Birthday Wishes for Fin Fang Foom

[BewareofNick]

What is an appropriate gift to get the queen who has everything?

[VaHawk]

Happy Birthday FFF! http://www.rocketsky.net/~mysmilies/otn/party/hb2.gif

May you be blessed with many, many more; at least as many as that homely Helen Thomas you use as your avatar (oops if that's really you, then accept my abject apologies and sincere sympathy).

 

My birthday wish for FFF, is to have everyone chip in to buy him an overnighter with Super JDW, in other words, the dumbest damn whore in the entire world. ]http://www.tcwozere.co.uk/~cracks/contrib/dvv/cwmddd.gif

An escort who is as built as Mr. Universe, as hung as Mr. Ed, as blind as Mr. Magoo and as dumb as Mr. Bill.

 

The only thanks required would be a no-holds barred, sexually explicit in depth review posted on HB escort reviews and a promise to keep posting often hilarious, sometimes controversial, but always entertaining posts. http://www.tcwozere.co.uk/~cracks/otn/happy/wave.gif

[TinyBubbles]

Ladies and Gentlemen:

 

Please join me in sending birthday greetings out to Fin Fang Foom, who is celebrating a birthday this week. Some people get better, you just get bitter. LOVE YOU Darling!!! Tiny Bubbles

[HooBoy]

Hey FFF,

 

If I pay you to BLOW the candles, does that make you a whore?

 

}(

 

Happy Birthday, babe...

[+ Lucky]

You'd have to pay an awful lot for all those candles!

[Guest Fin Fang Foom]

>Hey FFF,

>

>If I pay you to BLOW the candles, does that make you a whore?

 

Only if you insist that I be fucking you while I blow them out.

 

<g>

 

By the way, thanks TB for alerting the media. I had to push my way through a phalanx of photographers when I came home last night and I chipped a nail in the process.

 

I hate it when that happens.

 

Celebratorily yours,

 

FFF

[jackhammer91406]

best ways to start the day

 

Boy, did I get a laugh out of this. It put a smile on my face almost as big as some of Les' pic posts. (LJ likes Les' stuff better, but me I think something funny is one of the best ways to start the day).

FFF, Many, many happy returns from me and "you know who"

 

:7

[btmstudnyc]

Happy Birthday

 

Happy Birthday FFF

aka

Fist Fucking Fart

Fabulous Farting Faggot

Finking Fuscian Facade

Fantastic Full Figurine

Foregone Flowing Filly

Faraway Fantasia Fello

Fast Furious Filipina

Fistidious Faking Female

 

Fucking forego all fabulous gifts to be fucking fabulous.

Hope someone hires you One JADW (just a fucking dumb whore, not necessarily Rick Munroe) for every year that you are old.

 

JIM

 

Be a dumb whore...or just look like one (call BARBIZON TALENT AGENCY)

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Inquiring Minds Want To Know

 

Commonly referred to as “The First, Foremost and Frankest Bitch of the Message Center,” White House Pastry Chef Fin Fang Foom is a trailblazer, breaking through barriers for gay republicans who hire male "companions" while creating towering, cream filled, lightly sugar-dusted pastry creations for every President since John Qunicey Adams. For 173 years, Mr. Fang Foom also served as custodian of the silver spoon given by Abigail and John Adams to their son, which was to be passed along to the white male known as the "Annoited One," selected to lead this great nation away from hybrid technology, energy independence and male companions who do not know how to use the English language as the good Lord intended.

 

Born in Log Cabin outside Gramercy Park, Mr. Fang Foom, or FCubed as he is referred to by his nearest and dearest friends, was raised in the housing projects of Moscow where he attended public schools and apprenticed at the knees of Tsar Alexander the First. Mr. Fan Foom later graduated with distinction from the Berlin Culinary Academy.

 

FFF also has the distinction of being the only pastry chef to point out the enormous quanties of cream filled delicacies consumed by William Jefferson Clinton during his presidency. He was also the only pastry chef to travel to Grenada during the liberation of that imperiled island nation, making sure that all wounded American soldiars in that conflict had a warm, moist fresh cinnamon bun waiting by their bedside. When then President Nixon traveled to Amsterdam for his super duper deadly secret double special breakthrough mission in August, 1969, FFF had the distinction of showing Dick, as he was priviliged to call Mr. Nixon, the texture and consistency of Belgian cream first hand, particularly heavy and whipped cream. Aaron Lawrence has cited him as one of the 47,000 Most Influential Pastry Chefs in America. A party in his honor will be held at Harris Promenade, Douglas, Isle of Man.

 

 

 

 

http://www.aeispeakers.com/Thomas-Helen.htm

[Southern Blue Suicide]

The perfect gift for a queen with everything would be one of those cute little desktop boxes to hold all her Social Security checks(Karen Walker chic) or maybe a compartmentalized 30 day "remember your daily dose" pill box. I'm sure if you check into it, Hammacher Schlemmer can put you into contact with the Douche of the Month club.

 

 

-Mc-