Unexpected, not suprising, underhanded, cleverly protected by a well crafted persona

[KMEM]

BG-

 

I am afraid that most of those who read and understood your post already knew what you mean; the others do not and will not.

 

TC-

 

Those that take big risks can have either big rewards or big failures. Sometimes both at the same time. Personally, I respect anyone who "tries" regardless of the results.

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[Boston Guy]

Once again Boston Guy you provide the most incisive analysis of any poster on this board.

 

Thank you.

 

BG-

 

I am afraid that most of those who read and understood your post already knew what you mean; the others do not and will not.

 

Best regards,

KMEM

 

Perhaps, but I am ever the optimist.

 

BG

[Boston Guy]

I truly believe this experience has done what no other could.... Truly made me see what is the toxic nature of this forum. While it has so many great qualities that I have enjoyed over the months of posting here... This experience has left me feeling vulnerable, paranoid and altogether disheartened. Perhaps feeling like I just left one family to know This other has such issues is just to much right now.

 

Im not playing the im leaving only to come back card. I know I'll be back But I clearly need some distance from this board for a while. So please enjoy the entertainment in my absense and when I have gurded my loins from this experience. I'll see you all again.

 

Tomcat Out

 

Good luck to you!

 

Like many others, I have seen a great deal on these boards over the years, including more than a few bitter fights and arguments. Even so, I do not view the forums as "toxic". I think that it is entirely possible to come here, find interesting things and interesting people, and enjoy both. But it seems to me that it is entirely possible to put too much of oneself into the forums. I have seen escorts make this mistake and clients make this mistake. They share too much and, when I see this, I sometimes wonder if they have no other friends or no other outlet for their thoughts.

 

I have long recommended that clients not make the mistake of confusing escorts with friends and that escorts keep their clients as clients, not friends. When people do this, the relationship stays clearer and the boundaries more defined. It's when those boundaries begin to break down that heartbreak and disappointment and confusion often follows, sometimes very publicly.

 

You will recall my recommendation to find a group of good gay friends -- people to share life with in real life. No one should confuse this place with real life or substitute coming here for having a real, active, enjoyable, healthy social life with people that they look at over a table. When you are an escort and view these forums as a tool to improve your business, then it becomes clear what you should do: things that will improve your business and nothing at all that will hurt it. When you are a client, especially someone new to being gay or new to hiring escorts, there is a temptation to leap in with both feet and share thoughts and experiences with seemingly little regard for the potential consequences.

 

I've hired many escorts but very few know my full real name. I am honest in what I tell escorts but I only share what is necessary for us to enjoy a good time together and I do not ask them to share any more of their personal information with me. While I am sometimes curious about an escort's background, it's none of my business. When I ask them to respect my privacy, I must also respect theirs. Discretion and tact go both ways.

 

Unfortunately, both have been badly abused in this thread. Perhaps others will learn from it. When you decide to come back and participate again -- which I hope you will do -- perhaps you will have placed the forums in a healthier place in your mind. Instead of viewing this place as a family, perhaps you will view it as one place out of many where you can go and spend an enjoyable bit of time. Perhaps you will also realize that it's still an online forum, that everything that is posted here is searchable on Google, and that it is not wise to treat it like one's immediately family, revealing myriad personal details with an expectation that those details will be treated with care by trusted loved ones.

 

BG

[BewareofNick]

Anyone ever have one of the Freshcetta pizzas at a Regal Cinema? I did last night when I went to see "The Other Guys". It was pricy of course but actually very good. Any other theaters with good pizza?

[Guest socal30]

I truly believe this experience has done what no other could.... Truly made me see what is the toxic nature of this forum. While it has so many great qualities that I have enjoyed over the months of posting here... This experience has left me feeling vulnerable, paranoid and altogether disheartened. Perhaps feeling like I just left one family to know This other has such issues is just to much right now.

 

Im not playing the im leaving only to come back card. I know I'll be back But I clearly need some distance from this board for a while. So please enjoy the entertainment in my absense and when I have gurded my loins from this experience. I'll see you all again.

 

Tomcat Out

 

I really did enjoy your posts. It felt like they were from the heart and you were open about your vulnerabilities and your trials and tribulations. It allowed me to share my personal stuff and get it out-so thanks for that ! I have never met or communicated with you otherwise, but they were helpful.

 

On the other stuff, I still don't get it. I am a real newbie at this, so can't speak from experience. But can speak from my experience in my proffession.

All I see is this.

Client hires a Proffesional. Client pays fully and both enjoyed their time. Client agrees to do review. proffessional then texts and asks for review a couple of times(my proffession that is a big no-no- assuming that is how it went down.) proffessional decides to share what happened to all and sundry. I can understand if client didn't pay, gave a bad review-but just scratching my head over this whole thread? perhaps some gossip was shared-but I have never been in a group of humans, where at some point they didn't start talking about other people they knew.

 

Anyways , now that I am preparing and actually talking to some folks for hiring, I guess I will follow one of the poster's advice and not mention this forum or user name . Safer I guess. Life is a journey as they say !

 

To the OP, perhaps something else happened. But you sounded like a real interesting person -open and your unique perspective. Then this thread happened-well your choice. Like I said I am a newbie , so I don't know the dynamics of this business-but I would never pull a stunt like this , no matter how annoyed I am with the client-unless I am planning to quit. In a way, you have indicated that in your other thread-well kinda. Which is fine-I am in a my third line of work now-but good luck.

[KMEM]

Thank you.

 

 

 

Perhaps, but I am ever the optimist.

 

BG

 

I agree with ArVaguy and I also include you in the group who tries and that I admire.

 

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[MiamiLooker]

Apparently (as I understand RC's postings) there is vast cabal of posters that use the private messaging function to both promote their 'favored' escorts and to undermine the "unfavored" escorts. Apparently it is unfair for members to discuss their hires in private with other members. Although as long as I've been here, I've never received any of these so called messages telling me I can only hire escort X over escort Y.

 

But then again MiamiLooker, I guess you and I may be part of this cabal. As I seem to recall that over the years, you and I have (on very, very rare ocassions) had discussions in private about certain escorts here in South Florida.

 

 

This is quite an embarrassing and painful revelation for me, that after over ten years of participating in this forum, I've only received 28 PM's total. LOL, two of them were from you (remember that ugly masseur from Fort Lauderdale with the multiple screen names, who, ironically, tried to manipulate the Reviews and the Message Center). This thread should be closed now before anyone else is hurt.

 

http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/photo/f60/6ad/f606ad58-47f5-4488-8254-722341a4b726

[flguy]

What happened to Romann's post to this thread from this morning????

[Guest alanm]

What happened to Romann's post to this thread from this morning????

 

Romann's post was only on-line here for a short period of time. I hope he decided to have it taken down after some thought.

[Romann]

Oh no he didn't!

 

What happened to Romann's post to this thread from this morning????

 

Hello!

 

Yes, I did have a post up this morning targeted at both David-SF and Ryan Cade which Tomcat kindly requested I remove and out of respect for my client and also my friend, I did without delay to avoid anymore fanning of the fires.

 

That said, my dear David-SF who claims to be an angel in all this.. You have some serious misgivings/misstatements which need correcting about your involvement in all of this, past and current concerning your gossiping conversations/trash talk about escorts, specifically the one in question who started this thread not to mention clients as well which you claim you don't do. Please... People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones especially when they're lying about their involvement in the mud slinging. I have since retained my post and have it saved in email which I have sent to David for his review. Soon I will see his thought process on what I know to be true and what he claims in this thread.

 

Do the right thing David and either fess up or shut up. Your involvement in this thread has been less than honest and you know it. As do I and others... You CAN'T have it both ways nor will I stand here and allow you to talk out both ends of your mouth while trying to play "sweet and nice like sugar and spice" all the while being dishonest to save your OWN rear while throwing others under the buss.

[Romann]

Romann's post was only on-line here for a short period of time. I hope he decided to have it taken down after some thought.

 

Truth hurts...

[+ ArVaGuy]

It’s very clear that this thread is not going to die its well deserved death in the archives any time soon. Also, at least for now, the administrators see no need to close it and end the discussions. My position on this thread as changed from “close it” to “why care?” at this point in time.

 

This board has seen plenty of nasty fights and meltdowns over the years. It’s likely no worse than most other discussion boards in that regard. MuscleService.com has fights that make even this one look like a quilting bee. (Must be the steroids.)

 

There have been several escorts (and clients) who’ve had mental breakdowns publicly on this board. The ones that come to foremost to mind being Devon and Sean World Escort. Both of those were several years back. Also, it was an escort related meltdown that resulted in moderators being instituted for this board.

 

In each instance this board community survived and moved on. Some wind up indelibly scared by the experience while others just shrug the whole thing off. One of these days maybe a couple of years from now there will be a similar instance just like this one where an escort has a public psychotic episode with resulting chaos associated. And when that happens there will likely be a member of this forum who states: “Remember a couple of years ago when Ryan Cade had a similar breakdown?”

 

The merry-go-round will continue unabated.

[instudiocity]

In each instance this board community survived and moved on. Some wind up indelibly scared by the experience while others just shrug the whole thing off. One of these days maybe a couple of years from now there will be a similar instance just like this one where an escort has a public psychotic episode with resulting chaos associated. And when that happens there will likely be a member of this forum who states: “Remember a couple of years ago when Ryan Cade had a similar breakdown?”

Reading through RC's post, I think I could point to 2 & 1/2 public psychotic episodes with it's resultant chaos.

[+ David-SF]

I am guilty as charged

 

yes i have gossiped. yes I discuss my opinion with other escorts that I love and care about my thoughts and feelings about other escorts. yes I am guilty of these things from one end of the earth to the other. Rarely do I discuss my opinion about escorts to clients unless I whole heartily have information that can benefit them in their hiring process

I love to talk shop its my world and I try hard not to talk out of school.

I can be opinionated from time to time even passionate.

BUT I WILL NOT EVER TELL A CLIENT NOT TO HIRE AN ESCORT BECAUSE I BELIEVE THE ESCORT IS BAD NEWS.

I DO NOT WANT TO FURTHER MYSELF ALONG THIS PATH AT THE EXPENSE OF ANYONE.

 

I sincerely apologize for getting involved in this thread my vain attempt to be the smarty pants sage of good ideals has bit me in the ass once again. PK was right even if he was joking

I meant no harm to Tomcat whom I happen to adore nor to Ryan whom I do not know but because he is or was an escort I was trying to advise and be helpful (I WAS NOT HELPFUL)

(INSERT FOOT IN MOUTH AND PULL HEAD OUT OF MY ASS HERE)

 

Romann no matter what we have had in the past or today i will always care for you adore you and send stars and love your way i will never bad mouth you EVER if I have said something that was offensive to anyone about you it was a poor choice on my part and it should have never been said. More importantly if someone has said I shared negetive information about you then I am even more sorry you had to endure that

You are deeply embedded in my heart and always will be.

 

If anywhere in this MC I have made some terrible mistake (and I most certainly have many times) I only ask that you accept my sincere apology I am sorry Romann that we had words today I know how much you care for TC and for that I yield and surrender.

 

I Love this place because we can be human make mistakes and still come back and have a home please Tomcat dont read my post as if it were about you it was not it was a poorly written post that left too much ambiguity especially since you were the target of the OP It was unthoughtful of me and insensitive to you.

 

I am not a great source of advise or ideas sometimes and here I see I was putting too much thinking into my post Just got home and need to rest after an 11 hour flight and ever minute of that flight I was thinking about this thread arghhhhh!!

[Steven_Draker]

About "Discretion", "Honesty" and Grand Masquerade

 

... That said, my dear David-SF who claims to be an angel in all this.. You have some serious misgivings/misstatements which need correcting about your involvement in all of this, past and current concerning your gossiping conversations/trash talk about escorts, specifically the one in question who started this thread not to mention clients as well which you claim you don't do. Please... People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones especially when they're lying about their involvement in the mud slinging. I have since retained my post and have it saved in email which I have sent to David for his review. Soon I will see his thought process on what I know to be true and what he claims in this thread.

 

Do the right thing David and either fess up or shut up. Your involvement in this thread has been less than honest and you know it. As do I and others... You CAN'T have it both ways nor will I stand here and allow you to talk out both ends of your mouth while trying to play "sweet and nice like sugar and spice" all the while being dishonest to save your OWN rear while throwing others under the buss.

 

 

Why wearing a mask?

 

"One reason for wearing a mask is to pretend to be someone or something else. The mask can be a kind of language that expresses the emotion of the figure one chooses to create. When one sees a person wearing a mask depicting a happy expression, what do you think it means? ... Mask, or hide, the wearer's real emotions, such as unhappiness."

 

http://images.theage.com.au/2008/11/01/254002/majobamamask-420x0.jpg

 

"We are all conditioned and trained to live in a socially acceptable manner. We are taught to behave in a way that is proper. Right from the time we were babies we are told- don’t do this and don’t do that. We are rarely told what we are allowed to do. People, it seems, like to ignore us when we are on our best behavior. They only notice us when we do something bad, like maybe throw a temper tantrum. We are told it is not nice to cry in public, or that we must not laugh too loud, or speak with our mouth full of food etc. We are taught that it is rude to tell someone you do not like them, so we pretend to like them.

 

More often than not, we wear a mask. We hide our true feelings, we learn to deny what we are feeling. We tell lies in order to be polite, for example if we are invited for lunch or dinner, and you just hate the main dish, you will still put on your best smiling face and pretend to be enjoying it and even praise it, just to be polite. It would be very rude after all to the host/ hostess and the cook to say that you hated the food. On the other hand people preach to us that honesty is the best policy, that we must tell the truth, that is bad to tell lies.

 

It then goes without saying that we are in conflict. We do not really know the right way to behave. We then get into the habit of wearing the mask to such an extent that we often do not know who we are or what we really want.

 

This then stops us from really being ourselves. We learn to behave in ways that will please people often stifling our inner most desires. We soon become victims of our own circumstances. We start to rebel, fight, turn to alcohol or smoking because we do not like the person we are forced to be. We are exhibiting codependent behavior.

 

It is then very important for our own mental health that we learn to drop the mask we wear and just be our own selves."

 

Source: "I'm a loser"

[best hotel]

many of us have been in this type of emotional hell on this board......at the risk of offending anyone with a generalization, we are in an all male community.....and men are, by nature, agressive creatures.....the astounding number of people who visited this thread, or couldn't resist a comment, speaks to the fact that we have trouble staying away from a good fight......even sweet david threw a grenade....i hope all involved can find punctuation for their comments and move on......while staying involved in this community....especially ryan and tom.....i also have to admit that some of this fighting by all of these smart, sexy men was pretty hot, in my horny opinion....peace, m

[+ purplekow]

are you kidding best hotel? i have already started my screen play based on the postings here. Now who to cast as me? I am thinking Vince Ferelli but he may be a bit too short. Ah well. If any of the posters have ideas of who should play them in the movie, hijack this thread and let me know. If you cant kill it, you can at least take it to a dark place and change it to something unrecognizable.

[Romann]

What time is it? It's DICK-THIRTY!

 

i also have to admit that some of this fighting was pretty sexy, in my opinion

 

True. When men get to chest thumping, it quickly moves to dick slapping and then cock sucking to help each of us lick our wounds. That said, which cock am I gonna be a suckin' on like a lolly pop to make those pains go away and get to the creamy center?

 

Any takers or am I alone on this thought and action?

[+ Charlie]

This thread is like some horrible accident: those of us who are not involved know the decent thing to do is to drive by with eyes averted, but we can't help stopping to gawk and comment on the pattern of blood spatter. I really do hope the injured will recover.

[+ purplekow]

So Charlie, who is playing you in the movie?

[+ purplekow]

True. When men get to chest thumping, it quickly moves to dick slapping and then cock sucking to help each of us lick our wounds. That said, which cock am I gonna be a suckin' on like a lolly pop to make those pains go away and get to the creamy center?

 

Any takers or am I alone on this thought and action?

Romann, the fact that most of us know the answer to that question is what caused this thread to be born. Now who will play you in the movie or are you willing to take the role?

[+ Charlie]

Unfortunately, Cary Grant is dead.

So Charlie, who is playing you in the movie?

[best hotel]

Pk....i can't help but picture you as that cute purple cow avatar......Roman, in hindsight, i realize that my ability to suck an angry man's cock was the entire basis of my relationship with my ex-boyfirend

[+ purplekow]

My nose is a bit smaller and my complexion a bit less robust than the cow. Vince Ferelli though has the right feel for me i think, though he mostly bottoms so i may need to play myself in all the sex scenes.

[best hotel]

Pk....i am so happy to hear you are a top....i will be whoever you want me to be as long as i am on the bottom