Friday Funnies

[+ Gar1eth]

Finally, a department store that understands me.

 

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

A triathlon for the rest of us.

 

http://triathlonhumor.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/ironman.jpg

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

A triathlon for the rest of us.

 

http://triathlonhumor.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/ironman.jpg

 

Gman

 

Just look at 101's pleats!!!

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

 

The correct answer being, only if you miss!!

 

Gman

[+ quoththeraven]

Supposedly from an actual trial transcript. I am not vouching for anything other than its humor.

 

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?

WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'

ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?

WITNESS: My name is Susan!

[LADoug1]

>7) There weren't any freakin' cell phones either. If you left the house, you

>just didn't make a damn call or receive one. You actually had to be out of touch

>with your "friends". OH MY GOSH !!!

> Think of the horror... not being in touch with someone 24/7!!! And then

>there's TEXTING. Yeah, right. Please! You kids have no idea how

>annoying you are.

And they actually had PAY PHONES which all but disappeared.

[+ quoththeraven]

I think this one doesn't have to be exiled to Politics, Religion and War:

Source

[+ Gar1eth]

And they actually had PAY PHONES which all but disappeared.

 

I'm paying out the wazzoo for my phone, believe me.

 

Gman

[Guest]

I'm paying out the wazzoo for my phone, believe me.

 

Gman

Reminds me of an old Superbowl commercial...

[Guest]

An excuse you might use not to show up at work tomorrow...

[+ Gar1eth]

@geminibear, This explains so much!!

 

 

 

Gman

[TruHart1]

@geminibear, This explains so much!!

 

 

 

Gman

 

Ha Ha! Makes me think (even though it's baseball!) of Mr. Applegate's plan to use Lola to entice Joe away from his marriage by making him young again, helping him be the greatest pitcher and planning to take his soul. You know, that old story by JW Goethe, what was that? Oh yeah, Faust!

 

(edited to say my reference is to the musical, Damn Yankees, which I had planned to mention! :eek:)

 

TruHart1

Edited February 10, 2016 by TruHart1

[+ Gar1eth]

@geminibear, This explains so much!!

 

 

 

Gman

 

Ha Ha! Makes me think (even though it's baseball!) of Mr. Applegate's plan to use Lola to entice Joe away from his marriage by making him young again, helping him be the greatest pitcher and planning to take his soul. You know, that old story by JW Goethe, what was that? Oh yeah, Faust!

 

TruHart1

 

Also theme of A Year At The Top for those who remember it.

 

 

Gman

[BabyBoomer]

Also theme of A Year At The Top for those who remember it.

 

 

Gman

 

Greg Evigan pre BJ.

 

~ Boomer ~

[+ Gar1eth]

I'm a few days late on this, but 'Throw me something, Mister!!!'

 

http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j12/itsallos/Mobile%20Uploads/2016-02/258A35C6-5D82-4BC8-9573-B5E1C5A62D9F_zpssimwpewn.jpg

 

Gman

[Zman]

A Sausage Party Song....

[+ honcho]

Can I ask for a date with the Goateed Fireman in the Sausage Party?

[+ Gar1eth]

Sigh, there goes my last excuse for not jogging.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gman

[+ Truereview]

Sigh, there goes my last excuse for not jogging.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gman

Catchy tune! Why do I feel like I've seen a version of this product at my local gay strip joint?

 

~~make sure to pick up your jog strap at your local jogging supply store~~~

[TruHart1]

Please take note:

 

TruHart1

[+ Gar1eth]

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

From The Onion. You know sometimes it only satirizes. Then at other times like now it's spot on!!

How Supreme Court Justices Are Chosen

 

INFOGRAPHIC February 16, 2016

VOL 52 ISSUE 06 · News · Government · Supreme Court

http://i.onionstatic.com/onion/5271/6/original/1200.jpg

Here is a step-by-step guide to how U.S. Supreme Court justices are selected:

• Step 1: Supreme Court vacancy opens after a sitting justice dies, retires, or is promoted to the Galactic Circuit
   
  
• Step 2: President wistfully crosses out own name from list of potential candidates
   
  
• Step 3: Official presidential nominee slowly lowered by rope into Senate Judiciary Committee pit
   
  
• Step 4: Nominee charged one-time $30 background check fee
   
  
• Step 5: Candidate asked whether they see themselves in exact same place 35 years from now
   
  
• Step 6: Judiciary Committee members ask nominee whether they capable of writing a dissent that could be described as “blistering”
   
  
• Step 7: Candidate attests they have no opinion whatsoever on issue of abortion, don’t know what it is, and frankly have never heard such a word uttered before
   
  
• Step 8: Senate takes nominee out to drinks to see how they act in casual, informal setting
   
  
• Step 9: Nominee stands as their predecessor’s robe is draped over them to see if government can save a few bucks on not ordering a new one
   
  
• Step 10: Following months of direct questioning, witness testimony, and poring over the nominee’s qualifications and judicial history, the Senate votes on whether they like the president or not
   
  
• Step 11: If confirmed, justice takes oath of office and is assigned a bench buddy to help them through their first few opinions
   
  
• Step 12: If candidate not confirmed, process repeats indefinitely until other party holds White House or country is awash in the hot, crimson blood of neighbor killing neighbor, whichever comes first
  

Gman

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]