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Should I tell this guy my feelings?

joselowe

By joselowe
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joselowe Enthusiast

joselowe

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So I met this guy in the Dominican Republic and instantly feel for him, he's 19 and I'm 27. He was working at a "massage parlor" and we had sexual intercourse for a fee.

 

I started to get feelings for him after this one time encounter so I got his phone number from one of his friends who also worked there.

 

I later saw him this November and he informed me that he no longer works at that massage parlor (which is true) and all of those feelings came back. We hooked up a few more times and eventually started hanging out and going out on dates.

 

After I left the Dominican Republic he started to get really personal with me and we got close and spoke every single day over whatsapp. I went above and beyond for him and wanted to move him to the US with me and he would tell me stuff like he loves me and cant wait to be with me and opened up a lot to me. I started to fall in love....but then he asked me to send him some money a few days ago.... I sent him $200 and he responded with a thank you and a heart emoji on whatsapp.

 

A day later he messages me saying hey and calls me by another man's name (def an american male name, not a Dominican name) and the name isnt even anywhere close to my name. So I responded with "wrong costumer" and a thumbs down emoji. He later wrote me 1 day later saying "hey how are you?"

 

He literally broke my heart and I've been crying for the past 2 days. I don't know if I should tell tell him how I feel or simply ignore him and get over him? My friends have been telling me to just ignore him, but it's soo hard since I love him and even though I'm pissed I feel like I might not be able to move on from him until I tell him how I feel and how much he hurt me....

 

I don't know what to do...should I tell him how I feel or not respond and just try to move on?

 

Any advice?

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sincitymix Mentor

sincitymix

Posted
Posted
So I met this guy in the Dominican Republic and instantly feel for him, he's 19 and I'm 27. He was working at a "massage parlor" and we had sexual intercourse for a fee.

 

I started to get feelings for him after this one time encounter so I got his phone number from one of his friends who also worked there.

 

I later saw him this November and he informed me that he no longer works at that massage parlor (which is true) and all of those feelings came back. We hooked up a few more times and eventually started hanging out and going out on dates.

 

After I left the Dominican Republic he started to get really personal with me and we got close and spoke every single day over whatsapp. I went above and beyond for him and wanted to move him to the US with me and he would tell me stuff like he loves me and cant wait to be with me and opened up a lot to me. I started to fall in love....but then he asked me to send him some money a few days ago.... I sent him $200 and he responded with a thank you and a heart emoji on whatsapp.

 

A day later he messages me saying hey and calls me by another man's name (def an american male name, not a Dominican name) and the name isnt even anywhere close to my name. So I responded with "wrong costumer" and a thumbs down emoji. He later wrote me 1 day later saying "hey how are you?"

 

He literally broke my heart and I've been crying for the past 2 days. I don't know if I should tell tell him how I feel or simply ignore him and get over him? My friends have been telling me to just ignore him, but it's soo hard since I love him and even though I'm pissed I feel like I might not be able to move on from him until I tell him how I feel and how much he hurt me....

 

I don't know what to do...should I tell him how I feel or not respond and just try to move on?

 

Any advice?

 

This happened to me once. You need to move on and fast. He is using you as a ATM. He will keep asking for more money. An excuse will come up. My rent is late, im going to be evicted. I need money for this. Can you buy me this or that. I am sure you both shared personal things about yourselves, but it is a strategy. Im going to stop typing now, as things brings up some memories I don't want to repeat.. and ill come across as a hate filled bitter acid spewing bitch of a C*nt.

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FreshFluff Grand Master

+ FreshFluff

Posted
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Joselowe, I messaged you. I'd suggest you find others who've traveled to these places and have been through the same thing.

 

Once you heal, I think that the best thing you can do is get back on the horse. Go to bars here and meet guys, or take another trip to the DR, Asia, or Brazil. As a young man, you will be very popular among sex workers in all these countries.

 

Whatever you do, please don't send this guy any more money. Remember that whatever he's texting to you, he may be texting to a lot of other customers at the same time.

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seaboy4hire Mentor

seaboy4hire

Posted
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PS I am not racists but my extended family is black and Domicican..... Need I say anything else? Having lived in MA and Detorit I've felt with a LOT of Dominicans..... Like.... Seaboy you say it. I can't. Lol. (I've never had a white boyfriend for the guy who says I'm racist)

 

Brian was that English? May I have a translation?

 

Hugs,

Greg

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purplekow Grand Master

+ purplekow

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Adios to this asshole and onto the future. Or....you can string him along. Tell him you want him to come to the US. You are expecting a large inheritance from a recently deceased aunt but it is tied up in probate. You have a great chance to get an apartment in Miami which would be a great place for him to live while you get things straightened out but you need $1000 dollars to close the deal on the apartment and you do not have it. It is too bad he is so strapped for funds because you would love for him to live in this luxury apartment. If he can get $500 perhaps you can get the other $500. You have a month. Then it gets moved up suddenly and you need the money sooner. Oh wait, that's a scam, like the one this asshole pulled.

Every time you think to yourself that you love this guy you must say three times out loud: Do Not Be a Jackass he is a con man. Repeat it until you believe it.

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sincitymix Mentor

sincitymix

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Adios to this asshole and onto the future. Or....you can string him along. Tell him you want him to come to the US. You are expecting a large inheritance from a recently deceased aunt but it is tied up in probate. You have a great chance to get an apartment in Miami which would be a great place for him to live while you get things straightened out but you need $1000 dollars to close the deal on the apartment and you do not have it. It is too bad he is so strapped for funds because you would love for him to live in this luxury apartment. If he can get $500 perhaps you can get the other $500. You have a month. Then it gets moved up suddenly and you need the money sooner. Oh wait, that's a scam, like the one this asshole pulled.

Every time you think to yourself that you love this guy you must say three times out loud: Do Not Be a Jackass he is a con man. Repeat it until you believe it.

 

Or if he is always asking you to send him stuff. ask him to send you something.. I bet he will say no.

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Juan Vancouver Collaborator

Juan Vancouver

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I am so sorry to read you are grieving. Even though you may not really know who he really is and even though the whole thing might have been an illusion with the intent of taking advantage of you, I know the pain and the sorrow you are feeling are real. I sincerely hope you will heal soon.

 

And when you do... Please tattoo this on both hands, on your dick, on your eyelids... do not ever try to date or get in a relationship with a sex worker in a third world country. (I would say with any sex worker at all, but this is even more true if they are poor). If you start a relationship as client-escort, regardless of how much you might like one another the money-power dynamic will never end. You will always feel afraid he is not in love with you and that he doesn't want you, he will always feel that you will dump him the minute he stops putting out.

 

Dating an escort, when you met him as a client, is just like you saw in the movies. Sadly, most people think it's like Pretty Woman, but in truth, in the best case scenario, it's more like Moulin Rouge; everyone suffers, girl's gotta work, people go mad with jealousy, hooker dies in the end, and you are left with an unmendable broken heart.

 

Hiring a sex worker is not a good way to explore the dating pool.

 

I am sending you a big hug, and cuddles. Make yourself a nice cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows, watch a good chickflick, have a cry and remember that this too, shall pass. Hope you feel better soon.

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joselowe Enthusiast

joselowe

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I am so sorry to read you are grieving. Even though you may not really know who he really is and even though the whole thing might have been an illusion with the intent of taking advantage of you, I know the pain and the sorrow you are feeling are real. I sincerely hope you will heal soon.

 

And when you do... Please tattoo this on both hands, on your dick, on your eyelids... do not ever try to date or get in a relationship with a sex worker in a third world country. (I would say with any sex worker at all, but this is even more true if they are poor). If you start a relationship as client-escort, regardless of how much you might like one another the money-power dynamic will never end. You will always feel afraid he is not in love with you and that he doesn't want you, he will always feel that you will dump him the minute he stops putting out.

 

Dating an escort, when you met him as a client, is just like you saw in the movies. Sadly, most people think it's like Pretty Woman, but in truth, in the best case scenario, it's more like Moulin Rouge; everyone suffers, girl's gotta work, people go mad with jealousy, hooker dies in the end, and you are left with an unmendable broken heart.

 

Hiring a sex worker is not a good way to explore the dating pool.

 

I am sending you a big hug, and cuddles. Make yourself a nice cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows, watch a good chickflick, have a cry and remember that this too, shall pass. Hope you feel better soon.

Wow thanks soo much for this response. Really helps

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Brian Kevin Rising Star

Brian Kevin

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Posted

Yeah. It was a 15 hr ride. I took a tyloen PM and three shots of whiskey to get asleep because somebody didn't know how to hanle there child. I eventually just sat in the cafe cart looking like death. I'm in bed now. Finally. I took Amtrak, my favorite. I hate flying. My ass is far too wide for any kind of seat.

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Donpat Rookie

Donpat

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Joselowe, I'm sorry for the pain you have had, and know it all too well. Mine, neither fortunately or unfortunately, is all with American based jerks (well, one is of Cuban heritage, but that's a whole other story). Some things pop out at me that I want to share. First, there has been some very direct replies that all say pretty much the same thing. Cut the cord, cut your losses, move on, and do your best to put this guy out of your mind and heart. Easier said than done, but possible. The second thing I am really blown away by is all the care and concern and truly comforting things being said here, and all the authentic offers of help and advice. Focus on that part, and it will help the pain. Scars will remain, but they can become stars. My instinct is you are a man full of love, and this will not impact that. You are going to be the exact perfect fit with your other half walks into your life. And even though I am very sure that that ship sailed for me, I have EVERY confidence your ship is going to come in and soon. Peace, my friend, and serenity

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joselowe Enthusiast

joselowe

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Joselowe, I'm sorry for the pain you have had, and know it all too well. Mine, neither fortunately or unfortunately, is all with American based jerks (well, one is of Cuban heritage, but that's a whole other story). Some things pop out at me that I want to share. First, there has been some very direct replies that all say pretty much the same thing. Cut the cord, cut your losses, move on, and do your best to put this guy out of your mind and heart. Easier said than done, but possible. The second thing I am really blown away by is all the care and concern and truly comforting things being said here, and all the authentic offers of help and advice. Focus on that part, and it will help the pain. Scars will remain, but they can become stars. My instinct is you are a man full of love, and this will not impact that. You are going to be the exact perfect fit with your other half walks into your life. And even though I am very sure that that ship sailed for me, I have EVERY confidence your ship is going to come in and soon. Peace, my friend, and serenity

Thank you soo much Donpat...and I'm sure the ship hasnt sailed for you, someone will come along one day

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