reflection The Greatest Luxury This Industry Gave Me Was Time

[JRNOFEXPRS]

I began massage work in 2009 for a reason most people probably wouldn’t expect.

Time.

Not money. Not freedom. Time.

I grew up with four siblings in a household where both parents worked constantly. They did what they had to do, but it created something people from that generation understand well:

Latchkey kids.

Empty houses after school.
Microwave dinners.
Figuring life out quietly on your own while adults chased work and survival.

So when my son was in elementary school and we moved, I watched the anger hit him. His whole world changed overnight. New environment. New routine. New everything.

And I remember thinking very clearly:

I do not want to become a distant figure he only passes in hallways between work shifts.

Massage work gave me something traditional employment never could.

Presence.

I homeschooled him. Ate meals with him. Watched movies with him in the middle of weekdays. Helped him grow a gaming channel on YouTube. Heard his thoughts as they formed instead of years later after he had already become someone else.

People often assume this industry is only about sensuality, temptation, or fantasy.

But for me, one of its greatest gifts was much quieter than that.

It gave me time with my son while he was still becoming himself.

He’s now an adult.
College graduate.
Engaged.

Funny enough, the older I get, the more I realize success may simply be asking yourself one question honestly:

“Were you truly there for the people you loved?”

[+ purplekow]

I never had children and I am glad I did not have to navigate their primary education.  I have no great love for public or private schooling as the one size fits all method of curriculum building is short sighted and prejudicial.  Math may be factual, but history, literature, and other social sciences definitely take on the biases of those making the curriculum.  

However, home schooling seems too narrow and limited when untrained educators are doing the training and of course there are biases there as well.  Those biases may go unnoticed as the student and the teacher are likely to share not only information but the information biases.  In addition, the social interactive skills of those home schooled is likely to be limited.  

I was bussed out of my local school district to a nearby neighbor to meet integration requirements in the 1960's.  Most of the children in the neighborhood went to the local catholic school to avoid being shipped off.  My parents had the Sophie's Choice of being able to only send one of the two of us to the local school and so I was bussed.  I am grateful that occurred.  I experience a diversified school class room free of the religious dogma of the catholic school education.  As I became a teen, it became clear to me that I held different social values from most of the others, adults and children, in my neighborhood.  I attribute that to having a different educational experience.  I am glad I was the prodigal son.  

[+ PhileasFogg]

On 5/15/2026 at 7:00 PM, JRNOFEXPRS said:

People often assume this industry is only about sensuality, temptation, or fantasy.

There are serious guys like you who prove that wrong.   As a reformed latchkey kid, I applaud the path you took and admire the choices you’ve made!

[wsc]

On 5/15/2026 at 8:00 PM, JRNOFEXPRS said:

I began massage work in 2009 for a reason most people probably wouldn’t expect.

Time.

Not money. Not freedom. Time.

I grew up with four siblings in a household where both parents worked constantly. They did what they had to do, but it created something people from that generation understand well:

Latchkey kids.

Empty houses after school.
Microwave dinners.
Figuring life out quietly on your own while adults chased work and survival.

So when my son was in elementary school and we moved, I watched the anger hit him. His whole world changed overnight. New environment. New routine. New everything.

And I remember thinking very clearly:

I do not want to become a distant figure he only passes in hallways between work shifts.

Massage work gave me something traditional employment never could.

Presence.

I homeschooled him. Ate meals with him. Watched movies with him in the middle of weekdays. Helped him grow a gaming channel on YouTube. Heard his thoughts as they formed instead of years later after he had already become someone else.

People often assume this industry is only about sensuality, temptation, or fantasy.

But for me, one of its greatest gifts was much quieter than that.

It gave me time with my son while he was still becoming himself.

He’s now an adult.
College graduate.
Engaged.

Funny enough, the older I get, the more I realize success may simply be asking yourself one question honestly:

“Were you truly there for the people you loved?”

One of the most beautiful, insightful, and moving posts I have ever read. Thank you for it, and for the smile on my face and the spring in my step.

If he doesn't already, I hope your son comes to know how lucky he was and how exceptional was his father.

Edited 22 hours ago by wsc
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