Seeking advice in making a loan to an escort...

[Cooper]

Recently an escort "friend" of mine, who works at the Gaiety, asked me if he could borrow some money. I've know him for about 9 months and I'm reluctant to do so because of his spending habits. He does not live in the USA and said he would repay the loan during his next show at the Gaiety (some 6 weeks)...When I inquired as to why he didn't ask his family or friends for the cash, he said he was "embarrassed" to ask them. (Yes, the light bulb lite up)...Have any of you had experiences with loans to escorts, and how did it work out?

[Guest SeaGuy]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

My advice on making loans to ANYBODY is don't unless you're FULLY prepared to forfeit and loose all the money. Even banks, while taking every precaution possible in screening applicants, must be prepared for the possibility of loss of their money. So if you can consider the loan a gift that will possibly be paid back you'll spare yourself a great many headaches and worry.

[Guest lipstick]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

Same reaction here.

 

NEVER loan any money to anyone unless you can afford to lose it all.

Unless you feel sorry for the guy and don't expect to be "paid back" in other 'scort ways, don't break down: you very likely are being manipulated. How much is he asking for, by the way?

 

The other possiblilities are that he dies (this actually happened to me once ---- no, not ME dying, silly.....!), loses his Visa, decides not to come back, etc.

 

Ask youself this question: why me? Ask the escort the same question.

[Paul Revere]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

This is an easy question to answer. DON'T DO IT!

 

It never ends well. Much to my own surprise I advanced a dancer money once. And I never do stuff like that. I was caught in a week moment. I even agreed that he could work the amount off in trade (if you will). I got a couple of comped privates, but never really recovered the value of the "loan". I wrote it off to my own stupiity and vulnerability. Lesson learned.

 

And now that I am thinking about it, that very same dancer is working at the Gaiety this week, and I'll bet its the same one. He always has a sob story; "My car was stolen", "I wrecked my motorcycle", "I need cash for the hotel and I don't have a credit card" etc. etc. and on and on. I've heard them all.

 

The dancers at the Gaiety make great money in a week for someone thier age. They should manage better. Some of the dancers are OK guys, and some will "befreind" you, but the bottom line is you are a client and its all about the money.

 

Just make and excuse or flat out say "No". I know that you mean well, and simply want to help someone who is seemingly in need, but you will regret it. You are being played. If this guy is pulling down between $5,000 and $10,000 for the week at the Gaiety, then you shouldn't need to lend him anything. If he can't get by on that kind of cash, he needs to deal with his drug habit (or whatever).

 

"Neither a borrower or lender be!"

[+ deej]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

I'll echo the other guys. If you can afford to throw away the money it's OK.

 

Having said that, I *have* loaned money to an escort before. I'd seen him fairly regularly over a period of about 5 years. He was in a situation where he might lose his vehicle, which was actually his primary business. (He sells his ass on the side because he likes getting fucked.)

 

He paid me back in trade, which was our original agreement. (And the trade wasn't all sex -- I got free limo rides to the airport as well.) If anything, he's OVER re-paid me, and insists he owes me two more sessions. I won't argue. :9

 

It's going to depend on how well you know the guy, and you still have to be prepared to walk away from the money. But it doesn't HAVE to end badly.

[+ bigjoey]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

been there, done that. as been said unless you can afford to lose the money then do not do it. while one guy i'd known a few years paid me back, several others did not. i'm just a soft touch i guess. my advice is do not do it.

[Guest NakedTony]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan...

 

Loaning money to ANYONE (including family) really changes the dynamics of the relationship. I totally agree that you've got to be prepared to lose both the money and the relationship.

 

Depending on how much money is involved, I'd maybe suggest that you take it out in trade BEFORE loaning the money. (I.e., if he want $500 then take 2-3 hours of sex in trade.) At least you'd get physically fucked while you're being financially sucked. ;-)

[Guest Traveler]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan to an escort

 

This again reminds me of the Steve Martin movie The Man With Two Brains. There's a scene where he asks his deceased wife to give him a sign if he shouldn't marry the woman he was currently seeing. The lights go out in his house, the house echoes with "NO, NO, NO," and he gets struck by lightning. Then he just repeats "Just give me a sign, any sign!"

[Will]

RE: Making a loan to an escort...

 

This is what I do: on the rare occasion that someone asks to borrow money from me, I immediately decide whether or not I'd like to make him a gift of it. If I would not want just to give it to him, outright with no expectations, I refuse the loan. If I would want to make a gift, I tell him so. I just give him the money. Usually people won't take it. But even if they do, you should just hand it over and abandon the pretense that it's a loan. It's not and it looks to me as thoug you already know that, but are sort of hoping for an excuse to make it on the long chance that he'll pay it back in trade. He won't. He won't pay it back in any form. Period.

[Guest TexasTaurus]

Happened to me..

 

I NEVER loan money. Not to escorts, friends, or family. It changes the entire relationship (as stated above).

 

If someone needs money and I can help (family in particular), I GIVE them the money. No loan! No repayment! No guilt trips! No avoiding me because they can't pay it back!

 

If you want to and can give him the money, then GIVE it to him. My question is, why do you want to?

[BuckyXTC]

RE: Making a loan to an escort...

 

Some very sound advice given here by previous posters. I've lent money to an escort before, and he paid me back in cold hard cash in quick fashion. I also consider him one of my best friends, and when I found myself in a situation of being short of funds, he immediately offered money to me. That said, I think this is the rare situation and not the norm. And when I lent him money, I did so, as Will suggests, without expectation or desire of being repaid. So if you're comfortable with not being repaid, there's nothing wrong with doing it. If you expect to be repaid, there's a good chance you may be disappointed.

[Guest]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan to an escort

 

>Recently an escort "friend" of mine, who works at the

>Gaiety, asked me if he could borrow some money. I've know

>him for about 9 months and I'm reluctant to do so because of

>his spending habits. He does not live in the USA

 

How good a "friend" can he be if he doesn't even live in the USA? He would surely have had to burn a lot of bridges with his real friends, family, financial institutions, etc., if he has to turn to you for a loan. What's he done for you to deserve your generosity?

[Guest SeaGuy]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan

 

>The dancers at the Gaiety make great money in a week for

>someone thier age. They should manage better.

 

>If this guy is pulling down between $5,000 and $10,000 for the

>week at the Gaiety, then you shouldn't need to lend him

>anything. If he can't get by on that kind of cash, he needs

>to deal with his drug habit (or whatever).

>

>"Neither a borrower or lender be!"

 

$5,000-10,000 DOLLARS A WEEK!:o HOLY SHIT! You should be asking the escort/dancer for a loan not the other way around. Damn, I gotta go to the Gaiety to meet a rich dancer/escort/future husband or at the very least get a hand out or a loan from one. Forget law and medicine little boys, when you grow up become a dancer at the Gaiety.

[jack]

RE: Seeking advice in making a loan to an escort

 

For such a question, this is a very thoughtful sharing gracious group and I just know if I ever do something really really stupid or even think out loud about doing something really really naiev and stupid that I can bank on the forthright and sincerely focused fraternal support of this elite group. For some reason, the question simply struck me a being really stupid. But, then, when I put it into perspective, here I'm planning on going back to Montreal next week, to stop off in Campus, Stock, spend some quality time in Nirvana (where I can suck some cock during a private) all to really get to Taboo and Louis whom I hope will be there (though I would never display any disappointment) to make out and fondle him for an hour and a half right at the bar while the nude kids dance before taking him back to the hotel for some nice gentle impassioned rimming and sucking for $200 American that, per Will, I'll just give him. . . this entire episode following a Board Meeting and golf someplace with the white shoed crowd all of whom would think I was really really doing something stupid too but which I really really love and is a part of my balanced life; that is, having a young cock in my mouth. But, I still think the loan question was really stupid. :9

[Guest Merlin]

RE: Seeking advice in making

 

As Naked Tony says, it changes the relationship. When it comes time for him to repay you, he will have other prioities. He will think that paying his rent, auto payment, buying new clothes etc etc is more important than paying you. After all, you don't need the money so he can put you off a little longer. Worse, when he sees you coming he will think you are expecting to be paid. He will be afraid you will ask him for it. So, he will begin avoiding you. In the end, you lose your money and your "friend". To be sure there are a few exceptions, but it is not a good gamble. Better to give him a gift, and if you cannot afford that then simply say no.

[Guest Joey Ciccone]

RE: Seeking advice making a loan to an escort

 

Never lend money (or your car) to an out of town hooker. Not smart.

[Guest squaddie]

RE: Seeking advice making a loan to an escort

 

Always follow your gut feeling. I've done so twice, right once and wrong once so take this with a pinch of salt. As the first reply states 'only if you are prepared to lose it'.

On the first occassion I had got to know the escort for about three years. From my time with him and telephone calls and meals out I got an impression that here was an honest guy. He had a delay in a bank transfer and needed the money urgently to pay his morgage. I gave it to him and was repaid the following week as he said he would. This was the first and only time he asked for a loan. He no longer escorts but I still meet up with him from time to time.

The other, also known over a three year period, was always short of cash. he always asked for enough money to cover a couple of sessions which I would consider prepayment. However, the last occassion I had to ask for the money and he flipped. I didn't get the money back nor have we spoken since.

[+ glutes]

RE: Seeking advice making a loan to an escort

 

Just a thought from glutes here. I was once asked on the phone by a family member for a subsantial amount of money on a 'loan' basis - including some pressure to do it. When I considered it over a week, and then wrote back that it was denied, they came back and said the request was just a joke! With all people seeking loans now, I have them put it in writting, including the terms. This has disuaded any pursuit or pressure for the loan.

[BgMstr4u]

RE: Seeking advice making a loan to an escort

 

Many sensible posts here. Just a thought or two to add.

 

As several have said, never loan what you can't afford to give or lose. You probably will.

 

You might consider what would happen to your escorting activities if the guy is taking you for a ride and you fall for it. How many people does he talk to?

 

In my experience, loans to family and friends, even if they are paid back, always change the relationship, and never for the better. If they are paid back, there is always a memory of who-helped-whom which is not always conducive to an unclouded dynamic. If they aren't paid back, you and the other party may spend more energy avoiding the subject and/or each other than it was worth in the first place.

 

Don't do it.

 

But -- if you are hell-bent on helping the lad, work out an escort deal with him: hire him for the amount. If it's a lot, get a lot from him. An overnight. A weekend. A week. Whatever.

 

And who is this guy, so we can avoid him?

[DaninWA]

RE: Happened to me..

 

Texas Taurus,

 

I agree completely. I am not a bank. I don't lend money. If a friend or family member truly needs money and I can help, then I give it. Period.

 

Dan

[Paul Revere]

So what happened?

 

So Cooper, what happened? Did Casey get his loan?

[Cooper]

RE: So what happened?

 

>So Cooper, what happened? Did Casey get his loan?

 

Hey Paul,

The jury is still out on the loan issue. I'm not comfortable in giving this escort any more money, even as a "gift". The last time I spoke to him I suggested that if he had seriously wanted a new car he should start saving those "Gaiety Dollars". Once he can show me he can save I might revisit his request. Someone had suggested that I give him a small loan and see if he can pay that back. What are your thoughts?

 

Paul, I know who Casey @ the Gaiety is. I've never been with him so please don't start any rumors. I guess you've had a bad experience with him, but how is his "private"? I've been with Trevor, and his "private" was awful, he does NOTHING, you do all the work. Austin looks good on stage, but I heard his "private" is nothing worth talking about. I see Tyler is coming in this week, any thoughts on him? One of the best "privates" I've had recently was with Jay from Chicago. He's great looking and will definately please. I hear he's coming back in mid-Sept.

 

Thanks again for showing an interest in my posts. I'm a real softy when it comes to these escorts and any advice is well taken. Coops...