Charlie

When I was in high school, I came out to my best friend, and discovered that my classmate was gay, too. He also amazed me with the claim that he had been having sex with an older teenage neighbor of his. He wanted me to meet the neighbor, Philip, who by that time was 24. The neighbor was a very tall, slim but muscular Slavic blond with a handsome but rough-looking face. So one night the three of us went out in a car, parked in a dark area, and my friend said, "I want to see if you can suck his cock." Philip then pulled out his hard cock, and I was stunned: I don't know how long it was, but the head was huge! I tried, but by the time I got it all in my mouth, I could hardly take any of the shaft. My friend laughed at my inept performance, and then showed me how expert he was at handling that monster cock. And he had learned how to do it when he was! I have sucked a few cocks (ahem!) since then, but I have never actually measured any of them--I just eyeball them--but that was the only one that completely exceeded my limits. A few years later, after Philip married, when his wife was out of town, I accompanied my friend to Philip's home and watched him get fucked by that monster cock. I declined to experiment with it.

PS actually does have a large natural aquifer underneath the valley, but it needs to be artificially replenished regularly, and ironically one of the sources that is used is the Colorado River, which is a crucial water source for Las Vegas.

I had this choice to make twenty years ago, so I went to stay in and check out both cities. I found myself feeling much more at home and relaxed in PS than in LV. Ultimately, I voted for PS, because LV seemed like an island in the desert, whereas PS was closer to other options for places to go and things to do whenever I wanted to get out of the neighborhood. I was also influenced, as searchers usually are, by the people I happened to meet during my search: I found many more people who I thought could turn into regular friends in PS than I did in LV, and I have found it easy to make friends here. It is also nice to live in a place where one never has to explain that the companion with you is your same-sex spouse (everyone assumes that anyway). My partner, on the other hand, often asks me why we ended up here, because he finds the physical ambience too boringly suburban--he likes city centers, hi-rises and public mass transportation, and would have chosen San Francisco if we could have afforded the real estate. Of course, places change over 20 years, and so do people, but I think I would make the same choice if I were doing it again today.

Under "near travel," most guys name another town; he only names "Cherry Hill Mall," which sounds strange--does he expect to meet you at the mall and then arrange for the two of you to go someplace else? I can't think of anyplace at the Cherry Hill Mall where he could give a "soft core erotic" (?) massage (unless the CHM has changed a lot since the last time I shopped there).

No head?!

Yesterday I phoned a friend in London to wish him a happy birthday, but he wasn't home, so I left a voicemail on his home phone. Then I sat down at my computer to write him an email, but as I was about to hit SEND, my cell phone rang, and it was my friend, who had accessed his voice mail in London and was face-timing me from somewhere in rural France. We had a nice face-to-face chat. (Then, of course, we both had a problem trying to figure out how to end the face-time function.)

My only regular in this century was Rex Brant in NYC. When I hired him as my birthday gift for myself one time, he arrived with a bottle of wine, and another time he arranged for Gino Mancuso to join us for a threesome, at no extra cost. I never saw him again after I moved from the east to the west coast 20 years ago, and I don't know what became of him. He was a close friend of the legendary Reece Rothmeier, and I stopped seeing ads for both of them about the same time.

La Vierge is French for The Virgin. Not an encouraging sign.

I was born and raised in the US and have lived here for the majority of my life, but I also studied, lived and worked in other countries when I was younger. Naturally, when I retired, I gave some thought to retiring abroad. However, retiring to one of the countries I had lived in previously didn't make financial sense, because the living conditions were not any cheaper than one could find in the US. The places that might make financial sense were places where I didn't speak the language (a major consideration), and where I was not sure of what kind of medical care I could expect. Being a healthy 65 year old foreigner with plenty of money can be very exciting in a new country; being an elderly (e.g., over 75) foreigner with no family in a country where one isn't fluent in the language, doesn't know the way around local bureaucracies even after living there for several years, and may no longer have dependable health, is no fun at all. When my partner, who loved European travel, said he wanted us to retire to London (where he worked as a young man) so we could be close to places on the continent which we could visit frequently, I nixed the idea, and I'm glad I did. Now he is physically unable to travel at all, and we would have been stuck far from family and old friends, in a place where we were simply a couple of old queens who didn't even qualify for the social assistance we could expect in the US. I think I have mentioned here before the case of an English friend of mine, a sophisticated schoolmaster, who retired to a small town in Portugal, because he thought he could live there more comfortably on his limited retirement income than he could at home in England. After ten years there, he would phone me, practically sobbing, about how miserably isolated he felt there. I have no regrets about retiring to California, which is quite exotic enough for me.

And he played through an entire match with it!

Learning new languages also fascinated me when I was younger. I studied Spanish in high school, German in college, French in graduate school, Dutch when I was having a hot affair with a guy in Amsterdam, Italian because I was an opera lover, and Czech when I lived and worked in Czechoslovakia. The only one in which I could genuinely claim to have become bi-lingual was German, because I kept working at it for years by participating in German conversation groups and taking summer courses in Austria until I was in my 40s, but the problem in learning languages as an adult is that you have to use it or you lose it. The only one which I still use at all is Spanish, because I am surrounded by it living in southern California.

When I was a teenager, I was sexually attracted to men in their 30s and 40s; when I was that age, I was attracted to the same types; I am now 81, and I am still attracted to men in their 30s and 40s. I don't have an aversion to cute twinks or to wrinkled old men--I am just not sexually attracted to them.

That was fun!!!

There are lies that will have no effect on your activity with him (does it really matter whether he graduated from Yale?) and lies that can have a serious impact on you (does he tell you that he has no health issues when he knows he has a venereal disease?). Pay attention to the ones that matter, and take the others with a grain of salt.

Most providers of any age are delighted to get clients who are only in their late 30s.

David has lots of friends and admirers on this site, as a provider and as a person.

He looks about 12 years old.

From the Reader's Digest Large Print Edition (I don't subscribe to the magazine--honest! A neighbor gave it to me to give to my spouse🙄😞 When my friend's father filled out his personal information form at the pharmacy, he listed himself as 'bisexual.' "You're not bisexual!" his wife reminded him. He shrugged and said, "I thought bisexual meant that I believed in a two-person relationship."

The description strangeness may simply be a language problem. Although the first spoken language he lists is English, he has a Spanish name and describes himself as Arab (which means that French may actually be his primary Western language). "Free for overnight" may just mean there is no extra charge if you want him to stay the night.

Both.

Only one and a half filing cabinets. It covers every day of my life for the past 51 years. But there is also a separate list of every one of my hires, for quick reference. You never know when a journal will come in handy. Last week I received I letter from an insurance company about an "incident" they claimed had occurred on Mar. 8, 2023, which they said I was financially responsible for; I had no memory of what they said occurred, and by consulting my journal entry for that date, I was able to correct the company's records with accurate details that absolved me of financial responsibility.

Men, gay or straight, are usually sexually attracted by the appearance of youth--in males or females--and women are generally the same (e.g., wealthy older women with their "boytoys"). The traditional explanation was biological: men are designed to look to mate with females who can bear and raise their children, while women want a mate who appears to be potent. For gay men there are also psychological or sociological explanations given: men who are "tops" want younger men whom they can dominate socially or physically, men who are "bottoms" want to be dominated by younger men who are physically stronger than they are, etc. Of course, there are also some gay men, regardless of their age, who are looking for dominant older men ("daddies"). Most older men and women tend to look to their peers for friendship rather than for sex, so since a majority of the men who pay for sex are older, on a website geared toward that topic (CofM is not a dating site after all), the focus is usually on younger men.

I have already outlived all but one of my old gay friends from my youth and early manhood. I treasure my newer friends, but I still miss those who remember when I had a full head of hair and spontaneous hard-ons.

My mother was the oldest of six siblings, grew up in a household that also included three cousins who were like sisters to her, and outlived almost all of them. Those were some of the hardest losses for her to deal with.

In her extreme old age, my mother once said, "The worst thing about old age is not how you look or how you feel. The worst thing is losing all the old friends who could remember the life you once lived."