Straight, gay, or in between?

[Will]

Lucky and I have been corresponding about the phrase "straight, but gay-friendly" in describing an escort. I wondered what that meant; he wondered whether anyone had offered to explain. So far, no one has.

 

I have friends who are "straight, but gay-friendly." They're also married to women. And they don't have sex with men, even for money.

 

To my mind, this is a puzzle, for an obvious reason: If a man can't get a hard-on unless he's sexually aroused, and if a straight man has a hard-on when he's having sex with another man, why is the straight man sexually aroused in that situation?

 

But my real topic for this thread is this: Does it turn you off or on – or leave you in neutral – when an escort declares himself to be (a) straight, (b) bisexual, or © gay? In other words, does the other man's self-identification as straight/bi/gay matter for your own sexual interest?

 

Because I brought it up, I'll volunteer to go first. If a man says he's straight, I lose all sexual interest in him almost immediately. If he says he's bi, I might not lose interest altogether, but I would think long and hard before I hired an escort who said that he is bisexual. It turns out that I am genuinely attracted only to men who call themselves (or who seem to me to be) gay. That's sort of new for me and I'm not sure what to make of it. It doesn't bother me, really, but it does perplex me a little. Why should it matter at all?

[ready182]

If an male escort states that he is straight, but gay friendly, I would intrepret that to mean:

 

> he will receive oral

> he does not give oral

> he probably will top

> he definitely does not bottom

> he probably is not into kissing or cuddling

> he is "straight-acting" in public

[Guest Merlin]

Describing himself as straight would not affect my decision to hire an escort if he has a good body, face and dick. But if he cannot get hard, it would be a turn off from me. I am sure some who call themselves straight are in fact gay or bi. But some are straight. I believe that getting hard for them is like jacking off, it is just a matter of physical manipulation. At least one has told me that he day- dreams of his girl.

[bluenix]

>if a straight man has a hard-on when he's having sex with

>another man, why is the straight man sexually aroused in

>that situation?

 

Because, unlike women, men LIKE to be objectified. It is a turn-on to be admired for your body. Similarly, a man happlily getting lots of sex within the bonds of holy matrimony will still, from time to time, get out his hand and crash the yogurt truck. It doesn't mean he doesn't love his wife, it's just that male sexual drive is (more or less) independent of emotional attachment.

 

>But my real topic for this thread is this: Does it turn you

>off or on – or leave you in neutral – when an escort

>declares himself to be (a) straight, (b) bisexual, or ©

>gay?

 

He has to be gay. I guess it's a sort of shibboleth to (hopefully) weed out the maladjusted.

[+ Lucky]

Well, I once had a straight, married client I was attracted to. I flirted with him, we became friendly, he stopped by my apartment one night. When I wasn't looking, he stripped. I turned and faced a huge, stiff cock. I had met his wife. He was my client. Still, I said "It has to be a two-way."

He responded that I could only suck him off.

I politely gave him an opportunity to put his clothes back on in the most face-saving way I could.

No, I do not want to "do" straight guys! It has to be a two-way!

[phage]

>But my real topic for this thread is this: Does it turn you

>off or on – or leave you in neutral – when an escort

>declares himself to be (a) straight, (b) bisexual, or ©

>gay? In other words, does the other man's

>self-identification as straight/bi/gay matter for your own

>sexual interest?

 

Straight trade can be a lot of fun as long as you know that’s what you’re getting ahead of time and are in the mood for it. I’ll happily drop to my knees and service a “straight” guy but I won’t ask them to top me. It’s just one of my own psychological quirks that I prefer to be kissed before I get plowed.

 

>Why should it matter at all?

 

Because you’re one of those clients who like the date as much as the sex – at least I believe that is the case from your posting. (We really need to come up with terms for the “romantic” clients and the “don’t talk…just strip” clients.) Why would you want to waste your time on a gay-for-pay escort? It’s hard to get a romantic fantasy going with a straight boy.

 

You have to be looking for a sex machine in order to enjoy straight trade. I don’t do it often because I like kissing too much, but it can definitely be big fun. Something about making them do what you want (within their huge boundaries) for money. It’s a power trip, and I’m probably compensating for being picked last during high school gym class, but I still get off on it.

[Rick Munroe]

Lucky, please email me his phone number. :9

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

>To my mind, this is a puzzle, for an obvious reason: If a

>man can't get a hard-on unless he's sexually aroused, and if

>a straight man has a hard-on when he's having sex with

>another man, why is the straight man sexually aroused in

>that situation?

 

IMHO at the base physical level there is little to distinguish between gay and straight. Oral and genital labido are physical stimulus response actions. A mouth on a cock or lips on lips are independent of the gender of the mouth. I recognize that there may be some possible genetically-based physical differences such as pheromone senitivity/response, but I think this is a subtle secondary physical characteristic designed to bring two sets up lips together etc. If the meeting occurs, no matter how, the physical sex drive takes over.

 

I think learning overlays the gender aspect on top of the base physical system -- probably causing a selective sharpening of sensitivity of some aspects of the physical system to gender.

 

>

>But my real topic for this thread is this: Does it turn you

>off or on – or leave you in neutral – when an escort

>declares himself to be (a) straight, (b) bisexual, or ©

>gay? In other words, does the other man's

>self-identification as straight/bi/gay matter for your own

>sexual interest?

>

 

To answer this I have to first say that I agree with ready's defintion of gay-friendly, and second I am a top and seek bottoms who kiss and commit active oral. Thus straight or gay-friendly escorts don't fit the bill. If they did the deeds then I see no operational difference, at least for hourlys, other than their own self image. And their self-image is what I think ultimately gets in the way -- based on my hypothesis above.

 

I was discussing the subject with a friend just last week at a local strip club. THe subject: privates by straight dancers who may or may not kiss and may or may not do active oral but top and definitely don't bottom. He made the point if they kiss or can get an erection to top aren't they gay. My point, it doesn't matter what they are, it matters what they think they are -- it affects what they are willing to do for me.

 

:-)

[+ Charlie]

Power can be erotic in itself, and for a straight man, especially a young one, getting another man to suck his dick can be a turn on, even if he is not sexually aroused by the man himself. I imagine that the submissive offering of the ass has the same effect.

 

Straight men who offer their bodies for money are usually not very interesting to talk to, because they are usually preoccupied with their own egos--at least on that occasion--so unless you want to talk all about him before, during, and after the act, it is not very satisfying as a social experience. However, in the right circumstances I can really get off on just servicing a hot straight guy.

 

One of the most exciting escort experiences I ever had was with a young Italian American stud who was pretty wild sexually; at the end of the appointment he was reading porn while I sucked him off, and when I sneaked a peak at it afterwards, I discovered it was straight porn.

[+ imagooddog]

This is a difficult topic at times. I personally am attracted to

both gay and straight guys as long as they are masculine and have

nice bodies and cocks. I am very oral, and a WILLING straight guy

with the nice body and dick is a real turn on for me. In a way,

I can be more attracted sexually to a bi or married guy at times than a gay guy. I used to see a guy regularly, he picked me up at a

local park, he was a former college football player, had only been

married 3 months at the time, but loved to be sucked and fucked

while he watched straight porn. We both knew the boundaries and

were willing to accept them. As I said, for me, it was a turn-on

but for others who are looking for or expecting more it would not

be. Depends strickly on the person!