I’m saddened at times by my reliance on massages for intimate touch. Outside of the massage world, I often avoid approaching men to whom I’m attracted, and I often dodge men who express an interest in me. I fear the risk of rejection. I discovered strippers before masseurs, and with the former, I felt confident because my spending power ensured favorable results. I shifted to masseurs once strippers became unavailable, and I’ve struggled to find the consistently favorable results that I experienced with strippers. The masseurs I‘ve had good rapport with are not based in my area, and the traveling ones are hit-or-miss. I wish had more reliable options for intimate touch.