samhexum

DEAR ABBY: My brother lives in a different state, and every year he comes “home” for a week. I’m one of six siblings who live in the area, but “Jim” always stays with us. After the first time he stayed here he said, “I’ll just keep your key for next year.” I love my brother, but this means giving him my bedroom for a week or more. We have no other bedrooms, so I have to share with my husband and get no sleep. I’m in my 70s, and after a week with no sleep I feel awful. I have hinted to Jim about him staying with his son, but he says “no.” The other siblings don’t offer because he is so critical. Everything we do has to be his way. I really need to tell him he must stay elsewhere, but I can’t seem to find the right words. My siblings say just tell him. What should I do? — NEEDS MY SLEEP DEAR NEEDS SLEEP: Just tell him! Permit me to suggest a few phrases: “Jim, you will have to make other arrangements when you come to town because you can no longer stay with us. Going without sleep for a week while you use my bed is affecting my health, so please return our house key. We love you and would like to visit with you while you’re here, and we hope you understand.” Do not feel guilty for saying any of it because you have been more than generous to your brother. CHANGE THE @#!*ING LOCKS! Dear Abby: I have a friend I’ll call Rose who likes to brag about how cheap she is. Sometimes when we’re talking, she will interrupt me and ask, “How do you like my pants? I got them for a dollar at a yard sale.” Or she’ll say, “I got them for free.” Rose likes to draw attention to herself every time she wears something new by asking how I like it. Then she will tell me where she got it and how much it cost. I couldn’t be less interested, and I’m tired of hearing about her tacky, cheap clothes. We go to a water aerobics class together, and she will interrupt the class to ask how they like her “sexy” bathing suit. Abby, Rose is in her 70s and not sexy. I like her as a friend, but I am about ready to tell her to shut up! I don’t want to be mean. How can I get across that I don’t want to hear about her clothes? -- Tired of the Discount Fashion Show Dear Tired: If you say nothing, “Second Hand Rose” will continue her line of chatter. Try this: Say, “Rose, honey, you know how much I like you, but I wish you would stop talking about your wardrobe with me. You are interesting on so many other levels, and I’m just not into fashion.” Then cross your fingers and hope your friend gets the message. Next time she goes into her routine, play along, then when she tells you what the cost was tell her, "You overpaid," and walk away. P.S. You know that when she croaks, the headline will be "Friends shocked as miser leaves $30 million fortune to her cats", right? Dear Abby: I faked a secret admirer. It’s getting me a lot of attention, but I did it because I wanted to make my crush jealous. He thinks I’m faking, and I’m pretty sure he also thinks I’m needy and selfish. Now I don’t know what to do. Can you help? — Secretly Lying in Texas Dear Secretly Lying: I’ll try. When a technique doesn’t work, it’s time to change course. Quit talking about a secret admirer. If you are asked about him, just say, “It’s over” — which is less embarrassing than, “The jig is up.” Why your crush would call you selfish, I can’t guess. But if he asks you what happened, my advice is to say, “I like you better.” THAT’S the truth. Congratulate him for his excellent people-reading skills and tell him you hope he meets somebody more worthy of him than you some day.

I'd have to say the first BJ I was aware of was Thomas, and the second was probably ...And The Bear. What an odd topic!

When Pietro Boselli feels like having Asian, he doesn't order delivery. He picks it up himself.

When Pietro Boselli feels like having Asian, he doesn't order delivery. He picks it up himself.

the saga continues... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIKhNESg-Mg deluca & meredith got stuck in an elevator...

An Oxford president strong-armed octopus off a welcome dinner menu — arguing that the dish might be off-putting to disadvantaged students, according to a new report. Octopus was the starter meal at an introductory dinner for freshmen at Somerville College — one of Oxford University’s constituent campuses — last year, The Telegraph reported. But Baroness Jan Royall, the school’s president, sank the dish. “One of our students told me of her bemusement at being served an octopus terrine at the Freshers’ Dinner,” Royall, also a British Labour Co-operative Party politician, wrote in a letter published on the college’s website. “I’m sure the cephalopod dish was delicious, but it might not be quite right for everyone. I have asked our catering colleagues to ensure that the first dinner at the beginning of term features dishes everyone is comfortable with,” she continued, without offering any more specifics. In a statement posted to Twitter Friday, the school said it said it “[doesn’t] make any assumptions about what our students will or won’t eat based on their social or cultural background.” “The point of education is to widen horizons, including introducing students to new tastes,” the statement said. “But we want to make sure that, at the Freshers’ Dinner at least, food is served that everyone is likely to be comfortable with.” But some students were opposed to the change. “Whilst this move appears to be a demonstration of the college taking access seriously, it’s more tokenistic than a serious step to improve access into the college,” one told the Telegraph. “It also implies that octopus, and certain food dishes, are not for people from a particular background and should be reserved for the privileged few.” Another added, “serving eccentric meals at the first dinner may have been off-putting to many students from disadvantaged backgrounds, but there are more important things to focus on in terms of reform.” Somerville College was founded in 1879 as Oxford’s first women-only, non-denominational college. Now both women and men are admitted to the school.

The family of a developmentally disabled woman is suing a Pensacola adult care facility after the nonverbal, immobile woman was allegedly raped and impregnated early last year. The 23-year-old woman suffers from "profound mental retardation" and has several developmental and intellectual disabilities to the point where she can't move her hands or fingers and has to be fed through a tube, according to a civil lawsuit filed Tuesday in Escambia County. She was being cared for at Pensacola Cluster, a 24-bed intermediate care facility for children and adults with developmental disabilities. The lawsuit notes that due to the woman's multiple disabilities, she "was and is totally and completely dependent upon and at the mercy of National Mentor staff." National Mentor is the company that operates Florida Mentor which, in turn, operates Pensacola Cluster. A person who answered the phone at Pensacola Cluster on Wednesday afternoon said that the organization had no comment on the lawsuit. The lawsuit alleges that in January 2018, the woman was attending Westgate School on weekdays, a school for children and young adults with intellectual and physical disabilities. Westgate employees observed behavioral changes in the woman and noticed bruising on her hip when changing her diaper, according to the complaint. Westgate staff alerted the woman's caregivers at Pensacola Cluster several times throughout the month of January, but the caregivers declined to seek medical treatment for the woman, investigate the cause of the injuries or notify the Florida Adult Abuse Hotline, according to the complaint. According to a separate Agency for Health Care Administration report that was not part of the initial complaint, the Westgate staffers alerted the Department of Children and Families to the suspected abuse. In February, a doctor at the Pensacola Cluster facility ordered an X-ray of the woman's hip and determined it was broken, according to the lawsuit. The next day, she was transported to Baptist Hospital for hip surgery. During a routine pre-surgical pregnancy screening, doctors learned the woman was pregnant. The AHCA investigation noted she was between two to three weeks pregnant at that point. A sexual assault examination was performed the same day, and the exam "revealed significant bruising on her outer hip, left inner thigh, and left calf," as well as lacerations and bruising on her vagina and hymenal ring, the complaint stated. The woman later miscarried. The complaint alleges that "due to her developmental disabilities, Plaintiff is unable to knowingly and voluntarily give consent to sexual intercourse and she has been declared legally incompetent." Her lawyers are seeking damages for the medical costs associated with her assault and pregnancy, as well as for severe emotional distress, pain and suffering. The lawsuit does not specify a particular dollar amount that the family is seeking. Jim Green, an attorney with the Clark Partington law firm in Pensacola who is representing the victim's mother, said in a statement that the family is seeking justice for the woman. "(The victim's) mother is outraged and devastated by what happened to (her)," Green said in an email to the News Journal. "What she wants is to protect (her daughter) from abuse and for (her daughter) to be safe." Maj. Andrew Hobbs with the Escambia County Sheriff's Office confirmed law enforcement investigated the incident, but said no perpetrator had been identified and the case had been closed. "We exhausted all leads, we have no suspects, and the case will be placed inactive," he said. "However, if we get any more leads, the case can always be reopened." Hobbs said he couldn't comment further on the investigation, including on whether or not DNA samples had been obtained and been matched with people who might have come into contact with the victim. According to the AHCA report, officials investigated the incident and cited several "deficiencies" with the way Pensacola Cluster responded to the situation. The program manager at the facility was informed several times of the victim's bruising and behavioral changes prior to the discovery of the assault and broken hip, but said she didn't call the abuse hotline because she thought the wheelchair caused the bruises, the report states. The program manager also said she didn't believe the victim had been raped, the AHCA report said. When the sexual assault was discovered, the victim was immediately transferred to a different care facility. The local case comes on the heels of another case in Phoenix, Arizona, involving an incapacitated woman who was impregnated while in an adult care facility. The woman, who was left in a vegetative state after a near-drowning more than 10 years ago, became pregnant while she was a patient at Hacienda HealthCare in south Phoenix. She gave birth to a baby boy on Dec. 29. Arizona officials are investigating the case, and Hacienda HealthCare's CEO resigned last week in the wake of the reports.

Wendy Williams won’t be returning to her eponymous talk show anytime soon, as she’s now been hospitalized for complications stemming from her Graves’ Disease. “As Wendy Williams Hunter previously shared, shefractured her shoulder and has been on the mend. Over the past few days, Wendy has experienced complications regarding her Graves’ Disease that will require treatment. Wendy will be under the strict supervision of her physicians, and as part of her care, there will be significant time spent in the hospital,” a statement from the Hunter family read. “Despite her strong desire to return, she is taking a necessary, extended break from her show to focus on her personal and physical well-being. “Wendy thanks everyone in advance for their well-wishes and for respecting her and The Hunter Family’s privacy during this time.” Distributor and producer Debmar-Mercury said “The Wendy Williams Show” will air repeat episodes the week of Jan. 21 and will produce original episodes with a variety of hosts starting the week of Jan. 28. “For over ten years, Wendy has been a vital part of the Debmar-Mercury family,” the company said in a statement. “We wholeheartedly support Wendy in this decision to take the time she needs and we will welcome her back with open arms the moment she is ready.” Williams, 54, fractured her shoulder in December and then began to worry fans when she slurred her words on-air. She later apologized and blamed the painkillers she was taking. Since then, Williams has delayed her show’s return twice. It was originally supposed to return shortly after the New Year but was pushed back to Jan. 14. The showpushed the return date again to Jan. 21 in order to allow Williams to heal and come back “200%.” Because of Williams’ lengthy departure, fans have begun to question whether Williams is really treating her shoulder, especially given a report that exposed her husband’s alleged affair.

I've had Cantaloupe. Prefer Honeydew.

Brooklynites wondering what elk, ostrich and boar taste like are in luck. An organic burger restaurant that features exotic meat options is making its way to the border of Downtown Brooklyn and Fort Greene. Burger Village, a Long Island-based eatery that also has a spot on 7th Avenue, has signed a lease for one of the retail spots at luxury apartment complex 33 Bond Street. The restaurant will also be joined by Neighborhood Cut and Shave, a barber shop with three other New York City locations, the real estate developers announced. Both will have a 300 Livingston Street retail address. "We are thrilled to welcome Neighborhood Cut and Shave and Burger Village to 33 Bond Street, adding to the vibrant retail we have curated in partnership with Winick at the building...We are bringing great new amenities to Downtown Brooklyn for our residents and neighbors," said Steve Gonzalez, head of retail leasing with developers TF Cornerstone. The burger spot, set to open this summer, offers traditional beef burgers as well as everything from turkey to elk, wild boar and lamb. The menu also features options for vegan, vegetarian or gluten free diners, including black bean and mushroom patties and veggie patties. Their all-organic, antibiotic and hormone free menu also offers fries, salads, soups, shakes and desserts, according to the website. Both retailers will be added to the ground floor of 33 Bond Street, a 714-unit luxury residential building. "The retail at 300 Livingston Street offers an incredible opportunity for these incoming retailers," said Winick Realty Group Director Daniyel Cohen. "With access to public transportation, as well as the many development projects underway—including the nearby Ace Hotel and 9 Dekalb, anticipated to be Brooklyn's tallest building—their potential clientele grows almost weekly."

I'm surprised that nobody mentioned Bortus and Klyden Though things have not always been total bliss between them... https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/when-discontent-in-a-marriage-leads-to-an-addiction-to-guy-on-guy-porn.145305/#post-1669900

Have you lit candles and talked to it in a romantic tone of voice?

SCHMICO! https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/huge-tv-news-and-nobody-posted-about-it.142814/

Famously Huge Great White Shark, ‘Deep Blue,’ Feasts on Dead Sperm Whale in Hawaii Shark experts were thrilled to see the iconic shark in Hawaii this week. A decaying sperm whale carcass has been floating in Hawaiian waters since Thursday, drawing in schools of hungry tiger sharks. But compared to the scene’s newest visitors, they look positively puny. On Sunday, divers spotted a famously huge great white shark named “Deep Blue” feeding on the whale near Oahu. The rare sighting was reported by HawaiiNewsNowbased on footage shot by local divers. “If you asked me a few days ago what the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen in Hawaiian waters the answer probably would be pretty different,” freediver Kimberly Jeffries, who first saw the shark, wrote on Facebook. “If you asked me yesterday the answer would be freediving with Deep Blue, a great white, the largest ever documented, who was last seen in 2013 in Mexico,” Jeffries added. In a Facebook post, fellow diver Mark Mohler said at least three great whites were visible, and that Deep Blue could only be seen on Sunday. "Based on photos I can confirm there have been three distinct females recorded over the past few days," Jeffries told Motherboard in an email. Deep Blue became an icon several years ago during Shark Week on the Discovery Channel, though her remarkable size and age—roughly 20 feet long and 50 years old, according to many media reports—are up for debate. Her sensational reputation as the “biggest” shark on record can be attributed to (shot in 2013) in which Mauricio Hoyos Padilla, director of the shark nonprofit Pelagios-Kakunjá, and others filmed the large female near Mexico’s Guadalupe Island. In 2015, Padilla wrote on Facebook that she was “the biggest white shark ever seen in front of the cages in Guadalupe Island,” which somehow became“the largest great white shark ever caught on film.” Deep Blue is indeed very large, but shark researchers can’t say for sure that she’s the largest. “I lead the white shark research project at Guadalupe Island and first documented Deep Blue in 1999, 20 years ago,” Michael Domeier, president and executive director of the Marine Conservation Science Institute, told Motherboard in an email. “The claim that she is the largest white shark in the world is just a Discovery Channel gimmick,” Domeier added. “Deep Blue has never been measured, so how could anyone make that statement?” (He cited =68.ARB5g1pazUl6ynMpwGnZ6j_SapLFAuISiWq6e3dCYHTfBP2CpUq53KKkjDLs4fYPFSgrkHybfYOhTZB6Cyo6s1HbzhW75Q4OKPIZbg1fTz3PS4ETC2HpbrCaOPEhje9MGmFkhyERNEU62Cg9A6Yqhcp5XNRoFJqxlLpCjOvF6fnRvxFj5iQfLGkeUzzcqMeQDF02mt_-NUBV5dVhuNdvFveOjCfq_7tfJl-x2pgYtJQNWwDruUCcr52cMmD1ezkNJDfAnIpWx4xLDQBhI47GlCrGOfysyMut5xKXtiz63DHjkYdA_SNF1VFrKxsdcAY6I1Bn_uoxFSxWSLC_vOBy-l_KDA&__tn__=-R']another huge shark approaching Hawaii named “Murphy Jean,” described as “massively girthy/fat.”) As for Deep Blue’s age, Domeier said we can only estimate. “Deep Blue was an adult when we first encountered her 20 years ago,” Domeier said. “So she is likely at least 40 years old, possibly older. Unfortunately the only way to accurately age a white shark is to kill it and look at the rings on the vertebrae, but no mystery is worth solving at that price!” The shark’s measurements were similarly questioned by George Burgess, director emeritus at the Florida of Natural History’s Florida Program for Shark Research. “It’s a big girl,” Burgess told Motherboard over the phone. “Looks like maybe 18 feet. Hyperbole is part of Shark Week so you gotta be worried about some of the facts.” So is the shark in Hawaii really Deep Blue? Domeier and divers say yes. Mohler wrote on Facebook that the identity of Deep Blue was confirmed “with the white shark authority, SharkPix.com,” a repository of shark photos managed by hobbyist wildlife photographer George Probst who works with researchers to ID great whites. Great whites possess unique pigment patterns that are commonly used to identify them. “The line of demarcation between the white color on the underside and the grey color on the upper side is like a fingerprint,” he explained. “We particularly look at the pattern of demarcation near the gills, the pelvic fins and the caudal fin (tail).” Great whites are a rare sight in Hawaii, but they’re not unheard of; their presence iseven documented in Native Hawaiian ceremonial objects. Satellite tracking data suggests that most originate near California and Mexico, and that female sharks will roam the deep while pregnant before returning to the coast to give birth. Domeier theorized that Deep Blue may be one of these pregnant sharks. “She has likely been at sea since the late fall of 2017, [for the gestation period,]” he speculated. “She will give birth to 8 to 12 pups this spring, and then return to Guadalupe Island in the fall to mate and start the cycle over again.” Burgess agreed that she could be pregnant. Or perhaps Deep Blue’s belly is simply a food gut. Maybe she’s “fartin’ like mad,” he added. On Saturday, local and federal authorities towed the sperm whale 15 miles offshore after it drifted onto a reef. People have been asked to stay away from the carcass. Signs now warn beachgoers that “whale material” could be in the area. Both Domeier and Burgess discouraged thrillseekers from diving with the sharks. “Most of the time, that shark won’t turn around and bite you,” Burgess said. “But when it does, you’ll end up as a statistic on the International Shark Attack File, and the news headline won’t be ‘Stupid human dies chasing a 20 foot shark,’” Burgess added. “It will be ‘Shark kills human,’ and that activity is very bad for conservation efforts.”

When Freddie Mercury made his final on-camera appearance in the music video for “These Are the Days of Our Lives” in 1991, AIDS had left him gaunt and frail. The Queen frontman could barely walk because of open wounds on his foot, part of which would later be amputated. But as Austrian filmmaker Rudi Dolezal (I hope he doesn't have a sister named Rachel), who shot the video, recalls, he still insisted on doing his job. “The band’s manager, Jim Beach, said I had to cut down the number of takes,” Dolezal tells The Post from his home in Miami. “But Freddie didn’t want special treatment. If you watch ‘These Are the Days of Our Lives,’ he’s doing it standing up even though he was in great pain, because he didn’t want to hold anyone up, or be difficult. To me, the way he managed his illness in working situations like that, made him an even bigger superstar.” Mercury’s struggle with AIDS is left largely untouched by the Golden Globe-winning “Bohemian Rhapsody,” which charts the rise of Mercury and his Queen bandmates Roger Taylor (drums), John Deacon (bass) and Brian May (guitar). The biopic stands to earn more acclaim — especially for Rami Malek’s stirring lead performance — when the Oscar nominations are announced Tuesday. The movie ends with the band’s triumphant 1985 Live Aid performance at London’s Wembley Stadium, but for Dolezal that was when things truly got interesting. “They wanted to capitalize on the show, so they asked me to do the video for their single ‘One Vision’ in 1985,” says Dolezal, now 60. “That was the first time they hired me. I ended up doing around 30 videos for the band and their solo projects.” Dolezal first met the band when he was a young TV reporter in his native Vienna, during the mid-1970s. He diligently sent Queen his interview segments on the band, complete with his contact details, and became even closer with Mercury when the singer lived in Munich in the early ’80s. “Freddie was very happy in Munich because no one bothered him and, to be completely honest, he loved the gay scene there,” says Dolezal, whose 2000 BBC documentary, “Freddie Mercury: The Untold Story,” was nominated for a Grammy. Eventually, Mercury moved back to London and settled with hairdresser Jim Hutton. In public, Mercury was flamboyant and larger than life, but in private, Dolezal remembers something very different. “He was the greatest housewife you can imagine,” he says. “Freddie invited me to his private functions often, and, at one dinner party, the guests included Rod Stewart and Elton John. I remember there was a lot of bitching about other artists, and about themselves. I think Rod came up with the idea of forming a group called Nose, Teeth & Hair, because Rod had a big nose, Elton had problems with his hair and Freddie had his teeth!” On another occasion, Mercury’s hospitality went above and beyond the call of duty. “I was getting very friendly with one of Queen’s backing vocalists, and she and I decided to go somewhere — just the two of us. Freddie realized that and said ‘OK, you can use my guest bedroom,’ and went upstairs and put in new linen on the beds for us himself. As a host, he really took care of you.” The partying grew less frequent once Mercury was diagnosed in 1987. As depicted in “Bohemian Rhapsody,” he told only his closest allies, insisting it was never to be discussed further. (Dolezal found out only after one of Mercury’s former partners, German actress Barbara Valentin, let it slip.) Instead, Mercury plowed on with his work, and Queen released “The Miracle” in 1989 and “Innuendo” in 1991. It was during the making of the latter in Montreux, Switzerland, that Dolezal says Mercury decided to cease his primitive AIDS treatment. “The side effects were horrid,” says Dolezal. “The pills were so big you could hardly swallow [them], and you would be throwing up all the time.” In his final weeks, Mercury was confined to the bedroom of his London house in the tony Kensington neighborhood, and it was apparently Dolezal’s work that kept him in high spirits. “I was told by one his assistants that Freddie watched my videos for ‘I’m Going Slightly Mad’ and ‘These Are the Days of Our Lives’ all the time,” recalls the director, growing tearful. Even when ill, he says, Mercury was enthusiastic: “He would say, ‘Play it again, play it again.’ ” Mercury issued a statement confirming he had contracted AIDS and died just a day later on Nov. 24, 1991. He was 45. Dolezal is writing a book titled “My Friend, Freddie” about his experiences (due out later this year) and plans to release unedited versions of his interviews with Mercury in a new film, “Freddie Mercury: In His Own Words.” With so much of Mercury’s extraordinary life left uncovered, it opens the door to another “Bohemian Rhapsody” film, with Brian May telling Classic Rock magazine there “might” be a sequel. “I think it would be a brilliant idea,” says Dolezal, who earned critical acclaim for his 2017 documentary on Whitney Houston, “Can I Be Me,” co-directed by Nick Broomfield. “He had so many adventures, you could probably do four movies!”