Do we have to fuck? Inspired by Gar1eth

[liubit]

Sorry to hear that, @glennnn. I admit that when I first tried it, bottoming didn't provide me any pleasure, but I persevered and it worked! Practice, practice, practice. It can be a blast, believe me!

 

Nowadays, I don't do it much because my boyfriend prefers that I top him. C'est la vie!

[+ glennnn]

Sorry to hear that, @glennnn. I admit that when I first tried it, bottoming didn't provide me any pleasure, but I persevered and it worked! Practice, practice, practice. It can be a blast, believe me!

 

Nowadays, I don't do it much because my boyfriend prefers that I top him. C'est la vie!

 

How many times did it take? 10? 20?

[liubit]

How many times did it take? 10? 20?

Oh, no, less than that. I lose count, but I think I started enjoying it after 4-5 times. Talented tops did the trick. I especially remember @Anton, a very sexy Dutch (now retired), who showed me the way to paradise. He definitely knew how to work an ass with his big, fat dick. The rest is history. Oh, the memories!

[+ glennnn]

Sweet, sweet, sweet inspiration!

 

Do you feel pleasure if you use a dildo on yourself? I'm beginning to think my enlarged prostate just isn't up (or down) for the task. I tried to ask a urologist and got snubbed. Who else can tell me if pleasure from a cock up the ass and BPH are mutually exclusive? I can live with just oral pleasure if that's what it is. I've had some great tips and tops, but it just isn't happening. Maybe fucking isnt for me.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Sweet, sweet, sweet inspiration!

 

Do you feel pleasure if you use a dildo on yourself? I'm beginning to think my enlarged prostate just isn't up (or down) for the task. I tried to ask a urologist and got snubbed. Who else can tell me if pleasure from a cock up the ass and BPH are mutually exclusive? I can live with just oral pleasure if that's what it is. I've had some great tips and tops, but it just isn't happening. Maybe fucking shit for me.

 

Did you try poppers?

[liubit]

I don't know what to say, @glennnn, since I have no prostate problem. I just had my annual exam, and everything looks good. Maybe you are right, and bottoming is simply not for you. I am actually plenty satisfied myself with oral contacts: kissing, sucking, rimming are absolutely essential activities, fucking is not.

 

Yes, I used a dildo when I first decided to venture into the bottoming world. It helps relax your ass and makes you get used to the sensation of an object up there.

 

Good luck!

[marylander1940]

I can certainly have a good time making out with a guy. The best date I ever had we made out for about an hour and a half.

 

And lord knows junior isn't always cooperative. But all that being said as well as assuming the good lord is willing and the creek don't rise, I prefer to top. But I'm cognizant that others don't.

 

As Catullus once said," Vivamus atque Amemus!!"

 

Gman

 

I'm glad you go my email about this thread inspired by you and you decided to contribute.

[+ Gar1eth]

I've bottomed five times now, because I love the idea of being fucked. Unfortunately, although the pain level has gone down, the pleasure I hoped for hasn't happened. I keep hoping but I'm about ready to give up. How long before I start to enjoy it? Seriously! All of my tops have been well-reviewed experts, but it still hurts and the prostate pleasure is mostly missing.

 

I certainly am not an expert on bottoming (because I don't do it ), but I'm wondering if it is the pain portion keeping you from enjoying it.

 

A question to the bottoms out there to a practice that might take pain out of the equation-do you feel pleasure when you finger yourself and self-stimulate your prostate? @glennnn if most bottoms do-and you don't, then maybe you won't receive any direct pleasure from bottoming. If it doesn't hurt though, there is always enjoying your partner's enjoyment of topping you.

 

Another thought-in case the pain is preventing things-I used to meet with an escort who seemed to like bottoming for me. But he used a topical anesthetic on his hole before I inserted. I think it was 1 or 2 % lidocaine. That was prescription. But there's a product called Mandelay (and others) which has benzocaine in it which is used to try to delay cuming. There are even condoms sold with benzocaine inside them. You could try this in your bottom if you have no medical problems where this stuff would be dangerous.

 

Especially because they do NOT have facial hair, @WolfRamNHard. And they are generally smooth (great), with hairy legs (a plus).

 

How weird-while totally hairless legs would freak me out-a forest down there doesn't do anything for me. I'd much rather have facial and body hair. A cute face is important. But I don't want anyone who looks too androgynous or like a child.

 

Gman

[+ glennnn]

@Gar1eth you may have hit on something. I really don't get much pleasure from my prostate with toys, fingers or cocks, so there is nothing to balance the pain. It's not the minor and passing pain of penetration. It's more a deep pain AND lack of pleasure that persists throughout. I think it's time to make greater use of my mouth, which is so enjoyable and let go of the "I'm gay. I must be fucked" fairy tale.....oops! Seriously, @marylander1940 and you @Gar1eth , this is huge for me. I thought every gay had to be a bottom or a top. Think I'll focus on sucking, rimming, kissing, jacking and frottage. That should keep me busy. Thank you so much.

[+ glennnn]

What a great thread!!!!!!

[BasketBaller]

I don't know if it's anatomical or psychological, or both, but I must just be a natural bottom. I'd fingered myself before going all the way, so had some idea what it would feel like, but only some. I think the escort was charmed that I was asking him to deflower me, and was very sensitive. There was pain on penetration, and as he slid in, I almost called it off. But then he hit bottom and held there, kissing me and caressing me. The feeling of him in me, the sensation of fullness, was so unfamiliar, so unexpected, and a mix of pleasure and distress. He waited for me to signal him to start, and when I did, he began to fuck gently, then more strongly. Frankly, as soon as he started to stroke in and out, I was gone. I loved it and knew I'd want more.

 

There's always some discomfort on insertion, but once a guy gets in I'm good. I never used poppers or a dildo, nothing's been up my butt but fingers and dicks.

[+ Gar1eth]

I don't know if it's anatomical or psychological, or both, but I must just be a natural bottom. I'd fingered myself before going all the way, so had some idea what it would feel like, but only some. I think the escort was charmed that I was asking him to deflower me, and was very sensitive. There was pain on penetration, and as he slid in, I almost called it off. But then he hit bottom and held there, kissing me and caressing me. The feeling of him in me, the sensation of fullness, was so unfamiliar, so unexpected, and a mix of pleasure and distress. He waited for me to signal him to start, and when I did, he began to fuck gently, then more strongly. Frankly, as soon as he started to stroke in and out, I was gone. I loved it and knew I'd want more.

 

There's always some discomfort on insertion, but once a guy gets in I'm good. I never used poppers or a dildo, nothing's been up my butt but fingers and dicks.

 

I'm a natural top then-maybe. When I read about bottoming in college, the thought was completely off-putting. To tell you the truth topping (either males or females) and Fr. Kissing seemed on the gross side too. But bottoming, you might say, topped that list.

 

Then years later when I developed chronic prostatitis, chronic pelvic pain syndrome, or whatever it was/is, I found out that I wasn't fond of medical prostate manipulation at all. This was a strong disincentive for wanting to experience a tallywacker ramming my prostate. Even now I'm usually sore (and not in a good way) for a few days after a medical exam. When my condition was more acute, the pain could last for a week.

 

Gman

[BasketBaller]

Yeah, it's odd. When I was avoiding my attraction to men the idea of bottoming would have made me sick. When I had to admit to myself that guys turned me on, I still never really considered what it would be like to get fucked. But when I watched porn I found myself more and more intrigued by it, so much so that I hired someone so I could try it, just as a one-time experiment, you know. But like I said, once he started thrusting, I was a goner. My progression from deeply closeted, self-defined straight man, to bi-curious married guy took years. The journey from young widower with kids to escort client took a few more. The switch from curious/experimenter to total bottom was virtually instantaneous. Afterwards I struggled some with what it "meant," but couldn't deny that I'd never felt anything so good.

 

There is more to it than the physical sensation, of course. While I don't think of it as submission per se, there is something very appealing about "giving it up" to another man that I can't quite explain. The fact that I'm in a man's arms and he is working hard to give me pleasure, maybe?

[+ FreshFluff]

That sounds like a very heteronormative perspective since in much of the American heterosexual world, everything is foreplay and the only real sex is vaginal or sometimes anal penetration.

 

[TruthBTold]

Really the pleasure of a get together starts with the really extended foreplay. Kissing and sucking for each of us can go on and pleasure is gotten from each. We can both cum after extended foreplay. However, I really love to rim and if that happens it goes on for a while, followed by me fucking my companion. Me and my cock really enjoy the feeling of that. Then comes the section I am always worried about. I try to relax and let my guy enter me and do his thing. I really don't believe that my prostate has ever been stimulated in the way that true bottoms describe. But that is OK. There is something I love in both the top controlling me and stimulating the skin of my hole. I also love being able to be a power bottom (or try to be) so that the top is really pleased. Perhaps because my prostate is not stimulated I seldom cum by bottoming. I just love that the top can cum that way and then I cum with him perhaps stimulating my prostate with fingers and me masturbating. But as I mention above, fucking is not necessarily required but is really nice if it happens. Just give yourself the freedom to go either way and don't be disappointed if one thing happens rather than the other.

[liubit]

How weird-while totally hairless legs would freak me out-a forest down there doesn't do anything for me. I'd much rather have facial and body hair. A cute face is important. But I don't want anyone who looks too androgynous or like a child.

I am absolutely not into androgynous or child-looking men. At all. But I HATE facial hair and I prefer smooth torsos, butts and asses. Natural pubes and pits are fine. However, for some strange reason, the combination of a smooth upper body and hairy legs turns me on big time, big time. Go figure. Different strokes....

[MikeyGMin]

There is more to it than the physical sensation, of course. While I don't think of it as submission per se, there is something very appealing about "giving it up" to another man that I can't quite explain

 

When I was 17, a very wise and experienced older man (19) told me that if I was ever going to relax and enjoy bottoming that I first had to like the idea of it. Out of the mouth of babes...

[+ Gar1eth]

 

There is more to it than the physical sensation, of course. While I don't think of it as submission per se, there is something very appealing about "giving it up" to another man that I can't quite explain. The fact that I'm in a man's arms and he is working hard to give me pleasure, maybe?

 

While I don't mind if someone I'm with has a stronger personality or is a bit more, not really dominant but rather, directive, I'm definitely not into 'giving it up'.

 

 

Gman

[+ José Soplanucas]

I don't know if it's anatomical or psychological, or both, but I must just be a natural bottom. I'd fingered myself before going all the way, so had some idea what it would feel like, but only some. I think the escort was charmed that I was asking him to deflower me, and was very sensitive. There was pain on penetration, and as he slid in, I almost called it off. But then he hit bottom and held there, kissing me and caressing me. The feeling of him in me, the sensation of fullness, was so unfamiliar, so unexpected, and a mix of pleasure and distress. He waited for me to signal him to start, and when I did, he began to fuck gently, then more strongly. Frankly, as soon as he started to stroke in and out, I was gone. I loved it and knew I'd want more.

 

There's always some discomfort on insertion, but once a guy gets in I'm good. I never used poppers or a dildo, nothing's been up my butt but fingers and dicks.

I'm reading your posts in this thread, imagining you are the guy in the avatar, and growing a boner.

[marylander1940]

Yeah, it's odd. When I was avoiding my attraction to men the idea of bottoming would have made me sick. When I had to admit to myself that guys turned me on, I still never really considered what it would be like to get fucked. But when I watched porn I found myself more and more intrigued by it, so much so that I hired someone so I could try it, just as a one-time experiment, you know. But like I said, once he started thrusting, I was a goner. My progression from deeply closeted, self-defined straight man, to bi-curious married guy took years. The journey from young widower with kids to escort client took a few more. The switch from curious/experimenter to total bottom was virtually instantaneous. Afterwards I struggled some with what it "meant," but couldn't deny that I'd never felt anything so good.

 

There is more to it than the physical sensation, of course. While I don't think of it as submission per se, there is something very appealing about "giving it up" to another man that I can't quite explain. The fact that I'm in a man's arms and he is working hard to give me pleasure, maybe?

 

Thank God we have a prostate!

 

http://i.makeagif.com/media/4-17-2014/hpwAJC.gif

 

[BasketBaller]

I'm reading your posts in this thread, imagining you are the guy in the avatar, and growing a boner.

 

Oh, man, I'm sorry. I do play ball when I get the chance, and used to coach, but I'm not the guy in the picture. I wish!

[BasketBaller]

This thread has sparked a lot of memories. Including the strange fact that for all my early hires, I also had to hire a babysitter for my kids!

[+ José Soplanucas]

Oh, man, I'm sorry. I do play ball when I get the chance, and used to coach, but I'm not the guy in the picture. I wish!

Lol. I knew that.

 

Now, about your next post, yes indeed this thread is bringing old memories, 30 years old in my case.

 

Back then I was a queer activist in Buenos Aires, a member of a radicalized Trotskyist/anarchist (yeah, I know it is ideologically incompatible) gay liberation group, the GAG (Grupo de Acción Gay). A little bit because of my own personal quest and experimentation, but a big deal because of ideological consequence, I was forcing myself to bottom. I did not enjoy it not once.

 

However I do have a kink memory where I can associate bottoming with pleasure. This guy fucked me and after cumming inside me (this is right before the beginning of the safe sex epidemic) stayed inside me relaxing. I had not enjoyed the drilling at all, as usual, but the feeling of his dick softening in my ass was nice. Suddenly, this nice feeling became really pleasurable when it turned into a wet warm sensation filling me. This sensation lasted just a few seconds until I realized what happened. The boy was pissing inside of me. I reacted disgusted and offended, silly me, my conventional background was still powerful back then.

 

I wish I could go back on time to just relax and get lost in that warm feeling.

[WolfRamNHard]

Lol. I knew that.

 

Now, about your next post, yes indeed this thread is bringing old memories, 30 years old in my case.

 

Back then I was a queer activist in Buenos Aires, a member of a radicalized Trotskyist/anarchist (yeah, I know it is ideologically incompatible) gay liberation group, the GAG (Grupo de Acción Gay). A little bit because of my own personal quest and experimentation, but a big deal because of ideological consequence, I was forcing myself to bottom. I did not enjoy it not once.

 

However I do have a kink memory where I can associate bottoming with pleasure. This guy fucked me and after cumming inside me (this is right before the beginning of the safe sex epidemic) stayed inside me relaxing. I had not enjoyed the drilling at all, as usual, but the feeling of his dick softening in my ass was nice. Suddenly, this nice feeling became really pleasurable when it turned into a wet warm sensation filling me. This sensation lasted just a few seconds until I realized what happened. The boy was pissing inside of me. I reacted disgusted and offended, silly me, my conventional background was still powerful back then.

 

I wish I could go back on time to just relax and get lost in that warm feeling.

 

Wow!

 

BTW, my political background matches yours in some ways.

[+ Robster]

I thought we settled this back in 1986.

 

 

Damn, you beat me to it! By the way, this cover is amazing. Actually surpasses the original, in my opinion.