Think I might have discovered an HIV+ escort not disclosing his status on his listing

[pjp1492]

Came across a listing that definitely caught my attention, but the ad is new so I did some digging.

 

One of the things I've done is to take a phone number from a listing and search for it on Facebook. Often it pops up a person's Facebook page and you can tell if the person in the ad is actually the person running the ad. It's not meant to invade their privacy - it's just doing a quick check to make sure the ad isn't from a fraud.

 

Anyway, I did a search for the number and it popped up a Facebook page that seemed to match his identity. So far, so good.

 

But then I discovered that the guy running the ad is also a writer and has written a handful of news articles (using his real name) about his experiences being HIV+.

 

So yeah, that's a bit disturbing, especially considering he also appears to be entering the porn world. And because he lists "Anything goes" on his RM profile.

 

Obviously we live in an era where being positive isn't what it was 30 years ago. And I have absolutely no problem with positive escorts existing, as long as they're up-front about their status. But I'm not sure what is up with this guy and I thought I'd point it out to the folks here.

[AdamSmith]

So yeah, that's a bit disturbing, especially considering he also appears to be entering the porn world (he's listed as a model on pure-casting.com and has been featured on QueerMeNow). And because he lists "Anything goes" on his RM profile.

 

If for "Safe/BB" he lists "Anything goes," what would you expect his HIV status to be?

[jimboivyo]

did you expect common sense from a fella who allows bare back escort play?

 

not disclosing his status and knowingly bare backing is a felony in some places. don't reckon he is smart enough to know that or understand the consequence.

[stop]

where in his ad does he say he is HIV negative? is there a new law that requires pros to advertise their HIV status? I suspect there are quite a few that don't put it in an ad but will disclose to a person they are having sex with.

 

since rentmen only promotes payment for time NOT for sex I don't see how he is required to disclose his status.

 

by the way in California there is a very large fine for disclosing somebody else's HIV status without their permission. it's agains the law. many other states and cities have similar laws.

 

I find it totally offensive that you would write this message with no proof other than some internet trolling. how do you know the guy with the ad is not using somebody else's pictures? did he lie to you about his HIV status? how do you know he doesn't disclose upfront before having sex with other people. do you know first hand that he has told people he was negative but in fact he is positive?

 

I have been HIV + for over 25 years. I always disclose my status to people before I have sex with them. I would never say I am HIV negative to somebody. but I don't put that I am positive on all profiles I have. I don't because of BIGOTED people like you that are so quick to judge other people without having all the facts.

[big-n-tall]

He is so my type in so many ways. I have nothing against hiv+ escorts. To my knowledge I've haven't hired one who was.

However, as much he is my type, knowing if he is hiv+ would prevent me from hiring.

 

Sometimes I get too much in my own head. I would be so paranoid, thinking about being extra cautious. I would be thinking too much about the experience and probably couldn't maintain... no matter how hot the guy was.

[seaboy4hire]

As an escort who is very open up my status (I am HIV positive) this posting reeks. There could be a very good chance the guy does disclose on a need to know basis. Just like outting someone for being gay or bi outting someone's assumed HIV can have grave consequences for that person. There's a saying think twice before speaking once. I think that applies to the op.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[pjp1492]

If for "Safe/BB" he lists "Anything goes," what would you expect his HIV status to be?

The advent of Truvada has made things like this a bit more complicated.

 

As for the poster above, I do take offense to being labeled as bigoted for pointing this out. I have positive friends and I would never point something like this out with ill intent.

 

Perhaps the escort in question does disclose his status when contacted. I hope he does. But I think if you're an HIV+ escort, you should probably be as up front about it as possible, and I think that should include putting it in a listing. Because it still is a justifiable concern for many.

 

In any case, I sincerely apologize for any offense caused. Positive individuals should absolutely be a welcome part of a community like this.

[pjp1492]

I've edited out the link to the escort ad in question out of respect for the escort and the HIV+ members of this forum.

 

Again, my sincere apologies. But hopefully this can be a productive discussion about what level of disclosure should be expected in this sort of situation. Because I think it's a valuable subject to discuss.

[+ WhamIAm]

No escort (or anyone else) should be or is obligated to disclose his status to the world when posting a listing to spend time together, whether as an escort or a hook-up. I'd hope he'd do so one-on-one, which is why personal contact is important. If he doesn't mention his status, ask. It's your job to protect yourself.

 

And, there are so many ads, escort and non-escort, that don't mention status that it's a bit naive to assume that no mention = negative. Frankly, I no longer even ask. Truvada and a condom are enough for me (see last sentence above). YMMV.

 

And and, your question is a more-than-reasonable topic of discussion. I Google the hell out of phone numbers and pics on a new escort too. We need to protect ourselves from both ripoffs and danger. But, listing personally identifying identification of the escort's "stage name" was very poor form. It seems like you've realized that, so good for you. Take care of yourself.

[pjp1492]

And and, posting the name was very poor form. It seems like you've realized that, so good for you. Take care of yourself.

For those coming late to this thread, just a quick bit of clarification: At no point did I post the escort's actual name in this thread. That it something I would absolutely never do on this forum under any circumstance.

 

I listed his RM listing, which obviously included his escort name. Which, as I've acknowledged, was a mistake given the sensitivity of the discussion. Again, apologies for any offense caused.

[+ WhamIAm]

Fixed. And, apology accepted. Thanks.

[jimboivyo]

No escort (or anyone else) should be or is obligated to disclose his status to the world when posting a listing to spend time together, whether as an escort or a hook-up. I'd hope he'd do so one-on-one, which is why personal contact is important. If he doesn't mention his status, ask. It's your job to protect yourself.

 

but keep in mind that with all of this talk about legalizing escorting, it's only a matter of time before escorts will be required to disclose and or get tested regularly. why not start now, let folks know where you stand and avoid the game playing and problems?

 

obligated, no. but when you're selling yourself, it just makes you a decent human to be up front about that kind of thing.

 

wish all guys working out there were as honest and good as greg. it's admirable.

[AdamSmith]

As for the poster above, I do take offense to being labeled as bigoted for pointing this out. I have positive friends and I would never point something like this out with ill intent.

If that's how it came across, I expressed myself poorly, and I apologize. My intent was not to label you as bigoted, nor to impute ill intent. What I meant was that, by listing "Anything goes" in the "Safe/BB" category, the escort is, to me, sending a fairly clear, honest message that his services are for clients who do not consider HIV an issue they worry about, for whatever reason. (Whether because the client is positive, or the client is willing to risk infection, or the client is on Truvada, or some other reason.)

[pjp1492]

If that's how it came across, I expressed myself poorly, and I apologize. My intent was not to label you as bigoted, nor to impute ill intent. What I meant was that, by listing "Anything goes" in the "Safe/BB" category, the escort is, to me, sending a fairly clear, honest message that his services are for clients who do not consider HIV an issue, for whatever reason. (Whether because the client is positive, or the client is willing to risk infection, or the client is on Truvada, or some other reason.)

No worries.

 

I was actually referring not to you, but to the poster who flat-out called me bigoted. I should have clarified the poster to whom I was referring.

[Rudynate]

Came across a listing that definitely caught my attention, but the ad is new so I did some digging.

 

One of the things I've done is to take a phone number from a listing and search for it on Facebook. Often it pops up a person's Facebook page and you can tell if the person in the ad is actually the person running the ad. It's not meant to invade their privacy - it's just doing a quick check to make sure the ad isn't from a fraud.

 

Anyway, I did a search for the number and it popped up a Facebook page that seemed to match his identity. So far, so good.

 

But then I discovered that the guy running the ad is also a writer and has written a handful of news articles (using his real name) about his experiences being HIV+.

 

So yeah, that's a bit disturbing, especially considering he also appears to be entering the porn world. And because he lists "Anything goes" on his RM profile.

 

Obviously we live in an era where being positive isn't what it was 30 years ago. And I have absolutely no problem with positive escorts existing, as long as they're up-front about their status. But I'm not sure what is up with this guy and I thought I'd point it out to the folks here.

 

You don't seriously believe that he is the first poz escort who hasn't disclosed his status in this profile? I wouldn't expect it of someone. I would expect a straight answer if I asked him, but there's no guarantee that he will answer honestly. Which is why, if you're going to play in this sandbox, you need to keep your wits about you.

[Juan Vancouver]

At no point did I post the escort's actual name in this thread. That it something I would absolutely never do on this forum under any circumstance.

 

I listed his RM listing, which obviously included his escort name.

 

You didn't post his real name, but posted his escort name and let us know how easy it is to find all his information googling his number.

 

It's absolutely none of your business. Yes, it was intrusive and possibly illegal.

 

But beyond the legalities... do we really want to live in a world where we are playing "got cha!" with one another? He says anything goes in his ad, which is morse code for I am or I am comfortable with positive people. We are adults. If posting that would not make you ask him directly, then you are not an adult and should not be having sex.

 

Yes, willingly exposing someone to HIV is unconscionable. The same goes for outing people publicly.

[stop]

The advent of Truvada has made things like this a bit more complicated.

 

As for the poster above, I do take offense to being labeled as bigoted for pointing this out. I have positive friends and I would never point something like this out with ill intent.

 

Perhaps the escort in question does disclose his status when contacted. I hope he does. But I think if you're an HIV+ escort, you should probably be as up front about it as possible, and I think that should include putting it in a listing. Because it still is a justifiable concern for many.

 

In any case, I sincerely apologize for any offense caused. Positive individuals should absolutely be a welcome part of a community like this.

 

I'm sorry but saying "I have positive friends" is like when people say "I have black friends". what exactly does that mean? actions speak more than words. you say you wouldn't point this out with ill intent, but then what was the whole point of your posting if not to accuse this gentleman of being positive like its a bad thing.

 

HIV status shouldn't just be a concern for many it should be a concern for all, BUT it is a personal issue between two concenting adults. if you had proof this gentleman was knowingly infecting others then by all means you should be raising the alarm , but your post accuses somebody of being HIV positive without any real evidence and in doing the post you are implying it is a bad thing to be poz.

 

yes the escort should be upfront but he doesn't have to advertise that he is positive.

 

that said I want to give you props and a thank you for

a) taking down the link to his profile. I appreciate you doing that.

b) you did not disclose what you think his real name is.

and c) your apology. I am guessing from your response that you are sincere in your apology and you were a bit surprised by the response. we have all said or done things that didn't turn out how we intended so I cannot judge you harshly in this regard.

 

I am sorry if I have come across as too aggressive in my responses but after living with this for 25 years I am still frustrated with how the gay community judges people with HIV whether intentional or unintentional after all these years. it doesn't matter how somebody became HIV positive just like it doesn't matter how somebody became an alcoholic, or got cancer but too often it's the gay community that judges positive folks worse than the straight community. everybody you sleep with you should treat as if they are positive every time. if you chose to bareback or use a codom that is between you and your partner but either way you should assume the other guy is positive even if they say they are negative.

[marylander1940]

Came across a listing that definitely caught my attention, but the ad is new so I did some digging.

 

One of the things I've done is to take a phone number from a listing and search for it on Facebook. Often it pops up a person's Facebook page and you can tell if the person in the ad is actually the person running the ad. It's not meant to invade their privacy - it's just doing a quick check to make sure the ad isn't from a fraud.

 

Anyway, I did a search for the number and it popped up a Facebook page that seemed to match his identity. So far, so good.

 

But then I discovered that the guy running the ad is also a writer and has written a handful of news articles (using his real name) about his experiences being HIV+.

 

So yeah, that's a bit disturbing, especially considering he also appears to be entering the porn world. And because he lists "Anything goes" on his RM profile.

 

Obviously we live in an era where being positive isn't what it was 30 years ago. And I have absolutely no problem with positive escorts existing, as long as they're up-front about their status. But I'm not sure what is up with this guy and I thought I'd point it out to the folks here.

 

Actions have consequences in life, the client and his buddies always have the chance to use a condom and protect themselves. I don't know how he got it but the fact that he offers unprotected sex to the clients who are dumb/naïve enough to trust hi makes me believe he doesn't really care.

 

did you expect common sense from a fella who allows bare back escort play?

 

not disclosing his status and knowingly bare backing is a felony in some places. don't reckon he is smart enough to know that or understand the consequence.

 

You don't seriously believe that he is the first poz escort who hasn't disclosed his status in this profile? I wouldn't expect it of someone. I would expect a straight answer if I asked him, but there's no guarantee that he will answer honestly. Which is why, if you're going to play in this sandbox, you need to keep your wits about you.

 

Well said gentlemen, right to the point as usual!

 

No escort (or anyone else) should be or is obligated to disclose his status to the world when posting a listing to spend time together, whether as an escort or a hook-up. I'd hope he'd do so one-on-one, which is why personal contact is important. If he doesn't mention his status, ask. It's your job to protect yourself.

 

And, there are so many ads, escort and non-escort, that don't mention status that it's a bit naive to assume that no mention = negative. Frankly, I no longer even ask. Truvada and a condom are enough for me (see last sentence above). YMMV.

 

And and, your question is a more-than-reasonable topic of discussion. I Google the hell out of phone numbers and pics on a new escort too. We need to protect ourselves from both ripoffs and danger. But, listing personally identifying identification of the escort's "stage name" was very poor form. It seems like you've realized that, so good for you. Take care of yourself.

 

Even if he calls himself negative, you must assume his poz and protect yourself.

[pjp1492]

I'm sorry but saying "I have positive friends" is like when people say "I have black friends". what exactly does that mean? actions speak more than words. you say you wouldn't point this out with ill intent, but then what was the whole point of your posting if not to accuse this gentleman of being positive like its a bad thing.

 

HIV status shouldn't just be a concern for many it should be a concern for all, BUT it is a personal issue between two concertina adults. if you had proof this gentleman was knowingly infecting others then by all means you should be raising the alarm , but your post accuses somebody of being HIV positive without any real evidence and in doing the post you are implying it is a bad thing to be poz.

 

yes the escort should be upfront but he doesn't have to advertise he is positive.

 

that said I want to give you props and a thank you for

a) taking down the link to his profile. I appreciate you doing that.

b) you did not disclose what you think his real name is.

and c) your apology. I am guessing from your response that you are sincere in your apology and you were a bit surprised by the response. we have all said or done things that didn't turn out how we intended so I cannot judge you harshly in this regard.

 

I am sorry if I have come across as too aggressive in my responses but after living with this for 25 years I am still frustrated with how the gay community judges people with HIV whether intentional or unintentional after all these years. it doesn't matter how somebody became HIV positive just like it doesn't matter how somebody became an alcoholic, or got cancer but too often it's the gay community that judges positive folks worse than the straight community. everybody you sleep with you should treat as if they are positive every time. if you chose to bareback or use a codom that is between you and your partner but either way you should assume the other guy is positive ebven if they say they are negative.

Understood on all counts. All the best to you and no hard feelings - at least from me. (I understand if the feeling is not mutual.)

[Brian Kevin]

I should really skip this threat, but here we go....

I think the point of this thread was not to contract HIV, I see both sides of the fence here, but at the same time, you should be disclosing your HIV status. IF YOU ARE A SEX WORKER, YOUR HIV STATUS MATTERS. Shun me if you want, but I'm sticking to what I just said. I am not scared to see a HIV+ or HIV- client BUT at the same time, I would like to know if you have HIV, just like I'd like to know if a client has:

>Sezuires

>Phorisis (so i can get the proper lotion for out sessions)

>Schizophrenia

>Bi-polar

>Blood Clots

>Heart Attacks

>Diabetes

Being HIV + weakens your immune system, in turn if I just got over a cold the chances of me passing it on to you are VERY HIGH. so NOW, I hope you all see when I say protect each other, you know what I mean.

 

as a college trained LMT both nationally and state certified, this list I created is a small list of contra-indications for massage; if something bad happens during our session, its my licenses that's on the line. YES, HIV has nothing to do with any of those things, but its just the point that matters. If you can kiss, suck and touch me then you should be disclosing your status to me.

IN turn, I would never let anything bad happen to myself, not saying HIV is a bad thing, however, I do take every proper step required to protect myself for HIV and STDS/STI's

 

ENDING POINT: If this thread was "I was infected by an escort" then I think everyone would be "who is it" "link their add" disagree if you want, but lets be realistic here as well.

Give respect to earn respect.

 

I hope you all can accept this long thread post. I feel confident in my writing that I have not burnt any bridges.

[stop]

Understood on all counts. All the best to you and no hard feelings - at least from me. (I understand if the feeling is not mutual.)

 

no hard feelings here towards you. as I said in my last post I appreciate your apology and I don't think you realized what the response to your post would be. again I appreciate the steps you took after the original post. it demonstrates to me what kind of man you are.

[+ Truereview]

Hey, PJP, I join Jeepo. just want to acknowledge again that although you f&cked up (we all do) in the eyes of this one forum member, you are putting in one helluva attempt at recovery. Learning requires adversity, intensity, and diversity...and you just got served with all of the above, and you are showing grace under pressure.

 

Not your proudest moment at the onset, but chin up.

[Brian Kevin]

Not your proudest moment at the onset, but chin up.

 

We could of left this part out, stop beating the man with a stick already. LOL Kissy face :*

[+ Truereview]

We could of left this part out, stop beating the man with a stick already. LOL Kissy face :*

Good point, Brian! Lol...see, I f&ck up regularly even when trying to be supportive!

 

Kissy face? You li'l flirt!

[Brian Kevin]

Good point, Brian! Lol...see, I f&ck up regularly even when trying to be supportive!

 

Kissy face? You li'l flirt!

 

Youre not fucking up you just being harsh :*