Notifying your client of availability

[manTOman]

Let's say you're somewhat of a regular, or at least you've seen a guy multiple times recently, so you're not total strangers meeting up for the first time. However, there is an obstacle, be it he's in a different city, or he's available only for limited periods of time or maybe he can only host occasionally or whatever else it might be. Basically arranging a date is not as simple as: "Are you free Friday?", but it requires a bit more coordination.

 

Now you've clearly told to this guy: "Please let me know next time you're: in town, available, able to host, or whatever the obstacle". And then you find out that he's been in your city, available, able to host or what not for a week and that you haven't been notified at all. What do you make of it? I personally see it as he doesn't want to see me or appreciates my business any longer. Am I wrong?

 

If you're an escort, do you send such notifications to clients, or get notified if you're a client, saying: "Hey, just wanted to let you know I'm in town." - or what not. Especially if you were clearly requested to do so, and especially if you've seen each other at least 3-4 times. Am I asking for too much here or being unreasonable? Or am I right, and simply need to take the hint and leave the guy alone since he most likely doesn't want to see me any longer, even though I haven't the slightest idea as to what might have caused the rift? It just doesn't make sense.

[+ Keith30309]

I wouldn't assume any of those things unless there have been some other indications that he doesn't want to see you. I sometimes never hear back from guys I email/text.

 

Some explanations are 1) he's not terribly organized and forgetful (or has other things going on that distract him and make him appear this way), 2) he isn't even getting the messages (I've personally seen texts I sent not show up on the phone of a guy sitting next to me and the email systems of RM and the others are unreliable), 3) he had a trip arranged for a individual client and wasn't able to see you (though that is no excuse for a polite response).

 

Just ask. If he doesn't want to see you you'll know and can move on but my experience is it is one of the above.

[mike carey]

You've made a few assumptions there. It may well be as you have set out but you can't be sure. He may have been visiting your city but have pre-arranged appointments covering the time he is there. Even if he was available, you may not be at the top of his list. If you see he is visiting, don't rely on your previous request that he contact you, reach out to him. Don't assume that because he didn't contact you that he didn't want to see you.

[MikeyGMin]

Am I asking for too much here or being unreasonable? Or am I right and simply need to take the hint and leave the guy alone since he most likely doesn't want to see me any longer, even though I haven't the slightest idea as to what might have caused the rift? It just doesn't make sense.

 

Yes and no. It's a reasonable enough request, but it does require the escort be very, very organized and do the advance legwork. Some are better at this than others. Some are quite horrible at record keeping and planning.

 

It's unfortunate, but I certainly wouldn't take it personally. You may just have to accept the fact that this particular escort isn't good at notifications and determine whether you can deal with that or not.

 

I would just try to contact him and schedule the appointment. If there is a reason that he doesn't want to see you again ( it does happen ) he will not respond. At that point, you may want to consider whether he is sending you a message, but until then, I would just try to initiate the appointment.

[manTOman]

The thing is that I noticed his "availability" too late and won't be able to make an appointment at this point. That's why I'm slightly ticked off if it's just the organizational thing. Had I known earlier I would have definitely tried to book him.

[+ Keith30309]

Yes and no. It's a reasonable enough request, but it does require the escort be very, very organized and do the advance legwork. Some are better at this than others. Some are quite horrible at record keeping and planning.

 

It's unfortunate, but I certainly wouldn't take it personally. You may just have to accept the fact that this particular escort isn't good at notifications and determine whether you can deal with that or not.

 

I would just try to contact him and schedule the appointment. If there is a reason that he doesn't want to see you again ( it does happen ) he will not respond. At that point, you may want to consider whether he is sending you a message, but until then, I would just try to initiate the appointment.

 

Maybe he's just a major right-brained thinker and he's truly wonderfully intimate. I've met some really sweet guys who couldn't organize or communicate worth a damn but it's worth dealing with.

[MikeyGMin]

The thing is that I noticed his "availability" too late and won't be able to make an appointment at this point. That's why I'm slightly ticked off if it's just the organizational thing. Had I known earlier I would have definitely tried to book him.

 

I can understand being disappointed which would lead to annoyance, but you have to take the good with the bad with these gentlemen. :-) I just wouldn't take it personally until you know for a fact that he is dodging you. Until then, you just have to decide if the pleasure of his company -- when you get it - - is worth the scheduling difficulties.

[mattr]

I don't think you have enough information to determine if he is purposely not contacting you. I would suggest you contact him and tell him how disappointed you are that you will be unable to meet him on his current trip to your area and that perhaps he could contact you in advance on his next trip or post his travel plans somewhere in advance so that you can make plans... See how he responds. That should give you some indication as to whether he wants to see you or not.

[+ DERRIK]

It might be nice to let regulars know he in town - but that assumes he's got some indexing and organizational skills.

 

Some guys do a good job on this aspect of customer service - some do not.

 

Escorting is a complicated business - lots of moving parts - many leads - lots of lookers

[Nvr2Thick]

It might be nice to let regulars know he in town - but that assumes he's got some indexing and organizational skills.

 

Some guys do a good job on this aspect of customer service - some do not.

 

Escorting is a complicated business - lots of moving parts - many leads - lots of lookers

 

Exactly. Some guys will just post their ad and see what happens. Others will try to plan their schedules and do up front marketing. We've also heard from several escorts who try to prearrange meetings with regulars by contacting them, or with new clients with advance ads only to find that the schedule falls apart when people flake.

 

While I was in Miami on business I met an escort traveling from LA. My impression of his trip was that he was out partying with friends and enjoying the Miami scene. If a call came in and he was up for it he would schedule a meeting, but the trip was not primarily about escorting. There are so many different scenarios. It's great when you can find a guy who gives you more focused attention because you're a regular customer, but it's often unexpected.

[MikeyGMin]

It's great when you can find a guy who gives you more focused attention because you're a regular customer, but it's often unexpected.

 

Yeah, I really love the extra attention and priority I get from my regular. I go out of my way to be very good to him and he returns the favor. But he is local so it is much easier.

[Mac64]

I always appreciate notice when a regular is available but don't expect it. Dane Michaels (now retired) besides being one of my favorites, always would give me a heads up when coming to town, usually before he placed his ad so that I had preference in times as well.

[keithhardy]

I can say I honestly try to let guys know when I am visiting their city that have asked me to. With that being said if someone asked me three months ago to let them know when I am in their town sometimes it can slip my mind. As for regulars I do always let them know I will be in town before posting my travel plans, this gives them the first option to book an appointment. I would suggest, because many of us have a lot going on, that if you see someone you like is traveling to your city that you reach out to them, I wouldn't assume anything other than they got side tracked and forgot to reach out to you.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

I agree that not everyone is quite so organized, so if you see him in the area, you should reach out to him. However, you should reinforce your appreciation if he would let you know when he's coming to town and if he doesn't, I would move on. For me, it's a matter of professionalism and he should be making just as much of an effort to stay in touch and connect, as you are. It's as simple as creating folders for each of the cities you regularly visit and saving emails and contacts to those folders. Granted, I don't have that many cities that I regularly visit, but that is how I organize to make sure I get in touch.

[marylander1940]

...

 

If you're an escort, do you send such notifications to clients, or get notified if you're a client, saying: "Hey, just wanted to let you know I'm in town." - or what not. Especially if you were clearly requested to do so, and especially if you've seen each other at least 3-4 times. Am I asking for too much here or being unreasonable? Or am I right, and simply need to take the hint and leave the guy alone since he most likely doesn't want to see me any longer, even though I haven't the slightest idea as to what might have caused the rift? It just doesn't make sense.

 

I know a local escort who travels 3 or 4 times per year to Detroit and has 400 guys on his email list of that city, and other 50 guys on who don't use email and prefer to be notified of his visits by text messages...

 

I always a good idea to some "canvassing" of a city before visiting, collecting emails and let everybody know a week in advance of an escort's visit by email or text.

[manTOman]

It's not a travel thing, but it's the closest thing I could compare it to, since I've always been notified by travelling guys once I expressed interest even when we haven't previously met. Basically it's that neither of us can host, but there are special circumstances which occur very rarely when he's able to. I see now that he has included that info in his profile, but I really don't have a habit of going back and re-reading the same ad in hope that a sentence might change once every two months. So now, I don't think that he doesn't want to see me although I won't be sure until I ask.

I will definitely contact him, and communicate my disappointment since I think he's worth to at least try and work it out. I just needed to know if I'm being completely unrealistic in my expectations.

[MikeyGMin]

I would just take it as a sign that he is busy enough that he doesn't have to work to "pull" clients when he is able to host. Nothing more and nothing less. Not ideal because you would like him to think of you specifically on those occasions, but it's more than likely nothing personal. Just the way he operates.

[down_to_business]

You raise a couple of very distinct and important issues here, so let me give you my take on things.

 

key takeaways for me:

*you are a repeat client and have hired the escort recently

*you requested the escort contact you when he is in your city

 

key questions:

1) are you asking too much?

2) does it mean he doesn't want to see you any more etc?

 

 

My answers:

1- No. You are not asking too much. It is a perfectly reasonable request for you to ask someone who you have or want to have a continuing business relationship with to contact you when they are in your area. I will give you an example. A friend of mine has a very exclusive and busy hairdresser that only comes into town at certain times and yes, every single time that professional contacts all of the clients to let them know even though there is more than enough business to fill up the schedule without doing so. That is just being professional.

 

2- No. You really can't infer anything from it. It could mean that. It could also just as easily mean he is lazy, stupid, inconsiderate, unorganized, or simply takes you for granted.

 

What should you do about it?

 

Well, you didn't ask that question, so I will leave it unanswered for now.

 

Good luck to you in whatever you decide to do. I know I sure don't like being made to feel that way and I would give a really long thought to whether or not I wanted to continue to patronize someone who did.

[manTOman]

I would just take it as a sign that he is busy enough that he doesn't have to work to "pull" clients when he is able to host. Nothing more and nothing less. Not ideal because you would like him to think of you specifically on those occasions, but it's more than likely nothing personal. Just the way he operates.

 

I don't think that's it, since we've met when I provided the venue as well. So I've been flexible that way, but so has he. I still think he's a stellar guy. However him hosting really only helps me a lot, and I don't think it makes much difference to him at all. Anyways, I really don't want to air my dirty laundry in here. All I wanted is to to find out if escorts usually notify their clients of such things or if I'm being a diva.

[curiousnomore]

Maybe he was looking for something different.

The rare times I get to play, I definitely don't get to see everyone I want to see.

There are a ton of reasons why he didn't contact you that have nothing to do with his opinion of you.

You have no more claim on his time than he has of yours.

[manTOman]

Hey [uSER=12155]@Dominiking[/uSER]

I'm not suggesting you randomly contact your clients for hookups.

Let's say, hypothetically speaking, that you and I have met 3-4 times in last 2-3 months. All is great but the scheduling. For me it would be best if we met on Mondays, but that's the only day of the week you're not available due to work, school or any other reason. So we meet at other times but Mondays still remain my preferred day of the week. Then you tell me that you might be free on some Mondays, but very rarely. And I say, how it would be great if you let me know when that happens and I'll make sure to see you. So my question to you is given the circumstances, would you contact me letting me know of your Monday availability or not?

[LADoug1]

I wouldn't assume any of those things unless there have been some other indications that he doesn't want to see you. I sometimes never hear back from guys I email/text.

 

Some explanations are 1) he's not terribly organized and forgetful (or has other things going on that distract him and make him appear this way), 2) he isn't even getting the messages (I've personally seen texts I sent not show up on the phone of a guy sitting next to me and the email systems of RM and the others are unreliable), 3) he had a trip arranged for a individual client and wasn't able to see you (though that is no excuse for a polite response).

 

Just ask. If he doesn't want to see you you'll know and can move on but my experience is it is one of the above.

 

I agree with the above. I would also add that if he was REALLY organized/thoughtful he might give you a heads up that he was going to be/had been in your city but it will be/was impossible to setup a time to see you. That way you would not be left wondering as you are now.