DC Leather Weekend

[+ SundayZip]

I’ll be in DC this weekend attending the luncheon and related activities. Thinking that I’d have plenty of extra time between activities for forum members, I also registered for MAL. So, what the heck does one do at MAL? Or maybe a better question is, how much time should I plan to spend at MAL?

 

There’s an online itinerary that, to me, is a bit mysterious (although Dave’s Schedule for Weekend Events posting helps a lot). I’ve never been into the leather scene and don’t own a single article of leather clothing -- don’t even own a denim jacket! But I’m intrigued anyhow. I’ll check out the vendor exhibition, voyeur heaven and wander about, but doubt I’m ready for puppy play, fisting or anything too advanced (maybe next time).

[Guest ChrisW]

From what I observed last year there are more people per capita involved in some sort of power dynamic (puppies, subs, slaves, boys, daddies, Sirs, handlers, masters, alphas and the list goes on) than any other event I have been to in the US. If your not a kinkcter or just dipping your foot in this event can be a bit much but its a lot of fun to watch. Its like watching a giant social experiment of gay male sexuality, you will see things that get your dick hard and titillate your imagination as well as things that will probably leave you scratching your head wondering what you just saw.

 

I love leather/kink events as I have lots of friends within that community but it can be a bit over whelming to be around that many sexually charged gay men all at once. Last year at any given point you could walk into the hotel and FEEL the testosterone in the air. As for what one does at MAL here is my break down of a day

 

Get up grab breakfast and if your in the mood to gawk at hot men have breakfast at the hotel restaurant

 

The vender mart opens in the morning so people generally go there after breakfast to pick up what ever kink accoutrement you might need for the day or evening. Its also a great cruising ground as well as a good place to meet folks. "Well don't you look strapping in that harness? Want to go back to my room?

 

Grab some lunch

 

Explore DC the museums are amazing or just have hot sex all day long.

 

Grab Dinner. The Daddy's dinner sounds like a lot of fun to me so I would recommend that.

 

Come back to the hotel and slip into as little as possible, I recommend a jockstrap and a smile. Heading to the lobby in full kink attire or jeans and a t shirt will work as well. Socialize for a few hours and maybe find someone to keep you occupied for the night.

 

As the night goes on the lobby will thin out and people will start roaming the top floors of the hotel for sex which can be a lot of fun. There is also an orgy that goes on some where on the 9th floor every night but I have no idea how good it will be.

 

If your hotel room faces inward you can watch people go at it all night and all day.

 

And last but not least, go to bed at a reasonable hour so you aren't to tired for the luncheon!

 

 

Just a warning there are a lot of VERY experienced kinksters at this event which can be both a good thing and a bad thing. If your going to play with them let them know your experience level as well as your limits before hand and don't be afraid to say I am not comfortable with this and I think I should go. Your physical safety is just as important as your emotional.

 

If anyone has any questions please feel free to pm me.

 

ALSO one last thing and I can't emphasize this enough, people will be doing drugs this weekend. If your not comfortable with what ever drugs someone is doing leave immediately. If you see anyone doing T get the hell out.

 

Have fun and be safe!

[Guest ChrisW]

ALSO if you flag a color make sure its what your intending to flag. Don't wear a lot of red or yellow unless thats what your looking for. I had a friend last year who flagged yellow but didn't realize what it stood for until someone peed in his mouth.

 

https://user.xmission.com/~trevin/hanky.html

 

or if you want a laugh

 

[namchebaz]

Haha, SundayZip -- I'm planning to be in DC for the weekend as well. it was Originally, because I have plans to see an escort Sat nite. Then late last week, I was talked into attending the luncheon on Sunday (which I'm looking forward to). And now, I've decided to register for MAL, although the only leather I own is my belt, wallet, and cole haans! But I think I'm going to do exactly what Chris W suggested to you. If nothing else, it will be the hottest sociology experiment I've ever participated in...and I might learn something too. I'm glad to know I'm not the only man on the forum without any leather. Yet.

Enjoy!

[+ SundayZip]

Wow! Thanks ChisW. Great information! you are my hero du jour.

[+ SundayZip]

ALSO if you flag a color make sure its what your intending to flag. Don't wear a lot of red or yellow unless thats what your looking for. I had a friend last year who flagged yellow but didn't realize what it stood for until someone peed in his mouth.

 

https://user.xmission.com/~trevin/hanky.html

 

Nice... I just downloaded the color grid to my phone. I've always wanted to flag a color. Can't wait! Now the trick is to find a hanky that matches my colors.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

So if I show up at MAL without a hanky, is that saying anything or than "first-timer?"

[+ deej]

So if I show up at MAL without a hanky, is that saying anything or than "first-timer?"

 

It says you're friendly enough to hang out.

 

One of the hallmarks of the leather community has always been that they accept anyone that comes with a smile on their face and leaves judgement at the door.

 

I've always admired that.

[whipped guy]

Interestingly I have really never seen anyone get overly involved with the hanky thing... Yes, there is a code... but other than black and yellow... it's all so complicated... Hence the comedy skit that ChrisW posted above. However, they do sell some of the colors at the Leatherman in NYC... Though I doubt that they are a best sellers.

 

Now I have never been to MAL, but I have been to Leather bars, clubs, and events. The big thing are actually leather arms bands... With the left/right meaning dom/sub. Still, many guys like myself prefer to wear a band on each arm... Now that can theoretically mean switch... However, in most cases it simply means that the wearer thinks that it looks hot. I have a variety of different styles including a pair that matches my harness. However, I usually wear the harness only for show as I find it a hinderace when playing the dom as it restricts movement... Likewise when being a sub it tends to get in the way. Consequently my preference is to wear a pair of armbands as well as a pair of wristbands when being an active player. It is a nice compromise between appearance and practicality. Of course if I'm in a situation where I want not to be thought of as a sub by any stretch of the imagination a single band is definitely worn on my left arm!

 

In summary, the left vs. right thing mostly refers to armbands... and it can help break the ice if one sees a player overtly advertising as a sub or dom. Still, I have a very good buddy who was perplexed that he was not seeing the action that he desired... Until he realized that he was wearing his lone armband on the wrong arm and thus was signaling the exact opposite of what he was seeking! His solution was to buy a matching armband and wear two as it looked cool and he could not make a mistake.

 

Bottom line: Just do what you want and just go with the flow!!! Nothing will identify you as a first timer... Anything goes!!

[+ quoththeraven]

It says you're friendly enough to hang out.

 

One of the hallmarks of the leather community has always been that they accept anyone that comes with a smile on their face and leaves judgement at the door.

 

I've always admired that.

 

Deej -- Does that include women or does that stop at men? (And I'm aware there's a lesbian leather community in DC based out of the Eagle that will also be present at MAL).

 

ChrisW -- There's more kink/leather at MAL than at IML? Interesting.

[+ deej]

Deej -- Does that include women or does that stop at men?

 

Honey, an honest smile always wins.

[Dave]

 

ChrisW -- There's more kink/leather at MAL than at IML? Interesting.

 

well I'm not ChrisW but IMO yes, there's more kink at MAL than at IML.

 

btw - ChrisW, great description of a typical day!

 

my hotel room faces inward...

[+ quoththeraven]

Honey, an honest smile always wins.

 

Good to know. Thanks, deej.

 

And thanks, Dave, for your input. I am a little baffled by this, and as usual my brain is frantically scrambling for an explanation of this phenomenon, but I appreciate the confirmation.

[Guest ChrisW]

Deej -- Does that include women or does that stop at men? (And I'm aware there's a lesbian leather community in DC based out of the Eagle that will also be present at MAL).

 

ChrisW -- There's more kink/leather at MAL than at IML? Interesting.

 

There is always a contingent of queer leather women at these events and I think its great, I would say its some where between 5-10%.

 

As for IML vs MAL I have been to both and while I prefer IML because its bigger and Chicago is one of my favorite cities, MAL is a great event but can be a bit much for newbies to the kink/leather scene. IML has become more of a circuit party over the years which is fun in its own right but is very different than MAL. Folks that show up to this event are typically more experienced and live the lifestyle. Remember that just like the luncheon is a safe space for escorts and clients to interact with each other MAL is a safe space for kinksters to be themselves. Many people that attend these events don't get to be there authentic kinky selves to often so they really enjoy what limited time they have to occupy what ever head space gets them off.

 

Remember to be respectful while at these events, if you take pictures make sure to ask for permission. If you want to pet a puppy ask if its okay just like you would a normal dog (you can ask the puppy or their handler if they are present). Don't touch someones collar without permission, its a sign of love and affection as well as a power dynamic (think of it like touching someones wedding ring). Last but not least don't pull a puppies tail.

 

You will see people wearing arm bands as Whipped Guy said, Rubio Leather sells great wrist bands as well as wrist wallets but I am not sure if they will be at MAL. I am pretty sure the MR S booth should have bands should you want to wear them though I don't think the quality is as good. People do flag with hankies at these events and it can get you laid but make sure you know what your getting yourself into. If you have a red hanky in your left pocket and someone tries to pick you up be aware that you may feel a little loose the next day.

 

If you see me out and about during the weekend and have any questions please feel free to come up and say hi.

 

No matter how many of these events I go to I still get over whelmed, remember that its okay to take a break and hide out in your hotel room. Last IML I had to go hide in my hotel room and watch netflix to decompress at least once a day because there was so much stimulus.

 

If you are in recovery there are meetings at least twice a day, one at 10am and 10pm. If you feel like you might fall off the wagon there is no shame in it and get yourself into a meeting.

 

Remember to have lots of fun, make friends, and be safe!

[Guest ChrisW]

well I'm not ChrisW but IMO yes, there's more kink at MAL than at IML.

 

btw - ChrisW, great description of a typical day!

 

my hotel room faces inward...

Oh I remember your hotel room from last year ;-)

[Steven_Draker]

So if I show up at MAL without a hanky, is that saying anything or than "first-timer?"

 

The handkerchief code is sooo 1970's.

 

Today, colors are implemented in the accouterment e.g. in wristbands, armbands, color bands on pants, shirts, vests, chaps ... you name it.

 

 

You need to learn what blue, red, yellow, grey, white stands for.

 

Finally, as a first-timer, there's no need to be something at MAL that you're not. Just be yourself, go with an open mind and see what is it like, look around and enjoy yourself.

[Bart]

Last year I had the pleasure of Chris W being my tour guide at MAL which was my first time at any leather event. He explained things to me and of course remind its not polite to stare or leave my mouth hang open. I purchased my first leather item a harness which Chris helped me buy and it is something nice for a guy to grab on to while fucking me. I thought the whole thing was wonderful that this year I am actually staying at the hotel with a few friends. I would agree everyone was very friendly and if you had a question they were always polite to answer it I am sure I will buy something at the event. I don't know that I have the courage to walk around in just a jock strap and harness but who knows.

[+ ArVaGuy]

I agree with ChrisW that MAL can get a bit intense and taking an opportunity to site see is not a bad idea. Though I don't recommend visiting the National Gallery in full harness and chaps. If anyone needs suggestions just let me know.

 

Some things to keep in mind for newbies. The elevators will be packed and it can take a while to get to your room if staying at the Hyatt. The hallways get active at night (all day really) with people going room to room for...well you know. :o One message board has nearly 100 posts advertising availability for...well you know. Becareful, I hate to say this but condoms may be the exception rather than the rule.

 

And one last thing, please tip your maid for cleaning your room everyday. Figure two dollars a day at least. I always tip the maids leaving the cash on the bed. Often they leave me thank you notes. And on an extended stay my clothes get folded, papers organized, and all kinds of nice gestures. God only knows what those maids must find when this group checks out on Monday. So if you put the Do Not Disturb sign out and host a parade of gentlemen callers really trashing the room, then leave them ten bucks a day at the end.

 

I will be staying downtown but not at the Hyatt. Figuring I'll need some down time as well as peace and quiet. Plus I have a business relationship with the hotel and don't want to run into the sales manager or MOD.

[whipped guy]

One additional note: As Chris implied, if you see a scene in progress and you feel the impluse to jump into the action definitely be respectful of the parties involved. Some guys have very complicated master/slave relationships and one must be careful not to overstep one's bounds.

 

I recall one instance where I asked to be part of a scene where the sub was being spanked and paddled. However, I could only spank the sub with my bare hands. A paddle or leather toy was strictly reserved for the master. On another occasion the master would only deal with one sub at a time. If a flogger touched his sub's body he refused to use it on another person. I had hoped to experience a flogging since the person had won a Master of the Year contest. The flogger had to rest or some such thing... The guy was definitely more than a bit eccentric...

 

So there are definitely rituals involved with some leather guys. Yet at times the more the merrier. So tread lightly and be sure to respect a sub's limits if you are a dom... and if you are a sub be sure to express your limits and concerns as well as your interests. A bit of communication can make all the difference and hopefully result in a successful hookup. After all it's all about having some fun... and playing safely!

 

So as Steven says... Just be yourself. If you simply want to be a voyeur that's fine. That's what I did my first time I visited such a gathering so as to see how it's done. Also, some guys will indeed be walking around wearing only a harness and jockstrap. Others will be fully clothed... As long as you don't come wearing a black tie and tux you'll fit in... but then again there may be a sub who craves serving a master in formal wear... So who knows?!?!

[wisconsinguy]

I experienced IML last year as a relative newbie. I also was fortunate to have to an escort who was more than knowledgeable in leather, IML, and many other side events. Had a fantastic time. I also don't own a piece of leather, but that didn't stop we from have a great time. As others have said, be yourself, enjoy the moment, and be yourself. Made reservations for IML this year, can't wait.

[Dave]

I've just posted something about forum members meeting up for a casual drink on friday night

 

please see my recent post in the Lounge entitled "BAR MEET UP IN DC / FRIDAY JAN 16 - for Forum Readers"

 

Dave

[Guest ChrisW]

I don't know about you guys but I am beaming with excitement! See you guys tomorrow and travel safely!

[JDXXX]

Hey Chris,

 

I finally made it into town. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow as well babe. Where are you staying? Hyatt?

[Guest ChrisW]

The bf and I are staying at the Hyatt and look forward to meeting the whole daddies crew. I hope you had a good flight JD.

[JDXXX]

Thanks Chris. I sure did thanks. Im at the Grand Hyatt. Be sure to keep in touch babe. Looking forward to meeting you soon.

JD