Occupational Hazards...

[Glenn1441]

Naturally, many escorts are plagued by men who text or call repeatedly, yet have no intention of hiring. I can imagine how frustrating that must be... and, to an extent, costly, as depending on one's phone plan (not everyone has unlimited plans), the constant communication, especially texts, can add up.

However, there are clients, such as me, who travel quite a bit for work, and, rarely being able to hire on-the-spot, need to make an appointment. Additionally, I do like to have a moment on the phone whereby I can determine whether or not the escort is interested in accommodating my requests, etc.

That said, it has been quite a month for me when contacting NYC-based (or visiting) escorts. Many of the men I contacted simply would not give me the time of day if I were not hiring for that moment. Never mind a quick discussion as to sexual compatibility. When they discovered I was looking to make an appointment for a few days later, they each exclaimed -- 'Call me when you're ready.' And then, they hung up on me.

Most jobs have their own 'occupational hazards.' We all must do things we do not wish to do in order to keep our jobs, or, keep the workday flowing smoothly. Unfortunately for escorts, the hazard often means contact with flakes. However, a potential, first-time client's need for an appointment, and a polite 5-min discussion regarding sexual interests is not uncommon, nor is it outrageous.

A phone conversation, text message or e-mail communication can reveal a great deal about an escort. There are more than 500 active escorts in the NYC area -- Rentboy isn't the only site in the business. But good, reliable, sane clients are few and far between. Rough economy, and yet there are those of us who can afford escort services or who set aside funds for hiring as a treat to oneself.

I would think that most escorts can determine, rather quickly, if a potential client is merely a pest getting his kicks vicariously, or if he is legitimate. That said, it is utterly foolish to treat a first-time caller rudely simply because the escort fears his time might be wasted. And I have reason to believe that the rudeness and unwillingness to discuss session details, or set an appointment with a potential client, may come from a particular escort's desperation for cash, and thus, demand for 'right now' sessions. Still, same thing applies -- rudeness of any sort is foolish, because if one is broke one day, broke another day is not out of the question. No shame in being broke. But shame on an escort who treats a potential first time client rudely without provocation.

[MichiganMan]

AMEN! I couldn't agree more. Bank in January I had a trip to NYC and wanted to hire someone for an overnight. Even at $1500 NO ONE was willing to travel to my hotel near LaGuardia. I ended up changing my hotel and hiring through an agency (Oscar from Maximum) for an hour....I'm headed to Toronto in two weeks....let the games begin!!

[down_to_business]

In general terms this board is very anti-client and you aren't likely to get much sympathy. Whether its true or not, it can seem like escorts can do no wrong and clients can do no right sometimes. What you consider good customer service, some of these service providers think is wasting their time. Questions about sexual intimacy etc. (as important as it might be) are not likely to be welcomed over the phone by many providers period and with the fear of legal entrapment, understandably.

 

My take on this is to attribute at least some of it to generational differences. Again, in general terms only (there are exceptions to all of this) the younger escorts where brought up with different norms and values like texting to the person sitting next to them instead of talking. We could get into the psychology of this some other time. Try an escort who is a little closer to your own age and you might find an escort more likely to have similar norms to you and hence a more pleasant hiring experience. I doubt anyone is purposely trying to be rude to you and what you consider rude is probably what they consider being direct. While you are ready to plan days in advance, they may not know what hours they want to work until hours before.

[Diverdan]

You are right on, downtobusiness... there are some huge generational differences. But, I would rather have someone hang up on me before I hire than to have a rude or negative encounter. If I am traveling, I do like to book in advance, and so far have had mostly good experiences, but am thankful that those who have hung up or have given me bad vibes have just saved me a lot of time, trouble, money and a negative experience. The good ones make up for that! Not much difference here than in the general service business... good customer service is becoming a rare commodity no matter what the profession/industry.

[jgoo]

I agree with dtb and diverdan. I learn a lot about the type of escort in their early communications with me. Sometimes there is that certain something that is hard to define (and other times very easy to define) that indicates things aren't meant to be or quite the contrary. I take each situation on its own merits and like diverdan am thankful when I find out before spending any money.

 

The review site and forum have been helpful but there aren't any guarantees of a positive customer service experience. Recently I've had a couple negative experiences with initial communications from well reviewed and regarded guys but I have also had an extremely outstanding experience as well with another escort. In many ways it is a crap shoot and when there seems to be a run of bad luck, it can become quite discouraging.

[MiamiLooker]

Naturally, many escorts are plagued by men who text or call repeatedly, yet have no intention of hiring. I can imagine how frustrating that must be... and, to an extent, costly, as depending on one's phone plan (not everyone has unlimited plans), the constant communication, especially texts, can add up.

However, there are clients, such as me, who travel quite a bit for work, and, rarely being able to hire on-the-spot, need to make an appointment. Additionally, I do like to have a moment on the phone whereby I can determine whether or not the escort is interested in accommodating my requests, etc.

That said, it has been quite a month for me when contacting NYC-based (or visiting) escorts. Many of the men I contacted simply would not give me the time of day if I were not hiring for that moment. Never mind a quick discussion as to sexual compatibility. When they discovered I was looking to make an appointment for a few days later, they each exclaimed -- 'Call me when you're ready.' And then, they hung up on me.

Most jobs have their own 'occupational hazards.' We all must do things we do not wish to do in order to keep our jobs, or, keep the workday flowing smoothly. Unfortunately for escorts, the hazard often means contact with flakes. However, a potential, first-time client's need for an appointment, and a polite 5-min discussion regarding sexual interests is not uncommon, nor is it outrageous.

A phone conversation, text message or e-mail communication can reveal a great deal about an escort. There are more than 500 active escorts in the NYC area -- Rentboy isn't the only site in the business. But good, reliable, sane clients are few and far between. Rough economy, and yet there are those of us who can afford escort services or who set aside funds for hiring as a treat to oneself.

I would think that most escorts can determine, rather quickly, if a potential client is merely a pest getting his kicks vicariously, or if he is legitimate. That said, it is utterly foolish to treat a first-time caller rudely simply because the escort fears his time might be wasted. And I have reason to believe that the rudeness and unwillingness to discuss session details, or set an appointment with a potential client, may come from a particular escort's desperation for cash, and thus, demand for 'right now' sessions. Still, same thing applies -- rudeness of any sort is foolish, because if one is broke one day, broke another day is not out of the question. No shame in being broke. But shame on an escort who treats a potential first time client rudely without provocation.

 

Maybe consider making your initial contact via email rather than by phone. You should be able to word your email such that you describe what you’re into without specifically asking for sex for pay. Provide some information about yourself, when you’re looking for, where you’ll be staying, etc. Keep in mind, the escort doesn’t know you, so you need to provide enough information to give him the comfort level that you’re serious. I don’t think you can assume “that most escorts can determine, rather quickly, if a potential client is merely a pest getting his kicks vicariously, or if he is legitimate.”

[Kevin Slater]

good, reliable, sane clients are few and far between.

 

Do you have any basis for this statement, other than your own assumptions? That's certainly not my experience, nor that of my friends in the biz. NYC is blessed with an abundance of good, reliable, sane clients as well as good, reliable, sane escorts. Mozel tov.

 

And I have reason to believe that the rudeness and unwillingness to discuss session details, or set an appointment with a potential client, may come from a particular escort's desperation for cash

 

Wow. And what is that reason, other than (again) your assumptions? Seven years of escorting in NYC and a familiarity with many other escorts in the city suggests to me otherwise, but please do educate me. Has it ever occurred to you that there is an abundance of pleasant, well informed clients who have read the escort's ad and reviews before calling and the escort is eager to answer their calls with specific questions rather than spend a taxing five minutes trying to vet the seriousness of a caller who clearly has a low opinion of them qua their profession?

 

rudeness of any sort is foolish

 

Agreed. And that's a two-way street.

 

Kevin Slater

[Nvr2Thick]

I believe that you're right that some escorts can become jaded, and that customer service goes out the window -- if a guy ever had it in the first place. I'd have to assume that either these guys are getting the business they need with repeat customers and with guys who are ready now, or they aren't going to last.

 

Having got to know a couple of escorts pretty well I can sympathize though. One guy who was on the fringes -- not even a b-list escort in LA said he could get 20 calls in a day. It isn't just the five minutes it takes to have the call, it's fitting that into his life. If he was with friends or in public or working his day job he'd have to either have an awkward call where he responded to detailed questions with enough ambiguity to not put too much out there for the folks around him, or he'd have to break away and talk in private. Depending on how an escort lives his life he could only do that so many times in a day.

 

I remember this particular escort telling me that he first thought that the guys who called a couple of times and/or who dragged out the calls with more and more questions were just looking for phone thrills or j/o material. He admitted that some of the callers who had a zillion questions or called over and over as if it were their first time asking for information became very good clients. Sometimes he was dealing with a flake, and sometimes it was a potential client who was unsure about taking the plunge, and who was trying to hook up with an escort who made him comfortable. This escort in LA said that if he got a call in the evening when he was home alone and not busy he would talk for as long as he was free, and that he ended up with some repeat and high-dollar clients he might have written off as flakes.

 

Some escorts just aren't going to talk to you. I have, however, had success from time to time asking if I might call back when an escort had time to talk privately.

[ncc1701d]

I agree with dtb and diverdan. I learn a lot about the type of escort in their early communications with me. Sometimes there is that certain something that is hard to define (and other times very easy to define) that indicates things aren't meant to be or quite the contrary. I take each situation on its own merits and like diverdan am thankful when I find out before spending any money.

 

The review site and forum have been helpful but there aren't any guarantees of a positive customer service experience. Recently I've had a couple negative experiences with initial communications from well reviewed and regarded guys but I have also had an extremely outstanding experience as well with another escort. In many ways it is a crap shoot and when there seems to be a run of bad luck, it can become quite discouraging.

 

I like planning ahead, and fortunately haven't met too many of the escorts described here. Most of the ones I've contacted have been actually happy to book well in advance, with the proviso that I confirm with them as the date gets closer, which is usually when hotel location/time/phone number gets exchanged. But priot to that, we've already discussed what I'm looking for and whether we are compatible. Thru those emails I can usually guage what type of customer service (not 100%) will be provided. Sorry to hear about your bad experience, but as DD pointed out, I rather know now. Of course, I've also had my share of escorts who wouldn't even respond to such a request to boo ahead.

[bigvalboy]

rudeness of any sort is foolish, because if one is broke one day, broke another day is not out of the question. No shame in being broke. But shame on an escort who treats a potential first time client rudely without provocation.

 

Or treats any client, first time or otherwise, with rudeness without provocation.

[Marc Dylan]

Unprovoked rudness on either side is uncalled for. I think the statement about "no shame in being broke " is a bit demeaning , if the person did not know the escort personally, then he is just assuming the escort is broke because of his profession. Many escorts are no where close to broke , and for some its just extra income , albeit a very healthy extra income . I think if someone puts an ad up they should expect quite a few phone calls, texts, and emails , answer them as promptly as possible and be happy that someone is showing interest, afterall its very flattering when you think about it. I personally always reply in a similar tone to which i was contacted. Friendly inquiry = friendly response , when someones first email is "rate ?" or "Horny?" I simply reply well hello to you too. If an escort does not reply move on to the next one, there are plenty of nice responsive guys out there.

[nate_sf]

Sorry you've had such bad luck with escorts in NYC. I know just a few there, and like Kevin's experience they're all good guys and understand customer service. But like you say there are hundreds of guys in the city, and sounds like the guys you've tried to get in touch with have been short on interpersonal sills.

 

I'd suggest you post a thread here in the Deli describing what kind of guy you're looking for, and that you want him to be responsive to communication. There are a lot of guys here who are in of visit NYC so I'm sure you can get some good recommendations. Like jgoo says it's not totally fail-safe but should help.

 

Then when making contact send a simple email or text just asking for availability for date and approx time. If he responds say you want to talk to him on the phone and ask when's a good time to call. If he's not amenable move on.

 

You could also try your luck at calling last minute, if that's the preference of the guys you're interested in. Last time I was in NY I wanted a massage at the last minute and was able to find someone easily enough within an hour of contact.

[Marc Dylan]

Sorry you've had such bad luck with escorts in NYC. I know just a few there, and like Kevin's experience they're all good guys and understand customer service. But like you say there are hundreds of guys in the city, and sounds like the guys you've tried to get in touch with have been short on interpersonal sills.

 

I'd suggest you post a thread here in the Deli describing what kind of guy you're looking for, and that you want him to be responsive to communication. There are a lot of guys here who are in of visit NYC so I'm sure you can get some good recommendations. Like jgoo says it's not totally fail-safe but should help.

 

Then when making contact send a simple email or text just asking for availability for date and approx time. If he responds say you want to talk to him on the phone and ask when's a good time to call. If he's not amenable move on.

 

You could also try your luck at calling last minute, if that's the preference of the guys you're interested in. Last time I was in NY I wanted a massage at the last minute and was able to find someone early enough within an hour of contact.

 

You hire guys for massages to? Its a guilty pleasure of mine and they are usually better than the spa. ive had some great ones in NYC also LA .

[nate_sf]

You hire guys for massages to? Its a guilty pleasure of mine and they are usually better than the spa. ive had some great ones in NYC also LA .

 

Yes guilty (or not - screw guilt!) pleasure of mine too. I love the mutual interaction of an escort appointment, but sometimes I just want to be taken care of. Also I tend to go with skilled masseurs who will be effective at stretches and working out knots, as well as just making me feel good and energized.

 

The time in NYC I'm thinking of was last summer. I'd flown cross-country and just checked into my hotel on a Friday evening, with no appointment with clients booked for the evening. Feeling very tired but also a bit amped up and thought a massage would feel good. I found, I think, four different guys on masseurfinder I was interested in and contacted all of them hoping that maybe one would be available. Three were well-known guys who'd I'd hoped to have the chance to meet someday, the other was an unknown but sexy guy. I didn't say much of anything in the contact, just a simple "would you be available for a 90 min appointment tonight?" Within and hour or so three out of the four texted back that they were available. Then I felt bad because I had to choose! I ended up going to see the unknown guy, and left feeling like a million bucks, rested and energized to see my own client the next day.

 

So to go back to the Original Post (OP) in this thread, if scheduling in advance is not working, try the last-minute approach. As long as you're flexible with who you end up seeing, you may be surprised you can find a guy you like relatively quickly and easily.

[operalover21]

In general terms this board is very anti-client and you aren't likely to get much sympathy. Whether its true or not, it can seem like escorts can do no wrong and clients can do no right sometimes. What you consider good customer service, some of these service providers think is wasting their time. Questions about sexual intimacy etc. (as important as it might be) are not likely to be welcomed over the phone by many providers period and with the fear of legal entrapment, understandably.

 

My take on this is to attribute at least some of it to generational differences. Again, in general terms only (there are exceptions to all of this) the younger escorts where brought up with different norms and values like texting to the person sitting next to them instead of talking. We could get into the psychology of this some other time. Try an escort who is a little closer to your own age and you might find an escort more likely to have similar norms to you and hence a more pleasant hiring experience. I doubt anyone is purposely trying to be rude to you and what you consider rude is probably what they consider being direct. While you are ready to plan days in advance, they may not know what hours they want to work until hours before.

 

This board is "anti-client?" Where are you getting that from? I've been posting for years and I'm a client and I have never felt any overwhelming "anti-client" bias on this board. Can you provide some concrete examples that support your contention?

[buckguy]

There's enough bitching about escorts here that I don't theink the Board is anti-client and I haven't seen any response to requests that the OP support that assertion. As for offering an overnight at LGA with a stranger....if you live in some carbound sprawlburg that might not seem unreasonable but for someone in Manhattan or very closeby who doesn't own a car, it's a different story. It means being in a semi-sketchy neighborhood where the stranger may turn out to be a less than credible person and removal of oneself is not as easy as walking out the door and down the street and going into the subway or quickly hailing a cab.

 

I don't think the issue with younger guys is "generational", it's that they are young and have never run a business before. It was was either John Preston or the Vegas escort who self published who made this observation about 20 years ago.