Eric Hassan

i'lll be there! i'm arriving on thursday the 11th and will stay at inndulge until the 21st. i'm looking forward to seeing everyone!!!

if you're into VR, david sf has been working on virtual reality mediation apps - they're really good (i was helping him test them out last april when we were recovering from our motorcycle accident, so i might be biased) - you can see more about them at heal-vr.com

yeah, definitely shut the tv off. you're the main attraction! if i feel like an icebreaker is needed, i'll often ask an open-ended question - something that gets the other guy talking, especially if i think i can add to the conversation. the question can be about anything, as long as it requires a yes or no answer. also, it's always ok to tell your provider you're nervous or shy or not great at social conversation or whatever. i've met with guys who told me that ahead of time, and i'm glad they did, because their body language and relative silence would have made me feel like they weren't into me or the encounter. because i knew they were shy, i was able to do something about it, and not think i was the problem.

I get it. What I think is helpful to remember is that this whole escort business thing is difficult for a lot of us to conceptualize and understand in our heads. There's nothing quite like it and nothing similar enough so as to serve as an adequate comparison. Add to that the stigma that surrounds those of us on both sides of the deal and the lack of broad social support for even discussing this topic in healthy ways. Social isolation combined with shame and guilt versus experiences that for many of us are the most intimate, real, and vulnerable times we ever get to have can really fuck with ones mind. Now you get a bunch of us dealing with all of this stuff to some degree or another and put us together on the internet At least we are all still mostly speaking to each other lol

I really appreciate this response! For me, this is where my "without additional context" caveat comes up. There are tons of reasons that negotiating rates and arrangements makes incredibly good business sense. As some can attest, I'm one of those guys who is very happy to negotiate mutually beneficial arrangements. I also occasionally offer weekday specials and always offer student rates and a home state discount to NH folks. What I was referring to was the out-of-the-blue never-texted-me-before message that asks me if I'll "take 125" or "do half an hour for 50." Yes, those are real messages I got. It's exceedingly rare - those are the only 2 examples I have - but I read the issue to be focused on the question of opening up with negotiation. At the end of the day, there really isn't an answer that is right or wrong. What I've offered is only my experience and what works for me. Other guys might not be so sensitive about it. What I can say that will always go a long way - even if you end up annoying the guy or not getting a deal - is if you approach with respect. It might not go your way but you won't be sorry you were kind!

Without any additional context, I would interpert someone negotiating with me for a lower rate to be telling me they think I am worth less than I charge and I would find it disrespectful. I won't take that personally, but I certainly wouldn't think of someone doing this sort of thing as a savvy businessman.

It's not that I don't think about or factor in lost opportunities, it's more that I only have so many fucks to give, and I can't dwell on that shit. It sucks when someone cancels especially when I've told others I was unavailable. I can get really upset about it. I just have gotten to the point in my life where I can't focus on things I lost or that didn't happen or I didn't get. That mindset of lack would inform my interactions with others, and I would be not very fun because I'd be so focused on not getting burnt that I would not have space for being present and being a good provider.

it's time to start re-examining how we define "success." there's an interesting twat on twitter that i reposted about how the paradigms and status symbols and measurements that defined success 50 years ago are no longer relevant - how the younger generation is seeing the 40/40/40 method (working 40 hours a week for 40 years earning 40k a year) isn't bringing happiness, and with the volatility of the economy doing things like saving in a retirement account or counting on a pension are not the way to go.

I'm sorry the escort didn't respond gracefully. It can be frustrating when someone cancels an appointment, especially when the circumstances seem suspect, but it doesn't seem helpful to me to go off on someone about that aspect of this business. Personally, I suspect sometimes "I'm not feeling well" is code for I don't have the money to pay you, or I am not so horny anymore and don't want to connect, or I found someone else I'd rather hang with, or my husband/wife/partner isn't going to be gone like I thought they were, or maybe I am actually sick. I don't really care what the reason is because I like to mind my own business, and let others mind theirs - it's not my job to get to the bottom of things when someone cancels. That said, if you are legit sick (or feeling like you might not have the money, or not certain if you want to go through with it) communicate as soon as you can. If you're uncertain, say so. "I feel like I might be getting sick with a cold. I don't want to get you sick on our appointment tomorrow night, but I'm not certain what this is. I'll check in tomorrow to let you know if I can keep the appointment." This sort of "heads up" goes a long way. Also, I do not think it's necessary to pay for an appointment that you cancel unless the escort has or will incur costs. For example, if you were to see a show with the escort and he bought tickets, pay him for the cost of the tickets if you cancel.

I haven't read all the responses, so I might be repeating someone else, but here goes: If this is someone you are even remotely considering marrying, I would hope you would be able to have "difficult" conversations with him. I think it's helpful that you have us to come and bounce ideas off of, get some feedback, etc. but if you've got all these concerns and questions and worries, it's not us that can help you. Also, give the guy a break. Maybe he was in a bad mood or thinking about something else when you complimented him. Sometimes what one day might feel OK can feel not so OK the next. Lastly, this might just be lust. It might be new relationship energy. It might be true love. You can call it whatever you want, but do yourself the hugest favor you can and try to enjoy as much of it as you possibly can!

I usually experience a similar pattern of slow down towards the end of the calendar year, with small spikes right around Christmas and, often, January is a very full month. Like Kevin said, where we might be could differ - I've talked to guys when I've been randomly slow and they've been crazy busy, and vice versa. I've found the longer I keep at this, the easier those times feel - I know they aren't forever, and I'm less tempted to compare my experience with that of others. Like Victor, I plan my time to account for what I expect to happen - tailoring my travel schedule and recreational stuff based on when I expect to be busy or not.

I, too, note that folks seem to just fire off the generic request and think nothing of it. I get dozens of requests - folks all over the world, most of which never send me any message at all beyond that request. I typically just unlock because if it means that much for someone to see some pics of my dick, fine. If someone does send me a message making the request, I grant it but also point them to my twitter and my websites as I post there much more frequently. Personally, I would advise most folks looking around to read carefully - a lot of us link you to better pics, our sites, social media, etc - in the body of our ads Also, make google your friend - very often you'll find more and better pictures somewhere else as I don't think most of us keep our RM private gallery updated as often as we might other outlets.

For me, I look for a name - that gets the most attention from me. Then, either some sort of greeting or request about meeting. What you listed here is PERFECT (for me) for an intro text. Variations are welcome, of course, but I don't even bother to respond to messages that don't go beyond "hey" or "avail?" If you're not getting a response with what you've listed here, contact me instead. I'll respond

i don't make resolutions for the new year but i do set a theme for the year - something to guide me and inspire me. this year i turned 40 and celebrated many other major milestones, so my theme was joy and celebration. for 2019, my theme is "just do it" - i've found myself in a cycle of contemplation/planning/drafting with some projects i'm working on, and some of the rigidity i've established to get shit done has sucked some of the spontaneity out of my life - "just do it" is encouragement to enjoy the spirit of the moment and move past thinking to doing also, i know around this time of year a lot of folks consider resolutions related to fitness and diet. two things - first, you're fucking perfect no matter what your body looks like and second: if you're someone who is looking for guidance, advice, or insight into your health- or fitness-related resolutions, i'm happy to talk with you - i've got some expertise, tons of experience, and i'm tired of working out alone lol

if i don't have a boner at work, i worry.

i had a hunch by about 7 that santa wasn't real - especially when i noticed that all the gift tags had handwriting that looked exactly like my mother's very distinctive handwriting. she confirmed it for me either that year or the year adter in her typical brusque manner: she had purchased new snow boots for me - intending to give them for christmas - but wanted to make sure they fit, so she asked me to try them on and said "you know there's no santa, don't you?" my mother has never been one for rounding the corners or softening the blow.

If you're a regular that I would consider offering a "freebie" (or any discount), I'm very aware and don't need a punch card. Also, freebies come in all different forms

If you're a regular that I would consider offering a "freebie" (or any discount), I'm very aware and don't need a punch card. Also, freebies come in all different forms

I’m a generous and consistent tipper; I see my guy for a haircut and beard shape/trim every 2 weeks. He’s never raised my rates in 6+ years, always does an outstanding and speedy job, communicates early if he’s going on vacation, etc. He’s Muslim so I tend to tip extra around important holidays on the Islamic calendar, but when I do tip, I pay him twice the total amount I usually give him.

I’m a generous and consistent tipper; I see my guy for a haircut and beard shape/trim every 2 weeks. He’s never raised my rates in 6+ years, always does an outstanding and speedy job, communicates early if he’s going on vacation, etc. He’s Muslim so I tend to tip extra around important holidays on the Islamic calendar, but when I do tip, I pay him twice the total amount I usually give him.

I would estimate about 15% of the messages I receive are wastes of some variety. Typically, they are messages that just say "avail?" or "sup?" (which I don't acknowledge) or just a "hello" or "saw your ad" to which I respond something like "hello, this is eric - who is this?" and which gives a 50% chance they'll never respond. I am counting messages that don't result in appointments for whatever reason in the 85% of communication that I receive that's legit. What can be really interesting to track is how many conversations you have versus how many appointments - I find that to be a more interesting measure of the work I do. I tracked this for about 6 months a year ago or so and found I have about 10 conversations for every appointment that I have. That includes conversations with others that didn't result in an appointment and separate conversations with the same person over multiple days counted each day (so if we exchanged some texts yesterday and then again today, that I would count as 2 conversations when tracking this).

Life is killing us. But seriously - sugar is a huge problem. I firmly believe that most people don't eat enough during a regular day (though I'm sure @Rudynate does!) and have weight issues and digestive problems because of sugar. This is a result of the sugar lobby which convinced the American public that the problem was fat, not sugar, which resulted in the low-fat, diet bullshit craze that led to increased sugar and processing of food (because you've got to process foods to alter their typical fat content and because you've got to make sure people will still eat it without fat - which we love to do when it's got more sugar in place of the fat) which eventually led to so many fat asses. And diabetes. And hypertension. And heart failure. And hospitalizations and procedures and bills and doctors visits and skyrocketing insurance rates and political infighting and people going bankrupt and premature deaths or way-overdue deaths. For sugar. Part of changing reality about our health is changing the conversations about our food. Our bodies need fat but they don't need sugar provided you are eating a sufficient amount of quality carbohydrates (potatoes, rice, beans, vegetables, etc.) Getting a balance of whole foods with healthy fats, lean proteins, and whole-food carbs does wonders for your physical well-being, body composition, health indicators, and mental health. The sad part is a lot of people don't know what to eat or how to prepare foods that they like, or worse, they are unable to afford to buy healthful foods and/or live in a food desert, where they can't get healthful foods. What gives me some hope is that food manufacturers seem to be adapting to food trends like using whole grains, organic/sustainable, etc - what will need to shift the most is people's willingness to make choices that are more healthful and give themselves time to adapt to different foods and tastes and different ways of thinking about food. But, still, at the end of the day, we're all gonna die.

Thank you and amen.

Happy Birthday!!

yes you can only message to others who are using wickr. the burn time you set is how long it will appear on the other's persons device. you can change burn time per message and the other person can not change your burn time for them, but they can change their burn time for you, and the burn times don't need to be the same