Newbie help for 1st hire

[Jose305]

I seriously need your help. Someone here recommended me an escort, I just contacted the escort. We texted each other. He was a total sweetheart, a genuinely good soul, definitely BF experience type. No time during conversation was anything sexual mentioned zippo nada. I was expecting to be asked what I was looking for, if I was top/bottom, etc but it never happened. It was like talking to a friend. Is this normal? Should I have made the sexual questions? I'm not looking for a BF experience. Should I move to someone else?

[+ MostlyLurking]

Don't ask what he'll do with you. Ask what kind of things he likes to do. And don't expect him to ask what you are looking for - only, again, what you like to do.

[Jose305]

Don't ask what he'll do with you. Ask what kind of things he likes to do. And don't expect him to ask what you are looking for - only, again, what you like to do.

Thanks

[+ José Soplanucas]

Yeah, I usually explain the things I like to do, and explain that it is important to me that my partner enjoys those things, and then ask him whether or not he thinks we can click.

[jawjateck]

I describe my sensual preferences and ask a prospective candidate to let me know if he is interested to explore a meeting. Some guys never respond again or avoid the issue. I never meet those guys. Some guys express enthusiastic interest. I do my best to meet them by proposing a session, duration and location, and ask him to quote me his rate. At this point, some guys don't/won't quote a fee. I never meet those guys. But a wonderful few, express excitement, enthusiasm, and answer my basic questions; we meet and tear up the sheets.

[gallahadesquire]

In other words: Don't let it sound like you're buying sex. You're borrowing his time, and tipping him for the pleasure of it.

[Jose305]

Yeah, I usually explain the things I like to do, and explain that it is important to me that my partner enjoys those things, and then ask him whether or not he thinks we can click.

It was odd this guy gave a totally different vibe, nothing sexual, it was almost as if he was looking for a friend. I think he will be perfect for those looking for BF experience.

[Jose305]

I think I might try someone else. If you guys are into cuddly hairy young bear looking guy with a super sweet demeanor, he sounds perfect for a dinner date, let me know. Interesting the guy who recommended him said he's great in bed ...twilight zone moment lol

[rvwnsd]

I describe my sensual preferences and ask a prospective candidate to let me know if he is interested to explore a meeting. Some guys never respond again or avoid the issue. I never meet those guys. Some guys express enthusiastic interest. I do my best to meet them by proposing a session, duration and location, and ask him to quote me his rate. At this point, some guys don't/won't quote a fee. I never meet those guys. But a wonderful few, express excitement, enthusiasm, and answer my basic questions; we meet and tear up the sheets.

 

What he said.

 

I think I might try someone else. If you guys are into cuddly hairy young bear looking guy with a super sweet demeanor, he sounds perfect for a dinner date, let me know. Interesting the guy who recommended him said he's great in bed ...twilight zone moment lol

 

But...

 

He might be wary about approaching the topic of bedroom activities with you or any other client. Hard to say. If you think a different escort would be more suitable for you (and based on what you have told is I think you are correct) then move on to the next guy.

[+ ArVaGuy]

I describe my sensual preferences and ask a prospective candidate to let me know if he is interested to explore a meeting. Some guys never respond again or avoid the issue. I never meet those guys. Some guys express enthusiastic interest. I do my best to meet them by proposing a session, duration and location, and ask him to quote me his rate. At this point, some guys don't/won't quote a fee. I never meet those guys. But a wonderful few, express excitement, enthusiasm, and answer my basic questions; we meet and tear up the sheets.

 

This is exactly how I communicate with my prospective hires as well. I also add a few details about my age and physical appearance.

[Jose305]

This is exactly how I communicate with my prospective hires as well. I also add a few details about my age and physical appearance.

Maybe this guy was also a newbie who knows but again nothing sensual, nothing even close suggestive...I felt like I was having a conversation with a friend...I'm going to be blunt we hire these guys for sexual fun...if I were an escort I'll know this and inquire what the client is looking for

[+ ArVaGuy]

Maybe this guy was also a newbie who knows but again nothing sensual, nothing even close suggestive...I felt like I was having a conversation with a friend...I'm going to be blunt we hire these guys for sexual fun...if I were an escort I'll know this and inquire what the client is looking for

 

In some jurisdictions law enforcement officers pose as clients and seek to lure escorts to sting operations. Their email exchanges could be cited as soliciting in a legal case. It's best for the escorts to take a more discreet tone in these instances with a first time inquiry.

[LivingnLA]

Maybe this guy was also a newbie who knows but again nothing sensual, nothing even close suggestive...I felt like I was having a conversation with a friend...I'm going to be blunt we hire these guys for sexual fun...if I were an escort I'll know this and inquire what the client is looking for

 

@Jose305, sex for money is illegal in most countries on Earth. In some places, cops pretend to be clients to try and arrest prostitutes. Add that homosexual sexual activity is dangerous because of violent homophobes or even illegal in some places, many people may be cautious texting with a stranger.

 

I don't always hire for "sexual fun" as you call it. Sometimes it's just for companionship, cuddling, etc. But, if you are looking for a sexually intimate encounter, you need to learn how to discuss your desires without spooking the stranger you're contacting.

 

If you have a rapport with him, why not try turning the topic to your favorite porn? Talk to him like a friend but describe your idealized porn scene where you fantasize about being fucked into the bed or you fucking someone or whatever you're looking for, set it up that way and then ask, is that hot? Can you imagine yourself in a porn scene like that? Or something like that. DO NOT MENTION MONEY. Don't say you're buying him or his time. If he responds positively to your favorite porn, ask about meeting. You should already know what his hourly rate is, but if you don't, ask to call to work out the scheduling details and over the phone ask for his hourly rate without any mention of sexual activity. This all holds true too for when you meet for the first time because y'all are still strangers to each other. Good luck.

[jawjateck]

I also add a few details about my age and physical appearance.

 

Yep me too. I have standard verbage that I have used so often to describe myself that my fingers just auto-type the info on an email, RM message, or text.

[Jose305]

Hey guys thanks for all the input!

[+ ArVaGuy]

Yep me too. I have standard verbage that I have used so often to describe myself that my fingers just auto-type the info on an email, RM message, or text.

 

Good heavens! We must be twins.

[Mount N Do]

I think I might try someone else. If you guys are into cuddly hairy young bear looking guy with a super sweet demeanor, he sounds perfect for a dinner date, let me know. Interesting the guy who recommended him said he's great in bed ...twilight zone moment lol

Well since I'm the guy who made the recommendation, let me weigh in here. And what the hell, since we're talking about him, may as well give him the proper plug

https://rentmen.com/italianboyph

I can't speak to the contents of your conversation obviously, but as others here have said, when contacting an escort I'm interested in, I typically compliment him first and tactfully relay what I'm looking for. I follow that up with a simple question along the lines of "are you down with that?" That your conversation consisted of friendly banter surprises me, as my experience with him via text is that he has very limited "conversation". Complete opposite of what he's like personally. I'm guessing that you set the tone and were probably steering the contents. Chances are he was responding to your questions. If you didn't broach the subject of sex, there was nothing for him to respond to. Personally, I've never left it up to my potential hire to lay the ground rules of my session. I think that's the responsibility of the client. Having said that, and for those who might be interested, this particular hire should have been characterized as one where intuition would have nixed it. Some of his pics really don't do him justice. He's a naturally defined, perfectly hairy, genuinely down to earth and a youthful yet mature playful guy. Almost shy but actually not shy at all. Not a clock watcher and actually enjoys small talk before and after. Granted, he may not be that busy so he has that luxury. It's still nice to feel completely relaxed after a session, at least for me. Did I mention that he's got perfectly natural chiseled "soccer" legs? Calves and all. I won't bore you with the details, suffice it to say that the obstacles confronted to meet this guy, would have under other circumstances, made me cancel and chalked it up to a learning experience. For me, there was an intangible that made me want to meet him. I even told him on my way to see him that first time that based on the shit we had to overcome, this session was gonna be epic or a monumental failure. It was epic... and one of those times I don't regret telling intuition to fuck off! So as the OP asserted, he would probably be a great date, cause he's so genuine and some may even find he's great in the bedroom. I did. It was instant chemistry for me.

[mike carey]

Good heavens! We must be twins.

Is this somehow news? I had just assumed you were since I first met you both.

[Jose305]

Well since I'm the guy who made the recommendation, let me weigh in here. And what the hell, since we're talking about him, may as well give him the proper plug

https://rentmen.com/italianboyph

I can't speak to the contents of your conversation obviously, but as others here have said, when contacting an escort I'm interested in, I typically compliment him first and tactfully relay what I'm looking for. I follow that up with a simple question along the lines of "are you down with that?" That your conversation consisted of friendly banter surprises me, as my experience with him via text is that he has very limited "conversation". Complete opposite of what he's like personally. I'm guessing that you set the tone and were probably steering the contents. Chances are he was responding to your questions. If you didn't broach the subject of sex, there was nothing for him to respond to. Personally, I've never left it up to my potential hire to lay the ground rules of my session. I think that's the responsibility of the client. Having said that, and for those who might be interested, this particular hire should have been characterized as one where intuition would have nixed it. Some of his pics really don't do him justice. He's a naturally defined, perfectly hairy, genuinely down to earth and a youthful yet mature playful guy. Almost shy but actually not shy at all. Not a clock watcher and actually enjoys small talk before and after. Granted, he may not be that busy so he has that luxury. It's still nice to feel completely relaxed after a session, at least for me. Did I mention that he's got perfectly natural chiseled "soccer" legs? Calves and all. I won't bore you with the details, suffice it to say that the obstacles confronted to meet this guy, would have under other circumstances, made me cancel and chalked it up to a learning experience. For me, there was an intangible that made me want to meet him. I even told him on my way to see him that first time that based on the shit we had to overcome, this session was gonna be epic or a monumental failure. It was epic... and one of those times I don't regret telling intuition to fuck off! So as the OP asserted, he would probably be a great date, cause he's so genuine and some may even find he's great in the bedroom. I did. It was instant chemistry for me.

Dude I hope like I didn't sound like I was throwing you under bus...omg you're so helpful to me...I apologize if I was a douchebag ...as you can see my inexperience showing...but I do stand that that guy makes an amazing dinner date as well as someone wanting the BF experience- he's genuine, warm, sweetheart - a human teddy bear

[LADoug1]

What did his profile say? We're there any Daddy reviews? This can answer some of your questions without having to ask. I only hire guys that have been reviewed or discussed on the forum. When I've deviated from this I've been disappointed. In my text to a potential hire I just say I'm interested and ask when it's convenient for them to meet. Sometimes I send a nonxxx pic. After they respond I thank them and then confirm rate. Maybe I shouldn't discuss rates but I sometimes want to know about discounts for multiple hours. If they refuse to discuss rates I understand their concern about LE but I move on.

 

I agree that you can say what you like to do and ask if he finds that interesting or hot. The idea of discussing porn preferences is a great idea as well.

[+ SundayZip]

Hey @Jose305... From my experience, it's not unusual for an escort to limit predate conversation to friendly, non-sexual banter, especially if his ad clearly describes his sexual proclivities and boundaries. It's up to me to turn the conversation to my sexual likes and dislikes and if I don't, he's perfectly justified in believing that my likes/dislikes are compatible with his. So don't write this guy off because he didn't bring up sex. Looks to me like he's a good one.

[Mount N Do]

Dude I hope like I didn't sound like I was throwing you under bus...omg you're so helpful to me...I apologize if I was a douchebag ...as you can see my inexperience showing...but I do stand that that guy makes an amazing dinner date as well as someone wanting the BF experience- he's genuine, warm, sweetheart - a human teddy bear

Lol, not at all my man. If that's what you came away with, it's all good with me. I'm not the kids agent, I'm a customer. You asked me who I would recommend locally, I provided the link to his ad and shared my personal experience. You contacted him because obviously he appealed to you and he apparently is not what you were looking for in an escort. Nothing wrong with that.

[MiamiLooker]

...but I do stand that that guy makes an amazing dinner date as well as someone wanting the BF experience- he's genuine, warm, sweetheart - a human teddy bear

So, does this mean you hired him???

[Jose305]

So, does this mean you hired him???

No I didn't but please contact him if you're interested! ..actually another escort emailed me last night, we hit it off on few levels he's not free this weekend but we plan to meet the next weekend

[MiamiLooker]

No I didn't but please contact him if you're interested! ..actually another escort emailed me last night, we hit it off on few levels he's not free this weekend but we plan to meet the next weekend

Thanks, but I'm not interested in contacting him. I don't understand your statement "that guy makes an amazing dinner date as well as someone wanting the BF experience- he's genuine, warm, sweetheart - a human teddy bear". How do you come to this conclusion if you haven't hired him? From only a telephone conversation?