Minimum Language Skills

[axebahia]

I just called an escort who avertised as fluent in Dutch and English but who could not converse over the phone in English. He then passed the phone to his "BF" to make the appointment. I politely declined. Do you expect minimum language skills from your escorts?

[+ Lucky]

No, I do not. It is so nice to have a good time "communicating" with an escort who speaks no English at all. Many times the escorts I meet are immigrants or I am a tourist that I consider it part of the fun to see how well we can communicate without words. A smile can say so much...

However, for a person born here who can not speak English one could be disappointed if the person is clearly not well-educated, but then again, how much talking do you have to do to serve the purpose? It is only on this website that I expect basic literacy!

[OneFinger]

I only expect minimum language skills in their native language. I certainly wouldn't expect an escort from France or Russian to be fluent in English.

 

Although he wasn't an escort, I've dated a deaf man who had minimal oral language skills. (His other oral skills were fantastic.)

 

Language barriers can affect the quality of the experience. But, as long as you know upfront about their language skills, the choice is still yours. Unless we both had a common language for communication, I would probably NOT make an appointment.

 

The only issue I have is that they guy you mentioned claimed a level of language skills that apparently wasn't accurate. I would consider that a poor advertising technique and would question the rest of his stats also.

[paulsf]

A few months ago, I was going to Ft.Lauderdale and met a boy in a chat room that sounded like a lot of fun. We exchanged several emails detailing what I was looking for. When I arrived, I called to confirm with all the hotel details and times. We chatted and all sounded great. At the appointed time, my phone rang and I was greeted with,

Hi we are here. Just need to let you know that Johnny doesn't speak english. Do you speak Spanish? I am his driver and do all his emails and phone calls.

I was just about to cancel the whole thing, when I got the knock on the door, and the boy was really hott. I decided to go thru with it, and lucked out that language wasn't an issue. It was a fantastic time with a very hott boy. But there is a feeling of violation, in that you are expressing your sexual fantasys with someone other than the boy you are going to be playing with. But it does help if you can converse just a little.

paulsf

[+ Lucky]

Speaking of language skills, why do you keep referring to him as a boy? We here are all consenting adults, which should make him either a man or a guy, but "boy?" Of course, nowadays it is "boi." Whatever.

[Guest bollocks]

Paul, I would have been taken aback as well. I am glad that the session went well for you. Did you review this young man? If not, would you please give more info? Thanks.

[+ Charlie]

I expect an escort to have the language skills that he claims to have, although I have been around enough to realize that people don't always evaluate their own skill level as I would. I am surprised at your experience in this case, since most young Dutchmen can manage a good deal of English, especially if they deal with tourists. Of course, many escorts in Holland are foreigners themselves, and have had to put their energy into becoming at least minimally fluent in Dutch to function in the local community. I rarely hire escorts in countries where I don't have a minimal command of the local language myself, because I find it uncomfortable to have sex without some verbal communication (though I did have lots of fun once with a deaf and dumb Eskimo.)

[Guest Tomcal_]

Lucky, I don't know about here, but in Brazil, the "boys" refer to themselves as "boys" or Rent boys, well past 25 yr. My first trip back about 2 years ago I posted about the boys in the saunas in Rio and a fellow M4M took offense at my using that term, saying it was demeaning, he was African American. However, if you refered to them in Rio as "men" they might take offense as I think they reserve that for those over 40! They will often ask you, "do you like that boy over there? Do you want to invite those boys to dinner? Etc."

As long as they get naked, I don't really care what they want to be called! LOL

[+ Axiom2001]

"...with a deaf and dumb Eskimo." No, sir, it should have been written "...with a deaf Eskimo." A friend of mine was castigated some years ago for equating the deaf as being dumb too and misused the language in reference to persons who are deaf and of varying degrees of intelligence. Was Helen Keller or currently Ms Matlin dumb?

 

Many of us are sensitive at this site, so please read and edit your responses before posting them! Thanks!

[+ Lucky]

Tomcal, we are not in Brazil, where of course we would do as the Brasilians do. The term boy is just not judicious in the modern fashion, especially when referring to a minority. But I am probably in the minority here.

Incidentally, I hope you are feeling better.

L

[+ Lucky]

"Many of us are sensitive at this site"

 

[+ Axiom2001]

I personally do NOT expect escorts to be fluent in English if I am in another country, but their knowing some English and my knowing his language would help in communicating.

 

Last February/March when I was in Rio at one of the saunas, one of the sauna "boys"/guys wanted to get with me. I was stirred but was not interested at the time. He asked another lad to communicate with me; the guy did, and I politely informed him that I was not interested.

Later during the evening, I saw the escort again; by this time he sported a super-raging hardon; I said: "cabine"! He made arrangements, and off we went! Without speaking-- we had torrid sex! At one point I spoke aloud: "...if only I knew Portuguese." Apparently he understood, for we both laughed strongly and firmly embraced each other; he was such a sweetie. Afterwards we sat and strangely communicated, for he had mentioned that he had to go and see a friend! I responded; he left! I hope he's still at Point: 202.

 

Another time I was in a bath house in Madrid; I just did not know what was happening when neither of us could orally communicate in a language which is understood by both. He wanted to do certain things, but I did not understand what he desired. I was at a complete loss as to what he wanted; I did some strange things. I laughed then; I lol today every time this experience resurrects itself mentally.

 

All in all, it would be wonderful if escorts knew minimum English, but I would not stay that it is a requisite. If one is up for the challenge, then what the hell?

[JamesK840]

>>Was Helen Keller or currently Ms Matlin dumb?

 

No, because they both learned to speak. My understanding of the description dumb was always 'unable to speak'. When I read what he wrote I winced, knowing that he may be in for it but hopping it would be allowed to pass. If he meant what I took him to mean then he may have more properly said deaf/mute, but deaf and dumb was in common usage for quite a while (especially before the deaf, or hearing impaired I suppose I should say, or maybe that should be hearing disadvantaged, started regularly being taught to speak).

 

I had a 'happy ending' massage by a deaf woman once (some ability to speak but nowhere near Ms. Matlin's level), the session was actually pretty good. Couldn't communicate during the session, but didn't need to. Better then the empty "you've got a nice cock" kind of crap. Using her whole body to massage, laying across and on top of me is something I wish the males I've been getting massages from lately knew about...

 

So as far as 'english for escorts' I don't *need* to be able to communicate during the session, but it sure would be nice to be able to during the setup... Guess that's one reason to use an agency in a foreign land, if you can find an honest one that isn't ripping one or both sides off and/or promising things the escort will not do.

[axebahia]

>"...with a deaf and dumb Eskimo." No, sir, it should have

>been written "...with a deaf Eskimo."

 

Shouldn't that be: "deaf and dumb, Inuit"?

[Guest Merlin]

I would not be detered from hiring and escort who did not speak English well. Having said that, I have in the past met several who could barely speak English, and it was not as enjoyable an experience as it otherwize would have been.

I hesitate to use the word "boy" either orally or in emails, because, if it were overheard or seen by someone outside the gay community, it could be taken to refer to underage boys. A lot of people think that all gays are interested in very young guys, and usuing that word can fan the fire--just my opinion.

[VaHawk]

>When I

>read what he wrote I winced, knowing that he may be in for it

>but hopping it would be allowed to pass. If he meant what I

>took him to mean then he may have more properly said

>deaf/mute, but deaf and dumb was in common usage for quite a

>while

 

And so was I, as we all know what he meant, and we all know there was nothing intentionally mean spirited or derogatory about his comments. This was a common term from years ago, and anyone over 40 knows that and knows that it refers to someone who is hearing impaired and unable to speak.

 

And as far as axe's comment about Inuit rather than Eskimo, everyone called them Eskimos years ago and nothing derogatory was meant.

 

Really, there are so many self-appointed "pc police" on this board! It seems that they dismiss the content of the message for the individual words and as such, they are the offensive ones.

[OneFinger]

I too chringed with the "deaf and dumb" reference. You're right, it was a common term that anyone over 40 has heard before and the guy probably meant no harm.

 

But, I've been a sign language interpreter for the deaf for over 30 years. To the deaf community being called "dumb" is equally as offensive as using the "N" word for blacks.

 

There are some words that just shouldn't be tolerated despite how innocently they are used. I don't consider the phrase "deaf and dumb" at all acceptable.

 

I too don't like all the "PC" correctness. But this phrase is way too offensive to be considered a "politically correct" issue.

[Trixie]

Truly, this whole thread is a perfect example of why one should try to be tolerant of those who have not learned english. Half the time we native speakers are at a loss as to which word to use!

Trix

[Guest]

>I just called an escort who avertised as fluent in Dutch and

>English but who could not converse over the phone in English.

> He then passed the phone to his "BF" to make the appointment.

> I politely declined. Do you expect minimum language skills

>from your escorts?

 

The issue for me wouldn't so much boil down to his language skills, but rather to a matter of trust. If he's willing to advertize with such an obvious bold-faced lie, he's likely to be dishonest and unreliable in other ways. There's no Better Business Bureau for escorts (I suppose this site is the closest thing), so any dealing with an escort has to involve a certain degree of trust. Will he do what he advertizes? Is his appearance what he advertizes? Are his pictures at least fairly recent? There are so many escorts out there. The biggest task I see in hiring one consists of trying to find out which ones I can trust enough to show me a good time...

[JamesK840]

Now I'm offended, as two posts in a row have implied I must be over 40!

 

Glad it didn't turn into the dogpile I was expecting, agree that the term should be phased out of common usage.

[VaHawk]

>Now I'm offended, as two posts in a row have implied I must

>be over 40!

 

 

 

:7 :7 :7 :7 Tsk, tsk, tsk. I do hope you aren't insulting those over 40! But, I really know you aren't! But in reality, there is nothing wrong with being any age as long as you are comfortable with being so.

[+ Charlie]

Well, I AM over 60, and in my day the common term was "deaf and dumb"--the word "dumb" referring not to intellect but to the ability to speak. I guess political corectness on this one has passed me by, so I apologize to anyone who was offended (I was raised to believe that "Negro" and "colored" were polite terms, and "queer" was offensive, and I have learned to adjust my language in those communities, but I have had little social contact with the hearing impaired). As for Inuit, the person in question was a Danish citizen from Greenland, and I'm not sure they use the same term as the Canadians--at the time the incident happened, more than 30 years ago, the common term still seemed to be Eskimo.