Creating A Need, Then Filling It

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

A company in Valhalla, New York has released a product called Sphincterine Ass-trigent, to help "make you ass 'kissing' sweet'" and which includes "natural ingredients to soothe, stimulate, cleanse and refresh."

 

Available in both bottles http://www.getluckytiger.com/Merchant4/graphics/00000001/Spinch%20bottleFinal.jpg as well as minty fresh towelettes http://www.getluckytiger.com/Merchant4/graphics/00000001/wipe%20shot%202_small.jpg

 

http://www.mintyass.com/

[VaHawk]

Did you search the threads? Wasn't this product discussed here before?

[+ deej]

I think the towlettes are new. ;-)

[+ Lucky]

This is Sphincterine's third life here in Hooville, but it is comforting to know that Franco is concerned for our needs!

[guptasa1]

So did anyone actually ever try the stuff out? LOL.

[Trixie]

I'm buying a whole case!! It seems like the perfect stocking-stuffer!

Trix

[+ Axiom2001]

Months ago I purchased two bottles of this solution; today they rest inside of my bathroom cabinet; I have not used it. Maybe I'll experiment with it during the impending new year!!:9

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

For Your Ass Only

 

>comforting to know

 

For your ass only makes sound waves through the night

For your ass only air freshener is a fright

I can smell so much in you so much in you that's new

I burned my nose trying to kiss you

For your ass only makes sound waves through the night

For your ass only air freshener is a fright

I can smell so much in you so much in you that's new

I burned my nose trying to kiss you

 

For your ass only, only for you

For your ass only the farts are never cold

Maybe I'm a T.P. roll because I know you're mine

But you won't need to tear along the perforated lines

 

You've smelled what others can only dream,

and now I'm starting to release

For your ass only, only for you

The gases that collide in me,

Only for you, for your ass only

[theDCeBOY]

you all aren't REALLY going to let Mr. "WHY-DIDN'T-YOU-SEARCH-THE-ARCHIVES?!?!?!" get away with this one, are you?

[theDCeBOY]

they were there before as well.

[AdamSmith]

RE: For Your Ass Only

 

"The Geography of the House"

 

Seated after breakfast

In this white-tiled cabin

Arabs call the house where

Everybody goes,

Even melancholics

Raise a cheer to Mrs.

Nature for the primal

Pleasures She bestows.

 

Sex is but a dream to

Seventy-and-over,

But a joy proposed un-

til we start to shave:

Mouth-delight depends on

Virtue in the cook, but

This She guarantees from

Cradle unto grave.

 

Lifted off the potty,

Infants from their mothers

Hear their first impartial

Words of worldly praise:

Hence, to start the morning

With a satisfactory

Dump is a good omen

All our adult days.

 

Revelation came to

Luther in a privy

(Crosswords have been solved there),

Rodin was no fool

When he cast his Thinker,

Cogitating deeply,

Crouched in the position

Of a man at stool.

 

All the Arts derive from

This ur-act of making,

Private to the artist:

Makers’ lives are spent

Striving in their chosen

Medium to produce a

De-narciss-ized en-

during excrement.

 

Freud did not invent the

Constipated miser:

Banks have letter boxes

Built in their facade

Marked For Night Deposits,

Stocks are firm or liquid,

Currencies of nations

Either soft or hard.

 

Global Mother, keep our

Bowels of compassion

Open through our lifetime,

Purge our minds as well:

Grant us a kind ending,

Not a second childhood

Petulant, weak-sphinctered,

In a cheap hotel…

 

Mind and Body run on

Different timetables:

Not until our morning

Visit here can we

Leave the dead concerns of

Yesterday behind us,

Face with all our courage

What is now to be.

 

-- W.H. Auden