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bad form to offer to pay partial amount for short session?


jakeleyman
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I was in New Orleans for business and hired a guy to hang out in the French Quarter with me (a fetish of mine) with the possibility of returning to my hotel. After 10 minutes I did not think we were compatible and I offered to pay him for part of his time and call it quits. I will descibe the scenario but Im less interested in getting feedback on whether I was justified, than understanding whether the concept is defensible in general - of realizing incompatibility quickly and paying for partial time and expenses, but not full fee. Is that totally unfair to a guy who has possibly turned down other work, traveled, and gone to the trouble of showing up? Or is it fair?

 

Here was my situation: the first thing the escort said to me outside my hotel where we met at 11 pm, was "I'm hungry." I had told him I would cover drinks and food during our night out in the Quarter so he was not being unreasonable to ask for some food, but I guess it was the way and when it was said which kind of threw me. I thought of a famous late night place called Verti Mart and I suggested we go there. It was about 7 blocks walk and away from the more touristy parts of the quarter. After a few blocks he began to complain about the distance, the walking, the heat and began to list everything he did not eat - no meat, no bread, no rice etc etc. Then he stopped and said that he did not want to walk any further and that we should go back. He was from Miami and I pleaded with him to trust me, that the place we were going was famous and highly rated, but not impressive looking - just a corner deli and store. He demanded to know how much further and again told of his diet. At that point, his attitude just seemed unreasonably demanding and I began to dread having to spend more time with him. I told him we did not seem to be hitting it off and offered to pay him part of the planned amount to just call it off. (agreement was $200 for first 90 minutes and if we hit it off, $200 for next 90 minutes). At that point, he kind of changed his tone and said ok he would keep walking. He got the food and since there are no tables, I suggested eating at a gay bar just down the street - they have a policy of allowing food from Verti Mart to be eaten there. He did not want to do that but finally agreed. It turned out that he loved the food, he had a great time in the bar (drag show) and we went on to get to know each other better and actually had a good time the rest of the evening.

 

So with or without regard to my particular situation, what about the concept of offering to terminate an agreement and pay a portion of the proposed fee if upon meeting an escort, it just does not seem like it is going to work? Is this just breach of agreement and arrogance on the part of the client or is it fair?

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Disagree...unless there was some grotesque violation of expectations, you're on the hook for the agreed upon minimum scheduled appointment - in this case $200 for the first 90 minutes. The exception might be if you told him up front that "I'd like to walk around the Quarter and find some food somewhere to eat at this bar I know", but as far as I can tell, your plans were vague and he was just being himself. I have no problem with the idea of not paying for the second act of the date if it didn't happen, and wouldn't have any problem with you giving him less than $200 if he told you one thing and then did another - but given your description, I think he did what you contracted for and understood that there may not be chemistry beforehand. More importantly, it shows once again the importance of hiring well reviewed guys who you have communicated with in some detail with...

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Offering a partial payment for a session terminated because the escort does not perform is perfectly reasonable. However, an escort stating he is hungry, has dietary limitations, and does not wish to walk seven blocks off the beaten path in the heat to get food does not, to me, constitute non-performance. The situation could have been avoided by doing some pre-encounter planning together. We don't know whether or not the escort is well-reviewed, but I can think of a few well-reviewed escorts who are great in bed but would not want to walk around in the heat at 11PM.

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Disagree...unless there was some grotesque violation of expectations, you're on the hook for the agreed upon minimum scheduled appointment

I agree to this. I have been in situations where the client finishes in 15 minutes and then expects to pay just a quarter of the hour. A better pricing wording would be "$000 per session (one hour or less)."

But if presented this way, you would have to specify what a "session" means. Usually we sell companionship. In the case of Jake, he was kind enough to try ending the session when he realized that his "session" was no going well and politely offered to pay a cancelation fee, although he did not present it like that. Other, less-educated client would have just call it quits and walk away leaving the escort empty handed.

On the other side, the escort seem a bit unwelcoming and whiny with many diet demands. A happy and accommodating provider get repeat business.

I'm glad that things turn out good at the end for Jake.

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I'm of mixed thoughts. My initial thought was that you had hired the guy and were stuck for the initial fee. On the other hand if he had flatly refused to continue walking in The Quarter, when that was what you had told him the evening would consist of, I could definitely see you only needing to pay a portion. It would be comparable- to meeting an escort who beforehand told you he would bottom and was into passionate kissing- and after arriving and within 10 to 15 minutes of the session- you find he won't bottom and isn't (at least with you) into kissing.

 

So depending on how far into the appointment you were, if you had canceled it when he wanted to quit, you might have been very justified in prorating the fee.

 

Gman

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There's no right or wrong, just do what you think is best to safeguard your health. My opinion ..... I would say you were on the hook for the first 200, but no more. I probably would have stopped reasoning with him, and just kept walking. Either he comes along and gets his meal and money or walks off into the night, and you're off the hook which is what you wanted.

 

I have ended an appointment immediately because of misrepresentations, and because I'm a nice guy (ha!), gave cab fare and sent him away. Because of lousy chemistry, I have ended several appointments early, and depending on the situation, gave full fee or generous proration. But none of these were hourlies, since I don't hire for that. These were evening or overnight sessions in which I lost interest and knew that nothing exceptional would be experienced with those providers. Yeah, they're wasted money, but I'd rather end it than try to fake interest. Good experiences with escorts are investments in happiness; the duds are the only ones who consume your money, and represent the true cost of pursuing this hobby.

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A token payment for an early termination of an off-putting hire is entirely reasonable. It's your time too.

 

+1...Making partial payment when you realize that chemistry and compatibility is lacking is perfectly reasonable. So yes, the concept is defensible as a general rule, but every situation is different. Once you hire an escort, and you do not make prior arrangements for a meet-n-greet over coffe, and you suddenly realize that there isn't chemistry, and the escort really hasn't done anything wrong, I would say the client owes the fee. I will say, that in this particular situation, I don't believe the escort really didn't much wrong. I would have paid his fee, and sent him on his way.

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I am glad this worked out for you. As to his attitude as described in your report, he comes off as whiny and demanding. I would have asked him for alternative choices and if any were made and were acceptable I probably would have done that. If he failed to come up with an acceptable alternative, i would have told him that it is a tie and the tie goes to the payer, so walk or leave.

In my case, the escort is going to be younger and in better shape and he would be fortunate that he did not have to carry me there in the heat.

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