Piss and Poop

[buttnovice]

Hey, Sorry for the fowl title but I have two curiosities:

 

1) Why is it whenever I'm in an airplane lav, I have a split stream when I pee? I'm talking a side show at the BelAggio. I shut down, and flow again, and sometimes I still hit the floor, etc. Why the split stream, and how to prevent it?

 

2) Do you ever have one of those craps when you think you've laid the foundation for a skyscraper. . . . only to see nothing in the bowl? I mean, where did it go?

 

Don't mean to be gross, but what the hell. . . . how does it happen?

[Guest zipperzone]

What a class act you turned out to be.

 

If there is anyplace here for this post (and frankly I seriously doubt that there is) might I suggest the fetish forum.

[raulgmanzo]

The split stream could be caused by a temporary blockage or deformation of your urethral opening. This could be caused by a bunch of different things from various STDs and urinary tract infections to some cum that has dried. Or the skin on the sides of your urethral opening simply sticking together because you scrunched your dick between your legs really hard because you are nervous about flying.

 

Some people experience this upon waking after a nocturnal emission which has since dried. Perhaps flying gets you so excited that you ooze?

 

The solution might be to give the head of your cock a little squeeze and roll between your fingers to break up any obstruction or clean with some water so that your urethral opening is nice and clear.

 

But maybe you should ask your doctor just in case you have a bladder or urethra infection. Or an STD causing a discharge.

Why that would happen when flying I don't know.

 

Any sexually active person should get tested for STDs and at least once in a while get swabbed in one or more of your anus, urethra, and throat.

 

I don't have a clue about your missing foundation. Maybe gas?

[Luv2play]

In reply to your 2, I think the law of aerodynamics applies here. I too have observed this from time to time and I believe what accounts for the disappearance is the shape and force with which the turd hits the water in the bowl. Like a torpedo, it has sufficient force to "flush itself", so to speak. Curious, isn't it? Of course, the design of the toilet bowl has something to do with it as well. It wouldn't work in some. And of course, you can't make it happen. It just sometimes does when all the conditions are propitious. Hope that answers your "foul" question.

[+ deej]

>In reply to your 2,

 

You got a license for that pun, mister? ;-)

[Guest]

If the urinary stream sprays/splits only when you're on the airplane, and then goes back to normal afterwards, it's obviously not an infection, nor anything else to worry about. This, of course, assumes you have no problem getting your urine out at other times. Since this happens only when you're on airplanes, as you say, the cause has to be something unique to airplane travel. You'll have to think yourself harder as to what is unique to you about airplane travel. Do you hold it in longer? Take certain meds beforehand (i.e. Benadryl could weaken the stream)? Another possible explanation, if flying makes you nervous, is that your sympathetic (i.e. adrenaline-like) nervous system partially inhibits your bladder outlet.

But again, if this only happens on planes and you're fine at other times, don't go to your doctor unless you want him to think you're an idiot. It reminds me of the cartoon where the patient asks the doctor: "Whenever I hold the toaster while I sit in a bucket of salt water, I get a buzzing sensation on my tongue. What's wrong with me?" The doctor replies "You have too much time on your hands.":+

[Guest skrubber]

Although I fly frequently I have NEVER used the john on an airplane. I find that if I relieve myself at the airport before flight I am quite fine during the flight. So I have no answer to your question and am now wondering about the point to my post.

[buttnovice]

Hey all. . . Buttnovice here, back in a flush!

 

Sorry Zipperzone to have let you down. Just tried to get some information tempered with a little humor.

 

My #1 question does not happen only in the air (no pun) but I seem to notice is more on airplanes when you have no room to move when you're standing up with the seat up. So this is not unique to the friendly skies. I mostly sit at home but stand in public, and that is when I notice the occasional mighty river going off into 2 streams. Thanks for all your responses.

 

Now for #2 and the mystery disappearance of the stinky steamers.

 

BN