Wasting Time 2.0

[+ DrownedBoy]

Whoa Whoa whoa, let's back up. One question at a time. If we answer the first question, that'll kinda help answer all the others. How much time do you spend waiting? Well how much time did you agree to? Do you tell them, "if I don't hear from you by 6 pm Friday, I'll assume you have other things to tend to"? If not, you should. If they don't reply, you know what to do

 

The only time I did this, the provider later said he was with another client, then shot back with the "if you send an ultimatum I don't want you as a customer."

 

Personally, I thought that was a good honest response. If a provider marks himself Available Now when he's not (as in working with s different client), he's being unprofessional, and I have no use for him.

[+ DrownedBoy]

Whoa Whoa whoa, let's back up. One question at a time. If we answer the first question, that'll kinda help answer all the others. How much time do you spend waiting? Well how much time did you agree to? Do you tell them, "if I don't hear from you by 6 pm Friday, I'll assume you have other things to tend to"? If not, you should. If they don't reply, you know what to do

 

The only time I did this, the provider later said he was with another client, then shot back with the "if you send an ultimatum I don't want you as a customer."

 

Personally, I thought that was a good honest response. If a provider marks himself Available Now when he's not (as in working with s different client), he's being unprofessional, and I have no use for him.

[xyz48B]

I guess I’ve thought of “Available Now” as less about right now as opposed to more generally providing service during this period of time.

[Shawn Monroe]

I couldn’t think of how to properly word this, but you worded it perfectly.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

The only time I did this, the provider later said he was with another client, then shot back with the "if you send an ultimatum I don't want you as a customer."

 

Personally, I thought that was a good honest response. If a provider marks himself Available Now when he's not (as in working with s different client), he's being unprofessional, and I have no use for him.

 

Well in my case I wasn’t using it as an ultimatum. And I can see 100% where he’s coming from. That’s why I worded it careful: if I don't hear from you by 6 pm Friday, I'll assume you have other things to tend to". Instead of something like, “I’ll call someone else if I don’t hear back by 6 pm Friday.”

 

That way there’s no ultimatum being made. It’s just stating a deadline that someone needs to know something by, and if not...that takes out the guesswork or wondering and waiting. But the point is, to at least SAY it. I hate when people ask me about appointments in advance, and then I may need a day or 2 to think about whether I can accommodate, and when I get back I get told they made other plans because THEY THOUGHT I wasn’t interested.

 

To avoid that I try to just respond anyway, and try to let them know I am interested to meet, but need more time to get back and let them know if I can do it.

 

And also, “available now” has been spoken of before. Yes, if you are with a client...turn off available now. That’s not fair. But...it doesn’t always mean “available right now”.

 

It’s like when an apartment is for rent, or a mechanic shop is open. It doesn’t mean you rent it right that second. Nor that your car is immediately going to get taken into the service bay. It just means available to “be available”.

Edited June 19, 2020 by Jarrod_Uncut

[sexymonk]

It is a sad phenomenon and you are right about it. It is just courtesy to politely decline and move on. You have no idea, how often that actually happens on the clients' side as well. I can only speak for myself and unless your messages are not rude or demeaning by nature, I always respond to everyone. Bottom line, it is much better that this sort of behavior (whether client or escort side) happens PRIOR to you paying out your hard-earned money to someone who reciprocates it with lack of courtesy, professionalism, and disrespect.

That is why it is better to meet same person again and again. Even if things go wrong or delay is expected then due to trust developed things don’t end in south direction. But whatever is the situation, a clear timely communication helps everyone. Don’t assume or hide things, just be clear, upfront and wise people will understand situation.

[xyz48B]

Mutual respect goes a long way…Sadly, respect seems a rare commodity today.

 

I wonder if there’s a direct relationship between an escort’s willingness to engage in pre-meeting conversation and cost? Likewise, I wonder if there’s a direct relationship between a client’s desire to engage in pre-meeting conversation and willingness to spend. For me, if an escort is willing to communicate respectfully and completely before meeting, I’m much more apt to tip more than I normally would. It predisposes me to view them as valuing me...at least as a client and what I “offer.” Providers, in any business, can only get what clients are willing to give.

 

The economics and sociology of this hobby is on some level very fascinating to me...

[Jarrod_Uncut]

Mutual respect goes a long way…Sadly, respect seems a rare commodity today.

 

I wonder if there’s a direct relationship between an escort’s willingness to engage in pre-meeting conversation and cost? Likewise, I wonder if there’s a direct relationship between a client’s desire to engage in pre-meeting conversation and willingness to spend. For me, if an escort is willing to communicate respectfully and completely before meeting, I’m much more apt to tip more than I normally would. It predisposes me to view them as valuing me...at least as a client and what I “offer.” Providers, in any business, can only get what clients are willing to give.

 

The economics and sociology of this hobby is on some level very fascinating to me...

 

Definitely.

 

However with me, I have moved away from a lot of the chit chat. Not that I don't like to, but in the past have not had people respect my time. Nowadays I never answer phone calls without the client having an appointment made and confirmed.

 

People don't understand that chat time is money time. I've been bamboozled into engaging in explicit or promising phone chats, only to be cancelled on. So if anyone wishes to chat, I just ask for $50+ deposit towards the session. That's not asking a lot. Our ads and pics and videos pretty much do all the pre-workout for us.

[xyz48B]

@Jarrod_Uncut – that seems fair. It really boils down to expectations. Which, paradoxically, leaves both client and provider frustrated if communication isn’t open and free flowing, at least initially.

 

To put things another way, I’m likely to think more than twice if a provider puts something about wasting his time in his ad. Already he seems, to me, to approach possible clients with skepticism; I start out handicapped in the communication arena. I don’t set out to waste time soI don’t need to be told not to do it before we even communicate.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

@Jarrod_Uncut – that seems fair. It really boils down to expectations. Which, paradoxically, leaves both client and provider frustrated if communication isn’t open and free flowing, at least initially.

 

To put things another way, I’m likely to think more than twice if a provider puts something about wasting his time in his ad. Already he seems, to me, to approach possible clients with skepticism; I start out handicapped in the communication arena. I don’t set out to waste time soI don’t need to be told not to do it before we even communicate.

 

Well remember, which came first the chicken or the egg, right? It's not that a provider who states don't waste my time, is approaching clients with skepticism. They obviously didn't start having their time wasted on their own. Obviously there must have been some experiences to make them feel that way.

 

You may not start out to waste time. But also in that case, you are not personally being told not to waste time. It's an ad. It's being directed at all. Fact is though, you wouldn't always know what a provider may deal with in terms of having their time wasted.

 

Like I say, I personally don't mind communication...but I can't extend the same priority to every person who contacts me, else I would be burning thru lot of time and setting myself up for disappointment. I obviously have to reserve that for confirmed clients.

 

I know for me: I've not had but 1 client in my area show up last week (a regular). All replies were either from guys in the next big city over, or local timewasters who hit me up on Rentmen messenger but never followed directions to contact by phone. Or just general Kansas City inquiries, who are some of the biggest timewasters of all markets, but also similar to Tampa, Raleigh, and few other places that I wouldn't care to name.

 

So, I really want to say "don't waste my time" when contacting me, but it's part of why with deposits... the ones who aren't serious won't generally get past that anyway.

Edited June 21, 2020 by Jarrod_Uncut

[xyz48B]

I think the deposit route might actually be part of the solution. Everyone can know there’s some level of commitment beyond literal jackoffs who are bona fide time wasters for the escort. Likewise, the client has some sense that the escort is committed. My own experience has been that providers can be just as flakey, only in a different way, as you describe some clients. Just because you put an ad up with “available now” doesn’t mean you’re serious.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

I think the deposit route might actually be part of the solution. Everyone can know there’s some level of commitment beyond literal jackoffs who are bona fide time wasters for the escort. Likewise, the client has some sense that the escort is committed. My own experience has been that providers can be just as flakey, only in a different way, as you describe some clients. Just because you put an ad up with “available now” doesn’t mean you’re serious.

 

Exactly, and that’s what I had someone tell a client today also: just because someone has a RentMasseur ad doesn’t make them real either.

 

This is after he claims to have been burnt sending deposits to other escorts. I dislike when people say that because it’s like, what does that have to do with me? It’s no different than if the provider wasn’t their real pics, didn’t perform as expected, or had a place in the worst part of town instead of an prestigious area of town.

 

I tell em, did you even check if the person was reviewed?

[maninsoma]

I think the deposit route might actually be part of the solution. Everyone can know there’s some level of commitment beyond literal jackoffs who are bona fide time wasters for the escort. Likewise, the client has some sense that the escort is committed. My own experience has been that providers can be just as flakey, only in a different way, as you describe some clients. Just because you put an ad up with “available now” doesn’t mean you’re serious.

 

You must be joking. An escort asking for a deposit for a simple 1-hour appointment is not communicating commitment since, as many posts over the years here will tell you, a lot of clients have paid up front and been ripped off and there are a lot of escorts with stellar reputations who don't ask for money up front. It's up to each client whether he's willing to pay a deposit up front, but I think that apart from longer engagements the majority view requests for money up front as a deal breaker. The reverse is definitely true, though: I don't think a client is going to send payment in advance if he isn't serious about keeping an appointment.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

You must be joking. An escort asking for a deposit for a simple 1-hour appointment is not communicating commitment since, as many posts over the years here will tell you, a lot of clients have paid up front and been ripped off and there are a lot of escorts with stellar reputations who don't ask for money up front. It's up to each client whether he's willing to pay a deposit up front, but I think that apart from longer engagements the majority view requests for money up front as a deal breaker. The reverse is definitely true, though: I don't think a client is going to send payment in advance if he isn't serious about keeping an appointment.

 

I've found even having something like a $10 deposit helps, if it's just for short hourly session. Again, even if someone has been ripped off before by sending a deposit, they also may only deal with that once in a blue, whereas we tend to take on requests several times throughout the week.

 

My question: what would you suggest to be an alternative? Especially if say: the escort only books by advanced or notice appointment only (versus the, are you available now brigade), and each time a client doesn't keep an arrangement, various levels of inconveniences can occur?

 

There's really nothing to argue about. If a client chooses to contact a particular provider, they have to be willing to yield to the protocols and order they have established. They wouldn't go walk up in a business and tell them what to do? It's like auto mechanic shops: many charge a diagnostic fee, many don't. You can't moan at BMW to not charge a diagnostic fee, just because the other shop down the street doesn't.

 

At the end of the day, it's our business. I don't like when someone contacts me, and tells me how to run things. The problem is, these people have control issues. And some have the audacity to call shots when they've not even contributed anything.

[xyz48B]

There's really nothing to argue about. If a client chooses to contact a particular provider, they have to be willing to yield to the protocols and order they have established. They wouldn't go walk up in a business and tell them what to do? It's like auto mechanic shops: many charge a diagnostic fee, many don't. You can't moan at BMW to not charge a diagnostic fee, just because the other shop down the street doesn't.

That’s totally true. And I support you 100% on requiring a deposit. But I also can say that if a would-be client chooses not to engage with you over a deposit requirement, that’s also not terrible. It’s the market, after all. You may be BMW who requires a fee but I can take my Toyota to the Ford dealership if I so choose if they don’t require a fee. You as a provider can’t complain if clients take their business elsewhere if they don’t like your model and have access to one they prefer better.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

That’s totally true. And I support you 100% on requiring a deposit. But I also can say that if a would-be client chooses not to engage with you over a deposit requirement, that’s also not terrible. It’s the market, after all. You may be BMW who requires a fee but I can take my Toyota to the Ford dealership if I so choose if they don’t require a fee. You as a provider can’t complain if clients take their business elsewhere if they don’t like your model and have access to one they prefer better.

 

Well that's why I have asked Rentmen to do their part as well. If deposits are going to become too much to ask of, then we need some other way to have an idea to know whether a client is going to be invested in us. Like I say, maybe get rid of client "memberships" that only put more money in their account, and instead have clients purchase their communications with us. And put the money into our bank account or Rentmen account to use towards things like platinum boost

[xyz48B]

There’s always a cost to the provider (any market) to do business. Maximizing your cost benefit is an obvious desire but there’s always a cost to doing business.

[+ Coolwave35]

I always ask in my initial contact if Now is a good time to work out an arrangement, or If there’s a better time to connect to work out logistics. More than half send a quick note that now isn’t a good time, and counter with a more appropriate time that they’ll be less distracted. Then it’s usually smooth sailing and we coast into a meeting that works for both of us.

[marylander1940]

Why is the escort’s time assumed to be the only guy’s time of value? I get that a lot of so-called clients aren’t serious so there’s a desire to want to ward against that, but when I messages a provider and he messages back with nothing of real value (Hi, hey, yeah, etc) and I follow up to no response, it’s a waste of my time too…How long do you hold out on a potential provider who’s “busy” before you determine he’s a waste of time? Also – is it too much to expect a guy to say outright he’s not interested instead of “ghosting” (not sure it’s ghosting in this business, but you know what I mean...)

 

I’m posting here because I’d also like to get escorts’ take on this too. Perhaps I’m not seeing all sides of this.

 

I was considering something...

 

Some guys almost exclusively hire for 1-hr or 2-hr sessions where the objective is to fuck and part. There isn’t a lot of reason for client or provider to worry about the other’s history or background etc. Unless there’s some sort of fantasy or fetish or something that’s going to be worked out, there’s not a lot to hammer out beyond time, place, rate, and who’s topping and bottoming. Right?

 

Then some guys want more. They may book for a longer time – overnight, weekend, a week, etc. They’re looking for a BFE. Something beyond dick in, dick out. The “connection” is important here.

 

We spend time on this forum talking about escorts who feel their time is wasted by clients, including clients who want to “text constantly.” Now, I can see how that could be a problem. The escort does have a life and does have other responsibilities to attend to, no doubt. We all do. But it occurred to me when booking for a BFE, it seems that a certain amount of getting to know each other before you meet isn’t unreasonable. *snark on* If indeed payment is for time, then am I the client also expected to pay for the time needed to get to know each other for an enjoyable, believable BFE?

 

I’ve had escorts who are good about chitchat texting before we meet. And my experience has been that the BFEs are so, so much better with the guys who make that little investment outside the physical time together. If the client’s pleasure is the top priority, as so many guys advertise, it would seem they would build into their business model and expectation time to make that pleasure for a BFE. If not, don’t advertise BFEs and stick to the shorter sessions that don’t require the same kind of prep.

 

Aside – so help me God, if @marylander1940 tries to “move” this thread...

 

This seems to be a recurrent subject for you. Are you wasting their time or are they wasting yours?

 

Same name and same subject? You just moved it from the Deli to the Lounge.

[xyz48B]

Are you wasting their time or are they wasting yours?

Is it possible to waste a client’s time? I was thinking about it. Is that a sin?

 

Were you a researcher before retirement?

 

You’re one to talk about “recurrent subjects.”

[Guest leftbench23]

What about when you book a 6pm appointment, in form the guy you are in the lobby at 6:01pm, and he says he’s finally ready at 6:22pm? I left at 6:15pm.

 

who wasted whose time here?

[marylander1940]

Is it possible to waste a client’s time? I was thinking about it. Is that a sin?

 

Were you a researcher before retirement?

 

You’re one to talk about “recurrent subjects.”

 

Actually you're confusing clients and potential clients.

 

Unfortunately in all activities some folks don't know what they're looking for, they shop around, want to get a bargain, etc.

 

Sin? We're talking about hiring, for some that's always a sin.

 

2 threads same name...

[TT3690]

Actually you're confusing clients and potential clients.

 

Unfortunately in all activities some folks don't know what they're looking for, they shop around, want to get a bargain, etc.

 

Sin? We're talking about hiring, for some that's always a sin.

 

2 threads same name...

 

Is it really a problem to 'shop around'? I find that unless I'm contacting a regular, I usually want to contact multiple providers because some won't respond at all, some will be incompatible with what I'm looking for or timing or location etc. If I waited days for one provider to respond like some people are suggesting, there's a good chance I wouldn't end up booked with anyone for that weekend at all.

[marylander1940]

Is it really a problem to 'shop around'? I find that unless I'm contacting a regular, I usually want to contact multiple providers because some won't respond at all, some will be incompatible with what I'm looking for or timing or location etc. If I waited days for one provider to respond like some people are suggesting, there's a good chance I wouldn't end up booked with anyone for that weekend at all.

 

No... and I never said shopping around was a problem it's part of life.

 

Don't wait days for a provider to reply, just move on... even if he's with a client he can text you back when he's alone.

 

My word my bond should go both ways.

Edited November 29, 2020 by marylander1940

[xyz48B]

Is it really a problem to 'shop around'

No.