Sugar Daddy?

[Moneymike68]

Have any of you self proclaimed daddies ventured into being a sugar daddy? Does it include exclusivity with your favorite escort? Pros/Cons?

[Brian Kevin]

nice new avi

[bigvalboy]

I have, and no it didn't include exclusivity. http://www.boytoy.com/forums/public/style_emoticons/default/bye.gif

Edited October 28, 2015 by bigvalboy

[mike carey]

nice new avi

I like your new avatar as well, Brian, but you knew I thought is was good!

[jawjateck]

I've had 3 arrangements that lasted over a year and really enjoyed each of them. Exclusivity was not part of the deal. I crave diversity and will never limit myself to one man's company. There is no one man capable of satisfying every sensual or social desire I occasionally have.

[AdamSmith]

Does it include exclusivity with your favorite escort?

 

No.

Pros

 

You don't get sick of each other.

[BaronArtz]

I have. It was fun when it lasted and it inevitably came to an end. As most of these relationships do. Sugar daddy relationships don't really work because of the inherent conflict of interests. The 'son' always worries that the 'dad' can discard him at any time when somebody hotter shows up. The 'dad' worries that the 'son' is just staying in the relationship because of the money. Exclusivity issues can be problematic. Will 'dad' and 'son' live together, or separately? There will be real heart break when one party sees is as a quasi-marriage and the other party sees it as a short term arrangement. My advice: don't do it. Except if you both know/agree it is a short term thing. Or if you are really in love and are getting married.

Edited October 28, 2015 by BaronArtz

[+ SundayZip]

What does it mean to be a sugar daddy?

 

I assume that the sugar daddy gives his recipient financial assistance over and above payments for one-on-one date time. But what is it beyond that? What does the sugar daddy get in return? Is everything with your recipient then part of a package deal (e.g., no additional charges for that special one-on-one time)? Do you try to somehow keep the relationship in balance (i.e., equal benefit to both parties)? Or do you consider your financial assistance to have an altruistic component and you don't expect much in return.

 

Inquiring minds want to know....

[YoungAD]

I have. It was fun when it lasted and it inevitably came to an end. As most of these relationships do. Sugar daddy relationships don't really work because of the inherent conflict of interests. The 'son' always worries that the 'dad' can discard him at any time when somebody hotter shows up. The 'dad' worries that the 'son' is just staying in the relationship because of the money. Exclusivity issues can be problematic. Will 'dad' and 'son' live together, or separately? There will be real heart break when one party sees is as a quasi-marriage and the other party sees it as a short term arrangement. My advice: don't do it. Except if you both know/agree it is a short term thing. Or if you are really in love and getting married.

 

It all ended when Baron was expected to buy his escort dinner once.

[+ stevenkesslar]

My advice: don't do it. Except if you both know/agree it is a short term thing. Or if you are really in love and getting married.

 

Boy, it's nice to be able to agree with the Baron for a change.

 

I can't comment on "Sugar Daddy" per se, but I can comment on "Sugar Friend."

 

Another word that I don't like that hits the same idea is "polyamory."

 

Or arguably, another word that describes the same thing is dysfunction, but if so I have set up some pretty enduring dysfunctional relationships with clients.

 

I've had and have a number of clients that I've known for, in a number of cases, over a decade. The boundaries between "client" and "friend" and "on the clock" and "off the clock" are fluid in that all of them at one point or another have crossed the line, all in different ways. It sounds like self-serving bullshit, but I can say some of my best friends are clients, just like I know teachers and business people and other professionals who can say some of their best friends are colleagues. In some cases the paid relationship morphed into simply friendships, in other cases it endures as "paid" relatioships with dollars and strings attached, at least most of the time.

 

The "Sugar Daddy" model is tried and true throughout the ages and the downsides are the ones Baron points to. In particular, it is likely to have a relatively short shelf life. "Sugar Friend" is a different thing, and I think one main difference is that it allows both parties way more psychological (not to mention physical) space in the context of a sort of committed relationship, although the commitment is never formalized in any way. That's actually probably a good thing too, because the commitment to continue being "friends with benefits" is basically as good as the relationship itself, which I think is as it should be.

 

It also probably helps that I'm a bit over the hill and my clients are even more mature than I am. Yeah, it sucks to get older. But guess what? In youth and beauty, wisdom is rare.

Edited October 28, 2015 by stevenkesslar

[YoungAD]

Boy, it's nice to be able to agree with the Baron for a change.

 

I can't comment on "Sugar Daddy" per se, but I can comment on "Sugar Friend."

 

Another word that I don't like that hits the same idea is "polyamory."

 

Or arguably, another word that describes the same thing is dysfunction, but if so I have set up some pretty enduring dysfunctional relationships with clients.

 

I've had and have a number of clients that I've known for, in a number of cases, over a decade. The boundaries between "client" and "friend" and "on the clock" and "off the clock" are fluid in that all of them at one point or another have crossed the line, all in different ways. It sounds like self-serving bullshit, but I can say some of my best friends are clients, just like I know teachers and business people and other professionals who can say some of their best friends are colleagues. In some cases the paid relationship morphed into simply friendships, in other cases it endures as "paid" relatioships with dollars and strings attached, at least most of the time.

 

The "Sugar Daddy" model is tried and true throughout the ages and the downsides are the ones Baron points to. In particular, it is likely to have a relatively short shelf life. "Sugar Friend" is a different thing, and I think one main difference is that it allows both parties way more psychological (not to mention physical) space in the context of a sort of committed relationship, although the commitment is never formalized in any way. That's actually probably a good thing too, because the commitment to continue being "friends with benefits" is basically as good as the relationship itself, which I think is as it should be.

 

It also probably helps that I'm a bit over the hill and my clients are even more mature than I am. Yeah, it sucks to get older. But guess what? In youth and beauty, wisdom are rare.

 

I agree with Steven. I have been able to maintain friendships of varying degrees with a number of escorts. Other than a few minor snafus with scheduling or lack of chemistry, I have not had anything close to the number of problems some of the more prolific posters have experienced in the past and still seem to today.

[Tonyko]

I have a few older buds who've been S Daddies and oddly the relationships that worked out BEST were the ones where the Boy Baby was STRAIGHT (Sugar Boibaby 4Pay seems redundant ) Think because the arrangement with the older guy was his ONLY guy guy relationship he wasn't frustrated or hitting on younger dudes etc etc. His personal life was like a TOTS diff world that didn't infringe on his Daddy relationship. They just move on amicably when the boy gets married has kids etc (Got one bud who's boy was a Playgirl cover model he's NOW like 47 two grown girls one in College and but he MAINTAINED the relationship with my bud for YEARS until he and his fam moved away. They STILL see eachother occasionally have dinner etc and my bud says (in thanks for the $$$ of the early years) his former boi still lets him have a lil fun with him

[Brian Kevin]

I have, and no it doesn't include exclusivity. http://www.boytoy.com/forums/public/style_emoticons/default/bye.gif

 

I'm sorry it sounds like you had a rough time.

 

 

SIDE NOTE.

 

If someone came out of pocket for all expenses that individual had..... Shouldn't it be "exclusive" I mean, I do enjoy escorting, but the point of 'sugar daddy' to me is stability..

 

Why see a couple dozen clients a month when you could just see one??????????

 

Call me old fashioned I guess.

[bigvalboy]

I'm sorry it sounds like you had a rough time.

SIDE NOTE.

If someone came out of pocket for all expenses that individual had..... Shouldn't it be "exclusive" I mean, I do enjoy escorting, but the point of 'sugar daddy' to me is stability..

Why see a couple dozen clients a month when you could just see one??????????

Call me old fashioned I guess.

 

Not really a rough time. He was located overseas, so I knew the deal. I certainly didn't expect him to be exclusive to me when I wasn't there, but since I was picking up the tab, it is something that one tends to think about... more often than not.

Edited October 28, 2015 by bigvalboy

[BaronArtz]

OK. So can some describe the "Sugar Daddy" model?... at least what the model is for you. All replies to this post so far assume that we all know what's involved with a sugar daddy relationship. Although I think I understand the concept (sort of.. maybe), I don't really know how it works in a real life situation.

 

What's involved beyond the sugar daddy giving his recipient financial assistance. What does the sugar daddy get in return? Do you try to somehow keep the relationship in balance (i.e., equal benefit to both parties)? Do consider your financial assistance to have an altruistic component and you don't expect much in return?

 

There are various interpretations but here is how I have seen it. 'Dad' pays for most, if not all living expenses and some extras. The fees could be somewhat at the same level as the 'son' used to make by being an escort. In return, 'son' stops active escorting, takes down his escort ad and is socially available to 'dad'. In some cases, 'son' may move in with 'dad', but I think that is unusual. The benefit for 'son' is more stable income, from a guy that he presumably likes, without the hassle of having to schedule appointments with multiple clients all the time. The benefit for 'dad' is having a relationship with somebody he is attracted to, with some fringe benefits.

 

A variation on this is a situation where an escort stops active escorting, but keeps relationships with say 3-10 clients that he likes.

[+ SundayZip]

Thanks BaronArtz. I've been having a dialogue with a friend who has a fairly new relationship with a working boy. The boy made comments about looking for a sugar daddy and my friend has been trying to get his head wrapped around that. I suspect (hope) that my friend will read this.

[+ stevenkesslar]

OK. So can some describe the "Sugar Daddy" model?... at least what the model is for you.

 

There's probably as many different models as there are people. The better question is, what's your stereotype?

 

My stereotype is of a "kept man" who relies on one person for primary support, whether that's money, housing, food, helping them get through school or start a business, or some combination of the above.

 

"Kept" does not necessarily mean "exclusive" as opposed to "primary." It doesn't necessarily include sex, as opposed to companionship, but it probably does.

 

Those are my stereotypes, at least.

[Brian Kevin]

Not really a rough time. He was located overseas, so I knew the deal. I certainly didn't expect him to be exclusive to me when I wasn't there, but since I was picking up the tab, it is something that one tends to think about... more often than not.

 

You sound like such a fun and caring individual .

I hope you guys had a LOT of fun together :*

[BaronArtz]

Thanks BaronArtz. I've been having a dialogue with a friend who has a fairly new relationship with a working boy. The boy made comments about looking for a sugar daddy and my friend has been trying to get his head wrapped around that. I suspect (hope) that my friend will read this.

 

You are very welcome. What your friend should NOT do, is register at or pay fees to the following website: https://www.sugardaddyforme.com

 

That website is purely a marketing scheme, with most ads either fictitious or entirely outdated. It is a scam.

[bigvalboy]

 

Sugar.......Daddy

[MiamiLooker]

 

Sugar.......Daddy

Hefner s quite short in person...

[Moneymike68]

Great responses guys! Being a sugar daddy is a bit more complicated than I originally thought... I think I'll stick to being a well tipping client for now.

[jawjateck]

What does it mean to be a sugar daddy?

 

My arrangements were college boys with a built in ending. They would graduate (hopefully), move on with life, possibly re-locate, enter the work force, etc. I provided a set monthly stipend for a certain number of days/nights per month. No exclusivity. Two of them posted ads and were hired by other clients; they gave me scheduling priority. The other collegian saw no other clients (as far as I know); he was satisfied with the stipend.

 

These arrangements worked well because of the character of the young men, which I vetted through several meetings/hiring situations before terms were offered and accepted. All three of them went way beyond the minimum requirements in terms of satisfaction, scheduling, and number of meetings. Each ended amicably. They moved on to professional careers, and my interaction/communication with them ended.

 

It's a privilege to help aspirational young men.

[+ deej]

It's a privilege to help aspirational young men.

 

I do like a nice aspiration.

[curiousnomore]

No I haven't, for one reason. My wife has destroyed my interest in any defined relationship.