Should I Talk About Escorts I Fancy or STFU?

[mike carey]

I came to this site earlier this year after having read Daddy's Reviews for some time. I confess it was to find out more about a particular escort but I have found it useful beyond that quest.

 

I find myself commenting about escorts, saying that they are the sort of men I would like to meet, and at times making unguarded comments that could well be construed as stalking. I have made comments to the effect that I would like to meet. In some cases I damn well want to meet if I'm ever is a nearby zip code, but in others it's more that it would be nice to meet if things worked out right.

 

I've engaged in chats here, in PMs and in some cases e-mail exchanges, some escorts have been extremely generous with their time (for which I am eternally grateful). There are escorts I have hinted I would like to meet and others I have just chatted to.

 

I wonder whether there are any implied rules about this, and more particularly whether I have breached any of them. Some escorts seem to want to limit their conversations to other men who are about to hire them, others see open discusions as being part of what they have to do to market themselves. Am I overthinking all of this?

[marylander1940]

Some escorts seem to want to limit their conversations to other men who are about to hire them, others see open discusions as being part of what they have to do to market themselves. Am I overthinking all of this?

 

I don't know what kind of conversations you had with them or the subjects, but I guess many of them who are based in the U.S. would like to talk to you once you have specific plans to travel to their city or if they have plans to travel to Canberra.

[+ Truereview]

In my opinion, as long as you are not leading anyone on or causing anyone a headache or heartache (including yourself), I see no harm. Also give yourself some grace, we all can come across in unintended ways...graceful recovery and owning the impact is the key. Lastly, overthinking can be rooted in caring and empathy. To me, Mike, your "overthinking" seems rooted in positive intent.

[mike carey]

I have always talked about my plans to visit the US, to some it may not be specific enough. In some cases, when I say I hope to be in the US for some specific event it may sound as if I am saying I'll be there and I want to meet you, when all I'm saying is that I hope to be there for the event. Clearly there is scope for me to nuance what I say!

[+ poolboy48220]

I've done the same and have received a few nice emails from escorts. Unfortunately, few if any have gelled into a trip to Michigan.

[MikeyGMin]

I've engaged in chats here, in PMs and in some cases e-mail exchanges, some escorts have been extremely generous with their time (for which I am eternally grateful). There are escorts I have hinted I would like to meet and others I have just chatted to.

 

Just the fact that you are concerned about how it is perceived by the escorts shows empathy and good intent. People can take message boards entirely too seriously. Post what you want when you want and to whomever you want in the open threads. No escort in his right mind is going to be upset that someone says they would like to meet him even if it is logistically near impossible.

 

PMs and emails are a little more tricky. Not because they are rude or out of line, just because of the volume an escort may receive. You are obviously too nice of a guy to call them out on it (which would not be fair to them anyway.) Just don't get too bummed if they simply don't have the time to respond. They are working guys and time management is essential. :)

[Nvr2Thick]

It's an open forum. I don't see any problem in expressing your opinions based on what you know. I personally have a problem with when someone gets enthusiastic (or the opposite) about an escort he's never met, and doesn't make that clear. I doesn't violate policy; it's just not all that helpful. If I asked for recommendations for a hung black top, for example, I'd want a better recommendation than "J.D. Daniels!" - with no indication that the forum member had ever met him. If you just like an escort's ad or his rep you should probably stay out of it, or at least say where your endorsement is coming from. Discussing our mutual interests can be encouraging. It gets tiresome when someone's looking for a recommendation and another member steps in time and time again, for example, to say how he's not interested in a certain escort because the escort doesn't bottom or he doesn't care for his looks.

 

We're here to talk about escorts, so most anything is fair game. I'd try not to divert, derail, or hijack a thread with your own opinions even if they are well-intentioned.

[mike carey]

Just don't get too bummed if they simply don't have the time to respond. They are working guys and time management is essential.

I have never been concerned if they don't reply. I know they are busy. The fact that some of them do reply is wonderful! I plan to visit the US next year and there are men on my wish list. There are also men on my must do list, even though that may not happen. whichever list they are on now, it will all come down to the possible at the time!

[JDXXX]

It's an open forum. I don't see any problem in expressing your opinions based on what you know. I personally have a problem with when someone gets enthusiastic (or the opposite) about an escort he's never met, and doesn't make that clear. I doesn't violate policy; it's just not all that helpful. If I asked for recommendations for a hung black top, for example, I'd want a better recommendation than "J.D. Daniels!" - with no indication that the forum member had ever met him. If you just like an escort's ad or his rep you should probably stay out of it, or at least say where your endorsement is coming from. Discussing our mutual interests can be encouraging. It gets tiresome when someone's looking for a recommendation and another member steps in time and time again, for example, to say how he's not interested in a certain escort because the escort doesn't bottom or he doesn't care for his looks.

 

We're here to talk about escorts, so most anything is fair game. I'd try not to divert, derail, or hijack a thread with your own opinions even if they are well-intentioned.

 

Pardon me(sorry to interrupt here), but why is my name in your post coming up in such a negative light?

 

I don't understand why my name has to be brought up in such awful terms like a awful human being or have a bad reputation of some kind. .

 

Hopefully my name came up based on "example" as I don't want to give members a bad impression.

 

This maybe an open forum, but still people(based on that commit you made) can get the wrong idea, you know. .

 

Just curious as my post is out of concern.

[+ not2rowdy]

JDXXX - As a reader I didn’t take the comment as a negative towards you.

 

I think the poster was saying that recommending someone - without the person making the recommendation having ever met “that someone” - is not all that helpful.

 

But I can also see how others might have interpreted the comment more like you did.

 

For the poster it would have been better to just have used a generic “escort X”.

 

Maybe he he will clarify.

 

But your reputation is not damaged with me.

[mike carey]

Pardon me, but why is my name in your post coming up in such a negative light?

JD, I think what he said was unfortunte, but not necessarily negative. I took what Nvr2thick was saying to mean that a random recommendation of Escort X is not enough, but he used your name rather than 'Escort X'. Many of us here love you, JD, but if people want recommendations for a hung African American top, they want to hear I've met JD, not I've heard of JD. As you know I have heard of you, not met you!!

[Guest countryboywny]

JD, I'd take it as a compliment! When he was discussing a "hung, black top" your name came to him.

[JDXXX]

Oh I see.

 

Thanks for clarifying his post more in detail as after reading it over and over - it does make sense now of what he was trying to say for which my name came up as an example as you all said.

 

My deepest and sincere apologies, Gentlemen as I am truly sorry as his post was a misunderstanding on my part.

 

As you know, there has been a few "negative" comments about me on a few threads recently, and just being careful to make sure nothing else "negative or false" is being said about me on another threads as such comments can hurt or damage a person's reputation due over past accusations or assumptions that are clearly unnecessary at times, but it happens.

 

Sorry for taking what Nvr2thick said in a offensive manner as I'm only trying to be careful, and keep my head above water in upholding a good reputation. .

[JDXXX]

JDXXX - As a reader I didn’t take the comment as a negative towards you.

 

I think the poster was saying that recommending someone - without the person making the recommendation having ever met “that someone” - is not all that helpful.

 

But I can also see how others might have interpreted the comment more like you did.

 

For the poster it would have been better to just have used a generic “escort X”.

 

Maybe he he will clarify.

 

But your reputation is not damaged with me.

 

Thank you Not2rowdy. Your sweet, and do appreciate your kind words. Very comforting to know. . Truly appreciate your comment very much.

 

JD, I think what he said was unfortunate, but not necessarily negative. I took what Nvr2thick was saying to mean that a random recommendation of Escort X is not enough, but he used your name rather than 'Escort X'. Many of us here love you, JD, but if people want recommendations for a hung African American top, they want to hear I've met JD, not I've heard of JD. As you know I have heard of you, not met you!!

 

Thank you, Mike. Means a lot to receive such love from you and many others here on the forum.

 

JD, I'd take it as a compliment! When he was discussing a "hung, black top" your name came to him.

 

You're right, Countryboyny. Didn't see his point at first, but now I do after you all made me see the light of his example a lot better in detail.

 

Thanks you guys.

 

Your awesome!!!!

 

HUGS:cool:

[Nvr2Thick]

Pardon me(sorry to interrupt here), but why is my name in your post coming up in such a negative light?

 

I don't understand why my name has to be brought up in such awful terms like a awful human being or have a bad reputation of some kind. .

 

Hopefully my name came up based on "example" as I don't want to give members a bad impression.

 

This maybe an open forum, but still people(based on that commit you made) can get the wrong idea, you know. .

 

Just curious as my post is out of concern.

 

I apologize if my post was not clear. I wanted to explain a scenario where a forum member offers a useless recommendation. He's just offering up the name of someone he's enthusiastic about, and not someone he's had experience with. I do think it ties back to the OP's question about discussing escorts he'd like to meet. I've tried to touch on the positive as well as the less useful ways of doing so. I did try to provide as much explanation as I could, wrapped around an example. I could not think of a way to explain my point without an example. I'm sorry to have singled you out. You seemed like the perfect example for me since I tend toward skilled hung black tops, and you've generated a lot of enthusiasm on this forum.

 

Quite frankly, I don't think what I said was overly negative, let alone "awful". There's a reason I went with "I personally have a problem with" the behavior I've described rather than saying it was wrong. I also noted some positive aspects of discussing escorts we're interested in but have not experienced.

[JDXXX]

I apologize if my post was not clear. I wanted to explain a scenario where a forum member offers a useless recommendation. He's just offering up the name of someone he's enthusiastic about, and not someone he's had experience with. I do think it ties back to the OP's question about discussing escorts he'd like to meet. I've tried to touch on the positive as well as the less useful ways of doing so. I did try to provide as much explanation as I could, wrapped around an example. I could not think of a way to explain my point without an example. I'm sorry to have singled you out. You seemed like the perfect example for me since I tend toward skilled hung black tops, and you've generated a lot of enthusiasm on this forum.

 

Quite frankly, I don't think what I said was overly negative, let alone "awful". There's a reason I went with "I personally have a problem with" the behavior I've described rather than saying it was wrong. I also noted some positive aspects of discussing escorts we're interested in but have not experienced.

 

No worries, baby. I totally get now where you were coming from, and do appreciate your sincere response as it was my fault for taking your post the wrong way as it was meant out of good intentions.

 

Don't worry Nvr2thick - still luv ya anyways. . LOL.

 

HUGS,

[Juan Vancouver]

Am I overthinking all of this?

 

Only maybe a little...

 

Don't worry about being enthusiastic about people you want to meet. Most escorts are familiar with that and will only be flattered. Feel free to comment on whatever you want to comment. There are no rules. You are always consistently respectful and thoughtful so I don't see how you could do anything wrong.

 

As for private messages, I guess it really depends on every particular escort and how busy they happen to be at the moment. You don't come across as pushy or needing a lot of attention and continued communication so I would say go ahead and message them. This is especially the case if -as you said- won't be too hurt if they don't answer.

 

Only thing I would recommend is to be clear about the fact that your plans are only aspirational, not factual. And I mean be VERY clear. Many of us lack the ability to understanding subtlety. Last thing you need is to get a pissy escort angry because he failed to understand that you don't actually have plans to visit him.

 

Aside from that, there's no rules. The world is your oyster! Have fun and continue to share your kind, intelligent self with us.

 

Thank you for that. =)

[Decatur Guy]

The primary point of the website is to learn more about prospective new hires and to share what you know about people you've already hired. It's hard to do that if you don't discuss the particulars.

 

Heck, we have a thread each new year that's a wish list -- folks you've never met but hope to meet in the coming year.

 

I don't see anything wrong with any of that unless you just get very obsessive or overboard about it. I once told a now-retired escort on here I was developing something of a crush on him before I ever met him. And I think he took it in the proper spirit -- he met me twice and lives on the opposite coast.

 

So I think you're A-OK here. Juan V's reply was spot-on.

[jawjateck]

It's fantasy. Chat away til you are satiated.