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Stella Stevens was in dire need of a paycheck when Playboy came calling. The actress, who was groomed to be the next Marilyn Monroe before she made her own mark during the final years of Hollywood’s golden era, died in 2023 at age 84. She’s now the subject of a new documentary by her son Andrew Stevens, “Stella Stevens: The Last Starlet.” It features commentary by Quentin Tarantino and Vivica A. Fox, among others. In the film, viewers learn how Stevens, who had a young son to feed, took an offer to pose nude for the magazine. It cemented her role as a sought-after screen siren, but it came at a price. “She was alone in Hollywood, barely 18 years [and] broke with no source of income,” Andrew told Fox News Digital. “A photographer and his wife came to her, and they said, ‘We shoot for this magazine called Playboy, and we’ll pay you $5,000 if you do a layout.’ Stella said, ‘It was a job, and I needed a job. I had a child to support. I was a single person living in LA and I didn’t know anyone. So I took the work.’” Before stripping down, Stevens was discovered at a department store in Memphis. She was flown to Hollywood for a screen test and then signed a three-year contract with 20th Century Fox. While Stevens filmed three movies in six months, she was dropped by the studio over a work card technicality. Despite the $5,000 offer, Stevens said Playboy founder Hugh Hefner told her after the racy shoot that he would only pay her half. To earn the rest, she had to work as a hostess at one of his clubs. “She’s quoted as saying, ‘I told him to shove it, I will not,’” said Andrew. Stevens signed a new contract with Paramount. She scored a co-starring role in “Li’l Abner” as Appassionata Von Climax. She was determined to get her photos back before they went to print. “She called Hugh Hefner and said, ‘I have this big Hollywood movie now… please don’t publish the photos. I’ll buy them back from you,’” said Andrew. “He said, ‘Oh no, you have a contract. We’re using them.’ So, [Playboy] exploited ‘Li’l Abner,’ which takes place in a mythical place called Dogpatch. They titled her photos ‘Dogpatch Playmate.’” “The irony is, after being dropped from 20th Century Fox, she won a Golden Globe as Best Newcomer of the Year in 1960 when Marilyn also won a Golden Globe for Best Actress,” Andrew shared. “And [Marilyn won] for the studio that had just dropped [my mother’s] contract.” Stevens felt that being a sex symbol was a “double-edged sword,” said Andrew. “On one hand, she appreciated that she got more attention in the Hollywood community,” he explained. “Everyone wanted to meet her… [But] the old Hollywood studio system at that time was a very male-dominated, misogynistic community. And the casting couch was very real. And as [film critic] Leonard Maltin is quoted as saying [in the film], ‘There was a whole town run by early day Harvey Weinsteins.’” “In some ways, [being a sex symbol] gave her a career boost,” said Andrew. “But on the flip side, she’s quoted as saying it killed doing anything decent or legitimate after that. People wouldn’t take her seriously because of this sexpot moniker that she was given. So, the more weighty and meaty dramatic roles were not as forthcoming as the more frivolous post-Marilyn Monroe-type roles.” Stevens was determined to be taken seriously as an actress. According to the documentary, Stevens had zero desire to appear alongside Elvis Presley in 1962’s “Girls! Girls! Girls!”. “The studio was pushing her to do it,” Andrew explained. “At the time, very few actors had any say over what the studio assigned them to do… Stella, quite outspokenly, said, ‘I don’t want to be the girl that Elvis Presley leaves for another girl. That’s not what I have in mind for my career.’” “She had just finished a film called ‘Too Late Blues,’ directed by John Cassavetes, starring Bobby Darin,” Andrew pointed out. “It was this… dramatic piece. That’s the kind of work she was interested in doing. Not some frivolous fluff piece, although Elvis movies were very popular at the time. [But] nobody took him seriously as an actor, and nobody took them seriously.” “She was having her own struggles with trying to be taken seriously after having posed in Playboy.” While Stevens had “great respect” for Presley, she urged the studio not to cast her in the film. Stevens only agreed to do it after she was promised to play opposite Montgomery Clift in her next movie. It never happened. Stevens detested the Presley flick and could never bring herself to watch it. There was one person who believed in Stevens’ talent – Jerry Lewis. The comic chose her to play his love interest in 1963’s “The Nutty Professor.” “Stella and Jerry Lewis loved each other,” said Andrew. “They had such a great collaborative working relationship. When Jerry got the green light to shoot ‘The Nutty Professor’ at Paramount, he said, ‘I want the most beautiful girl you have under contract.’ And I think he named the role Stella Purdy after Stella. They just had a lovely relationship.” “I have fond memories of knowing Jerry Lewis and being on the set, watching him direct,” Andrew recalled. “… I think he was a great mentor for Stella.” Growing up, Andrew admitted that his relationship with Stevens was complicated. She dropped out of high school at 15 to marry Andrew’s father, Herman Stephens. The couple divorced in 1956, and she took Andrew to California, where she could pursue an acting career. His father and grandfather later showed up at her home to take him back to Memphis, resulting in an ugly custody battle. “The unfortunate thing about both of them is that they were babies having babies,” Andrew reflected about his parents. “My mother was 16 and my father was 18 when I was born. “My father barely graduated from high school. My mother had to quit high school to stay home and take care of me. She went to school at night to get a GED to be able to then go to Memphis State University… But neither one, quite honestly, was really equipped to take care of a child.” “… My preference would always have been to be in Memphis with my friends and the rest of my family,” Andrew admitted. “I certainly don’t begrudge my mother from wanting her child. But quite frankly, neither of my parents had the goods to be able to raise a kid.” While mother and son had “multiple periods of estrangement,” they bonded on set. She directed the 1989 film “The Ranch,” which starred Andrew. He later directed her in 1991’s “The Terror Within II.” Stevens worked steadily in television in the 1970s and ’80s, appearing in “Wonder Woman,” “Hart to Hart,” “The Love Boat” and “Night Court,” just to name a few. She stayed busy until she could no longer work due to Alzheimer’s disease. To Stevens’ dismay, his mother wasn’t included in the Academy Awards’ annual “In Memoriam” segment, and she never received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. “My mother deserved better,” said Andrew. “Even though my life with her was tumultuous and complex and not always warm and fuzzy, time and distance have given me a new perspective on the impact she had.”

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@pubic_assistance is a connoisseur of that classic bit of cuisine. 😇 😁 😋 🤣

My sister: Is Marie Osmond sending paper roses? Me: No, but she's catering the shiva calls with products from Nutrisystem

Legendary singer Wayne Osmond has died at 73.

Not immediately. Jaclyn Smith's hubby at the time was the show's narrator, so (naturally) they recast him in the role. In 1971, Roger Davis narrated the voiceover theme sequence for the western series Alias Smith and Jones, starring Pete Duel as Hannibal Heyes/Joshua Smith and Ben Murphy as Jedidiah "Kid" Curry/Thaddeus Jones. He also appeared in one of the episodes ("Smiler with a Gun") as slick gunfighter Danny Bilson. Bilson has the distinction of being the only character kind-hearted Kid Curry was ever driven to kill during the series. When Pete Duel committed suicide at the end of 1971, Davis replaced him as Hannibal Heyes. However, after Davis completed just 17 episodes, it was clear the show would not achieve the same level of popularity it had with Pete Duel. The series ended in 1973 when competition from the popular Flip Wilson Show siphoned the show's ratings.

Thanks a lot for the spoiler alert.

I keep not getting around to getting the latest booster.

Mitch Modell, the former CEO of the famed New York sporting goods chain that went belly-up four years ago, wants to buy bankrupt retailers Party City and Big Lots. Modell — whose family-run company featured the buzzy “Gotta go to Mo’s” jingle — is looking to raise $1 billion to bid to throw a financial lifeline to the flailing businesses, he told The Post on Monday. Party City and Big Lots, which both filed for Chapter 11 protection in recent months, operate a combined 1,600 stores and employ a total of 33,000 workers. Modell, 70, said he was at President-elect Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort on Dec. 19 when he got the idea to buy the legacy retailers and put his sons, Matthew, 23 and Maxwell, 22, in charge as co-presidents of the new company, he told The Post. He has lined up a veteran team of executives to evaluate a possible deal — including Larry Meyer, former chief executive of Forever 21 and Uniqlo, and Demos Parneros, ex-CEO of Barnes & Noble. “Our goal is to save 33,000 jobs,” Modell told The Post, adding that he is not putting in any of his own money. Modell, whose family founded the company more than 130 years ago, believes he can revive Big Lots and Party City by offering largely the kind of merchandise his stores sold before filing for bankruptcy protection in 2020. He would keep the retail brand names but get rid of the bulky furniture Big Lots is known for, while Party City would sell footwear and other sports apparel in addition to its core party supplies business. To provide rock bottom prices, he intends to turn to inexpensive foreign manufacturing from Source One Global, which has factories in China, Mexico and India. “Our sourcing capability is the difference maker,” he boasted, adding that he didn’t have this relationship with Source One Global when he was running Modell’s. New Jersey-based Party City filed for bankruptcy on Dec. 20 for the second time in two years. Ohio-based Big Lots filed for bankruptcy in September. Over the weekend, Big Lots struck a $490 million deal with Gordon Brothers Retail Partners and Variety Wholesalers that would save up to 400 stores. A bankruptcy hearing scheduled for Monday was adjourned for one day, according to court records. Modell said he spoke with representatives of Gordon Brothers informing them that “I’m not going away and we want to be your partners.” Big Lots reaches deal to keep hundreds of stores open, save jobs

Dear Abby: I am a widow of two decades who has raised a family in an old historic home in a small island town. In the course of renovating and maintaining the home, a father-and-son electrician team have been like family. During the past year or so, the dad, who is in his late 70s (older than I am) has started making unwanted romantic overtures in the form of suggestive or lovey-dovey texts, emails, phone calls, invitations to lunch or cocktails and professions of having harbored “secret fantasies” while working for me throughout the years. What’s even worse is that his romantic partner of decades is in a mid-range stage of dementia. I find this annoying and insulting, and I have politely discouraged or tried to deflect his overtures with humor. Fortunately, he does not live on the island, but if he sees my car in town, he begs me to meet up for a “quick hug.” Electricians of his caliber are rare, and I really can’t afford to lose him. His moonlighting rates have always been a “friends and family” deal. His son has taken a job with a big outfit and is rarely available. How do I pull the plug on the dad’s amorous advances, without him blowing a fuse? — Extinguished in Maine Dear Extinguished: Tell this man in plain English that you think he is a terrific friend, but you are morally opposed to involving yourself romantically with anyone whose partner is ill. He needs to hear it. JEEZ, YOU IDIOT, DROP TROU AND GET EVEN BETTER RATES IN THE FUTURE! Dear Abby: My mom and two sisters constantly complain about their physical ailments. None of them has been evaluated or diagnosed by a physician. They have tried repeatedly to treat themselves with outdated advice and cure-alls that aren’t backed by scientific information. I have tried to express to them the importance of proper nutrition and resistance training, since building and keeping muscle is so important as we age. Abby, I’m no expert, but I have transformed my body and my life with those simple rules. My mom and sisters are so defensive and dismissive of my advice, I’ve all but given up trying to talk to them. If they won’t at least try something new to feel better, how can I deal with their constant complaining? Do I keep suggesting the same things to them? Do I ignore their complaints? — Family Helper in California Dear Helper: Because trying to guide your mother and your sisters toward a healthier lifestyle hasn’t worked and has become a source of frustration for you, stop trying to help. They have tuned you out, and your efforts are wasted. A step in the right direction would be to ignore their complaints and change the subject rather than give them advice they won’t follow. BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF SO THEY DON’T WIND UP GOING TO PRISON FOR DOING IT TO YOU BECAUSE YOU ANNOY THEM CONSTANTLY.

my heart bleeds (if that were literal, I'd have to calculate whether I could afford to get it treated) UnitedHealth Group CEO quietly telling execs company will hit financial records

FBI warns leagues about organized theft groups targeting athletes I know it's morally and legally wrong, but considering that I've had to decide which tests to get that my doctor wants me to have and which specialist to see that he recommends because I can't afford all the copays (the first thing they teach in medical school is "assume all your patients are upper middle class so you never have to waste any time bothering to ask if they can afford what you are going to recommend") it's hard for me to have any reaction other than "my heart bleeds..." And don't even get me started on the term "pain management", which is Latin for "suck it up and learn to live with it unless you can sell a kidney to afford physical therapy".

You get to borrow a cup of sugar anytime you want to

The victim in a Queens cold case homicide has finally been identified more than three decades after her body was discovered in a grassy area along the Cross Island Expressway near Cambria Heights in August 1991, Queens District Attorney Melinda Katz announced Monday. The Cold Case Unit currently has 47 homicide victims who have yet to be identified. Earlier this year, U.S. Rep. Grace Meng secured a half-million dollar grant for advanced DNA testing and genealogical investigations by the Queens DA’s Cold Case Unit, which will be used to obtain such answers for other families. “As I have said, it is never too late for justice, and the $500,000 I secured for the DA’s Cold Case Unit will go a long way towards investigating and prosecuting local cold cases and providing answers and closure for families,” said Meng. Since then, the Cold Case Unit has initiated genealogy investigations into 14 cases involving unidentified human remains.

Used to be sad, Used to be shy, The funniest thing, the saddest part Is I never knew why. Kicking myself for nothing was my favorite sport. I had to get out and start enjoying 'cause life's too short... There's a new girl in town and she's feeling GOOD- Got a smile, got a song For the neighborhood. Things are great when you stand on your own 2 feet And this girl's here to say With some luck and love Life's gonna be So SWEE-EET!

from tonight’s MLB Trade Rumors chat: Jays Fan Does no one want the Jays money, or are we simply being used as leverage and not actually in on these Free Agents? Either way, should i abandon baseball and live at the bottom of the sea? Mark P There will be no accusations Just friendly crustaceans under the seaaaaaaa Also, wouldn’t it be living at the bottom of Lake Ontario, in this context? Anyway, actual answer….as noted earlier, the Jays probably aren’t many players’ top choice right now. A free agent will listen to what they offer since why not, but if a more clear-cut contender can at least come close on money, the Blue Jays don’t have much leverage WHY NOT? EACH OPTION HAS EQUAL DEGREES OF CULTURE & SOPHISTICATION… Dear Abby: A year ago, I found out my husband has been cheating on me with multiple women for more than a decade and kept two of his conquests for that entire time. He also sent all our savings to his girlfriends in another country. Because we have two disabled adult children and one neurotypical adult child, I decided to stay in the marriage. A year later, I’m still struggling. In fact, I feel worse. I barely sleep and have developed severe anxiety. I have no one to talk to about this because I’m embarrassed and humiliated by what he’s done to our family. To shield my children, since they would suffer needlessly if they knew about his infidelity, I put on a facade and pretend everything is OK. I am desperate for sleep, but all I do is cry and wander around my house at night. My husband places all the blame on me, which leaves me feeling so betrayed and hurt that I don’t know what to do. What are the steps I need to take to put this behind me and move forward without having to replay it in my head all the time? — Rocked World in California Dear Rocked World: Your first step should be to speak to your physician about what has been going on, and then to ask for a referral to a licensed mental health professional. It is important you have someone to talk to because remaining silent is making you sick. A GUN DEALER. Speaking the truth will not reflect badly on you THOUGH BEING A DOORMAT KINDA DOES. Your children have nothing to gain by being kept in the dark. When your husband emptied your bank account, he was hurting them financially as well as you. Once you are emotionally stronger, consult a lawyer AN INSTRUCTOR AT A SHOOTING RANGE and take your cues from that person about how to protect yourself and your children. Dear Abby: My mom and I have an extremely difficult relationship. She wants to treat me like a child, even though I’m 66. My husband and I do a lot of things for her and her husband, as they’re in their mid-80s. Thanksgiving was a disaster, and we no longer want to spend any holidays with them. She asks everyone but me why I’m mad at her. When I tried to explain to her in a letter how her actions affect me, she got defensive and called it “hateful.” I don’t like confrontations. I’m like a deer in headlights and can’t think of anything to say to her. How can I let her know we plan to spend our holidays alone now, without her feeling like we hate her? — Alone in the South Dear Alone: I see no reason NOT to tell your mother you will spend no more holidays with her and her husband BECAUSE SHE’S A BITCH WHO IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO SUGARCOAT THINGS. If she asks, say you have made “other plans” and won’t be available BECAUSE SHE’S A BITCH WHO IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE AROUND. If she accuses you of hating her or being mad at her, tell her for the reasons stated IN YOUR LETTER, it has become too stressful BECAUSE SHE’S A BITCH WHO IS NOT WORTH THE EFFORT TO BE POLITE TO. If your mother complains to the rest of the relatives, as she probably will, explain your reasons for skipping the stress-filled holidays and tell them they can explain it to her because every time you have tried, she tunes you out BECAUSE SHE’S A BITCH WHOM YOU HAVE DECIDED IS NO LONGER WORTH THE EFFORT TO HAVE ANYTHING MORE THAN A SUPERFICIAL RELATIONSHIP WITH.

Jimmy Carter has died. He was 100. RIP “I think it's very important for all of the students ... to remember the importance of peace, human rights, and love for one another, and the principles that never change in our lives. Rosalynn and I and our entire family thank you from the bottom of our hearts.”

So how does she get the coupon? It would really help, as I'm sure she's in a higher income bracket than I am.

More than 400 fur seal pups spotted off San Francisco coast in ‘truly remarkable’ comeback Over 400 fur seal pups were found resting in an inlet at the Farallon Islands National Wildlife Refuge off the coast of San Francisco, CA.

I think so many people cheered about this because the wealth gap in this nation has become so nauseating (even more so than ever) and it is maddening to see how much some people make and waste. Perhaps that is why these wealthy people may be facing the start of an epidemic: NBA All-Star becomes latest athlete to have home burglarized with $30K in jewelry taken Luka Doncic has been added to the growing list of professional athletes who recently have been burglary victims at their homes.

Walmart driver caught masturbating in woman’s driveway after delivering her groceries service with a smile... I wonder if he got a big tip

AN APARTMENT WITH A TERRACE AND A VIEW:

A discarded slice of birthday cake has unexpectedly sparked outrage among a group of friends. In a post on Reddit’s “Am I the A——” forum, a 41-year-old man explained that a “weird” conflict escalated after he accepted a slice of coconut cake a woman named, Amy, 30, baked for the birthday boy’s party. “After the relevant party traditions of singing the birthday song, and the hip-hip-hooraying that happens after the birthday song here in Australia, I went back to talking to one of my friends when Amy came up to me and the other friend with 2 plates of cake and offered them to my friend and I,” he wrote. “We both said ‘yes,’ thanked her, and then she made a really odd face and walked away,” he continued. “My friend and I both said it was weird, and went back to chatting. I ate some of the cake and it had desiccated coconut inside it, which I don’t particularly like, so after a couple of bites, I ignored it and then chucked it out when the party ended about an hour or so later.” The next morning, the man paid the price for trashing the coconut slice when he woke up to a series of angry texts from Amy’s partner, Steven, 30. He was told that Amy had spent the entire night crying and complaining about not having had the opportunity to taste the cake that she baked. Having only cut eight slices because she knew the man doesn’t eat coconut, Amy felt that it was spiteful that he took a slice of cake just to later throw it away. “I replied, ‘Why did she even offer me any cake if she knew there was coconut inside?'” the man wrote. “Steven said that she did it to be polite and not leave me out and that I was an a—— for taking her slice and throwing it away,” he said. Related: Man Refuses to Share Certain Snacks with His Wife — Causing Tension in Their Marriage: ‘I Designate Food as Mine’ The man confessed to feeling uneasy after the heated exchange as other people who had attended the party were also giving him the cold shoulder. “I forwarded the message to my other friends that were there, and most of them have left me on read so far, except one who responded with a thumbs down emoji, and another who hasn’t seen it yet (as of this writing),” the man said. “The fact that no one’s responding to me is making me worry that I might have been the a—— here.” Redditors replied in the comment section saying it would have been rude for him to decline the cake. “What a bizarre situation. You cut enough cake for everyone there (including yourself), and don’t hand cake to people if you’re relying on them turning it down so you can eat it yourself. You did the right thing by accepting it, it would have been more rude to decline,” one user wrote. The man responded to the user’s comment saying, “I mean, she expected me to decline, so was there just no winning here?” Another user responded, “Then she would have cried that you refused the cake. She sounds like a drama queen. If your friends think you are the AH here, they aren’t friends. You did nothing wrong. If she knows you don’t like coconut, then she should have told you it had coconut in it.” BAKE HER AN “I’M SORRY” CAKE WITH “SPECIAL” ALMOND FLAVORING… DEAR ABBY: My husband took me on a trip for my birthday this year, only he didn’t prepare for anything other than some sightseeing events. He didn’t help plan for camping, didn’t financially plan well for souvenirs or if we wanted to eat out, and had a crappy attitude the entire time. We got into an argument at almost every event we went to because he either disagreed with my preferences or pushed back at my calling him out for pouting. I’m upset because this was supposed to have been a “makeup” trip from him for ruining my birthday years prior, and for pretty awful fights we were having leading up to my birthday. I had tried to back out, but he convinced me to go. My actual birthday was the day after we got home. He ignored me the entire day, and we got into another argument. We had a few friends over, but overall, I was pretty upset and felt unloved by him. When I addressed it the next day, he told me no one should get a “birthday week” and called me ungrateful and unappreciative of his efforts. Am I wrong for being upset? This was supposed to be his birthday gift to me, but it felt more like I took him on a trip he didn’t even want to be on. –– BIRTHDAY GIRL IN MICHIGAN DEAR GIRL: It is possible your expectations surrounding your birthdays may be, in your husband’s opinion, grandiose. Have you two been arguing about more subjects than birthday celebrations, and if so, for how long. speaking safely from the sidelines in order to avoid the crossfire, I suggest you ask your doctor (or health insurance company) to recommend some licensed marriage and family counselors. WHY ARE THE TWO OF YOU STILL TOGETHER? YOU’RE A TRANSACTIONAL BITCH WHO’LL NEVER BE SATISFIED WITH HIM AND HE’S A THOUGHTLESS OAF WHO CAN DO BETTER THAN YOU. DEAR ABBY: I have a problem with my daughter-in-law. I know she loves me, but I don’t think she likes me. An example: Yesterday, I met her and my son at my granddaughter’s dance recital. When I entered and sat down next to them, she barely looked up from her phone, yet when another mother arrived, she leapt up and chatted for minutes. This kind of thing happens often. When we are alone together, she chats with me, but if someone else is in the group, it’s like I’m not even there. I have no other complaints about her. She is a terrific mom and partner to my son. Should I talk to her about this? How do I bring it up without making her defensive? — IGNORED IN CALIFORNIA DEAR IGNORED: I don’t doubt that your daughter-in-law loves you. However, she may be so comfortable around you that she’s treating you like family … in other words, taking you for granted. She jumps up when she sees her contemporaries because she doesn’t see them as often as she sees you, and they may have fresh news to talk about WHILE YOU ARE DULL AS DISHWATER. Be grateful that when you are alone you communicate well EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE DULL AS DISHWATER. I don’t think there is anything positive to be gained by approaching her with this. DEAR ABBY: I think the world of “Celia,” my best friend of 25 years. She has been there for me through many major ups and downs in my life. She is beautiful inside and out, well-educated and works hard. Celia has been in a five-year relationship with an old friend I’ll call “Vince.” I think he is a nice guy, but not for her. He has no desire to do better in life, doesn’t provide for her and lives off her money. Vince barely works, and his time is spent out and about enjoying himself while Celia works two, sometimes three, jobs. Now Celia’s physical health is suffering, and so is her mental health. Vince has a kid who sometimes stays over, and when they run out of money, Celia asks me to help cover them. She sees nothing wrong in this and wants to have a child of her own with him. I have had many talks with Celia, but they go nowhere. I’ve helped with money a few times and she always pays me back. But recently, after she asked me for money for food for the three of them, I learned they went to the movies instead. Now I feel used. This is just not OK. I no longer want to give her money to cover a grown man’s responsibility. I’m not sure how to tell her I can no longer help out with money. — STRAINED FRIENDSHIP DEAR STRAINED: Celia may be well-educated, but it appears she IS A MORON WHO has serious self-esteem issues, little common sense and a parasite for a boyfriend. That she would consider having a child with Vince, a man who can’t support himself or the child he already has, is coconuts! Tell your beautiful friend that while you care for her, SHE IS A MORON WHO you will no longer subsidize the three of them, and using your money to pay for movie tickets was the last straw. Then don’t relent AND FIND A FRIEND WHO ISN’T A MORON. DEAR ABBY: I taught tennis lessons at a private club for 41 years. Then came the pandemic. I was furloughed and not asked to return to work. I wasn’t given the usual parting acknowledgement that previous employees received — no goodbyes, no thank yous. In the successive years, I have asked for a free membership as a gift for my years of service. So far, the answer is “no.” Is my request valid? Should I continue asking? SURE, IF YOU WANT TO PROVE YOU’RE A MORON LIKE CELIA— SERVING FAIRNESS IN ILLINOIS DEAR SERVING: You didn’t mention how many times you have asked for the membership as a gift for your years of service, but if it has been more than once, stop asking because it isn’t going to happen. A furlough is defined as a temporary layoff for a specified period of time. Employees retain their jobs and benefits but do not get paid during that period. If this is what your separation from that private club was called, it may be time to speak to an attorney about how you were treated FIND OUT THE HOME ADDRESSES OF THE CLUB MANAGEMENT AND MEMBERSHIP COMMITEE AND… Dear Abby: My spouse and I (both women) have been together for 25 years. For half of them, we lived in the Middle East. We met while working as health care expatriates. My spouse is from South Africa and was raised very differently than I was. When we finally returned to the U.S., we bought a house in a southern state where two of my brothers live. Over time, my spouse let me know she didn’t want them to stay in our house when they came to visit. She preferred they stay in a hotel. She said she was disgusted that they might not shower before bed, and that our cats would be disturbed by their presence. I told her I thought her comments were rude, and I reminded her that sheets are always washed after visitors leave. This has caused a lot of conflict in our relationship, and I’m not sure I can go on alienating and hurting my family by not welcoming them in my home. I love my spouse, but I love my family and friends too, and I want them to feel welcome. I am torn about what to do. — Pulled in Two Dear Pulled: I don’t know what your spouse has against having your brothers as houseguests, but SHE IS A BITCH AND her “reasons” for wanting them to stay in a hotel are excuses rather than reasons. As you stated, the sheets are washed and changed after guests leave. And cats are adaptable creatures. An alternative might be for your spouse to leave when your relatives come to visit, or for you to visit them instead AND FOR YOU TO CHANGE THE LOCKS WHILE SHE’S GONE. Dear Abby: My sister passed away 11 months ago, just one month after a diagnosis of ovarian cancer. I loved her and miss her dearly. She told her husband and me that she wanted me to have specific belongings and her annuity that was in her name, but she did not have a will. My brother-in-law has not given me anything that she requested be given to me. I haven’t asked why, but I feel if I don’t ask, he’ll never give me an explanation. I realize that since she didn’t have a will, he’s not legally obligated to give me anything. It’s really about trust, honesty and fulfilling her spoken wishes, but I guess he doesn’t view it that way. I feel totally disrespected. Should I never ask him why and distance myself from him? — Disappointed in Pennsylvania Dear Disappointed: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your sister. By ignoring her wishes, her husband isn’t disrespecting you, he is disrespecting HER. It’s a shame your sister didn’t have her wishes in writing, but she didn’t, and you will have to accept it. Since you feel you need answers, ask him why he hasn’t followed through on what your sister wanted. Depending upon his answer, decide whether to distance yourself OR KILL HIM then. Dear Abby: When my son got married in 2003, we had many good times with him and his wife. Things have changed now that we have cellphones. It’s nearly impossible to have a relationship with her because when they come to our home, she’s always on her phone! My son talks to his dad, and I’m left sitting there wondering what I should do. Would you say anything to your daughter-in-law about this? She immediately gets on the phone when she arrives and stays on it most of the time. It wasn’t like this when cellphones weren’t as prolific. It hurts my feelings that she comes all the way to my house only to socialize with her Facebook friends and not us, because we rarely see them. Should I speak up? I don’t want to start trouble and I don’t want to isolate them. I love them, but I think it’s rude that she’s on her phone the whole time they’re here. It makes me feel like I’m not good enough for her to talk to me. I have two other daughters-in-law who may get on their phones occasionally, but not like this one. — Off the Phone in Kentucky Dear Off: Of course what your daughter-in-law is doing is rude. It is also insensitive. It won’t stop unless you and your husband say something KILL THE BITCH. When you do, do not couch your message in terms of being “rude.” Instead, tell her it hurts your feelings and gives you the impression that she doesn’t value your company as much as you do hers. It also impedes high-quality visiting. If you express it this way, it may make her less defensive, because it is the truth. Dear Abby: My fiance and I have been together for many years. I have never really liked his mother — for valid reasons. She belittles and is disrespectful to her son. The last straw was when she came by two months ago and made a derogatory comment about him to me. (He was not present.) It was false, and I called her out on it. She, of course, had no rebuttal. She is negative even in her personal life and often lies. I talked to my fiance about this, and he does address the issues with her, but not in a way that makes her understand she must either respect him or risk no longer having a relationship with him. She uses others, is two-faced and rarely bathes. I am considering breaking off our engagement at this point. I’m tired of this woman’s lack of respect. Should I walk away from this relationship? — DISGUSTED AND APPALLED IN THE EAST DEAR DISGUSTED: If your tolerance level has reached its limit, you may have to walk away KILL THE BITCH. However, I do not think you should give your fiance an ultimatum in which he must decide between you and his mother. As obnoxious and odiferous as she is, she is still his mother. I do think you should suggest that he talk with a licensed psychotherapist about his relationship with her. If it is as unhealthy as you have described, he might then, on his own, decide to distance himself from her KILL THE BITCH. Dear Abby: For the third time in my life, I am being shunned by long-term friends. BOY, YOU MUST REALLY BE A PILL! Over the years, I have expended a great deal of time and effort to stay in touch with them. Back when we lived in the same places, we were very close. Ultimately, I moved away but always stayed in touch. These friendships have spanned decades and, since we rarely see each other, I can’t understand what might have happened to precipitate this. I know everyone has issues, but they no longer respond, and I’m extremely hurt by it. It takes only seconds to acknowledge a text or email. Certainly, I’d be there for them in any way I could if they were having difficulties. I’d like to tell them off, but I know it would resolve nothing, although it might be nice to get it off my chest. I’m finding it hard to let this go. What do you think I might do? WHO KNOWS OR CARES, YOU OLD PILL! (or was that callous?) It’s hard to believe they could be so callous. WHY? IT’S EASY BECAUSE YOU'RE AN OLD PILL! — Let Down in Florida Dear Let Down: Friendships don’t always last forever. Sometimes ties that bind people together start to fray. Geographical distance only adds to that. If I thought telling these people off would accomplish anything positive, I would say go ahead and do it, but it won’t. It would only justify the reason (if there even IS a reason) why they have moved on. The healthiest thing you can do for yourself now is accept that what you had in the past no longer exists and concentrate on cultivating relationships closer to home with people who want to be friends with you PLANNING WHAT TO DO WITH THE REST OF YOUR LONELY, MISERABLE LIFE, YOU OLD PILL! DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I recently bought our first house together. It has an outdoor kitchen and other features he really likes. I like it too, but there have been some issues already in the first month or two. Lately, he’s been wanting to have BBQs and get-togethers for his family. He invites all these people over who I don’t know. I’m not comfortable having people over all the time. He does it to show off the house. I’m exhausted from all these parties. Although I have expressed to him that I’m not comfortable, he still does it without asking me. I have expressed my feelings and concerns, but he doesn’t seem to care. I am a private person and want to enjoy my home. We did have a housewarming party, but he always wants to have more. I don’t know what to do anymore. He gets upset, and I’m always stuck cooking and cleaning. To him, I’m a party pooper and a grump. I just want my voice heard and for him not to be so selfish and a show-off. I also want him to consider my family, too. How do I cope? — PARTY POOPER IN THE WEST DEAR PARTY POOPER: A step in the right direction would be to quit playing cook and unpaid maid. Your inconsiderate boyfriend knows you don’t like doing it, so draw the line. Tell him you don’t like being ignored and will no longer tolerate the situation he has created. If he refuses to compromise, talk with an attorney about a plan for him to buy your half of the house. No law says this has to be your future. IS THE PLACE FULLY INSURED? IF SO, BURN IT TO THE GROUND AND FIND A DECENT GUY. MAKE SURE THE FIRE STARTS IN HIS OUTDOOR KITCHEN; AT WORST, HE’LL THINK HE DID SOMETHING TO CAUSE IT AND WILL FEEL HORRIBLE; AT BEST, THE AUTHORITIES WILL THINK HE DID SOMETHING TO CAUSE IT AND ARREST HIS SORRY ASS. IF IT’S NOT FULLY INSURED, JUST KILL HIM… AND FIND A DECENT GUY. DEAR ABBY: I have recently been contacted by Child Protective Services in another state regarding a great-nephew I knew nothing about. Of course, they were hoping for placement or financial support for the boy, who is 10. I am 62. I am not in a position to care for him, physically or financially. The boy is my brother’s grandson. When my brother and his wife divorced, she took the children and disappeared. I have had no contact or information regarding my niece and nephew for 35 years. Now there is this child in need. Would it be a good idea to ask if I could write to this child? I would be able to send birthday, Christmas presents and letters, but giving him full-time care isn’t possible. — CONFUSED GREAT-AUNT DEAR GREAT-AUNT: There is so much detail left out of your letter. Where are this boy’s father and mother? Are they incarcerated or dead? Where is your brother, the child’s grandfather? Whether to initiate contact with this newly discovered relative and send him cards and gifts might depend upon the kind of living situation he winds up in. Also, are you absolutely certain the person who contacted you is really from Child Protective Services, because it might be a scam. Do nothing until you have spoken to other family members and ascertain the veracity of the information you received.

On July 3, Blue Jays reliever Jose Cuas rolled into a tight game in Houston and did the most mathematically impossible thing any reliever could ever do. He allowed four straight base runners … on three pitches. Here we go: Intentional walk … single on the next pitch … hit batter on the next pitch … and then another HBP on the pitch after that. As you know, we don’t bother wasting actual pitches on those intentional walks anymore. So yep, that’s four batters reaching base on three pitches … which seems challenging, if only because … it’s never been done (not in the pitch-counting era, since 1988, anyway). But wait. There’s more, because the reliever who preceded Cuas to the mound, Zach Pop, allowed two more base runners on his last three pitches (but also got a line-drive out). So that’s six base runners … on six pitches … with an out mixed in there just for fun.