Biggest cooking fail...

[samhexum]

On 1/11/2024 at 8:15 PM, samhexum said:

RE:  Kraft Mac & Cheese:

I know it seems like I subsist on Mac & Cheese, but I average about 1 box a month.

Had a box tonight and am down to one left.

[Km411]

I’m with you if it’s Kraft Deluxe (only the best for me)

[Guest]

My biggest cooking fail?

I made a Tres Leches cake... without the leches.

and I don't just mean pouring it over the cake when it was finished baking. I mean, I forgot to even put milk into the cake batter. It came out like a giant burnt cookie.

[shinj518]

Back in college, I tried making buttermilk beer batter fried chicken, but it was my first time trying to deep fry anything, my mom never really deep fried food at home so I never saw that process, and i didn't have a thermometer to measure the oil temperature. Because I see deep frying at fast food restaurants and on TV as having bubbles, I thought that the oil would come to a boil when its ready for frying so I kept waiting and waiting for the oil to boil. Eventually I got tired of waiting and I decided to try putting one beer battered wing in and it spattered and caught fire immediately and so then I threw it in the sink and tried to put out the fire with more water which was a disaster. Fortunately I managed to put it out by using the lid to extinguish the fire before a full on kitchen fire started but needless to say everything was ruined and I was too scared to try again. 

I've gotten better at deep frying things since then.

[+ FrankR]

4 hours ago, shinj518 said:

Back in college, I tried making buttermilk beer batter fried chicken, but it was my first time trying to deep fry anything, my mom never really deep fried food at home so I never saw that process, and i didn't have a thermometer to measure the oil temperature. Because I see deep frying at fast food restaurants and on TV as having bubbles, I thought that the oil would come to a boil when its ready for frying so I kept waiting and waiting for the oil to boil. Eventually I got tired of waiting and I decided to try putting one beer battered wing in and it spattered and caught fire immediately and so then I threw it in the sink and tried to put out the fire with more water which was a disaster. Fortunately I managed to put it out by using the lid to extinguish the fire before a full on kitchen fire started but needless to say everything was ruined and I was too scared to try again. 

I've gotten better at deep frying things since then.

Yikes! May I recommend an airfrier instead? 😉

[mike carey]

4 minutes ago, FrankR said:

Yikes! May I recommend an airfrier instead? 😉

Nah, don't think an air fryer would be the best thing to cook battered food from scratch. Deep frying is fine once you work out that the bubbles in the oil are from the water in the food you're cooking, not from the fat itself. You test for heat by dropping a small piece of what you want to cook into it, if it froths, you're about right.

But have a fire blanket on hand, hot fat is dangerous, you can burn your house down. (Hot jam/jellies or anything with a lot of sugar in them are seriously hot too, but they'll stick to you and keep burning you, but not your kitchen.)

[shinj518]

13 hours ago, FrankR said:

Yikes! May I recommend an airfrier instead? 😉

I use an air fryer for certain things but I find that for a really good crisp breading, it does have to be traditional oil unfortunately... (my personal opinion of course).

13 hours ago, mike carey said:

Nah, don't think an air fryer would be the best thing to cook battered food from scratch. Deep frying is fine once you work out that the bubbles in the oil are from the water in the food you're cooking, not from the fat itself. You test for heat by dropping a small piece of what you want to cook into it, if it froths, you're about right.

But have a fire blanket on hand, hot fat is dangerous, you can burn your house down. (Hot jam/jellies or anything with a lot of sugar in them are seriously hot too, but they'll stick to you and keep burning you, but not your kitchen.)

I've since bought fire blankets and a fire extinguisher which I keep in the kitchen. Don't know how well the fire blanket will work, but hopefully will never have to find out.

[Guest]

Definitely the other night when I was cooking with minced garlic.

I loosen the caps on the mccormick bottles so I can apply my spices in a more controlled twisting/sprinkling motion than a chaotic shake that get things everywhere. Cap fully came off and emptied an entire brand new bottle into my pan. 

Didn't know how to salvage it 🫠

Edited March 7 by BodeBrentwood

[+ Summerson]

4 minutes ago, BodeBrentwood said:

 Cap fully came off and emptied an entire container of a brand new bottle into my pan. 

I did that once with a brand new bottle of Worcestershire sauce. The brand I usually buy has a pouring spout in the neck of the bottle. This brand did not, but I didn't notice that. It happened so fast but also seemed to take forever, like watching a slow motion special effect as the stream just gushed out of the bottle and into the pot. 

[shinj518]

20 minutes ago, BodeBrentwood said:

Definitely the other night when I was cooking with minced garlic.

I loosen the caps on the mccormick bottles so I can apply my spices in a more controlled sprinkling than a chaotic shake and get things everywhere. Cap fully came off and emptied an entire container of a brand new bottle into my pan. 

Didn't know how to salvage it 🫠

I've done that with black pepper too when the holes are too small for the spice itself.

Speaking of spices, I keep my spices organized alphabetically in a cabinet and I was making some cookie or pastry for the holidays and thought I had grabbed ground cinnamon but when I shook quite a bit into the mixture, I discovered it smelled kinda funny and found I had dumped a bunch of cumin powder instead. Had to throw the whole thing away and restart from scratch.

[LaffingBear]

My personal biggest cooking fails are:

My first attempt at bread.  I made some simple cheddar casserole bread recipe.... it was beautiful to see as it came out of the oven.  And a rock hard crust surrounding an entirely hollow interior.  I've never attempted loaf bread since, only quick breads and bready pastries.

I hosted a birthday party for a friend.  Main course was Arroz con Pollo with seafood.  Chicken, rice, with mussels and shrimp.  Beautiful table great hors d'oeuvre, first courses, etc.  The main course was a gummy mess.  It tasted OK, but I'd used the wrong type of rice, and something called a paella dish, but it was really 100% unsuitable for that type of cooking.

The party fail that sticks in my memory is my parents, big entertainers, all out bashes.   One party in winter.... my mother took a big crystal bowl to a local caterer or bakery, had it filled with chocolate mousse.  No room in the refrigerator, she set the box outside on the porch until dessert time.  Next morning, there was an OMG moment, "I forgot all about the mousse!"  We opened the back door and the squirrels went running... they'd gotten into the box and feasted on mousse.  There was an, "I hate to tell you what i spent on that mousse!" comment.  Eventually, we laughed about it for years.  

[+ Gar1eth]

I think I told this story on another thread. But I was up late and decided to make some chicken cacciatore starting probably around midnight or 1 AM. Well I was browning the chicken pieces and set off the smoke detector. I was living in a house with 5 other people. So I was mortified. There was really nothing I could do. I ended up throwing the chicken away. 

[samhexum]

2 hours ago, Gar1eth said:

I was up late and decided to make some chicken cacciatore starting probably around midnight or 1 AM. Well I was browning the chicken pieces and set off the smoke detector. I was living in a house with 5 other people. So I was mortified. There was really nothing I could do. 

 

[samhexum]

On 1/9/2024 at 10:05 PM, MikeBiDude said:

2 cast iron Lodge combo

Just watched a video from a couple of years ago...  this was America's Test Kitchen's Best Buy for bread ovens.

 

[+ Gar1eth]

Not my biggest cooking fail -but definitely a cooking faux pas. I made several mistakes along with a few near misses.
 

I went over to a friend's place tonight. He had a minor surgical procedure. He actually had no activity restrictions but was a bit sore/stiff. I told him I'd come over and make dinner.  It's not that big a deal, I've made dinner or helped him with dinner several times in the past.

I made a meatloaf. He bought/provided most of the stuff. I brought the fixings for Green Bean Casserole (it's not just for Thanksgiving anymore-I'm sure most of you know it. I'll include the recipe below for  non Americans like @mike careywho might not know it. I'm sorry for singling you out Mike, but you're the only non-United States based non-American that I know of who is involved with the Forum here). I also brought/made Stove Top Cornbread Stuffing.
 

 The only difference with this dinner than our usual was that I did almost all of the cooking myself after he got out some of the ingredients. He did do the cleaning up-but I was fairly neat. All that was really needed was putting up the spices and putting pots, pans, plates, and silverware in the dishwasher. 
 

So the mistakes were with the meatloaf. It wasn't awful, but I forgot the dry mustard. (Whisper-I may have also forgotten the salt-mea culpa). He said the meatloaf was ok. But he doesn't use a lot of salt.
 

He only buys non-salted butter-whereas I only buy salted butter. He's a much better/more experienced cook than I am. My thought has always been that if using salted butter is really  going to ruin the recipe, then the recipe is probably too complicated for me to begin with. 
 

I did think the meatloaf needed  salt.  But I probably would have felt that way even if I had added the salt prior to cooking.  I've always liked salt, and I may like it more now that I'm on a diuretic which decreases your body's sodium  

I also forgot to smear the top with ketchup. That was partially both our faults. He didn't buy any bacon to put on top of the meatloaf. And normally I put the ketchup on, and then layer the bacon on top.
 

When  I didn't have any bacon to lay over the top, I didn't think about what else I should be doing to it. 
 

I almost had another mistake. I initially forgot the ketchup that's mixed into the beef. I was about to shape the loaf and put it in the oven when I realized. I put quickly added the ketchup and shaped it. 
 

My  main problem overall was that I hadn't cooked a meatloaf in over a year. If had been au courant with the recipe, I'm sure my mistakes and near misses wouldn't have happened. 
 

Another obstacle was the fact that I keep most  my recipes in a special email account that I made just for recipes. So while preparing, I was reading the recipe off my iPhone. Next time if possible, I will print the recipe off ahead of time-or if no printer is available, write it down. 
 

I promise to do better next time. I plan to make this again later this week. I'll keep you all informed on how it  goes.

I'm pretty sure I've posted this Meatloaf Recipe in the past. But here it is again followed by the Green Bean Casserole Recipe. 

1. •  

This recipe is from my mother. She may have gotten it from the Betty Crocker or the Better Homes and Garden Cookbooks. One thing/the recipe does call for horseradish. My mother never did that. I tried it once-it wasn't bad. But I don't usually use it. I've included some Tips and Hacks I've learned over the years at the bottom of the recipe. 

**********

 

 

 

Ingredients:                      

 

COOK 75 MINUTES

@ 350 F

 

2 pounds ground beef

 

2 eggs beaten

 

2 cups soft bread crumbs 

 

1/4th cup minced onion

 

1 Tablespoon Horseradish 

 

2 tsp Salt

 

1/4th cup milk

 

1/4th cup ketchup

 

1/2 tsp dry mustard

 

2 to 4 slices bacon to top

 

 

Directions:

 

1. Add eggs to meat and blend lightly. 

 

2. Add remaining ingredients and mix well.  

 

3. Shape into oval. 

 

4. Spread ketchup on top. 

 

5. Put 2 to 4 bacon slices on top over ketchup. 

 

6. Place in shallow pan. 

 

7. Cook 75 minutes at

350 F

 

Variation-- Cook in ring mold. Fill center with mashed potatoes when serving. 
 

*****
 

Precooking Tips And Hacks

 

A. 1 Tablespoon of wet mustard is equal to 1 teaspoon of dry  mustard. 

 

B. 3/4 of a cup of dry breadcrumbs is equal to 1 cup soft breadcrumbs. Rehydrate breadcrumbs with -try-1/2 cup of milk and let sit. Then try to unclump with a fork. 

 

C. When adding breadcrumbs try adding a little at a time to keep from clumping in meat. 

 

D. 5 teaspoons of dried minced onion = 1/4 cup

 

2 tablespoons of minced onion  = 1 medium fresh onion. 

 

To rehydrate dried onions-Use 2:1 one water to onions.  Put onion and water in a small microwave proof bowl. Heat for 30 seconds on medium. Let sit 15 minutes or until the water has been absorbed. If the onions still seem wet you can press out the extra water with the back of a spoon.

 

For this recipe that means 10 tsp of water to 5 tsp of onions

 

E) I use an 80/20 (meat to fat percentage) ground beef. A few months back my mother made a meatloaf for the first time in a long time. She picked up the 90/10, and it was much too dry.
 

My friend today had the 93/7. I told him that wouldn't work, so he went out and bought the 80/20 (Note-I offered to pay and have everything delivered. But he wouldn't hear of it. And  yes he did just have a procedure, but he really is almost back to normal-the procedure was Friday morning). 
 

My mother usually makes her own bread crumbs by either putting fresh white bread in a blender or a food processor. I don't usually have either machine available. So I use dry. 
 

My mother probably dices fresh onions for this. I use dried. 
 

*************

Green Bean Casserole 

 

I do the standard here with cream of mushroom soup -but I'll list variations below.  Sorry for the spacing. I cut and pasted this from an email of mine. 
 

1 can (10 1/2 ounces) Campbell’s®           Condensed  Cream of Mushroom               Soup or 98% Fat Free Cream of               Mushroom Soup

 

      1/2 cup milk

 

       1 teaspoon soy sauce

 

       1/4 th teaspoon black peppe

 

       2 - 14.5 ounce cans green beans              (drained)

 

       1-1/3 cups French's® French Fried                Onions

      

 

Instructions (Tips below instructions):

Step 1. 

 Stir the soup, milk, soy sauce, black pepper, beans,  and 2/3 cup onions in a 1 1/2-quart casserole.

Step 2

Bake at 350°F. for 25 minutes or until the bean mixture is hot and bubbling. 

 

Step 3

 Stir the bean mixture.  Sprinkle with the remaining onions.

 

Step 4

 

Bake for 5 minutes or until the onions are golden brown.

•  Tips:

  For the cooked greenbeans
• Use 2 cans (14.5 ounces each) green beans, drained, about 1 1/2 pounds fresh green beans or 16 to 20 ounces frozen greenbeans, thawed, for this recipe.

•  

   

  For Mini GreenBean Casseroles (makes 16), heat the oven to 375°F.  Prep the bean mixture but substitute 1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese for the soy sauce and pepper. 

   

   Roll 16 uncooked refrigerated buttermilk biscuits (two 16-ounce packages) into 4-inch circles and press into 16 muffin-pan cups.  

   

  Fill with the bean mixture and bake for 20 minutes.  Mix 1/3 cup French fried onions and 1/2 cupshredded Cheddar cheese and sprinkle over the greenbean mixture. 

   

  Bake for another 5 minutes.

   

   

  For Golden GreenBean Casserole: Substitute Campbell's® Condensed Golden Mushroom Soup for the Cream of Mushroom Soup. Omit the soy sauce. Stir in 1/4 cup chopped red pepper with the green beans.

   

   

  For Broccoli Casserole: Substitute 4 cups cooked broccoli florets for the greenbeans.

   

   

  To add a festive touch: Stir in 1/4 cup chopped red pepper with the soup.

   

   

  To add crunch:  Add 1/4 cup toasted sliced almonds to the onion topping.

   

   

  Chef Tip: Try this Italian version with pancetta and rosemary!  

   

  Cook 4 ounces pancetta, diced, in a skillet over medium heat until almost crisp.  

   

  Add 1/4 cup chopped onion and 1/2 teaspoon minced fresh rosemary leaves to the skillet and cook until onion is tender.  

   

  Add the pancetta mixture to the soup mixture in Step 1.  

   

  In Step 2, sprinkle the remaining French fried onions with 1 tablespoon grated Pecorino Romano cheese, then bake as directed in Step 3

 

Edited May 18 by Gar1eth

[+ Gar1eth]

PS-For anyone wanting the history of the Green Bean Caserole, here's a link. 
 

The History of Green Bean Casserole – Quaint Cooking

QUAINTCOOKING.COM

---

I did not grow up with Green Bean Casserole as part of my family’s Thanksgiving dinner. Actually, my...

 

Edited May 18 by Gar1eth

[samhexum]

3 hours ago, Gar1eth said:

I went over to a friend's place tonight. He had a minor surgical procedure. I told him I'd come over and make dinner. I made a meatloaf. 

If offered your meatloaf, I'd be out of there like a bat out of hell.

[+ Gar1eth]

3 hours ago, samhexum said:

If offered your meatloaf, I'd be out of there like a bat out of hell.

Assuming you are talking about actual meatloaf and not making a double entendre, that seems rather cruel. 😢😢

 It wasn't bad as it was. And when made correctly, it's delicious!!

[samhexum]

1 minute ago, Gar1eth said:

 It wasn't bad as it was. 

Two out of three ain't bad!

 

1 minute ago, Gar1eth said:

And when made correctly, it's delicious!!

Sounds like paradise... by the appliance bulb light.

I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK, FOLKS!