maninsoma

I've never understood clients complaining about the level of hotel an escort is staying in. Who cares if it's a Motel 6 or a luxury hotel if you're only hiring someone for an hour? If it's the neighborhood one doesn't like, then it's on the client to know the area where he's hiring and to decline to book if the escort is in a part of town you don't want to go to or, in the alternative, provide a place to host. All that said, obviously we're going to be left with a "he said, he said" here. On the one hand, if a provider truly is only offering massage services then I don't understand advertising on Rent.men because that's just going to make potential clients believe more than massage is available. On the other hand, BrandinHawk's ad, when read carefully, doesn't indicate anything explicitly sexual (oral or anal) other than rimming so despite an indication that he offers a "boyfriend experience" it's up to the client to ask what's actually being offered. Only BrandinHawk and Jordoncrag know what was discussed in advance, so we don't know whether the OP confirmed what he wanted was available or whether he simply didn't ask.

I love the sleuthing, but I have a few genuine questions: 1. If you have a strong suspicion that someone is a scammer, why even bother to contact them unless you think your efforts will result in something good happening (e.g., they realize they are being monitored and they stop scamming). 2. If someone's a scammer who is willing to misrepresent where he is and that he is available for in person meetings, why believe anything else he says? For example, we don't know if he's actually the porn performer whose pictures were identified. Once confronted with that information, it makes sense that a scammer would simply lie that they are, in fact, that person versus admitting to having used someone else's photos in his ad. I hate to say it, but there really isn't a way for us clients to rid sites like Rent.men of scammers. Rent.men could be more proactive by putting in place some guardrails, but they aren't interested or are unwilling to do so. The best thing we can do as clients is to repeat the mantra of "no deposits unless you actually know someone." Earlier today I read here a post from someone warning of an alleged escort who scammed him out of "hundreds" of dollars in a deposit. I checked the poster's posting history and confirmed that it likely wasn't just a hit piece on the escort -- the poster has hired and commented on other providers. That goes to show that sometimes even experienced clients get conned by someone with bad intentions. The only person I've ever paid in advance was someone I hired multiple times over many years and I paid him in advance more than once for trips we were taking.

Findom = financial domination.

Interesting that he's willing to show his face on Rentmen (well, sort of, since he's wearing sunglasses) but in all of his porn scenes that I've seen he's wearing a mask. He's a sexy young man and looks like he'd be a top's dream based on his scenes.

I equate PNP with drug use like meth or G. I've never associated the term with marijuana or alcohol use. I also associate its inclusion in an ad as an indication that the provider partakes, not just that he's open to clients who do, unless his ad has text that clearly spells that out. A major reason for me to avoid providers who list PNP in their ads: People who use substances regularly are frequently less reliable in terms of keeping appointments.

Yes, I think experienced clients are generally smart enough to distinguish between a hit-and-run poster (whether he attempts to malign a particular escort or praise one effusively) and one who contributes measured content. Your scenario, while different in details, reminds me of another back-and-forth between an alleged client and escort that ultimately left the escort looking like the sane one. I won't go into all of the details, but the client's complaint was, ultimately, that he thought he was so hot that he should get full service for $50. He tried to hide the relevant details in his initial post, basically calling the escort in question a thief, but the escort's description of what transpired was far more cogent -- plus he shared receipts without divulging the client's identifying information, and it was clear that the client was simply trying to get more than he was willing to pay for. There have also been numerous occasions here where a new poster attempts to malign a newish escort, but it's pretty easy for anyone with half a brain to see through those. The solution to this is not to prevent actual clients from posting their honest experiences but rather for the escort being able to rise above negativity by ignoring it if it's a one time silly thing, relying on other positive posts to outnumber the negative one, and, especially, not presenting yourself in a manner that gives credence to the negativity. It sounds like you removed PNP from your ad which is wise unless you actually do use substances in connection with your work. Simply protesting that you don't use drugs while having PNP in your ad doesn't mean anything to anyone who has ever known anyone with a substance abuse problem because, until they are ready to admit their problem and seek help for it, they always present with denials of their drug use.

I'll wade into the "is it just a preference or is it racism" debate with an anecdote. I was visiting a friend of mine about 20 years ago who was telling me that he just doesn't find black men attractive. (We're both white.) I happened to have brought a fitness magazine with me that had an incredibly gorgeous black man on the cover. I showed him the magazine and asked, "Are you really telling me you wouldn't have sex with this guy if he asked?" My friend admitted that the guy was hot. I think the "racism" part is that he generally didn't even give black men a second look; he saw the skin color and immediately thought to himself, "Not for me." It's not like all black men look alike, nor do all men of Asian decent look alike. Someone saying they just don't find men of a certain race/ethnic background attractive indicates to me that they have a preconceived notion that each person in that category won't turn them on rather than having an open mind and then ultimately acknowledging that they find a larger percentage of whatever category it is less appealing. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I understand preferences but I don't understand absolutism.

Except when I was still a teenager, when about the only kind of guy that attracted me was the California, blond surfer type, I've always had fairly broad taste when it comes to what I find attractive. I'm generally less attracted to fair skinned guys like myself, and if I was able to make a list of everyone I've ever had sex with I'm guessing that Latin and Asian men would dominate the list.

Assuming the timeline is correct in the first post, the guy asked for his fee first. Only after he collected the money did he say he was underage and his father was outside. Clearly this was all part of his con game since there would be no benefit for him to give people reasons to send him away immediately with no money.

Well, you could have called his bluff by telling him that you don't believe his father is outside in a car waiting and that he's underage. Tell him that the texts would reveal that he's offering sex for money, so the police would arrest him as well as you. Then tell him that he'll be less nervous once he drops his pants and your dick is in his ass. Maybe that would have coaxed a refund out of him. I'm only half joking. Sorry for your misfortune.

I've had many disappointing experiences, but few that were so disappointing that I still remember them years later. Surely one of the worst: I hired a guy whose rate was high for a simple erotic massage, and his ad was so sexually suggestive that I (stupidly) assumed I would be getting more than an erotic massage. Instead I got a poor therapeutic massage from a guy who kept his tank top and shorts on who talked incessantly during the massage. There was nothing erotic about it. I don't know if this was all part of his con artist act, but as I was dressing he spoke to me as if I could have possibly been satisfied and would want to book him again. This occurred when I was inexperienced/naive enough to not speak up at all about the discrepancy between what his ad stated and what I experienced, so I just paid his fee and left.

I only ventured into the territory of needing to meet approval to enter a club once, and I think it was the Limelight in the early '80s. My friends (some of whom lived in New York City, others just visiting like me) suggested that it wasn't just whether someone was attractive (face, body) but the clothes/overall vibe. I stupidly spent way more money than I could afford on an outfit so I would be deemed cool enough to enter and then pay what was then a high cover charge (as far as I was concerned -- probably not high for people used to living in New York). I guess it's better than having spent the money on the outfit and not getting selected to enter. The other thing I remember about the selection process was that we played it cool, by which I mean we walked up and situated ourselves in a way to be noticed by the doorman but we didn't approach him or communicate in any other way that we wanted to gain entrance. According to my friends, displays of eagerness to get in were pathetic and a higher likelihood of being ignored. The doorman motioned for us to enter rather quickly, so I guess we did the whole thing right. My only other memory was that Boy George was there, not performing but just as a customer. This was between his fame with Culture Club and his modestly successful (in the US) solo career. I felt sorry for him because a lot of people approached him to confirm it was him, and once he would nod or whatever they'd walk away. Maybe he was giving off the vibe to them that he didn't welcome their company, but I just found it odd that people weren't just approaching him to dance but were obviously most interested in confirming their celebrity sighting.

California law regarding strip clubs makes them not a viable concern. This isn't a political argument; just a statement of fact. Either a club has to turn a blind eye to legal requirements and hope not to get fined and/or shut down, or they have to follow the rules which basically boil down to patrons and look but not touch anywhere that might be interpreted as sexual (breast, buttocks, genitals, anus).

Well, if a provider wants to have the equivalent of a dress code then he should just spell that out in his ad, e.g., you must be under 40 and have a BMI under 25. It shouldn't be "send me your photo and I'll tell you if you qualify." That would be like a restaurant telling patrons they must submit a photo of themselves dressed in the attire they plan to wear, and then the restaurant deciding whether it meets their standards which haven't been spelled out in advance. Restaurants that have dress codes typically spell them out quite clearly, e.g., men must wear coat and tie, and take the risk that a diner will have horrible taste and show up in a 1970s leisure suit.

I don't follow the men who make porn other than watching some of their scenes, so I had no idea until reading that linked article that Seth is alleged to have beaten up a prior boyfriend as well as the one who is now posting about his death.