Advice on payments for an on-going arrangement

[american executive]

Hey friends:

 

I need your advice. I am establishing an on-going arrangment. Probably meeting with the guy once or twice a week. As well, we are planning some weekends away. I think if the guys turns out to be as nice as he seems I might take him to Europe for a week.

 

What is a fair price; for time only. Since it is on-going is there a different recomended price for meeting weekly?

What is a fair hourly rate?

Overnight rate - I guess 18 hours?

Weekend rate?

 

Thanks for your help

[jawjateck]

Mutually agreeable monthly stipend perhaps? If you want to see him that often, go for the "volume" discount.

[robberbaron4u]

My own, unhappy experience with such an arrangement was that. over time, attentiveness to my needs waned, slowly, with the guarantee of a monthly stipend and housing.

[+ Keith30309]

I had a similar situation for a few months with a companion I was seeing twice a week. Poor communications and level setting of expectations lead to resentment on his part and a feeling of being taken advantage of on mine.

 

This may sound like overkill but have a serious chat about exactly who will do what, what you are expecting of him, how to handle and prioritize schedule conflicts (I.e., he wants/needs to make another booking during your time or you need to reschedule and want him to accommodate you), any special requests you anticipate (a weekend, a third person joining, etc).

 

Not exactly sexy but it'll help avoid resentment and conflict.

[jawjateck]

I have tried it twice with excellent results. Here's my thoughts: like keith suggests, have a sit down, talk, flesh out the details, and both parties lay out the expectations. There is no "guarantee; it's month to month. Either party can call it quits whenever. Don't intertwine your lives with housing arrangements. My situations worked well with bright, fun, sexy college students. Note: I said college students, not college-age. These guys were actually enrolled and busting their ass in school to pursue a career, thus there was a built in ending. They would graduate, take a professional job, and move on. Ideal! They fulfilled all of our expectations, and I never missed a payment. They seemed to really enjoy it too. They went to shows, sporting events, and trips they would never have experienced otherwise, and guys that age are not good actors or able to feign interest generally. They liked the time with me, and of course, the stipend, and I enjoyed my romps with them. WIN WIN!

 

I would never consider this with guys who have been around the block, been in and out of the biz, been in and out and mostly/currently in financial trouble. Their troubles become yours. Good luck, whatever you choose.

[robberbaron4u]

I have tried it twice with excellent results. Here's my thoughts: like keith suggests, have a sit down, talk, flesh out the details, and both parties lay out the expectations. There is no "guarantee; it's month to month. Either party can call it quits whenever. Don't intertwine your lives with housing arrangements. My situations worked well with bright, fun, sexy college students. Note: I said college students, not college-age. These guys were actually enrolled and busting their ass in school to pursue a career, thus there was a built in ending. They would graduate, take a professional job, and move on. Ideal! They fulfilled all of our expectations, and I never missed a payment. They seemed to really enjoy it too. They went to shows, sporting events, and trips they would never have experienced otherwise, and guys that age are not good actors or able to feign interest generally. They liked the time with me, and of course, the stipend, and I enjoyed my romps with them. WIN WIN!

 

I would never consider this with guys who have been around the block, been in and out of the biz, been in and out and mostly/currently in financial trouble. Their troubles become yours. Good luck, whatever you choose.

And pursuing the latter scenario was my mistake. . .

[cany10011]

I've had good luck with with guys in university/college with a defined timeline who are not professionals and only doing this to subsidize income as an alternate to low-paying service jobs. For my previous guy, i gave him a check twice a month in exchange for one or two overnights weekly. It was a nice arrangement that we agreed to after 2 or 3 sessions. This lasted about 3 years. He is now married with a wife living on a farm in Virginia.

[caliguy]

 

What is a fair price; for time only. Since it is on-going is there a different recomended price for meeting weekly?

What is a fair hourly rate?

Overnight rate - I guess 18 hours?

Weekend rate?

This is only the averages paid. Not saying what you should do though.

 

Twice a week/350-400

Hourly/ 200-300

Overnight/ 1000-1500

Wknd/ 2500-3500

[jimboivyo]

Hey friends:

 

I need your advice. I am establishing an on-going arrangment. Probably meeting with the guy once or twice a week. As well, we are planning some weekends away. I think if the guys turns out to be as nice as he seems I might take him to Europe for a week.

 

What is a fair price; for time only. Since it is on-going is there a different recomended price for meeting weekly?

What is a fair hourly rate?

Overnight rate - I guess 18 hours?

Weekend rate?

 

Thanks for your help

 

 

fair is what the two of you discuss. not what a bunch of total strangers tell you

 

communicate with him. here you're going to get a million diffrent answers