Dated not hired?

[Atlantagaguy]

I am in my mid fifties, recently I met a guy who is a mature 22 years old and we have been out several times. When I say mature I mean he doesn’t drink, he would rather go to a movie or play than to a bar. The Sex is amazing and he is easy to talk to and I am having a time of my life. My concern is I have never dating someone so young, 32 years difference. Have any of you dated someone this young and did it work out?

[+ Topseed]

Yes. No.

[GeorgeGG]

Yes.Yes. x4

[doya66]

No, but...

 

Yes.Yes. x4

 

If you are wondering whether this young man will marry you and be with you forever, nobody can ever know that. You click and have hit it off. Go for the ride. Don't get too serious too fast, but enjoy each other for the time you have together. If it ends, it ends- you've been through that before. It's no fun, but the future prospect of a bad ending should not interfere with the enjoyment of a relationship now (and not just the fantastic sex, either!). Don't write him off because of his age (that's not nice, as we over-40s know...). Maybe one day he will be no more than a pleasant memory, and maybe he'll be The One. You can't know at this point, so just sit back and enjoy the process of figuring it all out.

[+ purplekow]

Younger men are roller coaster rides. There is energy and movement and excitement, thrills, sudden drops and then return uphills that seem as though they will never end and then they do. At the end, you want to buy another ticket and go again. Enjoy the ride. Make sure to scream at the really exciting parts and at the end, make sure you have enough money for another ride. Did i mention that I hate you.

[GeorgeGG]

Younger men are roller coaster rides. There is energy and movement and excitement, thrills, sudden drops and then return uphills that seem as though they will never end and then they do. At the end, you want to buy another ticket and go again. Enjoy the ride. Make sure to scream at the really exciting parts and at the end, make sure you have enough money for another ride. Did i mention that I hate you.

 

i like the way you put it

[Atlantagaguy]

Younger men are roller coaster rides. There is energy and movement and excitement, thrills, sudden drops and then return uphills that seem as though they will never end and then they do. At the end, you want to buy another ticket and go again. Enjoy the ride. Make sure to scream at the really exciting parts and at the end, make sure you have enough money for another ride. Did i mention that I hate you.

lol, hate is a strong word! Thanks for the advice! The one thing I have discovered is he likes to sleep in. I have been up since 6:30 lol. By the way I love roller coasters! Hands up

[Diverdan]

Yes, and No it never became a life long situation for many, many reasons, but we both realized that from the very beginning. I still stay in touch with a couple of those guys and we have remained friends, but not "friends with benefits". One is now happily committed to someone his own age and if they lived in a state where marriage between the same sex was possible, they would be married. Enjoy your time together and I absolutely agree with what doya66 has said. And "I don't hate you" but rather am very happy for what you have.

[hornytwells]

yes, and it worked for about a year.

[+ Just Sayin]

When I was 57, I met a guy who was 28; he moved in with me 7 months later; we are still together and, I must admit, these are the best years of my life; despite all the concerns about the 29-year age difference, it has worked; if you want to spend the time with him, I'd recommend moving forward!!!

[jgoo]

No first hand experience but I can tell you about a good friend of mine who has had a successful relationship up to this point with a guy about 28 years his junior. It has been about 10 years so far that they have been together and all indications are that it is still going strong. I have talked to him about his relationship numerous times over the years, most recently this past summer. He has told me that he doesn't try to over analyze the relationship, why it is working and what the future will hold. They met at an event which was the basis of a common interest to start things off. He has indicated having similar interests (in their case the theater, certain charitable causes, travel and golf) is important but also having different interests and allowing the other to enjoy that with other friends is important too. He has indicated it is necessary not to be controlling or possessive, allowing freedom to do things with others and not always together.

 

There have been challenges along the way, mostly at significant events in their lives (like his partner's graduation from college/first job and my friend's retirement) which required some adjustments but things seemed to work out. Probably like most other types of relationships. The bigger challenges he said they faced was from other friends of my friend and from his partner's parents.

 

Early on it was established that there wasn't any monetary issues involved as they shared expenses on trips and dates (or one time he would pay and the next time his partner would pay).

 

I do think it takes two very unique type of people with complimentary personalities to make it work with such a large age difference. Before this, I would have never thought it could work but it is another example of never say never.

[citylaw1]

I am in my mid fifties, recently I met a guy who is a mature 22 years old and we have been out several times. When I say mature I mean he doesn’t drink, he would rather go to a movie or play than to a bar. The Sex is amazing and he is easy to talk to and I am having a time of my life. My concern is I have never dating someone so young, 32 years difference. Have any of you dated someone this young and did it work out?

 

A dream, but nice while it lasts.

[+ deej]

Younger men are roller coaster rides. There is energy and movement and excitement, thrills, sudden drops and then return uphills that seem as though they will never end and then they do. At the end, you want to buy another ticket and go again. Enjoy the ride. Make sure to scream at the really exciting parts and at the end, make sure you have enough money for another ride. Did i mention that I hate you.

 

I swear I was hearing Hooboy's voice as I read that! (That's a good thing, for those who need it explained.)

 

I do think it takes two very unique type of people with complimentary personalities to make it work

 

You could have stopped there. It takes effort to make any relationship work. Don't go looking for reasons to fuck it up. Remember, a large chunk of society doesn't think two men can have a relationship for ANY reason at ANY time.

[tyro]

Deej, I love you. A chunk of your post is going on a sticky as soon as I finish typing this.

T

[Irtwo]

When people hear about an older guy with a younger guy, they picture a young male model type with an out-of-shape older guy. In those caes, money usually is involved in some way. But in reality, with most of the older /younger couples I've seen, the younger guy is only average looking at best, and is just as lucky as the older guy is to have found someone. Age difference is not a big factor (as much as looks are).

[GeorgeGG]

When people hear about an older guy with a younger guy, they picture a young male model type with an out-of-shape older guy. In those caes, money usually is involved in some way. But in reality, with most of the older /younger couples I've seen, the younger guy is only average looking at best, and is just as lucky as the older guy is to have found someone. Age difference is not a big factor (as much as looks are).

 

i prefer the stereotype. who cares about a young average looking guy?

[briancalihc]

If you have a good arrangement in place, you will be fine. He doesn't love you for your money, he loves you because you make hime feel secure.

I was with a guy I originally hired as an escort for about 2 years. There was a 20 year difference between us and it was the best relationship I had ever been in. It ended rather abruptly and it had to do with money. I would suggest making sure you have a concrete arrangement in place as soon as possible, no matter how uncomfortable that conversation might be. I messed up by not setting an arrangement. When I abruptly ended the relationship I was mad at him because I was spending over 100k per year on him in money, helping with bills and gifts. As time went on after I ended the relationship, I realized it was my fault for always throwing money and gifts at him when all he really wanted was security. Now, after being through 5 different escorts and other arrangement seekers, I want him back, but he won't even speak to me. I know he's still single, he's doing alright financially, but could be doing better, and just as cute and smart as he was 2 years ago. But I destroyed his heart by removing his security blanket and it will take a lot to win his trust back.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

My college roommate was 20 years the junior in a partnership that lasted 15 years.

[Irtwo]

I was spending over 100k per year on him in money, helping with bills and gifts.

 

Wow! You are extremely generous.

[Lookin]

. . . I was spending over 100k per year on him in money, helping with bills and gifts.

 

 

Wow! You are extremely generous.

 

 

I'll say! Should you ever feel inclined to try the other side of the seesaw and help boost the security of a fairly winsome septuagenarian, please PM me! http://www.cysticus.de/naturheilkunde-forum/images/smiles/icon_blink.gif

[+ purplekow]

I'll say! Should you ever feel inclined to try the other side of the seesaw and help boost the security of a fairly winsome septuagenarian, please PM me! http://www.cysticus.de/naturheilkunde-forum/images/smiles/icon_blink.gif

Lookin I am afraid that this is a case of winsome lose some.

[wnybear]

Enjoy each others company and see where it leads to. There's no guarantee that things will work out no matter what the age difference is. If things work out and you stay together, that's great. If it doesn't last, well you both enjoyed your time with the other while it lasted.

 

Back in late August I was approached by a young man who was 30 years younger than me. He preferred older men, he wanted to date, his goal was a relationship with an older man. We chatted on line quite a bit and seemed to hit it off and we both wanted to meet each other. We did a simple coffee date, which did go well. We were both still interested in pursuing dating. We let each other know our expectations. I was very up front and gave him the opportunity to pass without worrying about "hurting my feelings." He said he wanted to try dating with me. He was just starting back to his last year of college. Between classes, part time job, and a weekend free lance job his time was really limited. For a couple of weeks he made a point of keeping in touch by texting, but that just happened less and after a couple of non-responses to my texts I decided to back off.

 

I look at the whole thing as if I didn't go out on the date with him then nothing definitely would have happened. We did go out that one time, had a good time. It could have went further, I did not know for sure at the time, but unfortunately did not. The same thing could have happened if I went out with a guy who was the same age as me. I think a lot of people say they want a relationship, but don't want to take the chance on one, they want a sure thing. At least they think they do.

[Lookin]

As some of you may have surmised, I myself have been in a May-December relationship of sorts for some time now. Well, actually more of a March-December relationship, but no need to dwell on these particulars for the nonce.

 

It began as a professional association with Heine, my driver and my personal assistant. Then, owing to several severe weather systems a few winters back, we remained sequestered in my modest chalet for a period of some months when we rarely saw another soul. Needless to say, we were in one another's company from dawn till dusk.

 

The subtle shift began during the night that a small avalanche of wet snow cascaded down just outside my bedroom window. It was enough to wake me and, in my surprise and confusion, I believe I let escape a refined gasp. When another minute or two passed, with no response to or relief of my anxiety, I let escape another, somewhat less refined, gasp.

 

That one did the trick, as soon Heine was at my bedroom door, asking if he could be of any assistance. He was wearing the striped blue smoking jacket over the pearl gray satin pajamas I had given him for Christmas and exuded just the attentive masculinity that was needed to sooth my tattered nerves.

 

Perhaps you could sit with me for a few moments, and we can think of a plan to remove the heap of snow which now blocks access to my bedroom garden and koi pond.

 

Let me have a look!, he said as he did so, and was soon back with the news that the snow was little more than a drift which could be removed first thing in the morning.

 

Still, I said demurely, it would be quite reassuring were you to stay here with me and help guard the rear premises until the light of day. I will make sure there's a bit extra in the cookie jar to show my appreciation for your extra trouble.

 

Sure thing, Your Grace! Do you mind if I keep warm under the covers while we wait?

 

And with that began an extension of our relationship that included the hours of dusk till dawn from then on.

 

Although I have little doubt that Heine is as genuinely committed to my well-being as I am to his, I have found it judicious to keep dropping a bit extra into the cookie jar to let him know how much I value his additional kindnesses. Though I would like to think, should my personal fortunes ever enter into a state of decline, that we would continue on supporting one another through the vicissitudes that life is sure to throw our way.

 

 

I would also like to think that Congress will one day soon turn its attention to the Business of the People, but that must be another thread for another day.

 

 

Aunt Fancy

[+ deej]

Lookin I am afraid that this is a case of winsome lose some.

 

Groan!

 

<chuckle>

[Phil_musc]

Aunt Fancy, you certainly have a cosmopolitan way with the words. I believe there is real truth lying there for those who will only use their eyes to see. You have written from your own experience and you have written well. Amen, my brother.

 

Actually, I've gone back and re-read your post and I can't tell you how sorry I am that you didn't call me during your hour of need. Had you called, I would have hopped into my Lamborghini (a trophy presented to me by one of my myriad admirers) post-haste and flew to your side - well at least to your modest chalet (I'm sure you're just being self-effacing with that description, but never mind. . .) I would have helped dig you out of the avalanche - seems such a small thing and I'm always willing to help a kindred spirit out. And of course now that I know about your Heine, well again let me just say in the words of Carole King, "You just call out my name and you know where ever I am I'll cum running (and let me tell you, to cum running at my time in life is no small thing. It's certainly not my way of choice for that sort of orgasmic thing). But enough about me, let's get back to the original poster's points - oh yeah, what were they again?