For those of us with wives...

[Mariner45]

I was a big pussy hound back in the day. Didn't start with men till I was 25 or so. Anyway, I'm 45 now. Married a woman 8 years my junior. We have a great relationship. But when I'm out of town for business, more and more I find that I want cock as a companion, not pussy. Now I'm almost exclusive. Naturally my sex drive with the wife went down. But naturally she found out.

But before she confronted me, one of my buddies informed me that she was fucking around with another guy. A college athlete. Apparently my wife is a cougar. So when the confrontation came, I had an ace up my sleeve.

After a period of seperation, we got together, talked it out, and decided we're not getting any younger and we should be allowed to fuck whoever we want. My wife brings home college men when I'm away (so jealous sometimes) and I hire men out of town on my own dime. We've never had a better marriage.

So other guys. Who's married? Keep it hidden? Any close calls or discoveries? Any one else have an open relationship?

And escorts who see this, just an estimation, how many of your clients are married men?

[SteveEscort]

And escorts who see this, just an estimation, how many of your clients are married men?

 

Around 90% I would think. I rarely see gay or bisexual single men who want fun. Nearly everyone I see is married and I prefer it that way. Married men make much better clients

[Mariner45]

Around 90% I would think. I rarely see gay or bisexual single men who want fun. Nearly everyone I see is married and I prefer it that way. Married men make much better clients

 

How do they make better clients? More discretion, more willing to pay up? lol.

[SteveEscort]

I don't know, they just do. I hate seeing openly gay men for appointments, they're just "difficult", I am sure many other escorts will agree.

 

For want of a better word (or words) "more appreciative of the service" is probably an accurate way to describe married clients. They seem to appreciate the service, me and the whole experience than men who just go out to bars and pick up men on demand.

[+ Lucky]

I was a big pussy hound back in the day. Didn't start with men till I was 25 or so. Anyway, I'm 45 now. Married a woman 8 years my junior. We have a great relationship. But when I'm out of town for business, more and more I find that I want cock as a companion, not pussy. Now I'm almost exclusive. Naturally my sex drive with the wife went down. But naturally she found out.

But before she confronted me, one of my buddies informed me that she was fucking around with another guy. A college athlete. Apparently my wife is a cougar. So when the confrontation came, I had an ace up my sleeve.

After a period of seperation, we got together, talked it out, and decided we're not getting any younger and we should be allowed to fuck whoever we want. My wife brings home college men when I'm away (so jealous sometimes) and I hire men out of town on my own dime. We've never had a better marriage.

So other guys. Who's married? Keep it hidden? Any close calls or discoveries? Any one else have an open relationship?

And escorts who see this, just an estimation, how many of your clients are married men?

 

So, your wife gets cute College guys for free, you have to pay?

[+ Lucky]

I don't know, they just do. I hate seeing openly gay men for appointments, they're just "difficult", I am sure many other escorts will agree.

 

For want of a better word (or words) "more appreciative of the service" is probably an accurate way to describe married clients. They seem to appreciate the service, me and the whole experience than men who just go out to bars and pick up men on demand.

 

Wow! What balls to come on a site where gay men talk about escorts and denigrate them. I can be sure never to hire you!

[bigvalboy]

I don't know, they just do. I hate seeing openly gay men for appointments, they're just "difficult", I am sure many other escorts will agree.

 

For want of a better word (or words) "more appreciative of the service" is probably an accurate way to describe married clients. They seem to appreciate the service, me and the whole experience than men who just go out to bars and pick up men on demand.

 

What an insulting thing to say. This is absolute utter nonsense. I can't imagine anyone appreciating you with an attitude like that. Best you stick to your closeted straight, married, supposedly gay men. Well as Lucky says, it took a lot of balls to say it.

[nate_sf]

I don't know, they just do. I hate seeing openly gay men for appointments, they're just "difficult", I am sure many other escorts will agree.

 

For want of a better word (or words) "more appreciative of the service" is probably an accurate way to describe married clients. They seem to appreciate the service, me and the whole experience than men who just go out to bars and pick up men on demand.

 

While I agree with many things Steve has to say and generally enjoy his posts, I do not agree with this statement at all. Of the other escorts I know, I doubt they would agree with this either.

 

What Steve may have been getting at (and I’m just guessing here), is that when someone steps out of their relationship to meet an escort, they may be especially excited and motivated. It is something different than what they have going on at home. However, I’ve mentioned previously in other threads, I find this to be true of escort appointments in general, as compared to random hookups. When someone makes an appointment to see an escort it’s often a special occasion and represents a deliberate, motivated action. That motivation and sense that it is something special leads to hot, engaging fun that in my opinion is usually hotter than the random hookup. I find this with the partnered and single clients alike.

 

But back to the OP, I’ve never polled my clients but I believe a large number of them are partnered in one way or another. Of those, most are partnered with other men. However, a significant number of clients have had wives at some point in their lives. Some are divorced or widowed, others are in the process of separation. Many have children. I’d expect there are some that have an understanding like what the OP describes, or a variation of that.

[Phil_musc]

Some of you seem a little touchy with what Steve wrote about openly gay men vs. married men as clients. I think he may well be right - at least partially. Married guys are going to be more appreciative and probably psychologically more "up" for the experience. It is a departure from their norm. That very likely translates into being a more focused and hotter session. Then too, Steve is in Britain and not in a particularly large city (I think) - the smaller town mores and baggage are probably a part of his reality. But I too was bothered by the "hate to see openly gay men for appointments." Maybe that's just hyperbole. Money is money and business is business. We should all just take a chill pill and relax. Besides, all that finger-pointing is just too much work. Then too, Steve has been a valued and interesting poster here. A little slack, gentlemen, if you please.

[SteveEscort]

I stand by my post

 

Very few openly gay men book escorts

 

I am not put off by the trolls on here who want to slag me off.

 

Oh and for the record, yes make sure you don't hire me if you feel I am not worthy of my own opinion.

 

Some of my worst experiences in this work have been with gay men. Size queens, bitchy queens etc. Married men are not like that

 

IMHO openly gay men are difficult clients and I do hate to see them. If you don't like that statement then the problem lies with you, not me. I didn't say I didn't see them nor did I say I was difficult with them. I give them everything they ask but they've been difficult with me in the past.

 

I don't like cross dressers, men with cheese on their cock or guys who tie you up. That doesn't make me a bad person but saying I prefer not to see openly gay men does. Grow up girls

 

The reaction re-affirmed why I don't like to see openly gay men. They're hysterical at times and love drama

[jimboivyo]

was married. paid a ton to get rid of the problem. happier now and even more happy there weren't kids involved.

[SteveEscort]

Then too, Steve is in Britain and not in a particularly large city (I think) -

 

The population of the city and metropolitan area (20 mile radius) is 879,996

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyneside

[Phil_musc]

The population of the city and metropolitan area (20 mile radius) is 879,996

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyneside

 

Oops - please forgive my ignorance of the population of the city in question. But the size of the city or town is no guarantee either that the mores will be like those of, say, London.

 

I think I totally get your position, anyway, Steve, and no foul here for me. Best regards.

[SteveEscort]

That's ok. I live in the 6th most populated area of the country.

 

I'm sure ill now be the only escort with this opinion because no one else will want to offend anyone now and isn't its wrong that clients can offend us but by god we put one step out of place and were vermin lol

[Mariner45]

So, your wife gets cute College guys for free, you have to pay?

 

May not seem that fair but I can always count on getting lucky and she has to hope her targets are into older women.

[BaronArtz]

Not in defense of anybody in particular, but I would think that married/partnered men (gay or straight) are less 'clingy'. They have a wife or partner to get home to during evenings and weekends. So yes, theirs is probably a more focussed and business-like session with an escort, with no risk of developing into an emotional relationship. Fuck, pay, leave.

[TUOT89]

Oh and for the record, yes make sure you don't hire me if you feel I am not worthy of my own opinion.

 

Boy, you really don't understand gay men at all. Your opinion is no hindrance to sex and no invitation to drama. If you had the body of Zeb Atlas or Vin Marco, you could be an anti-semite and gay men would overlook your opinions and still want to have sex with you. If gay men are "difficult" as you say, it could be because they know better. (For the record, neither Zeb nor Vin is an anti-semite.)

[SteveEscort]

Boy, you really don't understand gay men at all.

 

Oh dear, well I've been one for a long time.

 

I'll bow out of this one gracefully because I can't win no matter what I put. But I do stand by my post and if you don't like that well............ there's always another person on another day for y'all to pick on

[Michael Wayne]

calm down guys!!! to answer the op: 75% of my clients are CURRENTLY married men with kids/grandkids. 10% are divorced men. 10% are openly gay men and the other 5% are a various assortment of couples of all kinds with a small fraction of female clients (1% maybe) My GAY clients are a real JOY and PLEASURE for me. My experience has not been Steves' (although I think steve is entitled to express his experiences). My married clients are my bread and butter. The key there is to RESPECT THEIR LIMITS. Some dont kiss wheras I LOVE to kiss. Some only like to suck me or get sucked or even just get a massage meaning I dont get to top some of them (which is frustrating because topping is what I do best). I try to get them to relax and be at ease and my new slogan: "I am not about the CLOCK, I am about the COCK," tends to do that! lol http://www.rentmen.com/mikeyusatop

[+ Lucky]

Everyday when I see this thread, I think "There but for the grace of God..." I dated a woman for 5 years and we were sure that we would get married. But in the nick of time I wised up that I was in love with my (straight) roommate and could never feel for a woman what I felt for him. So I broke up. Boy, was she pissed. But it was the right thing for both of us.

To be married to a woman and gay presents challenges that must be difficult, at least until you can work them out. Some wives are understanding, some never learn the truth. That part bothers me because I feel one has to be honest with a partner. I once sat next to two older men at the Gaiety, talking about how they deceived their wives. One man, in his seventies, bragged "She never knew." Or at least that's what he thought.

But, it's not my life, and it's not my choices that are relevant to this topic. Good luck to all married gay men..and I do mean married to a woman.

[NYTomcat]

Could not pass this one up as I have now been both. Good for you Steve expressing your opinion its something few escorts feel free to do. That said. I do see what you mean. Married I always was more excited. I lived for my escapes while I still do a bit its different as an out gay man with grindr and growlr and the like. Its less a fantasy and more just a fun time. In any event to the op good for you finding balance. I didn't but divorce helped. Plus its been 15 months with the right partner now so I've found what I was missing . Still I think he and I will hire in the future at some point together. Once again creating the fun fantasy and escape from the norm. I wonder Steve if you find gay couples more fun.

[+ FreshFluff]

I was a big pussy hound back in the day. Didn't start with men till I was 25 or so. Anyway, I'm 45 now. Married a woman 8 years my junior. We have a great relationship. But when I'm out of town for business, more and more I find that I want cock as a companion, not pussy. Now I'm almost exclusive. Naturally my sex drive with the wife went down. But naturally she found out.

But before she confronted me, one of my buddies informed me that she was fucking around with another guy. A college athlete. Apparently my wife is a cougar. So when the confrontation came, I had an ace up my sleeve.

After a period of seperation, we got together, talked it out, and decided we're not getting any younger and we should be allowed to fuck whoever we want. My wife brings home college men when I'm away (so jealous sometimes) and I hire men out of town on my own dime. We've never had a better marriage.

So other guys. Who's married? Keep it hidden? Any close calls or discoveries? Any one else have an open relationship?

And escorts who see this, just an estimation, how many of your clients are married men?

 

Did you enjoy being with these women or was it mostly about the thrill of the chase? I thought that men were pretty set in their orientations, whether gay, straight or bi.

 

Glad you guys have found an arrangement that works, though I've never understood the cougar thing myself. I've been dating older men since college.

[leigh.bess.toad]

I didn't but divorce helped. Plus its been 15 months with the right partner now so I've found what I was missing . Still I think he and I will hire in the future at some point together.

 

TC - yes you did find the right partner. As did I. We both got partners who were far better than either of us deserve

 

Like TC I was married. Unlike TC, I still am. And I spend a few nights a week with my partner, and a couple of nights a week with my wife. She knows I am gay and we haven't been intimate in years. She has actually met my partner (and his former partner as well). And most of my escorts have met him (5 of them so far have met him) as well as a few client friends from the forum.

 

To the OP, I'm glad that you can now be open with your wife and have worked out an arrangement for you. As you can see, there are different arrangements that work. What form the arrangement takes, it all depends on the couple involved.

[Walker1]

In days gone by, this was the norm. People had things on the side-male or female. Today's world of soulmates and "The One" have made marraige into some idealized Disney experience/expectations.

[+ FreshFluff]

In days gone by, this was the norm. People had things on the side-male or female. Today's world of soulmates and "The One" have made marraige into some idealized Disney experience/expectations.

 

I don't know that people cheat less than they used to. If things have changed, it's because of changes in mores, some good (being gay is more accepted than before) and some mixed (divorce is no longer taboo).

 

While this wasn't the OP's situation, both parties suffer when gay men marry women--or for that matter, when anyone marries someone s/he doesn't love, expecting to cheat with others.