If you could change the legal age what would you change it to?

[bluenix]

RE: If you could change the legal age...

 

For the youngsters here ;-), it's perhaps good to add that you are happy with the way things have turned out?

 

I sure am.

[+ deej]

RE: If you could change the legal age...

 

Add a fourth to the mix. I was a 16-year-old slut.

 

I preferred college-age preppy/jock types (which is still true today) and picked up a TON of them in the local boothstore. (It had a back entrance so you didn't have to go past the cashier. WOO HOO)

 

Will never forget my first very nervous visit to that place. Couldn't for the life of me figure out why the guy in the next booth was sticking his fingers through the hole in the wall. I thought it was just a place to watch movies! LOL Fortunately, he was kind enough to whisper his intentions.

 

Spent many hours hugging those plywood walls, but the real fun was picking up some jock who's roommate was out of town for the weekend.

 

Ah, the good old days. :9

 

If my parents had ANY idea what I was getting into, they never would've let me out of the house. But I had a "goodie-goodie" reputation and made the most of it. LOL

[bluenix]

RE: If you could change the legal age...

 

Why, deej. You sly fox. :9

[phage]

RE: If you could change the legal age...

 

>For the youngsters here ;-), it's perhaps good to add that

>you are happy with the way things have turned out?

>

>I sure am.

 

Oh yeah. I was pleased as punch with myself the next day and it still puts a smile on my face. I was a manipulative little shit but it was a very positive experience.

 

I had been fooling around with my best friend for a couple of years but we neither kissed nor did anal. I was able to pass on what I learned that night and it took our relationship to a new level. He actually became my boyfriend after that and we were together until we graduated and went to different colleges.

[Guest WetDream]

RE: If you could change the legal age...

 

Yes, wouldn't have changed a thing. And it was a bit relief to get that virginity thing out of the way.

[+ Charlie]

RE: If you could change the legal age...?

 

Although I agree with deej that any age of consent is arbitrary and ignores individual variation in maturity, I am in favor of an arbitrary age simply because there is no way to write a law that can reasonably accommmodate individual differences. I came out at seventeen and was attracted to older men as well as to my peers. I looked older than I was, and had lots of sexual experiences with men in their 20s, 30s and 40s. In most cases they were not exploiting me--sometimes I was exploiting them--and they certainly didn't deserve to be prosecuted for corrupting this minor. And at 19 I brought someone home and only discovered post-coitus that he was 16.

 

Nevertheless, I am sensitive to the possibilities of exploitation of young persons by older men, and I do think it should be against the law. Therefore, there has to be some sort of age boundary drawn. In an era in which most teenagers are more knowledgeable about sex than they were in my youth (they are also more physically mature, as recent studies on the age at which girls start to menstruate have revealed), I would set the age at 16, recognizing that some miscarriages of justice in the absolute sense are going to occur.

[Guest DCescortBOY]

RE: If you could change the legal age...?

 

>And at 19 I brought someone home and only discovered

>post-coitus that he was 16.

 

as a responsible adult, shouldn't you have asked his age (or even his name!) BEFORE coition?

[Guest cp8036]

RE: If you could change the legal age...?

 

<...as a responsible adult, shouldn't you have asked his age (or even his name!) BEFORE coition...>

 

This assumes that he, or any 19yo, is a responsible adult. Most are, but some are not. It goes to the arbitrary setting of age.

[Guest 7Zach]

RE: If you could change the legal age...?

 

for the record, a lot of states differentiate between 55 and 17 and 15-17 & 18, meaning statutory rape (or the inability to give informed consent) does not happen if the age difference between the minor and the adult is 4 years, or lesser amount. Even in those cases, the usual rule (before this change in statutory policy) was that around 13-14 years, or less, no consent may be given at all because the minor was too immature to make an informed consent. Varies from state to state.

I think the reasoning for the above makes sense, in that a 15 year could have a boy/girl friend who would be less than 4 years older, and they could decide whether they're going to have sex. 15 seems too young for me for a 19 year old, but the fact is that they're capable of making such consent. Whether they would have made the consent, with hindsight, at a later age doesn't matter: the key is that the states decided that it was unfair to just say that no 15 or 16 year old could consent, and thereby punish the slightly older adult.

One reason for the change was that under prior law, the only out for the boy in boy/girl situation was to show that she was over 14, and that she had been promiscuous in the past, and therefore show that consent was likely given. With the shield laws enacted in the late 70s and early 80s, the boy would be unable to defend at all for statutory rape charges, as opposed to an actual rape charge.

[+ deej]

RE: If you could change the legal age...?

 

>This assumes that he, or any 19yo, is a responsible adult.

>Most are, but some are not. It goes to the arbitrary

>setting of age.

 

Right you are, but we DO need to have some standard of measurement. Society demands it.

 

It is unfortunate that the US society is founded on such puritanical beliefs that personal choice is relegated to government regulation. But it is.

 

There are arguments pro- and con- with these regulations. I fall more on the pro- side (previous remarks notwithstanding). I do believe that children must be protected against unwanted abuse.

 

I think the arbitrary ages set in law at this time are a little outdated. (I'm being VERY tounge in cheek.)

 

Do I think little boys and girls should be protected from Uncle Bob who comes for a visit, gets toasted, and sneaks into their room to fuck them senseless and leave them bleeding and crying into the pillow? ABSOLUTELY!

 

Do I think a level-headed 17yo who has his shit together and is hot enough to land the college linebacker should be prevented from doing so? HELL NO. GO GIRL! (That would have ruined most of my teenage sex life!)

 

The question becomes where to set the arbitrary age. It will never be right for everyone, and prosecution needs to take that "never right" part into account.

[Guest IM_Moore]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

i will guess ua re talking about the age of consent since this site deals with sexual issues a lot. had u asked me this question even 5 years ago i would have been very firm that 16 is the correct number. most european contries are at 16 (even lower) and they have less child molestations, less teen pregnency, less teen problems than most american kids, well except england where the teen preg. is higher pro rata.

 

anywayssssssssssssssssssssssss, it is like this now i no longer feel that way. maybe it is due to my advanced years. i feel that as many pointed out one age does not fit all yet that is why we have emancipation, well in part, but it isn't practical to think we as a country will ever have a sliding scale so i would have to stick with 18. i hated that thought before but so many younger teens simply do not have the ability to make informed decisions about sex.

 

now do i think there is a problem with 2 boys 14 having sex with each other willingly not at all. i think that that is the fun of exploring sex and learning about how u feel and what feels 'right' and what doesn't. u throw an adult into that mix even at 16 and the adult, who is more experienced takes that childs fun and learning process away. not intentionally just by way of the age difference. by 18 many gay guys anyway, have experience some exposure to sex or have had some time to try to sort out their feelings. the questioning and experiements take place usually in the early to mid-teens. so as much as i don't like to acknoledge that 18 is the proper age, it really is.

[Guest RobPA]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

Is 18 the legal age everywhere in the US? It was my understanding that the age of consent was set state by state. For example, if you look up the age of consent in my state (PA) it's listed as 16. Are there different levels of consent., i.e., a 17 year old can have sex with a 20 year old, but not a 40 year old?

This has been an interesting thread. A year or so ago I met someone on chat and after weeks of daily chats we finally started discussing the possibility of meeting in person. I then learned he was only 17 so I chose not to meet him. Now this thread has me wandering if meeting him would have been not only morally wrong (at least in my mind), but perhaps criminal as well.

[Rod Hagen]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

Last time I checked out ageofconsent.com Spain was 12. CREEPY.

[Guest DCescortBOY]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

that's true, rod... BUT the European Commission is looking into standardizing that throughout the EU. it'll probably be raised to 14-16 soon.

[Guest]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

> Is 18 the legal age everywhere in the US? It was my

>understanding that the age of consent was set state by

>state. For example, if you look up the age of consent in my

>state (PA) it's listed as 16. Are there different levels of

>consent., i.e., a 17 year old can have sex with a 20 year

>old, but not a 40 year old?

 

You are right. It depends on the state. I think it's actually below 16 in a couple of states (don't ask me which ones).

[Guest]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

I have an interesting thought. Why not have it like driving? At 18, everyone would be assumed to be mature enough to make informed consent regarding sex. Below that age, the teen-ager would have to take Sex Education classes, then pass a written test (as opposed to an oral test! :+ ). Just like in my state, where if you want to drive a car/lethal weapon before 18, you have to take Driver's Education, then pass a written test. Of course, I remember we had to practice on a Driving Simulator, which we used to call the Driving Stimulator. I don't think we'd need a Sexual Simulator!

In all seriousness, though, I think that most 15-17 year-olds can make informed decisions regarding sex if they have the appropriate education. Sound reasonable?

[+ deej]

RE: If you could change the legal age

 

>Last time I checked out ageofconsent.com Spain was 12.

>CREEPY.

 

And New Mexico was 13 last time I looked.

 

CREEPY!