samhexum

Abby's I actually prefer them to Roy Rogers. And I love Ving Rhames' voiceovers in the commercials... WE'VE GOT THE MEATS!

Last night's sweetly odd (oddly sweet?) episode of THE ORVILLE had Dr. Finn (Penny Johnson-Jerald) realizing she'd developed feelings for the ship's robot, Isaac, and his crewmates' attempts to help him understand dating, especially as it pertains to dating insert nauseated face a woman. The best episode of season one had the two of them crash-landing on an alien planet with her two kids and him protecting and bonding with the kids (the older of whom is also the son of Dr. Bailey on GREY'S ANATOMY, so the poor kid is typecast as the son of black female doctors) while she was being held hostage. She'd been warmer to him ever since.

https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/preparing-for-an-anal-invasion.126883/ http://68.media.tumblr.com/9cff9da3b15c944e083977546c5c4c19/tumblr_opfvamDjaP1rp0vkjo1_500.gif

What do you want to know about me, Mr. Busybody?

Rare Fossil of Triassic Reptile Discovered in Antarctica The fossilized remains of an early reptile dating back some 250 million years have been uncovered in the unlikeliest of places: Antarctica. The discovery shows how wildlife recovered after the worst mass extinction in our planet’s history, and how Antarctica once hosted an ecosystem unlike any other. Needless to say, paleontological work in Antarctica is very different than it is elsewhere. Unlike Alberta or Montana, for example, which feature abundant rock outcrops, Antarctica is covered in a massive sheet of ice, obscuring much of its paleontological history. And it’s not as if Antarctica doesn’t have stories to tell—it very much does. It was only recently, within the last 30 to 35 million years, that the continent froze over. Before that, it was home to a warm climate, lush forests, rushing rivers, and a remarkable abundance of life. To find fossilized traces of this forgotten life, whether it be in Antarctica or elsewhere, scientists need to find rocks. Antarctica provides only two possibilities: islands along its coastline and the Central Transantarctic Mountains—a spine of mountains that cut a swath through the middle of the continent. The tops of these mountains poke through the glaciers, creating a rocky archipelago—and a place for paleontologists to do some prospecting. It’s here, on the Fremouw Formation of the Transantarctic mountains that Brandon Peecook, a paleontologist with the Field Museum of Natural History and the lead author of the new study, discovered the rare Triassic reptile. “Standing on the mountain, it was difficult to imagine how truly alien Antarctica must’ve looked like back then,” Peecook told Gizmodo. “Looking around, I could see no trace of macroscopic life for miles in every direction.” Indeed, Antarctica may be desolate and inhospitable today, but it wasn’t always that way. Hundreds of millions of years ago, the Fremouw Formation was home to a vibrant forest filled with life, from winged insects to four-legged reptilian herbivores. The discovery of a previously unknown iguana-sized reptile, dubbed Antarctanax shackletoni, is now adding to our knowledge of the continent’s former ecological glory. Antarctanax means “Antarctic king” and shackletoni is a tip of the hat to British polar explorer Ernest Shackleton. A. shackletoni was an archosaur, sharing a common ancestor with dinosaurs and crocodiles and living during the Early Triassic Period some 250 million years ago. It’s now one of the earliest reptiles to appear in the fossil record. Details of this discovery were published today in the Journal of Vertebrate Paleontology. The partial fossil consists of an excellently preserved vertebrae (including neck and back), a partial skull, two feet, some ribs, and an upper arm bone. It was discovered during an expedition to the Fremouw Formation during the Antarctic summer of 2010-2011. Analysis of these fossilized bones (particularly the skull) and the fossils found alongside it suggests it was a pint-sized carnivore, munching on bugs, amphibians, and early proto-mammals. The Early Triassic is of great interest to paleontologists because it came in the wake of one of the worst episodes in Earth’s history—the end-Permian mass extinction, a time when extreme and prolonged volcanism wiped out nearly 90 percent of our planet’s life. It resulted in a sweeping ecological reboot, setting the stage for the survivors to take over. Among these survivors were the archosaurs, who took full advantage. “A pattern we see over and over again with mass disturbances like the end-Permian mass extinction is that some of the animals who managed to survive quickly filled in the empty ecospaces,” Peecook told Gizmodo. “Archosaurs are a great example—a group of animals that were able to do practically everything. This clade just went totally ballistic.” Indeed, archosaurs, including dinosaurs, were among the greatest beneficiaries of this recovery period, experiencing enormous growth and diversity. Prior to the mass extinction, these creatures were limited to equatorial regions, but afterwards they were “everywhere,” according to Peecook—including, as we now know, Antarctica. The continent was home to A. shackletoni some 10 million years before the appearance of true dinosaurs. As an aside, Antarctica did host dinosaurs, but not until the Jurassic Period. This discovery is also shedding light on Antarctica’s distinctive animals. Because Antarctica and South Africa were physically connected at the time, paleontologists worked under the assumption that the two regions had much in common in terms of the local wildlife. And because fossils are abundant in South Africa, paleontologists used this record to make inferences about the kind of life that likely existed in Antarctica. But as Peecook explained, this is turning out to be a mistake; Antarctica hosted an ecology unlike any other. “We know the South Africa fossil record really well, but in Antarctica we’ve only discovered around 200 species,” he said. “But we don’t find these species anywhere else. Paleontologists have only gone to Antarctica a few times, but every time they go they find new species, and surprising new occurrences—it’s really exciting. The original argument that you could connect these two environments together is now incorrect. The Antarctic record has lots of unique things happening.” That Antarctica featured a unique set of species is not surprising. Like today, the continent was at a high altitude, featuring prolonged days in the summer and extended nights in the winter. Animals and plants had to adapt to survive, thereby adopting novel physical characteristics and survival strategies. Scientists discover 'disturbing' cavity roughly two-thirds the size of Manhattan beneath Antarctica A massive cavity that is two-thirds the size of Manhattan and nearly the height of the Chrysler Building is growing at the bottom of one of the world’s most dangerous glaciers - a discovery that NASA scientists called “disturbing.” The hole, which is almost 1,000 feet tall, was seen during the space agency’s study of the disintegrating Thwaites Glacier in West Antarctica, NASA said Wednesday. It’s big enough to contain 14 billion tons of ice, most of which has melted over the last three years. Thwaites Glacier, one of the hardest places to reach on Earth, is responsible for around 4% of the global sea rise. Scientists had long predicted the glacier was not tightly attached to the bedrock underneath it and expected to find some gaps. Yet the immense size and fast-moving growth rate of the hole in Thwaites was called both “disturbing” and “surprising” by researchers. "[The size of] a cavity under a glacier plays an important role in melting," the study's lead author, Pietro Milillo, said. "As more heat and water get under the glacier, it melts faster." Thwaites holds enough ice to raise the world ocean just over 2 feet and backstops neighboring glaciers that are capable of rising sea levels an additional 8 feet if all ice were lost. The cavity was seen using NASA’s Operation IceBridge, an airborne campaign beginning in 2010 that studies connections between the polar regions and the global climate. Researchers hope the new findings will help others preparing for fieldwork in the area better understand the ice-ocean interactions. “The findings highlight the need for detailed observations of Antarctic glaciers' undersides in calculating how fast global sea levels will rise in response to climate change,” according to the study by NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory.

Last year, a wildlife photographer spotted a “one in a million” coyote with captivating blue eyes while out on a walk in California’s Point Reyes National Seashore. The sighting quickly became national news and prompted an investigation by National Geographic, which confirmed the coyote’s eye color was indeed rare — as coyotes’ irises are almost always some shade of gold. At the time, Juan Negro, a senior researcher at the Spanish Council for Research in Spain, told the publication he hadn’t seen something like that in the 25 years he’d been studying animal coloration. “Deviants, or strange colors, arise from time to time as mutants,” Negro suggested back in June. It’s only been about 10 months since the female coyote was first singled out in California, and it appears it has already lost some of its rarity. In recent months, at least four more coyotes with similar icy blues have been identified in the area, National Geographic confirmed this week. Since all of the creatures have been located within a 100-mile radius, scientists say it’s safe to assume the blue-eyed animals are all offspring from one “mutant.” However, it’s unclear if the initial female coyote spotted in Point Reyes was the one to introduce the mutant gene. Some scientists explored the possibility the blue-eyed animals were “coydogs,” a canid hybrid. But ultimately that hypothesis was dismissed because the coyotes’ didn’t appear to have altered fur coats or differences in bone structure. “How pervasive is the mutation? We don’t know. It’s not something we were aware of beforehand,” Camilla Fox, the founder and executive director of the nonprofit Project Coyote, told the San Francisco Chronicle on Thursday. Fox said the agency plans to track the blue-eyed coyotes to see if the trend grows and to gain insight into how the mutant gene was introduced into that particular pack. Park visitors equipped with cameras and smartphones could also help by snapping pictures of any coyotes they see while traveling around Point Reyes, wildlife officials said. In the coming years, scientists aim to learn more about how the eye color will affect the animal’s ability to evolve and thrive in its environment. “They have the color which is best for their environments and their way of living,” Negro recently explained to Nat Geo, adding it could have some negative impacts such as harming their ability to blend into their surroundings — avoiding predators and sneaking up on prey — and increase their sensitivity to light. While there are still a lot of unanswered questions, Fox is glad the discovery of blue-eyed coyotes have attracted attention in The Golden State. “[Hopefully it] elicits and encourages people to view coyotes in the wild … with a lens instead of a gun,” she told the Chronicle, noting an estimated 500,000 coyotes are killed each year in the U.S., many for sport. Photographers in Point Reyes say the blue-eyed beauties appear to be healthy, meaning there’s potential for even more “mutants” in the near future.

I was reading an article about Senor Twist’s new movie: Velvet Buzzsaw‘s best work of art isn’t the deceased Dease’s disturbing oeuvre or the Instagram-worthy “sphere” exhibit; it’s star Jake Gyllenhaal‘s naked body. Okay, so technically Gyllenhaal never appears entirely nude in Velvet Buzzsaw, but he gets close. Less than 14 minutes into the film, we go to his character, art critic Morf Vandewalt’s home. We see a nude Morf spread out in a lounge chair, with only a laptop covering himself up. Aside from being a gorgeous shot of Gyllenhaal, it shows us a moment where the usually glib and in control Morf is completely vulnerable. He is in the middle of working on an art review, and he’s making a big decision about his life. Morf’s boyfriend Ed (Sedale Threatt Jr.) enters the room wearing nothing but a towel and luring Morf into the pool. The seduction is so intense that the camera lingers on Ed as he completely disrobes and jumps into the pool. Morf, however, is uninterested. He is now obsessed with someone new: aspiring art dealer Josephina (Zawe Ashton). It’s this love that propels Morf for the rest of the film, pushing him to lie in reviews and support Josephina on her new project involving Dease. There is great storytelling in this brief scene, and great acting, too. Gyllenhaal flits from being just lounging in his home, to brushing off a lover, to musing about a new one. He communicates this important shift in Morf without words — just looks and gestures. The fact that he’s nude doesn’t distract so much as underlines that this is Morf without his carefully tailored suit of pretensions. This is him, as a man, undone. I’m sure y'all will have the same reaction to this as I did: Hmm… Sedale Threatt… A 14-year NBA vet who played for several teams, including taking over as the Lakers' starting point guard when Magic Johnson was diagnosed with HIV. Fun fact: The elder Mr. Threatt has at least 14 children, including TWO named Sedale Threatt, Jr. The booty above belongs to the younger Junior.

When I watched the news at 4:30 AM, it was 3 degrees in Central Park, with a wind-chill factor of -14. But no precip, so it was a dry cold. You don't notice it as much. Monday is supposed to 50, 55 on Tu, 52 W & Th. I'll be loading the beach gear into the car Sunday night.

A world-famous opera singer, who is also a University of Michigan professor, was arrested along with his conductor husband on felony sexual assault charges for a nearly decade-old incident in Houston, police said Wednesday. Opera man David Daniels and his husband, Scott Walters, were arrested separately yesterday around 1:30 p.m. and are being held at Washtenaw County Jail, Ann Arbor police confirmed to The Post. The couple, who were wed by Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg in 2014, face extradition to Texas where they’re accused of raping opera singer Samuel Schultz in May 2010 when Schultz was 23 and pursuing his master’s degree, according to the Houston Police Department and astatement on Schultz’s website. Schultz reported the crime to Houston police in July 2018 and the department presented charges to the Harris County District Attorney yesterday, which accepted the charges on the same day, the department said. The charging documents remain sealed and an extradition hearing is yet to be determined. Schultz told The Post he was alerted by the Houston Police Department of the couple’s arrest but declined further comment. He wrote about the incident on his website shortly after his claims were publicized last year, writing the rape was “life-altering” and “devastating.” “Yes, men are raped. I did not know that the word ‘rape’ applied to what happened to me until I lethargically went to tell a friend, and told her through tears and emptiness, what happened to me,” Schultz wrote of the incident on his website. “In fact, I was so naïve that I didn’t know that I should have gone to the hospital or even what a ‘rape kit’ is. We must do better in educating each person about the realities and tragedy of rape.” He wrote he came forward with his story to encourage others to publicize their assault in the wake of the #MeToo movement. Schultz’s allegation isn’t the first time Daniels, a renowned countertenor, has been accused of sexual misconduct. He’s named in a federal civil lawsuit by former UM student Andrew Lipian on “quid pro quo sexual harassment” allegations, court papers show. Lipian claims he was invited to Daniels’ apartment in March 2017 to watch “Ru Paul’s Drag Race” because Daniels was “lonely,” records show. Lipian alleges Daniels gave him “several drinks of bourbon” and tricked him into taking Ambien that Lipian mistook for Tylenol PM, court papers say. Daniels then removed Lipian’s clothes and “forced himself upon” Lipian and “groped and touched his genitals and face.” Daniels called Lipian’s claims “fake and malicious,” according to MLive.com. Matt Hennessy, a Houston-based criminal attorney representing Daniels and Walters, said the couple plans to fight Schultz’s allegations. “David and Scott are innocent of any wrongdoing. Sam Schultz is not a victim. He never would have gotten this much attention from his singing, and he knows and resents that fact,” Hennessy wrote in a statement. “He waited eight years to complain about adult, consensual sex to ride the MeToo movement to unearned celebrity. We will fight this.” THEY'RE ALREADY WEARING PRISON ORANGE THEM IN A FEW YEARS...

The father of a baby born to a 12-year-old girl in Perth, Australia is also believed to be a young teenager, with police saying they currently have no concerns for the welfare of any other children. The girl was reportedly 11 when she became pregnant and reportedly gave birth at home unaware she was pregnant. The father is reportedly 14 years old. Contrary to previous reports, the young girl did not give birth in a hospital but in her home, The West Australian reports. “The department is unable to comment on situations like this in order to protect the privacy of the individuals and their families,” a spokesman said this morning. A spokeswoman said police were working closely with the families, the Department of Communities and the Health Department said previously. Despite both being of similarly young ages, the teens are at risk of prosecution with precedent showing the father is usually the one charged, according to Sally Dechow, a Youth Legal solicitor from Western Australia. “Legally they could both be charged, but in practice, we’ve found it’s usually the boy who is charged,” she said. “You have to look at the welfare of these kids and whether it’s in the public interest to prosecute children of this age.” Charges occur at the discretion of the Western Australia Police, taking into account issues like whether the prosecution would be in the interest of the public, and provide assistance to the children involved. “There are complex social issues, which are being managed by all agencies, and the current priority is to ensure appropriate support is provided to the family,” a spokeswoman for the DCHD said on Friday. “The West Australia Police Force has identified a person believed to be the young father of the newborn, who himself is a child and is known to the young mother,” the Department said in a statement. The Department of Communities said a co-ordinated response was required from the state government and external support agencies in cases like this, in both the short and long term.

Kathy Bates was photographed this week looking like a new woman after reportedly losing 60 pounds following treatment for cancer. The 70-year-old actress, who beat ovarian and breast cancer, is currently battling lymphedema, which she developed after getting lymph node surgery. The condition has caused painful swelling in her limbs. But recently, the “American Horror Story” star said she is “feeling great,” according to People. “I’ve lost a lot of weight and it’s really helped with my symptoms,” she told the outlet. “I just still have to wear compression sleeves or guard against nicks and bug bites because that can lead to sepsis.” Bates, who was once told to keep her health struggles a secret to protect her career, has become a national spokesperson for Lymphatic Education & Research Network to spread the word, as symptoms can often be misdiagnosed as simple weight gain, she said. “Some doctors think it’s cosmetic and not life-threatening …So it goes undiagnosed and the disease progresses for years and gets worse and worse,” she added. Bates was honored at the WebMD Health Heroes event this month as the 2019 “Game Changer” for her efforts to increase awareness of the condition.

Alexander Hamilton may have come to America — but it’s the porn parody “Hamiltoe” that really made a splash. New York comedian Eitan Levine really cleaned up at Saturday’s Adult Video News Awards (the porn community’s answer to the Oscars). He bagged Clever Title of the Year honors for “Hamiltoe,” a porn parody he came up with after seeing the smash Broadway show. The 29-year-old Upper West Side “weird journalist-comedian hybrid” tells The Post of his surprise win, “It’s the best bragging rights of all time.” Levine, who grew up Modern Orthodox in Springfield, NJ, and graduated from Yeshiva University, admits that while he’s not the most likely candidate to dominate the porn space, he’s only human. “I think everyone watches porn, to be completely honest,” says Levine, who also lived in Israel. “It’s a bigger red flag now if you don’t watch porn. If you don’t have a computer full of porn, you must have a freezer full of human feet.” The “aggressively single” Levine is basking in his big win — even if his traditional bubbe isn’t. “I don’t think Bubbe knows what porn is — she still has a flip phone,” says Levine, who adds that the rest of his family are trying to get on board with the decidedly unkosher comedy. The former writer for Elite Daily explains the process for the beloved porn parody. “The original plot was that Britain had intense porn rules so Alexander Hamilton would be a pounding father to make a better porn,” he tells The Post. “Hamiltoe” isn’t for the faint of heart, with explicit sex scenes, although it’s nothing Levine can’t handle. “It’s aggressive porn — they’re very into it. There’s a lot of mascara running,” he says. It was produced by Wood Rocket, which helmed other parodies including “Strokémon,” “Assventure Time” and “Fap To The Future,” according to the “Hamiltoe” GoFundMe page, which has raised $1,000 to offset a documentary Levine’s working on. As for the award nominations in November, Levine says he was blown away that his little porn that could was nominated for four awards, and immediately mounted a “for your consideration” campaign. “Saturday Night Live’s” “Weekend Update” even name-dropped the fledgling porn with a joke about Hamilton throwing away his shot. For the awards in Las Vegas, where Cardi B performed, Levine admits it was a culture shock for the nice Jewish boy from Jersey, who walked the red carpet draped in authentic colonial garb. The tears — and whatever else — flowed when he won. “I absolutely lost it — it was the coolest thing that ever happened,” says Levine, who adds that he’s officially done with porn, as soon as he finishes one item on his to-do list: “I’m going to Jizney-land!” The outsize attention on “Hamiltoe,” which also won the award for best soundtrack, also includes a tweet from the Pulitzer Prizes committee: “This amuses us. Will the ‘Hamilton’ porn parody also win a Pulitzer Prize?” But for Levine, there’s no comparison between the two: “Ours is free online, and you don’t have to enter a lottery to see it.” Lin-Manuel Miranda is rumored to be a fan as well. But Levine still maintains whose production is best: “You can’t jerk off to ‘Hamilton,’ but you can jerk off to ‘Hamiltoe’ — that’s the biggest difference.”

BOUGHT THIS 45 AS A TEEN: PREFER THIS FROM YEARS LATER:

Why is it either/or?

“The Wendy Williams Show” is getting a temporary new host. Nick Cannon will take over the show on Feb. 4, Feb. 5 and Feb. 6. He’ll be continuing Wendy Williams‘ signature segment, “Hot Topics.” Earlier this month, Williams’ family announced that she was still recovering from her fractured shoulder and also had to be hospitalized as a result of symptoms from her Graves’ disease. “Despite her strong desire to return, she is taking a necessary, extended break from her show to focus on her personal and physical well-being,” the statement read. A source told Page Six at the time, “Staff at [Williams’] show are eager to get back to work. We are all hoping she is well. The mood at the set is good … We just want Wendy to get better.” Distributor and producer Debmar-Mercury previously announced that the show would feature a variety of hosts starting the week of Jan. 28. Williams, 54, fractured her shoulder in December and then worried fans when she slurred her words on-air. She later apologized and blamed the painkillers she was taking to treat her fracture. Since then, Williams has delayed her show’s return twice. It was originally supposed to return shortly after the New Year but was pushed back to Jan. 14. The show pushed the return date again to Jan. 21 in order to allow Williams to heal and come back at “200%.”

Porn free... As free as the wind Beancounter blows... As free as the grass grows... Porn free to follow your heart...

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-25QhQihqaTg/VJ_wAsD3F5I/AAAAAAAAOIk/SY3gOdXn6as/s1600/joe-gif.gif OR LIONS!

still enjoying

https://images.porninspector.com/b/boys-destroyed/gallery02/06.jpg http://xxxbunker.com/clayton_sucks_massive_black_cock_gay_video.jpg http://redneckcock.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Treasure-Island-Media-TimSUCK-Jacob-Lee-and-Hot-Rod-White-Guy-Sucking-A-Big-Black-Cock-Amateur-Gay-Porn-5.jpg http://www.mrpinks.com/images/uploads/02itsgonnahurt.jpg

I think the obvious punchline is: Thank God she wasn’t subjected to 90 hours (so 3 3/4 days, BTW) of elevator music. The housekeeper who was trapped in a small elevator at an Upper East Side townhouse for three days has been given the week off by her billionaire employer — and has “no intention of suing” him, a neighbor of the woman said Tuesday. “She said her boss is treating her so good, like family,” said the neighbor of Queens resident 53-year-old Marites Fortaliza. Fortaliza endured a weekend of hell when she became stuck Friday in the 3-foot by 4-foot elevator of the 48 E. 46th Street townhome belonging to conservative political mega-donor Warren Stephens and his wife. The couple’s longtime housekeeper was freed from the elevator Monday morning — only after a courier couldn’t make a delivery at the address and contacted the family, and they discovered her. Fortaliza’s neighbor told reporters gathered at her home Tuesday that Fortaliza wanted to give a message to the media that she would not be coming home and that she will be staying with her sister in New Jersey for a week. “She said she’s doing fine,” the neighbor said, adding that Stephens gave Fortaliza the week off. In a statement through Stephens’ investment banking firm on Monday, the family called Fortaliza “a valued member of the Stephens’ extended family for 18 years.”

Alexander the Great was ‘buried alive’ after disease paralyzed him The mystery over the death of Alexander the Great may have finally been solved – and his passing was grislier than historians had ever imagined. The fearsome military genius succumbed to a rare disease that left him paralyzed for six days, gradually robbing him of his ability to move, speak and breath, claims a new study. It means the ancient Macedonian ruler was likely still alive while his loyal soldiers prepared his body for burial in 323 BC. His muscles were paralyzed to the point that doctors couldn’t see he was still breathing, meaning he was pronounced dead nearly a week early. One of history’s finest warmongers, Alexander the Great established the largest empire the ancient world had ever seen through a series of ferocious military conquests. At the age of 25, his army overcame overwhelming odds to crush the Persian territories of Asia Minor, Syria and Egypt without suffering a single defeat. The towering leader died suddenly in Babylon aged 32 and for decades historians have puzzled over what finished him off, with some blaming typhoid, alcoholism or even poison. Now health scientists in New Zealand think they have the answer: A rare autoimmune disease that destroyed his body from the inside. The findings were published in The Ancient History Bulletin. They suggest the condition left him paralyzed and unable to speak, meaning his staff failed to recognize, for nearly a week, that their king was still alive. “I wanted to stimulate new debate and discussion and possibly rewrite the history books by arguing Alexander’s real death was six days later than previously accepted,” said study author Dr. Katherine Hall, of the Dunedin School of Medicine in New Zealand. “His death may be the most famous case of pseudothanatos, or false diagnosis of death, ever recorded.” Her team pored over ancient accounts of Alexander’s symptoms, as well as modern medical textbooks, for their research. His illness is said to have begun after a raucous night of drinking in which he downed 12 pints of wine. Alexander complained of fatigue and “generalized aches” the next morning, but chose to power through another dozen pints of wine. A day later and sharp abdominal pains plagued Alexander, while an increasingly severe fever took hold. Bedridden and in excruciating pain, the great leader gradually lost his ability to move, only able to flicker his eyes and twitch his hands just eight days after his symptoms began. By the eleventh day, the King of Macedonia and Persia was pronounced dead, though staff claimed he remained sound of mind right until the end. Hall says Alexander’s symptoms match up with the brain disorder Guillain-Barré Syndrome (GBS). The disease occurs when the body’s immune system attacks its nervous system, gradually paralyzing the victim. It affects one in 100,000 people in the UK and US today. Hall says GBS would explain the fearsome warrior’s paralysis, which first took the use of his legs and arms before rendering him unable to speak. The disease, caused by a bacterial infection in the stomach, does not affect the brain, which matches reports that Alexander was sound of mind through his illness. His new diagnosis raises the gruesome possibility that Alexander was still alive long after he was pronounced dead. At the time, doctors didn’t use your pulse to check if you were still alive, instead scouring victims for signs they were still breathing. The paralysis would have gradually restricted his respiratory muscles until his breaths were so small that doctors couldn’t spot he was alive Greek scholars later wrote that in the days after his death, Alexander’s body didn’t decompose, proving the warrior king was a god. But Hall says this may have been because he was in fact still breathing. However, Alexander’s breathing was so restricted that he likely was in a coma by the time preparations for his death began. “It is very likely [he] was in a deep coma by this stage and would have had no awareness when they began their task,” she said. Much about Alexander’s incredible life – and grim death – remains a mystery.

Check the fine print at the bottom of my initial post. I didn't want anyone to lose sleep over the answer.

The elevator from the first story is 3 feet by 4 feet... for three days!