When an escort isn't into it...

[jackhammer91406]

I posted a few remarks last night after a long day of flying home to Los Angeles from Atlanta. I am not sure how to phrase my question because I don't know how much of my expereince in Atlanta may be my fault. As I have said in the general area, this past summer has been rough for me with a severe case of clinical depression. The Meds are a two edged sword. They make the days more bearable, but it takes more to get excited. Anyway, I met up with a guy in Atlanta that didn't seem to want to do anything except have me play with his huge cock. I had made it plain in my emails that I was a top and that I was looking for a guy who could bottom. The escort's indifference to my cock could have been caused by a number of things, but the fact is he didn't touch me once. I played with him some at his suggestion. he had videos playing and he was turned on, but I never got there until I did myself so to speak. As a client, I can't get past the sense of being played, but what does an escort do if he just isn't turned on by the client? I was more depressed when I left than when I came in. Self esteem is a tricky thing and I probably should have just passed on the whole idea of booking escorts in the first place, (which is probably what I will do now).

[Uncle Bill]

As a client, I think that you got scammed. A good escort won't have the problem that you mention, especially if you have been up-front with him about yourself and what you want beforehand. Don't give up hiring just due to this guy. I have a pretty poor self-image (primarily due to being quite overweight and not being particularly skilled at sex), but I've been able to meet some really great guys who make me feel like I'm totally desireable to them. If you'd like some recommendations for escorts in the Los Angeles area, feel free to send me a private message or email (preferably telling me what you are looking for and a little about yourself), and I'd be happy to help you. This site and message board are all about helping each other (or at least they are most of the time). Take care.

[Guest Kenny021]

Your experience is not unique to you as I have had similar experiences with SEVERAL escorts and was convinced that it was something about me that turned them off. My problem was that they just couldn't get it up. They were all very well reviewed, their personality was good and they all INSISTED that the problem wasn't with me; that they just couldn't explain it other than to say that they just couldn't explain it. Now, you feel that this escort didn't want to touch you and that you were there to only service him and that you had to take care of yourself. I don't think that this is a very professional escort. At least my "escorts" mentioned above saw to it that I got off. Naturally, if I had wanted them to top me, it would have been impossible because of their limp dick.

If this ever happens to me again, I think I will end the session, give the escort only part of their fee, explain why and send him on his way. Always make sure that you get an understanding from the escort what you are looking for. I don't think you should blame yourself for the escort's inadequacies. However, next time you decide to hire, be clear about your expectations. This I've learned from experience. I suspect many clients have had similar experiences.

I've long suspected that the escort's inability to get an erection is alot more common that anyone mentions.

[btmstudnyc]

I tend to agree with most of what is said above.

 

But, also. If you told me you were a top and you couldn't get it up, and you didn't do anything to help stimulate me...like play with my butt, or kiss me or grope me..which I love....How can you expect me to be a machine? I don't want a client like that. And If you explain to me that you are on meds or have prostate removed and such...then it also makes me aware that I have to figure out a way to make you happy. I don't need a hardon to turn me on...its just the ICING on the cake. Viagra helps a lot of clients...and I would have given him one if you thought it wasnt working out.

 

You sound like a really great guy. Try another escort and explain what your situation is and what happened before....Then if the escort says yes...You know he's going to work hard for you. If not...FUCK HIM>>>>>hehe

 

I know yungins....can get it up by just taking their clothes off. Also, some things actually make me lose my erection....(like my post of before..If someone constantly is checking it to test ITS ability.) I don't ever scam someone....be clear about what you expect to happen...otherwise..anything goes...or should I say NOTHING goes.

 

Jim

[Cooper]

Hey Jack,

I just had to tell you that you got the best Avatar going! Seriously, I tried reading your message and wanted to post some words of wisdom, but I got so distracted by the movement. Where did you find it?

[jackhammer91406]

Thanks,

I wish I could tell you. I was searching like crazy on a few gay search engines last week. Must have looked at a hundred sites or more. It wasn't what I was looking for , but the more I looked at it, the better I liked it. I wish I had marked the site because there were a bunch of them and also stuff for wallpaper as well. Nice to be noticed.

Jack

[jackhammer91406]

I appreciate your comments. I did have an erection. I tried kissing him a couple of times but he clearly wasn't into it and yes I not only played with his ass but gave him a pretty good rim job if I do say so myself. But early on when I began playing with his chest, he told me no biting. Well, I hadn't bitten, but it was the first of several parameters that were added as time went on. I could lick his ass, but no fingers, that kind of thing. The point I was trying to make is that when he says to me in his mails that he is all about making the experience one I can "take to bed with me" (his words) then he doesn't respond or begins a list of don'ts before I have done them, well, I begin to feel like he is not only not attracted to me (ok, that's his perogative) but wishes the time was up. I dunno. I just felt bad. And I wanted to feel good. Granted, how good can a guy feel when he is paying someone to be with him, but intimacy issues aside, I didn't think I was that much of a turn off.

[Guest Kevin 2]

reddnat.hpg.ig.com.br/temas/gif/gif19.gif

add www to the above address for his avatar image.

(If I did you would see his pic not the address) ;-)

[Donnie]

>they all INSISTED

>that the problem wasn't with me; that they just couldn't

>explain it other than to say that they just couldn't explain

>it.

 

Do you really think an escort is going to be honest and tell you you're not turning him on? And do you really want to know the real answer? Seems to me that part of their job is boosting your ego, if not with a hardon, then at least by being kind.

[Guest jeffOH]

I've had clients ask me if I'm as "into it" as I appear to be. Well, yes, I am, but I'm often turned on by seeing the pleasure I'm giving.

I do love getting totally lost in the moment...sex must be my religion because I often have a spiritual experience during sex. You know, that out of body feeling where you feel like you're connecting with the other person on a higher level.

 

You told the guy in advance what you were interested in and he didn't deliver. I hope you'll write a review of this guy.

 

JEFF

[email protected]

[LovesYng]

I have done it in the past, THROW THE FUCKING ESCORT OUT ON HIS ASS. I got no problem doing that, I'm not paying someone to lay there like a dead log:+ .

[Rick Munroe]

>sex must be my religion because I

>often have a spiritual experience during sex.

 

I wonder if you can get government funding as a faith-based charity.

[nate_sf]

There are times when an escort isn't in to it, which may not have anything to do with the client, such as he just had a fight with his boyfriend, or had scheduled too many appointments that day -- things that have nothing to do with you. However, if the escort is professional, he'll take responsibility for his actions (or lack of) and tell you what's going on, or at least end the session without taking a fee.

 

It sounds like this guy didn't fit this profile, though. There are guys that go into this business for the wrong reasons and just suck at it (and not in a good way!!). I think you're best bet, whether it's with an escort or a trick, is that if it's just not happening, cut your losses and get out, or throw him out, and tell him why, specifically. It can be hard, but will make you feel a hell of a lot better in the end.

[btmstudnyc]

Granted, how good can a guy feel when he is paying

>someone to be with him, but intimacy issues aside, I didn't

>think I was that much of a turn off.

 

I'm sorry to hear about the whole story...but this particular comment above bothered me a little. There are a lot of people that pay for sex...including escorts. I have done it when I just wanted someone to take care of me and I wasnt into all the mating rituals and possible rejections. Yes....even hot tottie escorts get turned down.

 

Shopping around can be fun. But sometimes what you buy breaks down faster than you expected....We all hate that...but it doesnt stop me for wanting to go shopping again....

 

hehe

 

Jim

[Guest dstud4hire]

Hmm, I like your style Nate. you cut through the BS and make it easier that way. Say what's on your mind. Great advice you gave!

 

Only once did I ever have a feeling that I just didn't meet a clients needs. I could just feel it. I just wasn't into the role playing mode that night. Though I got hard and came, I knew I wasn't giving it my all.....it had nothing to do with the cklient, it was all me...I had just signed on my first house that day, and was so excited that all I did was pack my old house. I was soooooo tired and waaaay too preoccupied in thought. I should have def. cancelled, but I didn't.

 

The next day I wrote an email to apologize. He was genuinely shocked and suprised,. and it made all the difference in the world. I will NEVER let that happen again! Nothing like a lesson learned....

[jackhammer91406]

First, let me thank all of the guys who responded to my post.

I received a number of private messages as well as the great advice posted here and I really appreciate it guys. It's encouraging to me to find that there are remedies to a situation like this. I don't have to take all the blame myself. I just never considered that walking out was an option because I had booked the appointment so felt obligated to pay him for his time. I wanted to address one remark I made that might have caused offense and certainly none was intended. When I said how good can a guy feel when he is paying for someone to be with him, I was really just feeling sorry for myself I guess and should have been more careful. Anyone who might have been offended, please forgive me. To all of the escorts who responded encouraging me to continue to "shop" , thanks. To all of the clients who gave recommendations for escorts , thanks. All I can say is , it feels comfortable for me here at this board.

jack

[Guest ncm2169]

Fucking LAUGH OUT LOUD!! Bingo. Zap. Skewer. }(

 

Go get 'em, Rick. :+