Pay half before?

[dixietony]

I'm looking to hire TheJohnSmithy for an overnight.

 

https://rent.men/TheJohnSmithy/

 

Since he is coming to my city, he is requesting half the money up front. He has good reviews, has been polite in our messages, and has a presence in IG and YouTube.

 

Just looking for opinions about whether this is something I should do. Thanks.

 

Edit: When I say upfront, I mean before we even meet. Like a day or two before.

[+ Avalon]

It is alot of time to invest and maybe he has had clients back out before so he is being cautious.

[Populist Fury]

I wouldn't pay anyone before the actual meeting. Never have, never will....

[MrMattBig]

Deposits are fairly normal for overnight appointments. If paying a little less up front would help put you at ease, consider bringing this up to him.

If you are apprehensive about half, try voicing that half is a lot to you to pay up front, and that you would be more comfortable with 30%.(This is just a suggestion of course.)

[dixietony]

Thanks for the replies. I've never paid beforehand either. He's someone I've followed for awhile.

 

But I'd feel like an idiot afterwards if he screws me. No pun intended.

[+ Keith30309]

I would be willing to pay a deposit for an overnight if it were someone who I knew and had a good reputation but, more fundamentally, it sounds as if this proposed overnight is with someone you've never met before. I'd have a good bit of difficulty committing to an overnight with someone I'd never met.

 

To play devil's advocate, consider that the escort is reserving x hours for you and that likely represents hours he'd be unable to fill on very short notice. As a first-time meeting as an overnight I would be concerned about some disillusionment after two or three hours and a client might decide to end that overnight abruptly AND expect to only pay a portion of his fee for those hours. He's then lost income on clients he'd potentially turned down.

 

What about a one hour meeting when he arrives in your city and, if that goes well, then pay him a deposit at the end of that initial meeting?

[mike carey]

I have had longer hires where I have been asked for (and paid) an advance fee, and also where I have not been asked. The advance payment was for an escort who was travelling and the no-fee typically where I was the one who was travelling. Some escorts don't seek to fill every waking hour with cliemts so they can be more relaxed about whether a particular appointment comes off. Others can't afford to have an idle moment. I don't judge them for that, it's just how their business model works.

[big-n-tall]

Deposits are fairly normal for overnight appointments. If paying a little less up front would help put you at ease, consider bringing this up to him.

If you are apprehensive about half, try voicing that half is a lot to you to pay up front, and that you would be more comfortable with 30%.(This is just a suggestion of course.)

 

I beg to differ about deposits for overnights being fairly normal. I have never paid a deposit for any overnight I've ever had, with new hires or rehires. I haven't paid a deposit for multiple days either. It may be becoming more common, but I don't think it's the norm yet. Only one guy (1st time hire) ever told me that he needed a deposit before we did an overnight. I decided to meet him for a shorter session to see if we were even compatible. We were, but we still have not done an overnight.

 

I understand why some guys ask for deposits upfront. However, I would have serious reservations paying up front partially or wholly someone I never met. At most I have paid for travel upfront, which has worked out mostly. I have been burned by this too though.

 

To the OP, I don't know how reliable John Smithy is. He does seem to be an upstanding guy. Ultimately paying whatever upfront is a risk only you can decide to make.

[KennF]

I think some of the reservations people are expressing have to do with the overall risk-reward. Since you don't know him, and haven't spent time with him, it is a large investment on a high unknown. The Risk-Reward is higher than most people are willing to accept.

 

Lower the ask (30%) or meeting for an hour first are just ways to lower the risk or ensure the reward is worth it.

 

I would guess, since you posted and were asking, that you aren't 100% comfortable with the idea of paying up front. So, either he needs to set your mind at ease, or you have already decided what you feel and are looking for support.

 

Whichever way you go... we support you.

[dixietony]

Update: I decided not to go ahead with it. Thanks for all the replies.