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Social vs. Full Service rates


rguer
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A question for those of you who charge different rates for social time vs full escort service rates:

 

- What's the rate differential?

 

- What kind of discount do you give for multiple hours?

 

I realize that some escorts don't have these different rates.

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Hey my man,

 

I don't want to highjack your thread and I hope you get many responses to your query. I just wanted to say that I found it really curious the way you phrased your question and how the message it conveys is very imprecise, at least in the way I see my work.

 

You make the difference between a social rate and a full escort service rate. When I read this, I immediately feel as if you think that being social with a client in a non sexual way is in some way not a fully realized service; it makes me feel as if in your mind hanging out with an escort is lacking something, is not the whole meal deal, is not what an escort is about. I can't help but thinking about making a comparison between a parked car rate against an actual travel from point A to point B car rate.

 

I might be being picky with language but I know as a fact that many men hire escorts for purposes that have nothing to do with sex. Sex is just another tool that a good escort will use while spending time with his client in order to fulfill the client's needs. (Yes, I am assuming that when you say "full escort services rates" you are implying an actual pork, please correct me if I am wrong.)

 

I just wanted to chime in because I know that many men who hire escorts for non-sexual purposes come here and read this message board and I think they should be represented or at least addressed. I find it strange that the people who post here are in the majority part of the group that see escorts as sex providers. I just want to say to all of you, silent, reserved, wonderful men out there that you are not an oddity; if you are looking for an intelligent, sexy, well educated man with whom you can learn about the art of intimacy in many ways, which may or may not include sex, you can trust a good escort to help you with that.

 

You don't have to have sex if you hire an escort. Sometimes a session in which you sit together and touch each other's hands can be intensely full, deeply fulfilling if that is all you are ready to do at the time.

 

A full session is a session in which the needs were understood and fulfilled.

 

Sorry to go off topic, I am off my sandbox. =)

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A question for those of you who charge different rates for social time vs full escort service rates:

 

- What's the rate differential?

 

- What kind of discount do you give for multiple hours?

 

I realize that some escorts don't have these different rates.

 

I am a little flexible when it comes to questions like this, and I'm going to combine what you and Juan both said and chime in with: sometimes this comes across as the client is trying to be cheap, especially since "social time" often has a funny way of ending up in the sack.

 

I think the best way to approach it is to use the more expensive event as the base event, set an appointment around that and then figure out your social time from there (e.g. I would like to hire you for some escorting fun—say, 1 hour, and then go to dinner for another hour or two. How much?)

 

I have had potential clients in the past try to tell me how ridiculous it would be for me to price "social time," since they're already paying for taking me to dinner, theatre, whatever. And my response has almost always been: "Thank you for the invitation then. I'm afraid I've already got plans for the evening."

 

As far as discounts for multiple hours, that depends on a number of factors ranging from how much time they want to how much fun I think they'll be.

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Yes, you're right, my question was a bit vague. I wasn't sure exactly how to phrase it, and I didn't want to post a long-winded explanation of the background. But I guess I'll have to.

 

In short: I'm negotiating my second hire. Guy seems nice, we have some common interests, I hope this will work because if it does it could turn into multiple hires. Here's our last email exchange (first part is him, second part in italics is my earlier message to him:

 

=====

Hi RGuer;

 

Is everything ok with me; I will leave it up to you; the donation you think is fair will be ok with me.

 

Sent from my iPhone

 

On May 19, 2012, at 9:35 PM, RGuer <rguer@operamail.com> wrote:

 

Hi,

 

I don't think we established a fee for Monday evening. Let's say 1.5 hours for dinner, 1.5 hours for play, .5 hours getting to and from restaurant, and .5 hours for miscellaneous delays. Might take more or less time for travel and food, depending on where we go and the speed of the service. Life is full of unknowns. I'm think 6pm-10pm unless that's too early for you to eat.

=====

 

He had earlier said that he's open to a social rate and a multiple hour rate - we just haven't established what those rates are.

 

Here's the distinction I'm drawing, no matter how poorly I'm drawing it: "Social rate" time is time spent doing something he might be doing anyway, like eating or seeing a play, except he's with me and I'm paying for it, and it might be better food or a more expensive seat than he would choose for himself. "Full Service" time is anything else; for example, he wouldn't ordinarily be hanging out with me in the park holding hands, so that's full service, even though there's no sex involved.

 

I do know the maximum I should pay, which is his full rate for 4 hours. But my impression from reading messages on the forum, and rates shown in ads, is that paying the first hour rate for hours 2-4 is not common.

 

Yeah, trying to minimize expenditures while also not looking cheap is difficult. I'm not made of money, unfortunately, and I'd rather save the money to put towards the next visit (assuming, of course, that there is one).

 

By the way, he's a part time escort but not new in the business. I'm not sure why he won't give me a fixed price. Perhaps he's trying not to think of himself as a sex worker, hence the use of the word "donation". We'll have to discuss that.

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It is more likely he doesn't want anything in writing where he states a separate rate for "Social" time and one for what could be interpreted legally as a "Sex" rate. Not to put to fine a point on it, he would then be agreeing to have sex for money.

 

Come up with the amount you find reasonable to pay him for his total amount of time and make an offer that way. Or negotiate a lower hourly rate for the entire time and don't base it on what activities you will be doing in that time, just one flat hourly rate.

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I've always found that there is a discount when booking an evening, versus 4 hours separately. An evening appointment would include "social" or dinner, etc. When it comes to travel, I've ALWAYS received a substantial discount, often times $500 for 24 hours, or even less. Usually my travel with an escort involves desirable destinations, luxury hotels, excursions, etc. On an extended vacation I am very clear that there will be a 4-5 hour block every afternoon for the escort to do as he pleases, short of hooking up with others, as well as reasonable sexual encounters. My trips are always set up as mutual vacations, and follow the pattern of a typical couple's vacation. If this suits you, you might try this approach. If you are flying an escort to Maui, staying at the Four Seasons, planning on scuba diving or the like, etc., you will most certainly find flexibility. I find this especially true once I make clear that I don't intend to fuck and suck all day in the room, and I expect the escort to enjoy his time as well as the resort amenities. I paid 2k for my last trip to Maui for a week.

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I think the approach to take here is to look at the entire evening as a whole package and not try to dice up the time between intimate and social time. I think it's good that you've outlined a general timeline that gives the escort an idea of what the general expectations are, but I would not try to break it down into individual budget items.

 

Most escorts I know (including myself) have lower rates for multi-hour appointments. I think the built-in assumption is that some of that time will be social time. For example, if someone is offering a 4- or 5-hour evening rate, they are probably assuming it will not be five hours of non-stop play. There will be a dinner or some kind of social event in there somewhere, together with the playtime. Same with overnights - this has been discussed elsewhere on the forum that an aspect of an overnight is "paying for someone to sleep" but then the hourly rate built into the overnight is typically lower than the escort's base hourly rate. I've heard escorts say that if the expectation is that they will be awake and active all night long, they may raise their overnight rate to account for that. So I think the social rate is built into the longer appointments, whereas the shorter appointments are usually focused more directly on play.

 

What is the guy's base hourly rate? We could give you some more specific suggestions for that 4-hour appointment with that info. From my perspective, my base rate is $200 for the first hour, but I have a standard 5-hour evening rate of $500 which works out to an average of $100/hour over the evening. I think this percentage of discounts is comparable with other guys I've seen, though some have higher base rates so their evening rate may be a bit higher too. However, depending on where you're located his base rate might be a bit lower so you can work with that. From the email excerpt you've provided it sounds like the guy is flexible and probably agreeable to what you suggest, so I'd offer him a lump sum that accounts for the whole timeframe that you think is fair to both of you.

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I gave him a time breakdown of what I thought we would be doing, but I thought I was asking him for a total fee, not a breakdown into two different rates. I should have worded it better.

 

His base outcall rate is $160/hr, incall is $140/hr. Using your rates of $200 for one hour and $500 for 5 hours, a reasonable fee for him would be $400 for 5 hours, so a bit less for 4 hours. I should offer around $350.

 

Golly, I am starting to sound cheap and analytical, aren't I? $350 and give him a $100 tip if he's not a clockwatcher sounds good.

 

Thanks for your feedback.

*

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Most escorts I know (including myself) have lower rates for multi-hour appointments.

 

Nate's advice is great as usual, and multi-hour appointments almost always carry some discounts. But since I've hired (or attempted to hire) alot of newbies and unreviewed guys over the past few years, I will make contact, describe a multi-hour evening appointment (usually some play time, sporting event, dinner, etc.), and ask them to quote me a rate. Many times I receive a response that ignores the content of my idea and just writes something like "My rate is $____ per hour." I received another response like that yesterday. I just pass and move on the next one. It's not a matter of affordability, but why schedule that guy when I know a better deal (for the same hot time) is right around the corner with the next guy. Furthermore, the response reveals that he and I will not be a good match, because his mindset is likely all about quickies, get in, get off, and get out. I wonder how many times guys like that have to be declined before they figure out that their rate structure may be discouraging biz.

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I gave him a time breakdown of what I thought we would be doing, but I thought I was asking him for a total fee, not a breakdown into two different rates. I should have worded it better.

 

His base outcall rate is $160/hr, incall is $140/hr. Using your rates of $200 for one hour and $500 for 5 hours, a reasonable fee for him would be $400 for 5 hours, so a bit less for 4 hours. I should offer around $350.

 

Golly, I am starting to sound cheap and analytical, aren't I? $350 and give him a $100 tip if he's not a clockwatcher sounds good.

 

Thanks for your feedback.

*

 

Do it! And if he gets that tip you are more likely to get an even more enjoyable time the next time you see him, or even a little extra time.

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Jaw,

 

If you're hiring newbies the problem is not that you are looking for a discount, it is probably that they are new and any resource they find online is going to tell them to respond in a similar fashion. These guys have likely not developed the art of detecting detectives or they still lack the confidence of dealing with them. If some one tries to talk money and anything sexual with me in the first contact, I will most likely refer them back to my ad. I'm not being rude, it isn't that I don't want to give some one a multi-hour and it isn't that I don't want to work with them.

 

Try to take in more in the light of them trying to be professional even though they are new. Cut 'em a little slack and remember them protecting themselves is also potentially you and any other clients they are seeing.

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Cut 'em a little slack and remember them protecting themselves is also potentially you and any other clients they are seeing.

 

I don't give 'em a hard time. It's obvious they are new and don't know what the hell they are doing, but professional, they are not. I just pass without berating them or providing any commentary on their business practice. I don't consider it my responsibility to help them figure this all out. I'm just one of the clients that's been hiring long enough that the only thrill left for me in this hobby is taking chances on newbies, so I try to feel 'em out before I feel 'em up. ;)

 

For example, I contacted a rentboy, who's ad is new in my city, very minimal info (nothing about sexual or personal preferences is listed at all), and no rate info is posted. So I send a cordial email, describing myself and the kind of guy I am, outlining the general flow of an evening appointment, relaxing play time with dinner or a sporting event, never do I discuss sexual activities, and simply request if he has any interest in meeting me for that kind of appointment and his rate for the evening.

 

Yesterday's response: "My rate is 300 per hour."

 

That was it. No "hey", no expression of enthusiasm, no further personal details or interests or pics (which the ad promises to provide since he only has one posted). I just roll my eyes and think "one day, he'll get a clue or he'll disappear from this and go away." To be honest, he did answer my question, but I find it hard to believe that he can book even one appointment with that strategy.

 

It's that one good one out of 10 that makes it worthwhile to keep trying. :)

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Yesterday's response: "My rate is 300 per hour."

 

That was it. No "hey", no expression of enthusiasm, no further personal details or interests or pics (which the ad promises to provide since he only has one posted). I just roll my eyes and think "one day, he'll get a clue or he'll disappear from this and go away." To be honest, he did answer my question, but I find it hard to believe that he can book even one appointment with that strategy.

 

That is just bad interpersonal skills. I had actually assumed YOU already knew all of what I was saying. Just wanted to put it out there for any one else newer to hiring :p

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Those boys don't know what they are missing, not connecting with an easy-going, no-pressure guy like me. Heck, my last 20 hires would probably say being with me was the easiest cash they ever earned......HAHAHA! None of my hires in Fort Lauderdale last week can complain that I put 'em through the ringers. Maybe I'm just too polite and easy....hmmmmm

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They learn eventually that taking a $500 5hr appointment is far better than not working that night or taking 3 $200/hr appointments. It is so much easier to do the one than do multiple. But both best be damn good conversationalists. Or some one better be really good at giving head...

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