Looking for Mr. Goodbar

[VaHawk]

Is Mr. GoodBar a fetish, or is it kink, or is it both or perhaps neither?

 

I have done every thing that has been expressed as a fetish on this forum so far and then some, as no one has mentioned scat, fisting or heavy duty s/m. Forget scat, as I can not think of anything more disgusting, either giving or receiving, and as such have not participated in that scene. The same with getting fisted, although I have fisted others many times. As far as s/m been on the cross, delivered to others on the cross, been collared and chained as a puppy dog and have done the same to others. I’ve licked their leather boots and made them lick mine.

 

Almost all have been fun one time, but rarely fun afterwards, so maybe I’m just not into fetishes. I don’t want to lick your smelly, hairy armpits. I don’t want to dock with your uncut, head cheesy dick. I don’t want to sniff, your soiled underwear. I don’t want to piss on you or piss in your mouth, and I don’t want you to piss on me or piss in my mouth. I don’t want to handcuff you, whip you with a cat-o-nine-tails, punch you out, wrestle with you or have you do the same to me! I don’t want to dress in a uniform to fulfill your fantasy, nor do I want you to do the same, as uniformed men are only hot if the uniform is part of who they are as an everyday guy.

 

What I do fantasize about, is that Mr. Goodbar guy! I’ve only seen one in my entire life, knew it, stated it to him, got a willing response, but he wound up getting sidetracked.

 

Wow, Mr. Goodbar, is just like a sinfully delicious, silky smooth Hershey’s bar, but just a little more on the nutty side. No one chokes on a Hershey’s bar after all, as the chocolate will melt but those damn nuts won’t melt, they will just choke you to death!

 

I want a Mr. Goodbar, but all I encounter are Hershey’s Bars!

[Luv2play]

VaHawk, Bless you, you seem to have done quite a lot of "fetishy" or "kinky" things in your life and have avoided others. But it seems to me, at least, that you have not truly been "into" it. Rather, you have experimented with it, it seems, and found it empty for your purposes. Nothing wrong with that. That is what makes us all unique individuals. What appeals to me doesn't turn your crank, and so what, as long as I can find others that are like-minded as I am.

I remember watching Looking for Mr Goodbar when I was just coming out as a gay man. I identified with the woman in Diane Keaton's role, as someone searching for a walk on the wild side. Unfortunately, the moral of that story was that too much of a good thing can turn out to be a nasty thing or even worse. It was a good cautionary tale though, and who can ever forget that guy's cute ass }(

[VaHawk]

Thanks, Luv, as you are so on target, as I've seen it all and done it all, and as you say "never got into any of it"!

 

IMO, the whole Mr. Goodbar thing is all about being jaded after seeing and doing it all, and Mr. Goodbar, in the end provides the ultimate experience of death, which will be as BORING and unfulfilling as the rest of life's bullshit!

[bostonman]

"Looking everywhere, haven't found him yet.

He's the big affair I can not forget.

Only man I ever think of with regret."

 

- Ira Gershwin ("Someone To Watch Over Me")

 

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[Guest DevonSFescort]

Beautifully written post. I think there are a lot of people who can relate to this "fetish."

[Rick Munroe]

>What I do fantasize about, is that Mr. Goodbar guy! I’ve only

>seen one in my entire life, knew it, stated it to him, got a

>willing response, but he wound up getting sidetracked.

 

What is a Mr. Goodbar guy?? I've never seen the film.

[Guest DevonSFescort]

>What is a Mr. Goodbar guy?? I've never seen the film.

 

Oh, you should rent it. It's fascinating as a cultural document (I think it's from 1980) and shows Diane Keaton in a different light than audiences conditioned to her performances in Woody Allen movies would have been used to seeing her. It traces her development from wide-eyed college student to a double life as a schoolteacher and haunter of singles bars by night. She gets into drugs and her lifestyle gets progressively wilder until the movie, which is quite long, ends rather abruptly in a scene which, while obviously calculated to shock, manages to do so rather artfully and ranks up there, in my mind, at least, with Catherine Deneuve's rape scenes in 'Repulsion' for raw potency and the power to disturb. I have to give this achievement all the more credit because of my misgivings about the movie's heavy-handed polemicism (its cautionary message is a reactionary response to the sexual liberation movements of the seventies); nevertheless my respect for Keaton's performance, some of the filmmaker's more effective choices, and the added appeal of appearances by a very youthful Richard Gere, who's something of a caricature but easy on the eyes, and a young Tom Berenger in a small but incredibly important and...interesting role, all add up enough to make the good outweigh the bad (also, Tuesday Weld plays Keaton's sister and got an Oscar nomination for her performance). It's an obvious forerunner to Fatal Attraction, and its timing -- just before the first reports of "gay cancer" -- couldn't be eerier. I took a queer film history class and our professor played a few scenes in this movie for discussion. I'll let you rent the movie to see why rather than ruin it for you.

 

There are a variety of perspectives about the movie here:

 

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/LookingforMrGoodbar-1012681/

[Candyman]

Mr Goodbar is a candy. Don't ask me what or where you do with it :9