also consider that each STI has a different incubation period and sometimes your partner may not be aware of his infection. Practice safer sex and test regularly.

 

I wish more guys were upfront about their status(es) and about their sexual practices. Be advised that someone who barebacks will be less scrupulous about safer sex practices with you (even if you play safe and request condoms).

[Rudynate]

Do you do that by pressing your ass-cheeks together?

 

Well, I'm not tied down or restrained. If I thought he was getting ready to come, I would make him pull out. As it has happened, I just tell him he can't come inside of me, and he agrees and doesn't. If he pulls out and finishes himself off, that's reasonably good evidence that he didn't come inside of me.

 

 

But for me bottoming is an extremely rare event. I haven't ever been lied to because I don't give anybody an opportunity to lie to me. I don't ask about their status or their sexual history and they don't volunteer it. People don't ask me about my status or my sexual history either. I don't know, maybe I just am fortunate to run with the right crowd, but condoms and safe sex are always implicit.

[Guest]

Regarding the speculation that he could be HIV positive, is it true that most gay porno studios require their actors to be tested frequently? If so, wouldn't it be less likely that my actor/escort is HIV positive than another escort who might lie about never barebacking?

 

Actually, the two times a person with HIV is the most contagious is shortly after infection, and when he's close to death. Shortly after infection, before the body has had a chance to mount an immune response, the HIV antibody test will be negative, but the viral load will be extremely high. So bare-backing porn stars are very high risk hires.

[thickornotatall]

when I hire I always ask about safe sex...just want to hear the answer....and then assume that is not true....I hope the same for me....practicing safe sex with a condom anally is the one of the only ways to have almost 100% protection I always tested negative....even after finding out that a partner is now positive....my partner died in 1983 of AIDS.....my 2nd partner died of AIDS in 1989.....my doctor believes that because I have not had anal the chances were very low to minimal that I would be infected....After many years I have been tested 4 times/year....I have never had any STD..ever....and have been out since 12 years old....I have never been sick....maybe a cold....sniffles...that's it...My immunity is very high I guess.....now I have arthritis....and that is awful....but manageable.....

[Nvr2Thick]

It's probably true that I have a good head on my shoulders, but it's also true that my libido sometimes leads me to bad decisions. I'm hoping for a reality check from people who have thought about this question and have had to deal with it. Unfortunately I can't call my mom and ask what she thinks. You all on this forum are who I have for this reality check.

 

 

 

I actually would like to bottom for this escort although he's very well endowed so it may not work. Doesn't mean I won't try.

 

Regarding the speculation that he could be HIV positive, is it true that most gay porno studios require their actors to be tested frequently? If so, wouldn't it be less likely that my actor/escort is HIV positive than another escort who might lie about never barebacking?

 

I'm curious; you seem to have thought through most of the issues. If the escort told you that he is HIV+ would you still meet him and plan to connect for protected anal and unprotected oral sex?

 

Also, have you asked his HIV status, or do you plan to?