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lessons I never learn


Guest verymarried
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Guest verymarried

Picked up a cute guy in a sleazy new orleans bar. Im lucky I am alive. I took him to my hotel room and paid him generously. Next day he calls that he wants to come over. He "has something for me." I had some plans but he insisted to stop by for "5 minutes." He knocked, I opened the door and he barged in wanting money. I asked him to leave but he threatened all kinds of things. I ended up paying a small amount. Oh also I gave him enough info about myself and family that a resourceful person could locate us. I am writing not to receive sympathy, or criticism - I know what I did wrong - but I thought it a good reminder to you and to me about the risks which are out there. This is actually the second time I have found myself in such a situation, so I am not sure exactly if I am capable of any learning experience in the matter.

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Picked up a cute guy in a sleazy new orleans bar. Im lucky I am alive. I took him to my hotel room and paid him generously. Next day he calls that he wants to come over. He "has something for me." I had some plans but he insisted to stop by for "5 minutes." He knocked, I opened the door and he barged in wanting money. I asked him to leave but he threatened all kinds of things. I ended up paying a small amount. Oh also I gave him enough info about myself and family that a resourceful person could locate us. I am writing not to receive sympathy, or criticism - I know what I did wrong - but I thought it a good reminder to you and to me about the risks which are out there. This is actually the second time I have found myself in such a situation, so I am not sure exactly if I am capable of any learning experience in the matter.

 

I think your "dick" needs therapy ? . But I am happy you escaped your situations without harm other than to your ego and wallet....

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Wow, sorry this happened to you. We can all agree or disagree about whether or not you should have given into the thugs demands or they might even express their bravado about how they would have stood up to the bully themselves or called security etc. The important thing here is that you are safe.

 

Unfortunately you will have people here chime in and tell you this complete bullshit line about how you should never pick anyone at a bar who isn't reviewed on this website. We all except risks in every choice we make from picking up a hot guy at the bar to crossing the street.

 

What I don't understand and would like to learn from your experience is why you gave this person enough information about you and your family that you think he could hurt them and why you feel you can't learn from this horrible experience.

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Wow, that is scary and a wakeup call. That could happen to alot of people. I have decided that I only consider guys that have been well reviewed and I will try to get members on this forum to provide any insight on guys I am considering. Glad to hear you are ok and I understand your concerns about family information, that is always a scary thought about information being given out. Hopefully it is all over and nothing more will come of it. Take care.

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Every story I hear about New Orleans is a bad one. You shouldn't punish yourself any further than you have. Many of us have picked up strangers and brought them home, even when we knew better. I had a guy smoke crack in my bathroom and then show up playing his guitar in front of my building the next day. The lovely young man attempted to circumvent my doormen and security when I didn't answer his calls. Potentially dangerous, and very embarrassing.

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Picked up a cute guy in a sleazy new orleans bar. Im lucky I am alive. I took him to my hotel room and paid him generously. Next day he calls that he wants to come over. He "has something for me." I had some plans but he insisted to stop by for "5 minutes." He knocked, I opened the door and he barged in wanting money. I asked him to leave but he threatened all kinds of things. I ended up paying a small amount. Oh also I gave him enough info about myself and family that a resourceful person could locate us. I am writing not to receive sympathy, or criticism - I know what I did wrong - but I thought it a good reminder to you and to me about the risks which are out there. This is actually the second time I have found myself in such a situation, so I am not sure exactly if I am capable of any learning experience in the matter.

 

The title to this thread will become a self-fulfilling prophecy if you let it. Perhaps you should say: "this is the last time I ever do this," instead of "a lesson I'll never learn." Otherwise, it's going to bite you on the ass eventually.

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Guest Connoisseur

I'll echo that I'm glad you are ok and hope, as you said, you'll learn this time and not repeat. I have been to Louisiana and the pickings on the usual sites are basically non existent for 18-28 year old, clean cut, white, in shape guys so if I wanted to be with someone might have done the same thing you did. Not after this thread of course :) Hopefully you've moved to a different hotel and if once you go home you won't even get phone calls from this guy.

 

Probably no chance you can write a review so if someone looks for reviews in NOLA they'll know what not to do, a description of the guy to say away from and more on where you met him, how you approached him or maybe he approached you, etc. Inquiring minds want to know.

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Verymarried

Sounds like you picked this guy up from a bar BUT why did you pay him? Was this a prearranged meeting or a random pickup. Did he solicit you? Just trying to find out why there was payment. I would think that most bar Hopkins don't involve money? If he is an escort than he is trouble for anyone else who hires him. As with the rest of the members here I am glad that no physical harm came of it. Stay safe.

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Glad you're all right. You apparently took some unwise risks here - like maybe telling too much of your personal information to a guy you didn't know anything about. Did alcohol entered into this experience for you (you mentioned being in a bar)- was your tongue loosened enough to be indiscreet with personal information that you shouldn't have divulged? Try try try to learn something form this.

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I had someone sleepover and the next day he stole 2 pieces of artwork (on loan from a local gallery) from my building's lobby. He didn't know he was captured on camera whilst the doorman was busy doing something. It was extremely embarassing for me as i was questioned, had to look at the grainy video, and had to help locate the artwork. They weren't too expensive but i had a heck of a time convincing the guy to return the art. It took 3 months of phone calls and pleading to him to return. In exchange, i paid him a small ransom and also made a large donation to the condo board. Lesson learned: walk guests down to lobby.

 

 

 

 

Every story I hear about New Orleans is a bad one. You shouldn't punish yourself any further than you have. Many of us have picked up strangers and brought them home, even when we knew better. I had a guy smoke crack in my bathroom and then show up playing his guitar in front of my building the next day. The lovely young man attempted to circumvent my doormen and security when I didn't answer his calls. Potentially dangerous, and very embarrassing.
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I had someone sleepover and the next day he stole 2 pieces of artwork (on loan from a local gallery) from my building's lobby. He didn't know he was captured on camera whilst the doorman was busy doing something. It was extremely embarassing for me as i was questioned, had to look at the grainy video, and had to help locate the artwork. They weren't too expensive but i had a heck of a time convincing the guy to return the art. It took 3 months of phone calls and pleading to him to return. In exchange, i paid him a small ransom and also made a large donation to the condo board. Lesson learned: walk guests down to lobby.

 

Yeah, that's where I would take my local mobster out to a steak and lobster dinner and say "hey, there's this guy..."

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Guest verymarried

Just wanted to thank the forum for helpful comments. There were a few questions I will quickly answer:

 

1. Was I drinking? Absolutely. Worse still, I never drink beyond a glass of wine.

2. Why did I reveal personal information? combination of alcohol and honest responses to a guy who seemed sincere, open and honest. Naive of course on my part.

3. Why did I pay? I was at a bar, the Corner Pocket, where guys either are middle aged and up and pay, or are 20's and receive payment. He was not a current dancer but a former one. The management is usually reasonably observant about current dancers. They are quick to not allow obvious troublemakers to dance. This guy just paid admission and came in. I think he may have been banned at one time from dancing though I am not sure. I aproached him because he was alone and great looking.

4. Thanks again for your upbeat words.

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Your second point above is the scary part - I bet most of us on this board have done the same thing you did. But point three makes it sound like you were in a hustler bar and probably should have kept that in mind. Not being judgmental here or putting you down for what you did - as I said, probably most of us have had similar experiences that thankfully didn't turn out like yours did. The universe owes you a little on this one (karma, y'know) - hopefully you'll have no further repercussions.

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Just wanted to thank the forum for helpful comments. There were a few questions I will quickly answer:

 

1. Was I drinking? Absolutely. Worse still, I never drink beyond a glass of wine.

2. Why did I reveal personal information? combination of alcohol and honest responses to a guy who seemed sincere, open and honest. Naive of course on my part.

3. Why did I pay? I was at a bar, the Corner Pocket, where guys either are middle aged and up and pay, or are 20's and receive payment. He was not a current dancer but a former one. The management is usually reasonably observant about current dancers. They are quick to not allow obvious troublemakers to dance. This guy just paid admission and came in. I think he may have been banned at one time from dancing though I am not sure. I aproached him because he was alone and great looking.

4. Thanks again for your upbeat words.

 

Verymarried, I am sure you LEARNED your lesson, but whether or not you impart that knowledge in the future is the OTHER issue at hand... It just seems to me that using "naivete" as an excuse is too easy. I cant imagine any adult NOT knowing he was being hustled. Perhaps the alcohol DID play into this, but I suspect you DID know better but just gave in to LUST ?

Its natural, normal, AND risky.... Next time, cranberry juice and soda with a twist !

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