TallMuscl37

That is the appropriate gesture to do, and I wish this concept would spread to more guys who patronize online sex workers. Unfortunently, there’s a lot of people out here who...they don’t see us as individuals. They look at us in the eyes of other “bills”, e.g. they didn’t use the service therefore they aren’t going to pay for it. And I had to explain to 2 people earlier this week: “You made an expectation that I was going to be paid, you had schedule changes that was outside of my control and had to cancel the deal you offered. Therefore, why should I have to be duped out of something I expected, just because YOU didn’t ensure your schedule would allow for this, BEFORE you contacted me”. So, out of courtesy and integrity, do right by me and give me something to offset the lost income. Lot of people will argue over that, others I hardly have to explain it. But lately it’s been a lot more people needing it explained, and it’s been a wild ride in 2020. And I’m ready to jump on the next bus: That said, I did go ahead and renew 1 other ad this month, just because now Christmas is going to be over by the end of the week. Obviously it’s going to be a long weekend, but since it is on a Friday, there will be the opportunity to jump off at the new start of the week. Also like @marylander1940 said, I know people are going to be looking and possibly booking for January. However, I’m probably am going to turn my phone off from Christmas night thru Sunday.

Using these quotes from another thread as examples. I want to say let’s pretend Covid doesn’t exist, and people would be busy anyway...but since it is existent, it is obviously like 2 gargantuan vacations at once:

I’m doing that already thru my Just For Fans page At the end of the day though, selling videos doesn’t match a $250 or $300 appointment. I do still refer missed connections to my JFF, but sometimes if I feel there was an expectation made to be paid for a session, I prefer to be at least partially reimbursed for the session...and then I’ll send them a free subscription to my videos.

Well remember: one can still pay for an ad, and then freeze it, and pick up where they left off. E.g. if I have 17 days left, I can freeze til January 2nd, and still have 17 days left. I renewed my ad last Sunday (and you stand correct, I did get a client from it the same day). It’s part of RentMen’s Covid safe mode. And yes, by technicality it’s only $80 a month...but it’s not just the price point that matters. It’s the fact that spending a lot of leg work responding to inquiries when guys are either: A) using the platform to kill time/boredom between family/down time from work (which usually results in last minute cancels or no call/no show) B) making appointment requests, but then they having to cancel due to “my mom/kids/wife/hubby/Mary Poppins” showed up or “work is crazy this time C) letting paid ad time go un-used because nobody is contacting to begin with. When it could be put on hold and places during a more opportunistic period. So after a few days or couple of weeks of the above, I’ve lost any holiday spirit I could conjure up. Worn down from getting my hopes up, and really just want to either freeze my ads or take down my number (which I’ve often had to do on 4th of July, Thanksgiving, and likely Christmas and New Year’s next). Memorial and Labor Day or more of the same, except it’s not as lingering as the winter holidays. Just today I had to explain to 2 individuals, as to why they should be compensating me for having to re-neg and cancel their appointment requests (Both which were faults of their own and nothing I was aware of). I said, out of courtesy, you should have the integrity to pay me for the expected earnings that you created, since you had to cancel for reasons that weren’t discussed at time of booking (one said work/kids, the other said work flying him out early to save the company money). They wanted to reason and say that I’m not worth $50-100 just to text about stuff. I had to remind them: I am 1 person, not a big company with multiple employees and customers. If you contact me and have me spending my time coordinating schedules, packing bags, thinking of ways to try and make it work and they fall thru...I don’t get paid. And I also told them: that Rentmen ad you contacted me on; costs me money. This phone you texting me on; costs money. The car I would drive and the hotel I would book; costs money. So don’t tell me that my time spent arranging an appointment that YOU initiated isn’t worth being paid for. Some guys are even sending me pictures of themselves, and still not following thru. That is asking a lot considering I would spend more time exchanging messages with people, than actually meeting people if I didn’t have a deposit strategy.

I can imagine things being different in Ontario. I’ve had a client visit me in Detroit from there. I try to post up because I do know there’s a select few looking for a bit of holiday “fun” and getting a break, and I did score a 2 hour appointment on that last one I mentioned. But since then it’s already been a couple locally and out of town that have fell thru or not returned messages. I did however meet with another escort friend and filmed some content, but even though he had 5 or 6 no shows, he did still manage to score 3 other clients in the area. At this rate, I’ve decided to just pull all my nearby city locations and stay local til end of month because I had packed up to go to 2 places within 3 hour drive, yet had appointments in both locations not go thru. Both citing either family or work conflicts.

Not to mention but there was an article citing the “meat” had extreme levels of estrogen as well. Pizza Hut has also come out with an impossible sausage pizza. I’m just not a fan of vegan meats though. When I want vegetables, I gladly add them to my burgers and pizza.

I’m hoping this doesn’t ruffle any feathers... or invite unnecessary judgement (hint, hint) but I feel like many years, I always find myself regretting advertising around holidays and not having another “holiday” gig: namely the Thanksgiving thru New Years ones. This year has been no different. And due to personal things coming up, it always seems like trying to have a proper job around the holidays never pans out. At this point I was only able to keep 1 or 2 ads running. So far, all it’s been are possibilities and scheduled visits that fall thru for whatever reason. Usually work or schedule or something else that comes up on their end. I’ve been trying my hardest to get bookings, yet thus far it’s already been 8 days since my last appointment. I’m answering texts and coordinating appointments, yet not generating the revenue. Considering it wasn’t as busy going into the holidays, I didn’t have as much of a cushion to “go on vacation” for the remainder of the year anyway.

That’s true, and it’s not just “drug” drugs either. It’s anti depressants, stimulants, and anything else. Being on drugs isn’t just limited to street drugs or illegal narcs. I been seeing a guy who I recently found out takes aderall (however it’s spelled). Before that it was anti-depressants. The level of disorder and chaos in his home was so severe, it bordered on unsanitary living conditions. I been helping to get it looking like a home again, but I had a talk with him yesterday and will again later. However I have noticed improvements since he got off the anti-D’s And sadly yes, a lot of our men are on drugs or alcoholics. I think instead of saying, “well all my friends are gay and don’t do XYZ”, we all need to look at the issue as truth in the matter. And that’s not being judgemental: I know many successful gay men who PNP every once in awhile. “Weekend warriors” so to speak. But not everybody who does them has it together, or keeps it together. The majority of gay men who are on drugs are caught up in the lifestyle. And they’re so deep in, they can’t function without it.

That reminds me I should get back on scruff. Grindr just sucks all the way around for trying to get biz. But I do remember scruff getting tedious at various points as well. Might of gotten warned or banned here and there after discussing biz on the site. So you're right to just leave a number and keep it moving. I feel Adam 4 Adam has fucked themselves over again by changing their city locator feature.I've wrote to them before that the county listing sounds ridiculous, almost like a sheriff or police department at that. They haven't changed it. But I noticed biz from the site is continued to be deader and deader. Can't even recall the last time I've gotten a serious client from there. Maybe back in October. My ad just expired this week, probably won't renew until next year. Hell, I may just be done with it period. Only seems to work well in a select few markets, or if you keep steady interaction on it... sometimes I've found contacting random guys directly helps.

I wouldn't say that. But there are stories of Instagram model's pics being used on Rentmen...and the person behind it not being the guy in the photos

Not so quick to rejoice though: It was case of, as @Benjamin_Nicholas once described: throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Yes, they weren't the best sites BUT...I met a plethora of good guys thru BP and CL. Oftentimes for the same rates that i can ask on Rentmen. Remember: they didn't go away by popular demand. They were forced closed or intimidated to close by the government...aka, land of the not so free: as a result of the continued criminalization of sex work. That's also why rentboy, men 4 rent and hour boy also went under.

I could not have said it better...

I could not have said it better...

yeah and you so “attractive”, the escort doesn’t even want you to show face around his place...you really that gullible? An escorts has his own place, but is going to make you pay for a room for a couple hours. How you figure? I don’t ask local clients to get a hotel for a couple of hours, even if they are the only one booked because 1 appointment still offsets it. When I can’t host from home, clients pay me deposit and I get an apartment sized hotel that doesn’t do hourly bookings, and probably for less price than it would cost for 4 hours in NYC. Because I’m a Diamond member with 3 hotel chains. Better check my background ☝? Keep your love, luv. It’s laced with hatred and I can taste it...

Just for the record everyone: I only reacted to being criticized by the poster in protest. A person can only take so much, before they pop back. The OP has relentlessly come for me, when I've never come for him...and i don't even know him. That doesn't mean I am fat shaming. It just means I'm tired of his shit, and he lost my politeness and filter. He thinks it's okay to put me down, shame me for sharing my experiences...but the moment I say something that could save his life one day, he throws a compete hissy. So predictable. Reminds me of the kids in grade school. If you want to give hard criticism about my life, take a look at the changes in your own, before trying to interpret mine.

Boy, BYE! Don't talk to me when you're too cheap to get a hotel and you can't spell. You 28 years old trying to find cheap places to meet escorts. At-least I have the confidence to show myself online. Where's your pictures? https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/cheap-places-to-be-with-provider.161778/ And no I don't judge anyone's weight, but if someone wants to be judgemental towards me...they are going to get judgmental handed back to them.

Thankyou 1,000 times over for your perspective! I had completely not noticed that my RentMasseur has a different weight than my Rentmen. Idk how that happened or how I hadn’t noticed that. I know lately, my phones have been behaving quirky to where when I press one part of the screen, I end up pressing something different. So that might of been something by when editing ads. I’ve also taken into consideration the other things you’ve mentioned. Some of the things you said, I’m not willing to change. Mainly the deposit part. I’ve gone back and forth between doing them, and not doing them, but at this point I feel it’s where it’s at for me now. I also can’t bring myself to write notes about clients. I know there’s ways to do it discretely, but I don’t wish to have a written journal or diary about clients. Even on phone. And I will say, I do remember a lot of things clients tell me. I’ve had clients say, “oh wow, you remembered THAT?” That’s just how I am. Atleast the things that matter. I really don’t feel the need to recall every tidbit about their life. At the end of the day, they’re hiring a sex worker and oftentimes may even be married. It’s a lot of thought process to maintain, for a situation that may likely only be a 1 or 2 time thing in most cases (that’s not being pessimistic, but like I said: if every guy had as many regulars as they needed, everybody wouldn’t be needing to advertise on RentMen every month). And like I say, there’s been lots of attempted 2nd bookings that didn’t happen, simply because the timing didn’t mesh. As for forum personality, I can’t help myself lol. I don’t like bitchy people who give bitchy replies. However, at the end of the day, obviously certain people are going to talk and feel how they feel. And I acknowledge the forum environment is toxic in some ways, and that’s why many providers don’t frequent this ecosystem. Even reading the thread about, “porn stars I would never hire” was toxic just reading it. It’s tragic that people actually sit around and circle jerk about not liking particular sex workers. But yet, don’t we DARE come up with a client review section for THEM. ??‍♂️ Yes, it’s a client forum, but if there’s so much hypocrisy and criticism going around, all it’s going to do is discourage new providers from joining. And that’s bad for the site because, we should all know that escorts DO PAY for advertising, and will pay for advertising. And even though this should be good free marketing, it’s too many toxic vile opinions going around...and I can imagine the average, well to do male sex worker would be turned off about the thought of trying to walk on eggshells not saying anything to offend a potential client or perhaps, another escort. That said, I still appreciate the input. I think it’s hard, much harder than I recognize even after 12 years in the game...because we don’t always know what may be wrong with us at any given time. Clients tend to often not speak their mind in person. I often find myself having to ask clients and apologize about certain things boldly, just to make sure they know...that I know, they may have been put off by something. Rentmen doesn’t help us write ads. We have to formulate our own style and writing, and convey our boundaries without turning off the genuine clients, while still keeping true to ourselves. That’s why I love having my business card, is very simple with hardly any words. Rentmen ad you feel compelled to say a lot, but you can just as easily say nothing at all. However, the online environment requires you to be inclusive, simply because people know nothing of you at first glance. At the end of the day, I know what I’m dealing with now is mostly due to needing a change in market. Like I said, sometimes it doesn’t matter what an escort does, if there’s no market to market to...one can only go so far. If you look across any Grindr, Adam4Adam or Rentmen, people write lots of stuff in ads that are off-putting, but they’re still getting laid. But atleast I know what things I can change, before I make that change.

You’re not obligated to peek behind the curtain. But if the realization that escorts aren’t “perfect”, and that we all have things we work thru or contend with is too “real” for you, you may be operating in a superficial, fantasy mentality. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying a fantasy. But when you refer to the person as a mere fantasy, you may be disappointed when the real comes out. Well I’m appreciative that judgmental, patronizing opinions (notice I said opinions, not assistance) doesn’t have much clout in the big scheme of things. And for the record, I don’t have a problem with people giving assistance. I can appreciate someone offering their tips where it counts, but when it denigrates into calling me the root of my problems, that offensive. And I won’t tolerate it. There’s some sad people on this forum who like to tear down someone’s self esteem and sense of worth, for whatever reason. It’s not helpful. There’s nothing helpful in saying someone is the reason why they are not being treated by others, in a way they want to be treated. Or that they themselves are why they can’t get more regulars. Without even understanding the whole picture. It’s not advice. It’s antagonizing. That, I won’t stand for and I will absolutely refute it as anything other than belittling criticism. And if a particular person doesn’t like my response, they can keep it moving. Thanks but no thanks.

You just can’t help yourself to keep up the condescending tone, can you? Those excuses, excuses, excuses, are likely you trying to project onto me, the EXCUSES you have with your body image and your “excuses” to not exercise. Because from what another member pointed out to me in private, you seem to be a bit overweight and have a body type that can’t fit into a harness correctly. ✋? How about you focus on losing weight and working on your body image problems while you can, instead of trying to come on here and figure out my problems and persistently go out of your way to insult me.

Well it sounds like you’re doing the right thing by booking in advance. And it sounds like you have some flexibility. If someone isn’t keeping their word on showing up for the appointment, that’s obviously being flaky. But the situations I discuss, many aren’t even giving that amount of notice. It’s more like “hey you free now”, and then when I say yes, I can be there at X time, then it’s no compromise. It won’t work if only 1 person requests a time, without trying to coordinate with the other. Obviously that has to also be prior to the session, not after...or moments prior either.

Well you can either keep wondering, or listen to what I’m saying to perhaps make a difference I can understand the reason for it, but I prefer to be more transparent. With so many celebrities and porn stars on Twitter speaking their minds (and sometimes getting backlash), I feel the adult thing to do is just be 100% real about how I feel. I’ve felt I’ve usually earned more business being genuine, than trying to hide behind an alias. If someone wouldn’t ever hire me for a post here, they’d likely never get booked in real life by me either ??‍♂️ Ive been working on my ad a bit recently, and still fine tuning what I want and don’t want in it. I have wondered if that seemed a bit redundant, and I may switch it up. However, I also like when a client says: I’ve read your ad...and points to it. It just lets me know they have an understanding of how I prefer to operate. Part of reason I’ve gotten so repetitive in ads over the months, is because I was too nice and polite. I didn’t say anything that alluded to boundaries, and I would get lots of texts about bookings, but lots of people who weren’t following anything I was saying in the ads.

Oh wow. Sounds like you dodged a bullet. I haven’t really followed the story, but I’m just half curious as to what comes of it.

I hear what you’re saying, but I think there needs to be some acknowledgement that, sometimes no matter what a escort does; it may not help. Sometimes the problem is: there’s no market to market to lol. I been in a relatively segregated, classist, conservative, relatively frugal mentality area of the U.S. for the past 2 years. It’s like a town that I believe has a condescending vibe towards sex workers, but see us ONLY because they “NEED” to. Hence why there’s not enough regulars. Some have gone out of their way to make things difficult. They’ll text about an appointment, and then not respond when I return their message. They’ll book last minute, even when I’ve suggested needing advance notice. There’s also not as much coming from my own demographic. So, if you are catching on that dynamics in cities can trickle right down into the sex work realm, you’re absolutely right. The problem is multifaceted, and I don’t expect someone who doesn’t know other’s situation, to understand. So I’m not mad at all. It’s much better not having to stay in one place too long and deal with the things I’ve contended with staying in one market. Especially if that market doesn’t support the local trade.