FrankR

I have had two experiences with guys that I believe are recent immigrants. Both were for massages and both looked like their pics. Only one appeared to be trained but both stuck around for the full 90 minutes. There was no erotic element to either appointment though from his social media the one guy is clearly gay - the other did not have social media and I got the sense he was straight. Neither spoke English and we did not get into their living arrangements - both indicated they traveling into the city from an outer burrough. Both charged less than the standard rate for my city for a massage but I paid the standard rate and tip. The SayHi app is great for those that do not speak Spanish. They both preferred Whatsapp for communication post introductions on Adam4Adam.

Financially speaking I am definitely better off. Funny enough, my current average monthly expenses are only up 2% from 2019. I’ve never been a big spender - the bulk of my increased net income since 2019 has gone into investments.

We all agree - seeking needs a different approach. Rentmen may be a better fit for most that do not have the time or desire to cultivate a friend with benefits arrangement. Others prefer the seeking route. You do you.

Have had the same experience. Glutes are one of the largest muscles in the body. If not given due attention, I am not getting value for my money and wont repeat. There is also the opposite problem…they get to the glutes and the massage stops there as things escalate to erotic. Also not what I am looking for to be honest.

From experience, the best advice I can give you is to communicate and set boundaries. Make sure they know the money will run out on X date if they keep going at this pace. Make sure they know you will not be supporting them further when that happens. Give them the contact details of a financial councilor who can help them budget. You may be tempted to “help”, but enabling isnt helping. Set boundaries and stick to it. You may need to start growing a thick skin. I had to. 🙈

I have only been in the game, so to speak, for about 10 years. My total expenditure is far lower than your estimate - not gonna give you the exact number but lets just say if I had it piled up today, I could be driving a new Porsche tomorrow. Interesting enough, I slowed down significantly during Covid and have not returned to my pre-Covid pace as of yet. Should I add that to my goals for 2024?? 😋

Is it somebody you can recommend? If so, please provide a link to a thread or profile… Of course there are no guarantees, but a recommendation may be a good start.

The article doesnt dive very deep. It appears the increase is driven by rent and housing costs based on analysis I reviewed. That being said, most of the people I talk to are feeling better about the economy and the progress made in keeping inflation in check…but they do expect another increase in Fed rates. 🤷‍♂️

Guys strutting around in leather, trying to get laid. It’s not complicated.

You do get it. As you said: most gay men. The world isnt a black and white place - its shades of gray and all colors of the rainbow. He provides a great therapeutic massage. And maybe a bit more if the chemistry is right. If that’s not your thing, that is fine then avoid him - but for others who arent looking for the type of home run you are after, it is exactly what they are looking for. You do you.

The whole thing is (still) just weird. Call me nuts, but from the numbers mentioned in the article it is hard to understand how she got herself into this position. https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/columnist/brennan/2024/01/06/mary-lou-retton-nearly-half-million-dollars-donations-how-spent/72132567007/

No debt. I use my cards for the benefits, but pay them off monthly.

I enjoy your annual tradition…however I think it is time to add more to it. Specifically, an annual audit of all your…assets…may be appropriate! 😉

He sounds like a nice guy and treats you like a valued client. I am a business professional and as I get to know my clients better, we often exchange details at a personal level. But I never confuse our friendly interaction as “friendship” - we are friendly, but it is a professional relationship where they pay me for my services. I would recommend that you be super sure that it is friendship and not just a friendly situation. Dont get carried away and emotionally involved - it is easy to make the wrong determination and that can end up being hurtful to both of you. Good luck!

Be very clear about your expectations. He tends to over promise. I wont repeat - we miscommunicated and it was blamed on lack of language skills.

I use the Pi app and its ability to anticipate my follow up “why” question is rather good. It is also quite sassy which I find delightful.

Ha!

I am a big fan of Daniel Radcliffe. He was lucky in the sense that his parents were financially savvy and took great care of his growing Harry Potter income stream despite his going through a rough time with substance abuse. I remember reading a few features (one from Cosmopolitan comes to mind) about how frugal he actually is. He donates a lot of dough - including to the Trevor Project, one if my personal favorite charities.

Think twice. You are setting yourself up for a lot of financial pain and drama. Identity theft seems to be the most common outcome - I speak from experience in helping friends recover from such exploits. If you choose to procees - visit rentmen and seeking and look for guys that are into that.

He’s heading to NYC at the end of November. Now is your chance. 🤓

Oh, you noticed - it’s his niche. He enjoys it. Don’t you @pubic_assistance? 😋 Example: https://www.companyofmen.org/topic/145976-armymike-in-nyc/#comment-2189380

Whenever I see the word “morbid” in their profile text I know they are using google translate from Spanish to English… (morboso).

If my economy was in as much trouble as the Chinese economy appears to be, I would be looking to gain as much good will from key trading partners as possible. https://www.ft.com/content/4671126e-9d0a-433b-948e-4c5631ab3b7c (Pay wall)

It’s not. You will notice how much my fellow members like to complain. Rentmen gets just as many complaints. The other day I read somebody said Rentmasseur is basically soft porn or something. I’ve met some really fun people on A4A - its just like any other platform…imperfect. But I am glad to have all of them, especially after what happened to rentboy etc.

It is a question of consent. Just because I let you touch my butt or dick does not mean I give you consent to stick your dick into my butt. Yes, you need actual consent every step of the way.