is dinner on the clock?

[chrismac]

I've never hired for an overnight, nor any longer period of time than 2 hours, but I have hired a few escorts multiple times, one in particular about 10 or 11 times. My thoughts are these:

 

1. I agree with those who say that first time encounters which include dinner should come with the expectation that all time and expenses, including dinner, are on the clock. This could even be true for the second time, and third time.

 

2. When the escort and client have crossed over that nebulous line to call each other "regulars", then the question becomes more complicated. In my business, it's common practice, indeed expected, that the purveyor of services entertain his/her best clients with lunch, dinner, a show, tickets to sporting events, etc.

 

After seeing my most regular escort at least 10 times, without ever being offered any kind of discount, or any extra time, a lunch, maybe dinner, even a cracker with a glass of water, I began to conclude that my repeat business was no more valuable than an unknown first-time client who just emailed him. So I guess I began to feel a little insulted. I asked him once (during probably the 8th or 9th appointment with him) if he'd like to have dinner before or after one of our future sessions. I explained that I had to drive over 250 miles round trip to see him, and that I'd need to eat something sometime before returning home. Of course I told him dinner would be on me. He told me that he was too busy to do that sort of thing, but thanked me for the offer.

 

Another escort (residing in the midwest and well-known here), after our very first session, and knowing I had arrived by taxi, offered to drive me back to my hotel several miles away in his own car. Nothing big, but a very kind gesture that saved me some money and was greatly appreciated (especially after the ubiquitous Somalian taxi drivers in that city get lost on a regular basis). Now that was class.

 

I subscribe to the notion that it's much easier to keep a good customer loyal and coming back, than constantly creating a new client list of people unlikely to return, especially when harder economic times hit. Sometimes you have to invest a little back into the business relationship.

[Boston Guy]

>I subscribe to the notion that it's much easier to keep a

>good customer loyal and coming back, than constantly creating

>a new client list of people unlikely to return, especially

>when harder economic times hit. Sometimes you have to invest a

>little back into the business relationship.

>

 

There's a great deal of business savvy and wisdom condensed into this one little paragraph.

 

I've hired many escorts, for lengths of time varying from an hour to a weekend, including many who I have seen repeatedly over a long period of time. The ones I choose to see again and again are without fail those who have figured out that I'm an easy sucker for a nice gesture.

 

Because I'm busy and I see guys frequently, I'm usually up for an hour appointment or sometimes two. Longer times are more likely over a vacation than being something I routinely have time for. So I see most guys for one hour or two.

 

None of the guys who I can think of right now who became regulars with me watched the clock. That doesn't mean an hour became two -- or at least not often. But it simply means it felt like we weren't rushing.

 

They also have made countless kind gestures over the years. When I was sick with the flu while on the road last winter, a regular escort was exceedingly kind and stopped by every day and some days more than once. He went to the drugstore for me, he brought food -- for which he paid and would not take reimbursement -- and was simply very kind. He would not let me pay him, simply saying "we're friends and I appreciate that you've been loyal to me."

 

In December, an escort and I went to dinner (off the clock) prior to an appointment. We had fun but, between drinks in the bar and dinner itself, we spent close to three hours at the restaurant. When it was over, we were both a little tired and he said that he felt we should call it a night. I agreed and was actually thinking the same thing myself but would not have suggested it. I dropped him off at his house and offered to pay for his time. He wouldn't hear of it, saying that I wasn't going to pay for his time after taking him to a nice dinner.

 

This kind of gesture goes a long way to build the relationship and retain my loyalty.

 

Writing this, I realize that for me it comes down to expectations. I don't expect escorts to stay longer than the allotted time, I don't expect them to offer to go out for a drink after an appointment, and I don't expect them to offer up any kind gestures outside of what we have agreed to. I hope that they expect that I will simply treat them professionally, as adults. But, being human, when either of us exceed those expectations, by our own choice, it makes the other person feel good and it just makes it more fun to get together again.

 

On the flip side, if I had seen an escort for 10 times, each time after driving 250 miles to see him, and even after the 10th time he still didn't want to take an hour and join me for a quick bite to eat, well, I don't think there'd be an 11th time. There are too many other fish in the sea.

 

BG

[Guest fukamarine]

>2. When the escort and client have crossed over that nebulous

>line to call each other "regulars", then the question becomes

>more complicated. In my business, it's common practice, indeed

>expected, that the purveyor of services entertain his/her best

>clients with lunch, dinner, a show, tickets to sporting

>events, etc.

>

>After seeing my most regular escort at least 10 times,

>without ever being offered any kind of discount, or any extra

>time, a lunch, maybe dinner, even a cracker with a glass of

>water, I began to conclude that my repeat business was no more

>valuable than an unknown first-time client who just emailed

>him.

 

Depending on an escort's background, it's quite possible thathe may never have been exposed to the generally accepted practice of the supplier giving a token of appreciation to the buyer.

 

Another reason is that he may not be a very generous person and/or was raised in a home where his parents were also not generous people.

 

A few years ago there was an escort that I had seen pretty well weekly for about a year. When Xmas rolled around he had the nerve (and he was serious) to ask me what I was getting HIM for Christmas.

I told him that it would be more appropriate if he took me out for dinner or whatever as I had contributed well over 10 grand to his income that year. He said, and I quote "You're kidding, right?" Needless to say, his 10K annual contribution from me dried up real fast.

 

fukamarine

[Guest Dan]

>

>A few years ago there was an escort that I had seen pretty

>well weekly for about a year. When Xmas rolled around he had

>the nerve (and he was serious) to ask me what I was getting

>HIM for Christmas.

>I told him that it would be more appropriate if he took me

>out for dinner or whatever as I had contributed well over 10

>grand to his income that year. He said, and I quote "You're

>kidding, right?" Needless to say, his 10K annual contribution

>from me dried up real fast.

>

>fukamarine

>

 

 

Did he at least get you something for your birthday?

 

Dan Dare

http://meetlocalmen.com/mlm/dandarela.html

[Zeek]

As I have said here before this is a great question. I went 1300 to see Benjamin Nicholas after reading his answer and we had a great evening for the cost of one hour in bed.

When I found out I was going to Denver I checked out the escort and when I ask if dinner was on or off the clock they told me I should look for someone else, if I had to ask a question like that. I was able to pick up Drew Peters at a Bar and we had an awesome evening together and I did not have to ask.

I was with an escort a month ago and ask if he would like to get a bit to eat and he told me he had 8 clients he was seeing that day. That was my last time to see him

I have found a badpuppy boy, Bastian Sturn, living close to me and after our first time together he has givin me a great price and even spends the day (and night) with me. That is my kind of escort. I guess I want to be more than one hour client.

I know some escort do it for the money, some for the sex and some for the real reason escort should be in the bussines, everything else.

[Guest pecsr4me]

I've been seeing an escort for a little over 6 months, and quite frequently. The relation has developed into something laid back and comfortable for both of us. We enjoy each other's company and in between visits, we call on the phone just to say 'hi', keeping in touch. And he's been nice to ask for a reasonable fee.

 

It's my feeling, however, since we do frequent visits and he gets a decent fee when we spend a night or weekend together, when we go out for breakfast the next morning a nice gesture would be to pick up the tab for a $10 breakfast. That won't break him or cut into his fee all that much since we usually go to one of those national pancake chain diners.

 

On the flip side, $10 won't break me either, but I think it's a way for the escort to silently show that just possibly he really enjoys both the time and the company he's with, and willing to offer this "extra" gesture.

 

A few times when I've met an escort after the first time and suggest dinner, they accept and it's "off the clock". Another nice gesture in my book!

[Guest sdmuscl4hire]

I thought we just got paid for sex. Dinner is like a major bonus to us hookers being homeless, hungry and all. Thank you kind sir

 

: )

[VaHawk]

And you Sir are True Class all the way!!!!! http://64.207.13.28/mysmilies/otn/party/beerchug.gif

[jackhammer91406]

Michael,

Nice to see you back on the board. We have missed your input.

 

;-)

[dick_nyc]

Interesting that you should mention this. I just contacted an escort in South America (Argentina) and asked him for some ideas as to hotels, sight seeing, etc. He volunteered to help me find a hotel and he would take me around the city to see the sights. He quoted a price on the sightseeing and a price on the "companionship" and mentioned he would take care of his own meals. It seemed to me to be a win-win situation if we get along as well in person as we do through the emails.

[Guest ClevelandScort]

I thought I'd weigh in on this. I have dealt with this situation.

 

Communication is key. Ask your escort if it can be off-the-clock BEFORE making dinner plans. Also, get reassurance from the escort that he will look presentable at the restaurant you choose if he has given you cause for concern.

 

I always welcome an offer for dinner. I haven't been offended when my clients have asked that dinner be off-the-clock. I have always agreed, and they appreciate it, knowing that others would not. It's a great opportunity to share things about ourselves without feeling rushed. It's also a opportunity to get some inspiration for cooking at home. I watch Food Network a lot to get inspiration, but don't want to be getting all my inspiration from the chefs on TV.

 

I just read a discussion about escorts showing up for appointments in tank-top-and-baseball-cap. That may be okay for a meeting with a client that doesn't involve dinner (though is never the way I choose to appear for a client). Some escorts may not be aware that they need to look presentable when going out to dinner to not cause discomfort for their clients, so by all means if you have cause for concern get your reassurance that he will look presentable BEFORE making plans. This is not a cause for concern with my clients, as I always look presentable when meeting with them, regardless of whether we are going to dinner. The sloppy look seems to have become de rigueur these days, all over the US, but I will never succumb. My clients are even welcome to state how they wants me to dress for them. Not all escorts share this attitude regarding the importance of looking presentable, though, so be sure to get your reassurance beforehand if it's an issue for you.

 

Best regards, all.

 

David

[Will]

Perhaps somebody's already said this in one of the many posts to this thread, but perhaps it also bears repeating.

 

Because of where I live, almost all my escort contacts are from a long distance. Geography makes it unlikely that I would ever have the opportunity to invite an escort into my house, although there are several whom I'd be glad to entertain. Therefore, the only acquaintance I have with with a first-time escort is via e-mail or phone; and despite the fact that you can tell a lot about a person that way, for me it's not enough. So I always like to have some kind of get-acquainted period beforehand, and that includes lunch or dinner. I tell the escort what I have in mind -- for instance, dinner at 7:30, followed by a date, the whole evening to end by 11:00 -- and ask him what the fee will be. That way, both of us know ahead of time exactly what's expected and what it will cost.

 

If the escort is local, I invite him to lunch on the clock, but with no plans for afterwards. That way, I can decide whether I want to go forward with that particular escort; but I don't think it's fair to "interview" him over dinner unless I pay him for his time.

 

Rick Munroe is, of course, right that dinner with a total stranger is not the same as dinner at home or with your best friend. But the same is as true for the client as for the escort. I doubt that I'm the only client who feels nervous on meeting a new escort for the first time. I want to make a good impression; I want to feel that he actually likes me (I have been well educated by the escorts who post here that clients are almost NEVER actually "desirable"), because I know that I'm likeable if not desirable. I also doubt that I'm the only client here who does not have bottomless pockets that allow me to rent boys with the carefree ease that I might go to the movies.

 

For me, hiring an escort is a Big Deal, emotionally and financially. It is not something I do carelessly or lightly; I treat escorts with exactly the same courtesy and respect that I extend towards anybody, and I expect him to do the same. Thus, I'd hope that no escort would regard dinner with me as a chore, once he'd had his dessert and coffee. Yes, he might be a little anxious going into it; but so will I. Two human beings who share a meal, whatever their relationship, are sharing something both important and intimate. I think they are equally responsible to make the most of it, regardless of who's paying whom for what.

[Guest lieut_kije]

When I hire a person for any kind of service, it's an admission on my part that I am in some manner "less able" to perform the service myself or, for recreational activities, get someone of the desired skill level to do it with me for free. It was of course tough on my ego to admit that as an arguably average looking guy with average sexual abilities that I would have to pay to have men of my dreams make "love" to me.

 

I mean no offense, but I certainly am not going to admit that an escort, even a stud who is great in bed, is superior to me in conversational skills that I need to pay for purely social interaction. Of course the escort probably isn't interested in spending social time with me for free because a) he's busy and b) I bore him. But I am also busy and if I bore him, he probably would bore me as well. I don't need friends or dinner partners that are good looking; I want ones that I have stuff in common with where we both enjoy each others company. I'm into wind surfing and classical music. If someone likes the same, he can wear a dress and be as ugly as can be for all I care.

 

But there's another reason I don't want to socialize with an escort and it's the same reason I never want to meet any of the pro bodybuilders I fantasize over. And that is I build up a fantasy of what the guy is really like and if I socialize with the guy, encountering the reality will likely spoil my fantasies. I probably wouldn't be interested in the guy afterwards and miss out on some great sex in the future.

 

I suppose I'm guilty of treating beautiful men as sex objects. I'm only vulnerable when it turns out that that gorgeous hunk is also a great human being and can play "drop the needle" on all nine Beethoven symphonies.

[dick_nyc]

I just spoke with an escort in Ft Lauderdale about this very subject and he said that he would charge one rate for all action and a different rate for the hours we had dinner (much cheaper), all this without my even asking. It would be a very good idea to ask the escort especially if he is someone you would actually like to see in a social milieu. This one happens to be that type of escort and I would be very proud to be with him at dinner. I'm really looking forward to the whole situation!

[Guest Timtx76116]

Me and my guys never charge for dinner if the client is paying.

 

Tim H.

"The little whore house on the prarie"

 

Where you are NEVER asked for deposits or to pay before you play.

[Chuck50]

When all eslse fails ask him what the story is. Then you will know what his policy is as it is different I am sure from scort to scort. HUGS Chuck

[VaHawk]

I think I LIKE YOU AND YOUR BOYS!!! Are ya'll for real now? The only bad thing about Dallas, is the Cowboys.

[Guest sdmuscl4hire]

just taking this as a compliment for lack of enthusiasim to wonder if it wasnt

[jackhammer91406]

The other day a well known (and loved) escort invited me to meet with him for lunch. I am not sure if the invitation was in response to the "friends" thread or not. I won't identify him without his permission, and while I have had email (and thread) correspondence with him before, it wasn't in preparation for hiring him as most of my email correspondence is with other escorts. in fact when i got his email, I thought maybe he was joking and I said so in my reply. Turns out he wasn't. We met at a local cafe in WEHO and had a very nice lunch. The conversation touched on many topics, but none about hiring specifically. It was just nice to spend some time meeting a new person, (making gay friends is an important part of the process I am going through right now). He was friendly (without being "ON") and very nice to spend time with. Although I had other appointments (business) scheduled for that afternoon and I had to rush, I got the impression that we might get together again sometime for a meal, or movie, or even cards. As a result of this meeting, I am more likely to hire this guy in the future, not because our types match up (we are both tops) but because he is a nice, considerate guy and I would enjoy spending some sexual time with him.

Regardless of what happens, it was a kind gesture on his part, and one I am not likely to forget if and when the time comes to pay back a kindness with a kindness.

 

So I guess I might have been wrong in my postings on the friends thread. We will see.

 

 

 

[+ glutes]

This item needs to be worked out between both parties.

However while at a foreign bordello sometime ago, I chose a escort and the madame informed me that no suite was available - "Why don't you have a drink at the bar with X?". I was not quite for it (did not like their booze), and offered to take 'X' to the bar next door for a half-hour til a suite was available.

Can you believe I was billed for the 1/2 hour???

(After much protesting, it was given back)

[TightBodyTouch]

After much debate here I'm sure that most people agree that whether dinner is on the clock or not is an issue to be designated and determined between escort and client and possibly some escorts even handle the issue exclusive to each encounter. I won't go on as the topic has lingered here for a long time and I personally have never had a problem coordinating my plans with my clients.

 

I do find it laughable however that you found surprise in the situation you described in the last post. If you were in a bordello, occupying a boy's time (in fact, taking him from the establishment) why on earth shouldn't you expect to be billed for the time? Maybe an escort working inependent of an agency or outside of a brothel can make his own desicion whether he can run away for drinks with you but it sounds like you fucked with their system and I'm surprised the madame gave your money back. I wonder if a pimp hustling his boys would have given you the same consideration. Be careful of the choices you make and good luck with any future dinner dates.

[+ glutes]

>Maybe an escort working inependent of an agency

>or outside of a brothel can make his own desicion whether he

>can run away for drinks with you but it sounds like you fucked

>with their system and I'm surprised the madame gave your money

>back. I wonder if a pimp hustling his boys would have given

>you the same consideration. Be careful of the choices you make

>and good luck with any future dinner dates.

 

I respectfully disagree here TJ.

There was no suite available for our session, so the madame (not wanting to lose business) wanted me to stay and have a drink with Mr. X. But he should have forewarned me it was 'on the clock', I assumed it wasn't (see above).

The madame having known me from the past as a good client gave me a credit for the next appointment.

Chalk it up to poor communication, I just want fellow posters to be clear on the terms, whether a drink or dinner. Everyone left happy ncluding Mr. X, he received a nice tip!!

[TightBodyTouch]

Okay Okay Okay... so you had drinks with this boy "X" and not dinner. Then why did you offer your remarks where the discussion was clearly regarding rates for a dinner date?

 

Though inappropriately entered, I still find trouble believing your surprise in paying for the boy's accompaniment. But I won't mention it anymore because I don't like to repeat myself...

 

riiiight }(