Jaker27

Definitely it was Bigvalboy.

Definitely it was Bigvalboy.

Definitely it was Bigvalboy.

No wonder gay men fear getting older more then the rest of the population. I used to see older gay guys out in Weho at the clubs and feel so sad for them. They just looked so lonely and sad. So yeah, that became my biggest fear. Loss of identity and no longer being welcome in the community. Sex and sexuality is a big part of our identity and the community was built on that for better or worse. Bars, clubs, circuit parties, and many other gay stuff. Anyone who doesn't fit in will be excluded. Age is a big factor in that of course. Unless you're a celebrity or it's your house that they're using.  
I went out recently to Weho on Saturday night. In the past I remember getting so excited by the prospects of who I was going to meet and maybe hook up with.  Except this time all I could feel was that it's too late and I'm tired. Ha. Clearly I've aged out of that. 
As time goes by I've lost interest in all that juvenile stuff. Well, sometimes I'll go out to a bars once in a while. Friends and family are my community and identity now. It's still weird though since I spent such a big part of my life escaping family for the glitz and glammer. I don't even recognize the club kid that I once was. 
 
 

Definitely it was Bigvalboy.

Definitely it was Bigvalboy.

Is that the whole video?  If it is, other than a glimpse of his ear, I didn't see the flight attendant's face at all and would never know he was one without being told.  

He sounds like a real charmer.

I've been sicking dick since I was 17. Came out to my parents in 1981 when I was 20. My husband and I have been together for  26 years. Yet:
Not Connected at All

Not Connected at All

Don't make broad generalizations about 'all gay people' or you are just perpetuating the same problem but in reverse.
I came out at 20yo and didn't meet many bisexuals.  It took time and experience and meeting people to gain a greater appreciation for the full spectrum of humanity sexuality. 
We older gay and bisexual men may be frustrated with the alphabet soup of the modern sexual spectrum, but it is just a continuation to change society to accept that sexuality and gender go far beyond the binary definitions foisted on humankind by cis gender, straight white men.  Show some compassion and empathy.  The fact that you are here shows you are a thoughtful human.
Even this dialogue makes me question myself... Am I looking for a gay community or for a community of the like-minded?  I gave up Catholicism for lent one year and never went back.... A joke, but it did leave a void.  Maybe I should explore secular humanism instead of the LGBTQ community. 

What if I started a GenX Gay Meetup Grouo? Do you think folks would be interested? I think a lot of gay Gen Xers need connections and opportunities to meet up. It would be focused on culture, art, dinners, music, dancing and night outs. Instead of being alone at a gay bar a group of Gen X gays would be a presence. 

No wonder gay men fear getting older more then the rest of the population. I used to see older gay guys out in Weho at the clubs and feel so sad for them. They just looked so lonely and sad. So yeah, that became my biggest fear. Loss of identity and no longer being welcome in the community. Sex and sexuality is a big part of our identity and the community was built on that for better or worse. Bars, clubs, circuit parties, and many other gay stuff. Anyone who doesn't fit in will be excluded. Age is a big factor in that of course. Unless you're a celebrity or it's your house that they're using.  
I went out recently to Weho on Saturday night. In the past I remember getting so excited by the prospects of who I was going to meet and maybe hook up with.  Except this time all I could feel was that it's too late and I'm tired. Ha. Clearly I've aged out of that. 
As time goes by I've lost interest in all that juvenile stuff. Well, sometimes I'll go out to a bars once in a while. Friends and family are my community and identity now. It's still weird though since I spent such a big part of my life escaping family for the glitz and glammer. I don't even recognize the club kid that I once was. 
 
 

No wonder gay men fear getting older more then the rest of the population. I used to see older gay guys out in Weho at the clubs and feel so sad for them. They just looked so lonely and sad. So yeah, that became my biggest fear. Loss of identity and no longer being welcome in the community. Sex and sexuality is a big part of our identity and the community was built on that for better or worse. Bars, clubs, circuit parties, and many other gay stuff. Anyone who doesn't fit in will be excluded. Age is a big factor in that of course. Unless you're a celebrity or it's your house that they're using.  
I went out recently to Weho on Saturday night. In the past I remember getting so excited by the prospects of who I was going to meet and maybe hook up with.  Except this time all I could feel was that it's too late and I'm tired. Ha. Clearly I've aged out of that. 
As time goes by I've lost interest in all that juvenile stuff. Well, sometimes I'll go out to a bars once in a while. Friends and family are my community and identity now. It's still weird though since I spent such a big part of my life escaping family for the glitz and glammer. I don't even recognize the club kid that I once was. 
 
 

Not Connected at All  
Never have, never will.  

Somewhat Connected
The main connections I feel are
self-identification as gay a sense of affinity with others who self-identify as gay the experience of a decades-long fight for equal rights living through and surviving the AIDS crisis The "community" I knew as a young man I think no longer exists.  
Bars are much fewer in number and are not the center of gay culture as they were.
The "ghettos" are shadows of their former selves - both in terms of quantity (of ppl) and uniqueness of the culture
As society has become more accepting of gays (which is a good thing) we have also become more homogenous, more integrated with mainstream culture.  The energy and exclusivity (that "secret society") that used to exist in gay culture is diminished. 
So much has moved online....where we are largely namess and faceless (like here!).
Of course, age is a factor.....I no longer need the affirmation of being with gay people and immersed in gayness all day every day.
I lived in the ghettos, and spent lots of time in the bars and clubs.  I enjoyed every minute and would not change a thing. 

This is boring.