"Off Duty" Escort Hookups

[+ dutchmuch]

Yikes, that's coming off a bit harsh don't you think? One of them had already expressed an interest in hanging out with him (the night before) and happily did so (even though it didn't wind up between the sheets). Have no escorts EVER ended up becoming friends with a client and had things progress to non-paying relations?

 

 

Have any mechanics become friends with their clients, and wind-up working on their clients cars for free?

[Guest Starbuck]

On Friday night, two guys who work as escorts (one of whom had previously seen corndog as a client) hang out with corndog for hours. He graciously pays for their drinks. No sex occurs. They do not attempt to charge corndog for their TIME.

 

On Saturday night, two guys who work as escorts (one of whom met corndog socially the night before) hang out with corndog for hours. He graciously pays for their drinks. Although no hiring arrangement occurred, sex occurs. And an attempt is made to charge corndog for the SEX.

 

Isn't this "Ask An Escort " section of the Forum the one in which we are most often reminded that escorts are paid for TIME ONLY? Anyone thinking corndog owes MORE than $400 for all that TIME?

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

Have any mechanics become friends with their clients, and wind-up working on their clients cars for free?

 

You're comparing apples to oranges here. A mechanic doesn't perform a service that is extremely intimate in nature from the get-go, whereas many escorts do.

 

And yes, as someone who has worked in the corporate world as well as escorting—I have provided free services to former clients (I believe Amoco posted something similar once in a thread), without any direct expectation of compensation. It was done both as a gesture of goodwill and networking, as much as "Let me do that, because you are in over your head and it will take you two weeks where I can be done in five minutes."

[bigvalboy]

...and not to labor the point, but being clear about what you expect or want to occur is a good thing, and I realize that corndog attempted that, but somewhere in the evening, alcohol changed any understanding that had been talked about, and they took advantage of him.

 

Don't forget, they didn't attempt to see corndog till after midnight. If they were really interested in corndogs company, they would most likely not have waited until after midnight to meet with him, at which point he was clearly thinking with the little head.

[MiamiLooker]

Isn't this "Ask An Escort " section of the Forum the one in which we are most often reminded that escorts are paid for TIME ONLY?

Do you believe everything you read here? Do you believe that all escorts are paid only for their time?

[ZhenXBear]

I'm even somewhat reluctant to ask an escort to dinner because of being so uncomfortable about making sure that the dinner is happening at $250 an hour too.

 

If you enjoy the warm up of dinner/lunch and conversation, you really should go for it in your communication. Nothing's more enjoyable than meeting someone for the first time in that type of relaxing setting. From my both my observation and very limited experience, it makes the transition into the remainder of your time very natural. Who knows you might even find that talking to them and seeing how special they are as an individual (something that's very important to me, personally) makes everything else that transpires, better!

 

Based on questions I've asked in the forum, and responses I've gotten, some escorts enjoy it as well. I've observed that depending on the guy the dinner/lunch might be agreeable enough to them where you can arrive at a pleasing financial compromise.

 

As for myself, well let's just say Mr. P. Hung's lunch conversation, smile and nice eyes were so delightful I considered it a dessert

[Guest Starbuck]

Do you believe everything you read here? Do you believe that all escorts are paid only for their time?

 

Sorry ... was the sarcasm unclear?

[Guest Starbuck]

... they took advantage of him.

 

Indeed they did. Bottom line. $400 just to make the drama go away? Not from me.

[MiamiLooker]

Thanks for your thoughtful response, ZhenXBear. To answer some of your questions...

 

 

Well yeah sure .. If u wanna have sex its cool too. Whatever u like

To me, that sounds almost like an offer to have sex for free.

 

The key word here is "almost". This indicates to me that there was a good probability this wasn't an offer for sex for free.

[MiamiLooker]

Sorry ... was the sarcasm unclear?

I got it now:oops:

[corndog]

Wow guys! I really appreciate all of your thoughts on this, even the ones that I disagree with. From the comments here, I feel even more strongly that this situation was nuanced, and not black-and-white.

 

With all due respect, but if corndog was inebriated, he may not remember everything that was said, discussed, possibly agreed to - implicitly and explicitly.

 

I've been in touch with Guy#1 (who I'd like to see again) and Guy#2 (who I'd like to patch things up with). They haven't asserted that I agreed to pay, only that "I should have known." There are certainly many levels of possible inebriation, and I'll admit that my inhibitions were lowered and my self confidence raised, but I have a complete picture of what transpired, and there was no discussion of hiring. Forgive me if I exaggerated my level of intoxication. I would characterize it as "tipsy but in control."

 

somewhere in the evening, alcohol changed any understanding that had been talked about, and they took advantage of him.

 

Please allow me to correct this and state that they tried to take advantage of me. I didn't pay them the $400 that they requested, I generously gave them $100 for "cab fare." In the end, I think it was them who lost out.

 

Again, thanks to everyone for the comments. Making this post and reading the comments have been enormously helpful as I've been processing the experience in my head.

[+ poolboy48220]

Have any mechanics become friends with their clients, and wind-up working on their clients cars for free?

I have. He doesn't do major work for free, but there are times where he's done an oil change for free (well, just materials, no labor) while we're hanging around the shop after hours. Or fixed something really simple and just waved me off when I tried to pay. This is a guy who I first met as a mechanic, a friend of a friend (who I now consider a friend), we didn't know each other before he started working on my car.

[Phil_musc]

Not an escort here, but most replies in this thread aren't by escorts either (I think) but to me Dutchmuch and Miamilooker have the best points - there was no developing "friendship" here; and the key word in the sentence was the word "almost."

{The key word here is "almost". This indicates to me that there was a good probability this wasn't an offer for sex for free.}.

[corndog]

Why else would "2 smoking hot escorts" want to spend an evening with you, culminating in a sexual tryst?

 

I've tried to just let this comment go, but I feel like I need to respond to it...

 

Of course two smoking hot guys would want to spend and evening with me. I'm a really nice guy, I'm respectful, I'm a lot of fun to hang out with, I'm an interesting conversationalist (and, I'm buying drinks). In short, I'm worthy.

 

I don't know you dutchmutch, or bigvalboy, or miamilooker, but I bet you're worthy, too. We're all here because we share a common interest in professional escorts, and this interest tends to focus on the superficial physical qualities of the male body, but lets not sell ourselves short. Although it's probably true that none of us have what it takes to be a pin-up model, we can still be attractive, interesting people, even in a sexual way. When we look in the mirror, perhaps we don't see our own ideas of sexually attractive, but it's a big, diverse world. Allow the possibility that attraction works differently for other people, and consider that your knowledge, experience, wisdom or inner beauty may be a turn-on to someone else.

 

Consider what it would be like to be in perfect physical condition, with natural beauty and universal good looks. Perhaps everyone would want you, but only for your superficial qualities. Would anyone really take the time to get to know who you really are? If you were this guy, isn't it possible that you'd get tired of the revolving door of superficial hookups, or clients that treat you like a product, and develop an attraction for something deeper, something beyond physical appearance?

 

OK, I know, that's a bit of a fairy tale. And, I'm not saying that these guys were into me in that way. What I'm trying to say is that it's possible. To assume that attractive people would have no reason to be with you is just giving in to self-hate. Don't do it. You're worthy, and I'm worthy, too.

[marylander1940]

There was no contract. You owe them nothing, especially after sending that earlier text.

 

On the other hand, $400 for a couple of hours with two escorts in Montreal is not a bad rate.

 

yes, it's a good deal even in Canada but they should have told him in advance that one thing is "hanging out having the client pay for drinks at a bar" and other thing is going to the hotel with the client to have sex with him.

 

here in Thai restaurants when I ask for brown rice, they just tell me it's $1 more...

[+ poolboy48220]

I've tried to just let this comment go, but I feel like I need to respond to it...

 

Of course two smoking hot guys would want to spend and evening with me. I'm a really nice guy, I'm respectful, I'm a lot of fun to hang out with, I'm an interesting conversationalist (and, I'm buying drinks). In short, I'm worthy.

 

I don't know you dutchmutch, or bigvalboy, or miamilooker, but I bet you're worthy, too. We're all here because we share a common interest in professional escorts, and this interest tends to focus on the superficial physical qualities of the male body, but lets not sell ourselves short. Although it's probably true that none of us have what it takes to be a pin-up model, we can still be attractive, interesting people, even in a sexual way. When we look in the mirror, perhaps we don't see our own ideas of sexually attractive, but it's a big, diverse world. Allow the possibility that attraction works differently for other people, and consider that your knowledge, experience, wisdom or inner beauty may be a turn-on to someone else.

 

Consider what it would be like to be in perfect physical condition, with natural beauty and universal good looks. Perhaps everyone would want you, but only for your superficial qualities. Would anyone really take the time to get to know who you really are? If you were this guy, isn't it possible that you'd get tired of the revolving door of superficial hookups, or clients that treat you like a product, and develop an attraction for something deeper, something beyond physical appearance?

 

OK, I know, that's a bit of a fairy tale. And, I'm not saying that these guys were into me in that way. What I'm trying to say is that it's possible. To assume that attractive people would have no reason to be with you is just giving in to self-hate. Don't do it. You're worthy, and I'm worthy, too.

I've had those moments where guys give me the come-hither look, and my instinct is to turn around to see who they're really looking at. It's not an everyday thing, but it happens.

[marylander1940]

...

 

I would be very uncomfortable asking those questions in the moment. They feel insulting and degrading and would undermine the feeling of friendship that was (or appeared to be) developing. I think that is why I posed the question in the earlier text message; I wanted to clarify the situation and avoid having to deal with it later.

I believe that we all tend to ask ourselves questions like this, and I think it is incredibly unhealthy to do so. We all have insecurities and self-doubt, but we should not give in to it. The group of us had been having a lot of fun, laughing and carrying on, and I choose to find it very plausible that our connection lead to some sexual attraction...

 

 

I'm 74... I can't relate to that but some escorts seem to enjoy being with me.

 

I have a couple of questions for you:

 

How old are you?

 

How old are escorts 1 (the one you hired for sex), escort 2 (drinking buddy) and escort 3 (the one that was included in the 3some with escort 1 and you)?

 

I hope I didn't get all of this mixed up... damn dyslexia if I did LOL.

[corndog]

How old are you? How old are escorts 1 (the one you hired for sex), escort 2 (drinking buddy) and escort 3 (the one that was included in the 3some with escort 1 and you)?

 

I'm in my mid-forties. The escorts were young enough to be my children... 22-26, I believe.

 

And, yes, you got it a little mixed up:

Guy#1 - The one hired (technically, for a massage) on Thursday

Guy#2 - His friend, who hung out for drinks with Guy#1 and me all night on Friday

Guy#3 - Guy#2's boyfriend, who came along on Saturday night and had the 3-way with Guy#2 and I

 

Sorry for the confusion.

[bigvalboy]

Please allow me to correct this and state that they tried to take advantage of me. I didn't pay them the $400 that they requested, I generously gave them $100 for "cab fare." In the end, I think it was them who lost out..

 

I stand corrected...you are absolutely right. I'm glad you stood your ground and only gave them the 100, plus you got a little "nookie" out of this, and that's never a bad thing. I got scammed in Montreal on more than one occasion. Montreal is no different than any place else, you have to always be on your guard. It's good to know that you are safe.

[marylander1940]

I'm in my mid-forties. The escorts were young enough to be my children... 22-26, I believe.

 

And, yes, you got it a little mixed up:

Guy#1 - The one hired (technically, for a massage) on Thursday

Guy#2 - His friend, who hung out for drinks with Guy#1 and me all night on Friday

Guy#3 - Guy#2's boyfriend, who came along on Saturday night and had the 3-way with Guy#2 and I

 

Sorry for the confusion.

 

I confused "I" with "1", damn... dyslexia.

 

So the 3some happened with number 2 and number 3 (number 2's boyfriend) and not with number 1 (the only who got paid to have sex/massage with you). Got it.

 

I'm 74... I can't relate to that but some escorts seem to enjoy being with me.

 

I have a couple of questions for you:

 

How old are you?

 

How old are escorts 1 (the one you hired for sex), escort 2 (drinking buddy) and escort 3 (the one that was included in the 3some with escort 1 and you)?

 

I hope I didn't get all of this mixed up... damn dyslexia if I did LOL.

 

I still believe they should have told you one thing was drinks other thing was fucking...

 

I'm glad at least they got 100, hopefully they'll learn the lesson not to mix business with friendship.

 

Do you think alcohol made them forget to tell you their fee?

 

Did they pay any drinks or you paid for all of the alcohol?

[+ Gar1eth]

I was thinking that exact same thing but you beat me to the comment. I'm even somewhat reluctant to ask an escort to dinner because of being so uncomfortable about making sure that the dinner is happening at $250 an hour too.

 

I'll bet you meant to say '...about making sure that the dinner WASN'T happening at $250 an hour. '

 

It's really not too difficult. I mean I understand. I think the 1st time I asked about that I was a tad nervous. But I got over it. Now I only ask if I had a good time and the guy seems like a nice guy. I think what I normally say is something along the lines of

 

"I'm going to get something to eat. If you are hungry and interested, I'd like to take you out if it's not on the clock. "

 

Only a few have taken me up on it.

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

But I don't think they saw you as a friend. So really there is nothing to repair. In general friends don't charge their friends for sex. So if they charged you, they think of you as a client and not a friend.

 

Gman

 

I was re-reading my Reply above Corndog. On second reading, it sounds more harsh than I usually like to be. I apologize for that. I do think from the way you described things that you were in the right.

 

Gman

[MiamiLooker]

I don't know you dutchmutch, or bigvalboy, or miamilooker, but I bet you're worthy, too.

 

I don’t base my self-worth on whether or not someone I just met while out drinking at a bar and who’s young enough to be my son (or, even grandson) wants to hang out and/or have sex with me. Having said that, I might have handled the situation much the same as you did except for one thing: I wouldn’t have posted about it here, and especially, with an expectation that all the responses would be in agreement with what I did.

[ZhenXBear]

I'm in my mid-forties. The escorts were young enough to be my children... 22-26, I believe.

 

And, yes, you got it a little mixed up:

Guy#1 - The one hired (technically, for a massage) on Thursday

Guy#2 - His friend, who hung out for drinks with Guy#1 and me all night on Friday

Guy#3 - Guy#2's boyfriend, who came along on Saturday night and had the 3-way with Guy#2 and I

 

Sorry for the confusion.

 

Glad for the clarification! For some reason as we started this snowball downhill I thought there were just two guys involved. It makes more sense now since your "original hire" wasn't involved in the tryst. It was generous of you to afford this level of hospitality to all 3 men involved. I do hope that Guy#1 asked you politely if you had an interest in meeting guy#2? Or guy#2 didn't assume you'd be buying his drinks (I can understand why you'd want to buy guy#1 drinks).

 

I was about ready to ask the old "Whose on first?" question...just to get this sorted out in my mind. Haven't even started to wrap my brain around who the catcher or pitcher was in this wacky baseball game (Sorry, couldn't resist the pun.) :p

[sincitymix]

But the interest in hanging out...was that genuine, or was it because corndog was footing the bill? The first red flag should have been, after corndog invited him out and offered to buy drinks, he called and asked to bring a friend. A that point they were taking advantage of him. I get it, they were hot, and 400 dollars is not a lot of money, corndog had fun, but when there weren't boundaries set, they took advantage of his good nature and intoxicated state.

 

400dollars IS a lot of money:P