Realalist

Just gave it a whirl and results came in pretty fast. I think I prefer the RM approach for now but will continue to experiment.

What? I have too many issues for that. Back to RM.

I'm taking notes and downloading the app as we speak.

Hilarious reporting of immorality given your interest in this board. Doesn’t strike you as a little inconsistent or ironic?

Why do they consistently need to change profile names? It's sketchy.

You really can't trust anyone. I was just going through his RM reviews earlier and was seriously considering him. Surprised all those people had good experiences.
 
Update: I was just browsing his profile hours ago and checked just now and a negative review is removed. Weird.

Unfortunately, I've found that multiple reviews on rentmen don't mean anything. Scammers often create their own accounts and give themselves multiple positive reviews.
 
Of the five reviews for AnthonyAdams, two of them are from the same person, Drichardson. Another reviewer, DaddyDeep reviewed the same exact models as Drichardson - too much of a coincidence. And most of the reviewers joined in February 2019. I look for reviewers who have been members for several years.
 
That's why I value this forum and rarely hire outside of those who have been determined as "real" by its members.
 
I've already asked for a thumbs up pic from both - and there's been no response. I'm gonna pass - I trust my nose - and this smells fishy.

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

Agreed. Everyone is different but I want to get right to it and out the door shortly after climax.

@Realalist bravo for sharing. I think the real flaw in your logic is assuming that providers like or are attracted to guys with bodies different from yours. I am certain providers see their share of guys who may be thinner or more muscled or younger or whatever and are still not attracted to them. At a very basic level most escorts are attracted to your money and have learned to work around whatever lack of attraction they have to whatever it is you are. As a bigger dude myself I can attest to the fact that loads of young and hot guys have been very into me and my body. Some of it is just the confidence in which I present myself. In terms of informing someone in advance, I highly recommend it. It shifts the conversation when you arrive to being in-the-moment and thinking of the pleasures to come instead of in your head worrying about what the provider thinks, after all- forewarned is fair warned.

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

Agreed. Everyone is different but I want to get right to it and out the door shortly after climax.

After he comes in I offer water or something to drink....Then I get close...touch his crotch gently and ask...what did you bring me?

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

"Too disgusting to hire an escort" never came out of my mouth (or anyone else's) but I suppose I appreciate the effort.

I think you somewhat missed the point. This conversation is about my anxiety hiring escorts while fat, so "trying to fit it" or "getting the hotties to notice you" is far from the issue I described. While I agree getting in shape would probably help with some of my issues, I'm certainly not doing it so an escort will like me.

In 100% of all my hires, after saying hello, hanging up my jacket, and answering whether I want a glass of water or not, we get right down to hot and sweaty business. That may seem transactional to some guys but I like it like that, and my hires seem to, too.

In my very first true hire of a guy from a web site about 6 years ago I picked a “porn star” figuring he would know what to do. He knew exactly what to do.
 
I sat on a sofa in his living room and he in an overstuffed chair about 10 feet away. It was to be a 2-hour meeting and he talked for over an hour and half. He talked non-stop about everything under the sun: his days as a flight attendant, real estate, politics, etc. With about 15 minutes left he stood up “well, out time is about up. Why don’t we get back together for some fun.”
I foolishly booked another 2-hours and the exact same thing happened. I didn’t know how “this stuff” was supposed to work and didn’t know what to do. (He is still on RentMen in Atlanta and still advertising as a porn star.)
 
I do like to chat and get acquainted with someone I’ve never met, including in my Seekingarrangement days, but learned to begin some physical contact immediately - a big hug and kiss. Then chatting with a light touch to the forearm... resting a hand on the shoulder.. “do you mind if I kiss you”, etc. I have found myself still yapping away after 30 minutes but that’s my fault. And then move to “shall we get more comfortable” pretty quickly. If I’m getting a vibe that’s anything but enthusiastic I suggest that we schedule for a time when he’s more comfortable.

No it isn't appropriate for two basic reasons: the OP didn't ask for advice about his weight and we have no knowledge about his genetic/environmental/medical issues. There are many reasons for someone to be overweight and a large number of them are not directly controllable. Without far more information, we have no idea and no valid basis to say something like was said above. We don't even know if he's medically obese! All he's said pertains to the extreme lookism he's experienced. The statements by gymowner and others are loaded with implicit assumptions based on illusions of "control" and "will" that are frankly condescending and elitist. Given what's been shared so far, those comments are counterproductive and potentially harmful.

I've not been with any of them but I certainly like the looks of https://rent.men/Alex_xx/
 
You have good taste though!

Rather than offer another comment on this aspect, I thought I'd post a link to this article from a few years ago. David is well known in the forum, many of us have been to pool parties at his home in Palm Springs.
https://www.out.com/lifestyle/2016/2/09/price-intimacy-time-i-hired-sex-worker

Start out by describing yourself in you initial message like you did in the OP " Hi there, saw your ad. I am a tall mid-30's overweight black man interested in seeing you soon. Would you be available (insert when you are looking to meet)."
The ones that would have a problem would simply probably not respond.
As general advice I tell people to be weary of those who can't discuss logistics in an intelligent manner. For example, if you ask if they are available today, a "yes, I will be available after 5pm" is way better than a simple "yes". For your concerns specifically you want to try and avoid those who will say yes to score the money, bit then show different colors once in person.
 
You never know until you try so dont be afraid to reach out to those that you are really interested in.
Your weight does not define you. It's only a small piece of a description, similar to your given name.
If you are healthy and happy with who you are, go out and get laid!
Just more of you to love!

@Realalist thank you for sharing so honestly. Your willingness to be so vulnerable is a good sign of underlying courage and strength. I urge you to use your money to work with a therapist to unpack these negative self-concepts and change the mental habits that reinforce them. This isn't about your physical weight or appearance. It's about how you see and think of yourself. You need help in seeing the real you, not the distorted vision in your mind.
 
I'm not going to say "get in the gym" because I do not know your life. Weight management is a very individualized issue because genetics, economics, psychology, some injuries, and more all affect our weight. The only person able to answer this is you in consultation with your doctor(s) to determine what's best for your health and quality of life.
 
To address your original question, I urge you to filter your escort search for escorts who say things like "all types welcome," "all sizes welcome," or "all body types welcome" and the like. I also urge you to describe yourself some-what when you contact the escort because you want them to self-select and be able to create the fantasy you want. To do that, they need to know a little about you. Escorts are paid professionals but they're still human beings. Bigotry is fundamentally human. Why would you want to waste time with a bigot who has an issue with your ethnicity, age, weight, or whatever? You do not need that kind of negativity in your life. You deserve much better and there are plenty of humans who would be happy to know you. Make it easier for you and them to find each other.

Be gentle with me because I'm sharing something that I can't share anywhere else that's rather personal for me.
 
I'm a tall mid-30's overweight black man that probably spends more time on RM than any other site. I often fantasize about having an amazing experience with a hot guy to at least somewhat makeup for the disaster that is a my dating life. The problem is that I experience a great deal of anxiety trying to hire someone because of my weight. I've had a number of bad experiences in the free dating world because of my weight and I always feel like that experience will be similar with an escort. Mostly I tend to choose less attractive escorts to mitigate some damage but I feel so ridiculous passing up hot guys I can afford because of this fear. I just want to feel wanted and validated. Does anyone else share these feelings?