Open relationship experiences?

[WolfRamNHard]

Again on the topic of open dating and NRE --

 

In the gay community it is not that hard for men in open relationships to find sex. However, it is much more challenging to find other men to date when you're in an open relationship. And by dating I mean -- moonlight walk on the beach, holding hands under the table at a diner, making out in the car at a drive-in theater*, etc.

 

If you're already in a relationship, single guys may be willing to sleep with you but often they're still on the lookout for their Mr. Right in shining armor, and you don't make the cut since you're already taken, so they are not going to waste their time dating you. Married/partnered guys are also much more likely to be interested in sexual satisfaction with no strings attached, and not so much into seeking out the emotional excitement that comes with dating.

 

In other words, the dating pool for a gay man in an open relationship is very limited, assuming he's honest and upfront with potential partners about his being in a relationship. Since the potential for dating is so limited to begin with, the risk of something like this terminating an existing relationship is also mostly theoretical, unless the relationship is already doomed to failure for other reasons.

 

To the OP -- as your partner explores this side of himself, you are the "sure thing", his anchor if you will. The other dates are going to be far and few between with limited likelihood of success. You could choose to let him explore, or you could refuse to play along. But if you choose the latter option, bear in mind that it could lead to more resentment and the potential for dishonesty, which are not good in a healthy relationship.

 

*do drive-in theaters even exist anymore?

[liubit]

In the gay community it is not that hard for men in open relationships to find sex. However, it is much more challenging to find other men to date when you're in an open relationship. And by dating I mean -- moonlight walk on the beach, holding hands under the table at a diner, making out in the car at a drive-in theater*

Like I wrote in post#10 in this thread, I have been in an open relationship with rules for almost 15 years now. I do not see any reason for dating: my partner fulfills all my emotional needs. On the other hand, I need more sex, and that is why I hire escorts, and escorts only (rule 1 in our relationship). I find my emotional balance with my partner, my physical balance with my escorts.

 

A couple of weeks ago, my partner and I hired two escorts (I had already met and vetted both of them myself) and played with them at the same time, but separately. Knowing that the love of my life was in the room next door having a good time with a hot boy I had seen many times, was very sexy. Believe me, the "kiss and tell" session we later had was absolutely priceless.

 

Well, that's just me.

[+ Just Sayin]

All of them deeply love each other and recognize that it's impossible for one person to be everything another person needs all the time.

A good straight friend of mine--far younger than I but wise beyond his years--shared his thoughts about this years ago; it has helped me a great deal to understand myself